Mental Health Matter - The leftover edition

Mm.

This is how my hands go right at the end of that, so I figured I had to do the same thing. All right, I do not know why I'm small and square. Um, anyway, as DJ and I talk about all of the time, uh, what is that? Technology is not my friend. Hello everyone, thank you for coming to Mental Health Matters on Saturday night, 9 PM Eastern, most Saturdays. Since 2018. And yeah, I know a lot of you folks have your podcasts numbered, but I never started counting. I'm not going to start counting now. But my plan is in 2028, that will be the final Mental Health Matters. So get them while you can. So good morning, good afternoon, good evening. For those of you who are the replay viewers watching this, it could be any time, and I just thank you for checking in. So why are we here? Because 2 of every 3 gun deaths that we hear about are suicides. And if we talk about mental health and we talk about suicide prevention, then we can save lives, not just from those who take their lives with a firearm, but those who are struggling as well. So that's the purpose of tonight. If you are brand new, welcome in. Thank you. If you're returning like my lovely crabby turtle, Um, oh, leftovers. Sorry, silly me. Y'all know I get too distracted if I start looking at the, the things. But, um, yeah, so, uh, hi Moo, how are you, my friend? I'm going to hide the comments because that's DJ's job. DJ will star stuff that I need to pay attention to, and at least for the first 10 minutes or so, I will stay on track, and then he'll call you all out. So appreciate you all for popping in. All right, so tonight we talk about leftovers and see, it's another one of those nights I have notes, right? Leftovers. We just had, I hope you all just had a lovely gut expansion on Thursday with your turkey dinners and friends and family around a table. I know that every holiday season I get to say grace. And one of the things I love saying grace about at the holiday table is the fact that we are blessed with friends and family to be surrounded by. So gratitude, well, Thanksgiving, right? So we want to give some thanks, and that's kind of the idea of the holiday. Some holidays are harder than others. If this is your first holiday without a loved one or someone is missing from the table, it makes the holidays a lot harder. And it's one of those things where until you've been through that event, It's nothing that anyone's really going to explain, but, uh, know that, you know, over time we move on. But if it is your first holiday without somebody, just know that Christmas is going to suck too. Yeah, pretty much. So anyway, um, choice, self-talk, finding joy, and choosing— those are all the little random things that I put in the description for today, or there, because if you're on Facebook, it's up there. If you're on YouTube, it's down there. I don't know where the heck it is on LinkedIn. Oh wait, I'm not on LinkedIn tonight. So what are you going to talk about? Lots of food in the belly. Yes. Friends and family. This can be joyous and fun and it can be frustrating and annoying. We all have those family members. And sometimes if you don't have those family members, then you might be that family member. We don't know. So, um, All we can do is we can't control our family members and/or friends that come to the holidays. What we can control is how we react, and we can work on that a little bit every day. So Mr. Michael Ballinger is out there on the YouTube side. I know I saw him before I popped on here, and he happened to help with tonight's podcast. Oops. And Apparently I forgot to put my phone on silent. Hold on, please. It wasn't your phone. It really was my phone. So he sent me a link to one of my favorite people that I love watching on YouTube. Her name is Mel Robbins, and she tells people lots of good stuff. And I love the emails that she sends out, I think on a weekly basis. I don't read them on a weekly basis, but at the end of each of her emails, it says, and if anyone hasn't told you today, I love you, I believe in you, and I don't know, something else that always makes me cry because it's just so very sweet. So without further ado, I'm gonna go into tonight's topic. And as we warn you always, when I am having to move things on the screen, you know, hopefully I won't end the stream prematurely and we'll get through this without me dropping everybody. So with that, tonight's topic, 8 things Mel Robbins said. The name of the podcast is 8 Things to Tell Yourself Every Morning, and it is on her YouTube, Mel Robbins Podcast. Let me see if I can make this work. I did. I'm so excited. So here are the 8 things that she talks about and to tell yourself every morning. Now, this is about an hour and a half thing. So obviously we're not going to do all of that, but you can go check her out for sure. So no matter the weather, here's the thing. Every morning, not just when you feel like it, not just when you want to, not when you, you know, everything is just sunshine, whether it's raining or snowing or, you know, tornadoes, rainbows, all of that. And remember, rainbows can only come when it rains in the sun. Wake up every morning and choose to say, "Today is going to be a great day." You get to choose no matter what, no matter what the weather, no matter what life is throwing at you. Every day you wake up is a blessing. So wake up, say, "Today is going to be a great day," and continue on. Then We're going to go on and say one more thing, which is something cool is going to happen to me today because it is possible. This is just by saying it out loud. Yes. And yes, you are all saying this out loud, by the way, allows your brain to really hear it and primes your mind for the opportunity for something cool to happen today. Now, DJ's watching the chat. I am not. But if you want, put number 2 and tell me something cool that happened today. My coolness this morning was I didn't get out of bed till like almost 7:30, which is like significant sleeping in. So that was pretty awesome. And I got to do a bunch of stuff today and it is fun. All right. So number 1, 2, now on to number 3. Ready? Are you ready for it? I know you're all ready. Drum roll, please. No matter what happens, I can handle it. That's it. Whether you've got all aces in your best poker hand, and I don't know if y'all love my little getting hit by a car thing, no matter what happens, I can handle it. Because some days we get up and we're like, I can't handle it. And if you say that to yourself, you're going to be right. So We want to make sure that when we talk to ourselves first thing in the morning, that we want to make sure we know we can handle it, because guess what? You handled it yesterday, you handled it today, you're going to be able to handle it tomorrow. Okay, next thing you're going to say to yourself: an exciting new chapter in my life is starting today. Every day can be the best day of your life, because yesterday may have been stinking awesome. However, today could be even more awesome because this day has never happened before. And because it's never happened before, it can be the best day of your life because no matter how awesome yesterday was. All right, now I'm just going to say this, look you right in the eyes before we go on to, you know, number 5, because I know I sometimes might have a small challenge with this. And from talking to some of you guys offline, I know some of you may also have a challenge with number 5. But before we get there, I just want to look in the eye and say, you're not alone if number 5 rings a little bit truer for you. Are y'all ready?

Okay.

Whether you're ready or not, here we go. Kind of like hide and seek. I need to give myself more credit for how hard I am trying. So, and Mr. Ballinger, I'm totally talking to you right now, 'cause you know I'm talking to you right now, that little dude pushing the boulder, the, you know, I love my little donut, stop trying over in the corner. Hard work pays off. All of us are doing the best we can with the tools and skills that we have. We have to remember that we are doing the best that we can, and I need to give myself more credit for how hard I am trying. The harder you try to be good, the better it is for you to understand number 6. So after you've told yourself, I need to give myself more credit for how hard I am trying, I also am allowed to be a work in progress, right? So perfection is the lowest standard. We've talked about this in the past, right? Perfection is the lowest standard because no matter how good you are at something, there's always that little bit more that you could do, right? So for those of us who want to have the perfect office setup, the perfect classroom setup, the perfect kitchen, the perfect basement, perfect reloading room, whatever it is, remember perfection is the lowest standard and it's okay to be a work in progress. Number 7, if I keep showing up, life will reward me. Consistency over time always wins. And some days you don't feel like you're just around the corner from the next thing that's going to matter or make a difference, but generally you really are, no matter what your project is. And remember, huh, number 6, what did we just say? You're allowed to be a work in progress. And that's why if I keep showing up, life will reward me. And number 8, this— okay, yeah, back to, uh, hold on again, I have to move things. This is going to be another one of those I'm looking at in the eyeballs here, right? Number 8. Now when I made the slide, I'm like, am I going to cry when I put on number 8? Maybe. Hard to say. Hasn't happened yet. We don't know. However, each and every one of you, even if you say this one day, I will be so proud of you. I mean, I'm proud of you anyway because you come and support me and I love that. So that's awesome. But you have something special to contribute to the world, and that is actually exactly what number 8 is. Repeat after me: I have an important contribution to make to the world. And you know it's true, and simply having good attitude changes the world. Repeat after me again: I have an important contribution to make to the world. Now, some of us have a harder time believing this than others, but I want to tell you it is true. All right, so what's next? DJ is going to be getting ready to do roll call. However, before we get to the roll call, what is next? Uh, when you get to watch the replay, when this posts back up, you can go through here, write the sayings down in your own handwriting, post them where you see them every morning, and try it for a bit, one day at a time. No perfection needed, just try it, believe that it can make a difference. And then, how cool is that? Thank you so much for coming. All right, with that, that is it. That was it. That was the whole presentation. So, Mr. DJ, you got that roll call? And then we'll find out what comments I'm supposed to pay attention to, because I'll go back to looking at those.

I do have that list, and wow, you did run through that really quickly. I almost feel like you should do this twice in order to meet some, some minimum. But joining us this evening, last in the room, was Mark Thomas first.

Oh no, we're not done. I'm sorry, I don't want you to think that we're done. You're just doing roll call. We got more.

Right on. Uh, so Crabby Turtle was in here first. Mike Ballinger came in next. We got Sariafan93 out in the room. 2LiveMoo is part of the crew. Hillbilly Up is out there, so is Ozzy Orsbourn. Gizzard Gary and Taren Gomez are— and Patriot in the Dark 1775 just got in the room, so welcome Patriot and everyone else.

Awesome. All right, so yeah, no, dude, we're not done done. It was just— that was my quick thing. So yeah, that is a whole hour plus of a podcast. Um, oh wait, ready? This is where we get to talk about failure is, um, how I failed forward today. But all right, DJ, uh, are there any starred comments? There are two starred comments.

Okay, one of them is mine.

One of them is yours.

Yeah, because you had said, uh, you know, put in, you know, star number 2 and then tell us something good that happened today. So my— that was my something good happening today, that it snowed. And it still is. Not everyone is considering that to be a good thing right now though, I gotta say.

I like it for sure, without a doubt. Um, we were out in the hot tub this morning with my husband, my husband and I, and, uh, we're having just little tiny flurries. Supposedly on Tuesday we're gonna get snow, and I'll be very excited if we get snow when days, because lately in New England we've been having mud season. Not so awesome.

I think that more people would enjoy the snow if more people had hot tubs.

There could be that. There could be that. Yes, we were discussing whether or not the, the flurries that were coming down were just because steam was going up and it was so cold, so it would just make flurries. So, all right, Ohio State beat Michigan today. Congratulations. I'm not a football person, but I'm sure that that's exciting. Um, and yeah, cool things can be so many different things to so many. I mean, I don't know, one of the things I get to walk out the back of my house and look over the woods and over the valley and the sky and the snow— or sorry, in the— yeah, the trees and all of that sort of stuff. So it's pretty cool. Um, yes, Mr. Jamie, as far as I know, everyone had a fabulous Thanksgiving. Um, oh, Ozzy's got snow as well. Again, I am jealous. I, I miss it. Like I said, hopefully, fingers crossed, on Tuesday we get, uh, snow. And I'm not even in school anymore, so I'm not even hoping like for a snow day. But, um, there is all of that. And I know somebody else came in and said, did you miss it? I'm like, well, you missed a thing. Um, I did have a quick, uh whatever that's called, slideshow. And so, oh, oh yeah, so I was going to talk about, because Taryn is here too. So Taryn and I made each other laugh today, or at least I'm pretty sure we did. We're just texting, sometimes hard to say, but I'm pretty sure we were laughing. So let's talk about failure also, because that lovely little slideshow, as much as DJ says we should go over again, um, number one, you can watch the replay, give me a thumbs up when you do all of that. But tonight, because I'm in the office trying to clean and I'm trying to not clean because it's just so annoying to clean, um, I made the slideshow and then I decided how cool would it be if you missed it but you'd like to have your own version of it. So how did I fail? Well, I downloaded it and— plenty of snow in Miami, that doesn't seem— sorry. Um, sorry, I just saw Abigail's thing. I'm like, is that for real? Um, I didn't— that's— that seems odd, but okay. That's not where I'd expect it. Um, so that slideshow, I downloaded it and I printed it thinking I would print out postcard-sized things, right? But no, I printed it out in regular actual big one, one page per, per slide. So if you want to get your very own copy of this, I can send it to you, um, because I printed it out by accident, kind of, sort of. Like, I meant to print it out, but I didn't mean to make— print it out this big. So if you want a big one so you're not writing it in your own hands, but you have all the pictures you can let me know. And DJ, maybe this is something you can help me with. I don't know how to— oh, I can just put up my email and people can send me their, their addresses, right, if they want a copy. So I printed out really big. So if you want a big copy, I've got one of these already. And then I'm like, okay, let me figure out how to make a smaller copy. So I figured that out, and apparently it's so small that I already lost it. Because it was half the size of these and it was so cute. I'm so sad I'm not going to get to show you, but what happened was I said, okay, let's make this smaller, and I made it smaller and I put 4 on there. Ended up being about this big. So those of you have really, really good eyesight, you can get an itty-bitty copy of these slides, um, the 8 things to tell yourself every morning. And then I figured out the size I actually wanted. So if you want to cut them up, I have them smaller, and then I even have them on actual postcards. So, um, and yes, Mr. Mark Thomas hits it. Every day is a gift. That's why I call— they call it the present. Um, I do love that quote. Um, it's okay, Viejo, we still love you. I'm sure you were build— building things or something like that, or going jogging or hiking, or all of the things that you do out there on the West Coast. And it's still light out there as far as I know. Um, but anyway, so yes, if anybody wants them, uh, let me know, uh, and we'll put an email up there. So what I do— and if nobody wants them, that's okay too. But what I will do is I will probably take these little guys and I will stick them along my mirror, and then I will send y'all a picture. I will post it up probably on Facebook and/or YouTube because that's where I go the most. So for those of you who are showing up late, oh yes, that's what I'll do. I'll do what DJ said. We'll do a quick, quick fast review. Ready? 8 things to tell yourself every morning no matter what the weather, since that's why we got talking about the whole Oh, oh, sorry. Well, Viejo has a good reason for being late because he was eating leftovers. And of all the things to do on the weekend after Thanksgiving, eating leftovers is absolutely one of the most important things. So, 8 things to tell yourself every morning. Ready? Probably gonna make a mess. Today is going to be a great day. Something cool is gonna happen to me today. No matter what happens today, I can handle it. I do love this. This cracks me up. It does, because some days do we not feel like that? Um, my little guy getting hit by a car, but I figure in this crew, you know, we all have some sense of humor on all that. An exciting new chapter in my life is starting today. 'Cause every day is a new day that has never been before. I need to give myself more credit for how hard I am trying. And I think the pictures are pretty self-explanatory. I'm allowed to be a work in progress. Perfection is the lowest standard. If you ever have a problem with that quote, just go talk to Tony Robbins. If I keep showing up, life will reward me. And consistency over time always does win. And the most important at the end, number 8. And number 8, it happens to be my favorite number too, so how cool is that? I have an important contribution to make to the world, and simply having good attitude changes the world. If you go on and you get to see the Mel Robbins— oh no, good Lord, what did I do now? Hold on, please. I can't see anything. Um, if you go watch the Mel Robbins podcast, she talks about how it's like, if all you do is be nice to the barista who makes your coffee, if all you do is smile at someone and say hi, or like Taryn, you just randomly text somebody and say, hey, how you doing? Or Mike, or all of you guys who reach out to me from time to time. Oh wait, there's no barbecue out there. Barbecue. Uh, we went to Tamarack Armory when we went to visit him, when we just randomly drove out to Niagara Falls and then stopped to see Barbecue on the way home. So anyway, there you have it. Now, DJ, now I'm actually done. So see, I did the review like you said, and I said this was going to be the leftovers and random stuff. So what you got? What do you think? Anything to add? Oh, I missed a, a, what do you call that? You got squirrels.

Yes, on behalf of Barbecue, I put that in.

Okay, I appreciate you. Yeah, I know, I was like, I meant to bug Barbecue, be like, you got to be there, I'm wearing your, the sweatshirt I got while I was out there. But all righty, yes, enjoying life. Sorry, I saw the last one you starred, I just missed it till now. Enjoy life, everyone. It is an amazing journey with its ups and downs. All right, DJ, you got a favorite number that we went over, 1 through 8, or not so much?

Well, my favorite number is 3. Okay, my favorite presentation number was probably the second one.

Okay, uh, something cool is gonna happen to me today. See, I have to look at my notes.

Okay, because you have to also keep your eyes out or you might miss it kind of thing, like for real. Yeah, because cool stuff happens all the time. It's just how perceptive are we to what's going around depending on how buried under or mired into our own mess we are. But there's cool stuff every day.

There is, and you're right, it is about noticing it. Um, I know in the summertime I will like lay down on the lawn and I'll literally— I'm not watching grass grow, but like I'll watch how grass actually moves, and then like little tiny bugs running around and stuff like that, and just like how amazing the world is from the smallest little insect that's on the ground to, you know, the birds flying overhead. It is pretty cool.

It's also sometimes that minutia is the degree that's required to get me to this, the state of distraction that my current issues require. Like, I really have to get into something, really have to be buried into it so far that I'm not being distracted by anything in my environment, um, else my mind will work its way back to whatever it is that's bugging me. So sometimes there'll be— well, right now 4 devices are live. I mean, that's because I'm doing a live right now, but were I not, I would still have 3 devices going, listening to 2 things, and researching or playing a game on a third and having another one left in reserve, because some days the stuff really is got you wedged in that deep or that tight.

Yeah, without a doubt. It's, uh, and everyone— and the different things will catch us, right? I know, um, you know, I think of Jamie whenever I think of the Bible verses and stuff like that. I, um It's like Ozzy's journey to make more holsters, and someday his original Oz holsters will be worth lots of money. Everyone's allowed to have their delusions, and it may not be a delusion. It could be maybe that is what you have to offer to the world. You never know. Um, but, and, and, you know, Abigail, for those of you who don't know what RBF is, go look it up. I'm sure you'll find it. Um, It is sort of funny to me, there are people that I've met that have spectacular RBF and they are the nicest, sweetest people in the world. So even if somebody looks cranky, you can smile at them, see what happens. You never know, it may not be that bad. So, all right, sir, with that, would you like to take us out?

Not before pointing out what Mark has put out there in the text chat, because that's a quote that I will put in every once in a while into chats. And it's from Ferris Bueller. It's, life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you might miss it.

It actually—

that's the truth.

That when you said it, actually, I'm like, oh yeah, I was totally thinking about that favorite quote from that movie.

Let's see. And Chasing Ghosts— I didn't do all that great a job making sure that I had gotten everybody last weekend in another chat that I was on during the week, and I feel really bad about that. So I'm making sure that I give every last person who entered. And the last person to join us tonight, not the least, was Chasing Ghosts is out there tonight. So was PAO2A. Abigail Sorcha Finnegan was in the room. Jamie JH586 out there celebrating. Patriot in the Dark 1775 is out there, so is Mark Thomas, Taren Gomez, Gizzard Gary, Ozzy Osbourne, Hillbilly Up, who's got a show coming up, 2 Live Moo, Sariafan93, Mike Bellinger, and the Crabby Turtle all joined us this evening. And there were others that were just listening in. Um, thanks for stopping by, everybody. I hope that everybody had that safe and happy holiday that we all want to have every year. And that you come back next week and maybe bring a friend. And so until we see each other again, be safe, have fun, take care of yourself and your crew, and rock! We're out.