When You Feel Horrible

Foreign. It's Brendon Burchard. And welcome to another episode of the Brendon show. What's up, y'? All? How do you deal when you feel like crap? That's the topic today. You guys have been asking me about it. It's like, hey, Brendan, do you ever get in a funk? Do you ever feel terrible? Do you ever have a bad day? If you get a bad day, what do you do? I think this is really an interesting conversation, so I hope you'll tune in, Share this with your friends. The challenge that we all face is we all have days where we feel like crap. And I've learned that there's three reasons I feel like crap. There's five things I can do right away, and I hope this helps you. But. But first. Hi, guys. I hope you're all doing great and having a phenomenal day. What do you do when you feel like crap? Like, what actions do you take? How do you manage your thoughts? How do you manage yourself? I'd love to hear what you guys say as we go along here. I know some of you just want to sometimes when you feel like crap, stay in bed. You know, like, lots of people feel like crap and they're like, am I bored? Am I just tired? Am I having a bad thoughts? Am I, you know, am I stuck? We all have those questions, so today that's what I'm gonna be taking on. Hi, guys. I hope you're all doing great. Please do grab anybody or tag anybody who you think might be having a bad day or has had a bad week or bad month because this topic is gonna be super, super helpful for them. I mean, super helpful. Okay, so I'm gonna share three things that I do when I feel like crap, where I think that comes from for me personally and what I specifically. When you feel like crap, do not pretend that that is a mystery, that feeling that you have when you're down, you're sad, you're in a funk, you're bored. You just don't like the negative emotions you might be feeling. Stop pretending that that feeling just took over your body. And oh, my gosh, I don't know what to do with it because what I've learned is usually when you feel like crap, that's coming from three specific places. Number one, when you feel like crap, it's often just coming straight up from fatigue. You didn't sleep well, you didn't eat well, you didn't manage your physical body. So now it's catching up with you. Right? You had too much wine two days ago, and now it caught up with you 48 hours, and you didn't even realize it. Like, your body is depleted, you feel like crap. When you need rest, when you need recovery, and you have to listen to that, y', all, you gotta do a better job of listening to that. When your body is saying, hey, man, we need a break here. We need a break from the caffeine or the alcohol or the lack of sleep, the first thing is to start taking better care of your physical body. The more you take good care of your physical body, the less like it is. You're full of crap over and over and over and over again. Now, there's emotional things and there's the ways you manage your mind. We'll talk about those. But often when you feel like crap, it's just kind of a hangover effect, if not alcohol, a hangover effect of poor sleep, a hangover effect of not eating well. It's just like you're really tired and lethargic by the way you've managed your body. And I asked this question in, like, High Performance Habits, my last book, and the motivation manifesto, I said, how is it that that very few of us would go to the neighbor's house and, you know, just break through the windows, throw garbage in that house, vandalize that house, and yet so many of us on a daily basis, vandalize the temple that we have been given by our creator. We vandalize our own physical body. You know, we don't take care of ourselves, and then we end up feeling like crap, and we're surprised by it. I don't want you to ever be surprised again. I mean, I think that's one sort of mark of real maturity or consciousness, is that you learn to anticipate how you're going to feel later on based on your actions today. Is that you learn to dig deep and understand, like, why do I feel the way that I feel right now? And when we are more able to anticipate how we're going to feel based on our current actions, and when we do feel a certain emotion or feeling that we don't like, we have the wherewithal to kind of take a step back, go, why am I feeling this? Meaning we're more conscious of the feeling and we explore it more. Do that over and over and over and over again, and you have less bad days. Not to say the world isn't gonna throw something at you, because I said, there's three reasons I tend to feel like crap. Number one is just straight up Fatigue number two is reaction. Every time I feel in a funk or I feel in a bad mood, or I feel some negative positive range, I go say, what am I reacting to right now? Maybe somebody was rude to me this morning. Maybe somebody popped in and gave a poor comment. Maybe I'm reacting to an email I got may. I'm reacting to a negative thought I had this morning. Maybe I had. I'm reacting still to that guy who cut me off in traffic this morning. And I'm still freaking out about it. But usually feeling like crap is actually coming from a reaction. So ask what am I reacting to? Because usually when you feel like crap, if you're not sure of why you're reacting to something, but you're just reacting to it unconsciously, you're not aware of it, you're not in tune with what's really happening. And so this funk is on you. But secretly in the back of your mind, something happened that really upset you and you're still tracking on that. So I always look for, am I reacting to something that just happened to me? Am I reacting to something that was triggered for me? Am I reacting to something because someone said something? Am I reacting to something cause I'm embarrassed? Am I reacting because I did this, I shouldn't have done it? Am I reacting cause I feel behind, right? Sometimes overwhelm creates this reaction, right? There's all this stuff. You react to it and what do you react to it with stress, you react to it by like getting tense. You react to all these things on your plate with anger. Why does this have to happen to me? Why did I over commit myself? And we get mad at ourselves. And that's the stuff of what I'm talking about, of reaction. When I'm in a funk, I almost always know I'm reacting to something. What am I reacting to? So I'll sit down and I'll journal. I'll sit down and I'll think about what am I reacting to in such a way that I feel this way? What am I reacting to in such a way that I'm feeling this way, feeling this negative feeling, or feeling this boredom or feeling this funk. I think that's really important, right? Reaction often comes from sadness, right? Something could have happened two, three days ago, but you've been so busy, it's just now processing in the back of your mind. I mean, have you ever guys had that before where like, literally think about it, like something negative or sad happened three days ago, you didn't feel it then. Cause you're Busy. And then you have a moment to breathe or you go on a workout and you're coming back, you're like, oh my gosh, why do I feel like crap? And you realize you're just reacting to something that happened three, four days ago. So be aware of your reactions. So I said there's three things. Number one, that makes me feel like crap. Sometimes it's fatigue, it's the way I'm caring for my physical body. Number two, it's reaction. Number three, rumination. Rumination, what does that mean? It means you get on a topic in your brain and you keep spinning it over and over and over again. Like playing a broken tape, you know, you're just playing it over and over and over again. What do we do? Well, we get upset about something and you just can't get off it. You just keep thinking of it over and over and over and over again. So you're ruminating usually on a negative circumstance, negative result, negative emotion, negative feeling, negative interaction. And you are running on that thing over and over and over again. And so it's like what happens for a lot of people as an example is maybe some days you feel doubt, you feel upset about something, you're unsure if you can handle it, and you let doubt stop you. When all doubt is, is a signal. Doubt is just a signal to learn more, to skill up, to ask questions, to get ready, to acknowledge you could improve in this area, to acknowledge that maybe you need some help in this area. And what happens though is when you get doubtful. Many of us get on a merry go round of doubt, right? We think of why we're doubtful. I'm insufficient, I'm not good, I'm not worthy, I'm stupid, I'm not as good as them. And we start spinning that like a merry go round in our head and all of a sudden we just spin the doubt so many times it turns into fear and then turns into self disgust and then we got to throw up, you know, we feel terrible. So I'm here to urge you, be thoughtful about what you are ruminating on. If you feel like crap, I promise one of these three reasons usually going on for you, you're tired, that's fatigue, you're reacting to something you might not be aware you're reacting to. And number three, you're ruminating, you're thinking about something consciously over and over and over and over again. And you need to interrupt that pattern. So how do you do that? Well, here's how I get out of feeling like crap. I mean, the first thing that I do is I get up and I move. I change my location and I change my movement and my breath. So what do I do? I hop up. If I feel like crap, I'm like, I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna go outside, I'm gonna take a walk. But for me specifically, I go out, I jump in that ocean, I swim a bunch, I mean maybe even literally 2, 3, 4, 5 minutes swim, come back in, take a cool shower and I get my brain back on track. What I had to do is just change my location and change my physical movement. Like move. Like if you ever been to some of you guys been to HPX or High Performance Academy, my event and what we train you to do is just stand up, bounce in place with your eyes closed, taking 10 deep breaths. After you do that, set your intention for what's next. Go. It's just taking breath and moving your body a little bit. Because yeah, you know what the easiest thing to do is when you're in a funk, Sit on the couch and watch 40 hours of Netflix. But that doesn't make you feel better. And even if it does take you feel better, it takes so long. And the other behaviors you're learning to do there, disengage from uncomfortable feelings, munch on things. All of a sudden you actually, maybe you feel better, but it's just time away from your thoughts. But there's a faster way to recover than that and that's just to move your body. Second thing that's huge for me is setting an intention. Okay, I feel like crap right now. Got it. Get up, move. Maybe jump in the ocean, maybe take a cool shower, get some water, take 10 bounce in place, take 10 deep breaths and then say, okay, what is my intention now for this next hour? Notice I'm not trying to say. I'm going to look at all my goals and go achieve and change the world. And go. No. For the next hour, what would be a win in this next hour, what would be 1, 2, 3, 4 things I could do just in the next hour, Just in the next hour to feel better, to feel like I've got momentum again, to feel like I'm progressing again, to feel like I'm back in charge, I'm back in control. Not this negative emotion, not this negative thing, but I'm back in charge. What would that be for me? That's a thought that goes in my mind. Third big idea, if I move my body, if I set my intention and I take small actions towards what I need to and I still feel like I'm in a funk right away. I'm going to put some positive audio in my ears, right? I'm going to grab these little earbuds and put them in, and I'm going to listen to a positive podcast, positive music, positive audiobook. I'm just going to, like, interrupt it, literally put this in, turn it up, and listen to something positive. Or if I'm totally geeking that day and I'm just, you know, super funk, I'm going to go straight to, like, I don't know, like, go on YouTube and I'm gonna watch some, like, you know, 10 most emotional, amazing, you know, American Idol, you know, surprises or something like that, or America's Got Talent. I'll watch some talent thing for, like, two, three minutes. That, like, somebody who did something inspiring, who you didn't think was gonna be amazing, something goofy like that. But that's gonna help me change my feelings because I'm listening or consuming something that's really positive for me. Many of you guys know I go to my books. I'll read, yes, from my books or from a shelf of books I have of positivity, self development, self improvement, self help, you know, some spirituality. I'll just read some things that will help kind of reset me. Because you know what? Sometimes reading or listening helps put some new thoughts in your brain to interrupt that rumination. Fourth big thing I do is action. So I said, what I'll do is I'll say, what's three things I can do in this next hour to get myself back on track? But then I'll say, okay, good, I got some momentum here. I'm feeling better by the end of the day. What five things can I do by the end of this day to, you know, what, pat myself on the back, to feel like I'm doing something good, to feel like I'm moving ahead, just taking action. Because sometimes you want to feel like, you know, you're back in command. And getting back in command, that might mean for you, you do the laundry, man. You know, you make the bed, you straighten up the office. You know, you answer those 10 critical emails you already flagged. You know, you do something that actually moves your thoughts or moves your dreams forward because your mind is just saying, hey, man, let's grab a little control here. Let's have a phenomenal day. Let's get, you know, get ourselves turned around. I know you get what I'm saying. Last big idea for you today is to share that vulnerability with a good friend or a partner. Or a spouse. Like, if you're just in a funk and you're like, dang, I've been in a funk for like two, three days. Tell somebody that if you're in a funk for, you know, two, three days and you're just like, ah, I'm sad. I've done what Brendan said. I've moved, I've walked around, I've set my intentions. I'm getting some momentum here. I did a, you know, I got some rest or I meditated to recover fatigue. My body, I am eating better, but I'm still just not feeling it. Then what's happening is you're usually just off that path or that journey. You've lost a little sense of presence and connection with life. And sometimes the way to get presence and connection back with life is through somebody you care about, somebody you love, connect with them and say, hey, you know what? I'm just in a funk. You got an hour. Hey, I'm in a funk. You want to go for a walk? Hey, I feel like crap. Want to go to the movies? Hey, I feel like crap. Let's go get something to eat. Hey, I feel like crap. Let's go work out together. Let's take a long run together. Like, go do something with somebody who you like. I know that's so basic, but the world is full of sadness. But it's also full of sadness because we have separated ourselves so we can connect here. But you and I both know lots of people can connect on social media, but they don't connect in real life with people. And they haven't challenged themselves to be vulnerable, open, courageous, authentic, real with other people, especially when the negative emotions hit. But listen, if you hold your negative emotions to yourself your whole life, that's not going to be a life well lived. You got to learn to connect with people and say, here's where I'm at. It sucks. I don't like it. I've been trying to get over it, but I'm just, I'm struggling, man. And if you're not ever sharing that, I'm telling you what, it's going to create a great obstacle for you to grow. So share, connect with somebody and just let them know I'm in a funk. Don't know what to do. Want to hang out. That's all you have to say in a funk. Don't know what to do. Want to hang. That's all you have to do. Don't over architect it. Just get around people. And if you get around great people and more often more positive people that will change the game for you. If you're ready to take your life to a whole new level, make sure you grab my book, High Performance How Extraordinary People Become that Way. It's available on Amazon right now. And when you order your copy, you're really supporting my channel and the message. And you're also getting a book that will reveal to you 20 years of my research and into what is it that helps people go to a new level of success in their life? What does it really take? What habits are proven to help you reach long term success in your career, your health, your personal life, your relationships? It's called High Performance Habits How Extraordinary People Become that Way. It's available on Amazon right now. Ra.