Mental Health Matters - from the backyard

Welcome to Mental Health Matters, brought to you every Saturday night by A Great Start Shooting School since 2018. Well, and on some Sundays because life does not go according to plan. Hello, my friends. Why are we here? Well, because we know 2 out of every 3 gun deaths are suicide. And if we're looking to save lives, we definitely want to talk about suicide prevention if 60% of gun deaths are suicides, we should be definitely focusing on that. So let's talk about mental health. As you look out over the backyard here, what does this make you think of as far as mental health goes? Well, for me, it gets to remind me of how blessed I actually am. Here is the view from my hot tub in my backyard, and I'm hoping you can kind of hear the birds in the background a little bit here and there. Okay, I did not know— I actually just learned this the other day— the sounds of birds happen to relax us and make us calm because they indicate in the natural world that everything is good. And it's one of these things, I guess most of us probably know this, because you know when a storm is coming. It's quiet. Like, too quiet. It doesn't just happen in the movies. It is in for real. So. Um. How is your morning? What does your morning start like? Well, today it's actually lovely. And I am not at the gym, which honestly, normally around this time I'm sort of headed there. And I get to start my morning like this instead. Oh, the azaleas are in bloom over there. Hold on, let me see if I can get you both colors, because right now you can only see the purple. And then there's pink over there, and I'm gonna put this on the edge of the thing, and hopefully I'm not gonna drop it in the hot tub, because, well, you know, that would be sad. Oh, there we go. So we have full bloom, and yes, that is a treehouse. How cool is that? People love our treehouse. I'm like, well, everybody likes our treehouse better than our kids did. All right, so mental health matters. Everything that we do, everything that we say is part of our mental health. The things that we say to ourselves, the things that we say to others, the way we treat ourselves, the way we treat others, all of these things are what matters to your everyday life, because you are the person who talks to yourself the most. So for example, here I am getting ready to hop on a plane going to Michigan, Lansing actually. And when you guys are watching this, or if you're watching the replay, I'm either already there or I've been there. And what did I do to prepare for this trip? Well, absolutely nothing. It is, uh, let's see, I've got about 4 hours before I have to leave for the trip. Am I packed? No. Do I know what I'm wearing? No. Is it a formal wedding? Yes. So my mental health is like, oh my gosh, what are you doing relaxing and not doing anything? I'm like, well, I am enjoying listening to the birds. I am enjoying this lovely blue sky. Oops, sorry, try not to give you my fingers. And we've had so much rain lately, and unfortunately rain and depression do actually come hand in hand. And the weather is something that your mental health has to be aware of as well. Some people suffer much worse than others when it comes to that sort of thing. So if I could give you one little tip for this weekend, it is go outside, enjoy some nature, and listen to the birds first thing in the morning because they actually help reduce your stress. Because this bird song for eons has made us realize that it is safe. When it's too quiet, when there is no noise, there is no wind, everything is waiting for the next thing to happen. Like when a bad weather storm comes in, whether it's tornadoes or hurricanes or any of that, because we were just talking about how for New England this is our hurricane season, and I know it's way worse down in Florida for those of you down there. Sorry about that. But just to think about the simple things in life. Now, if you live in the city, I apologize. I can't do anything for you. But even the city has birds, right? If nothing else, you've heard a pigeon coo from time to time. But our happiness is outside. And so I bring you my backyard. For these few moments to have a short abbreviated Mental Health Matters because, well, I'm not here. I mean, I am here on the video, but you know what I mean. So I don't get to say hi to Abigail and my favorite pink hand waving Mr. Krabby Turtle and G Webs, who is generally one of my biggest ever cheerleaders for getting me on YouTube and getting me to stay here. And it's not as much fun when it's not bidirectional here, where I get to say hi to all you guys. However, I am relatively confident DJ is out there and he's in the comments, and if you have questions or you want answers, he's got them. He's also putting up links for areas to get you help. So if you happen to tune in tonight for your first time and you are here on Mental Health Matters, know that our goal is to have resources for you. 911 if you're actually in significant crisis, 211 if you just need someone to talk to. Um, locally on many states it's 211, and now as of last year or the year before, uh, 988 is the new crisis hotline. So we always want to know that we have resources. Now here's the other thing about resources. They're only worthwhile if we utilize them. And most of us don't even think to utilize them. As my mom is getting further into dementia, I am trying to get better about actually utilizing resources around me because none of us can do it all. And the more we reach out, The more we give people the opportunity to actually help us, then the more we can be better. Because here's the thing, I know most of you guys out there, you are all helpers. You would do something for somebody else in a heartbeat. All you need is someone to ask you and you will hop up and take care of whatever it is that they need. Uh, Hillbilly's probably out there, goodness knows. He's helped folks, whether it's raising money or awareness to help folks in need, medical bills, that sort of thing. Sorry about that, folks. I have a wee bit of a cold that's been kind of niggling at me all week, and this morning it decided to come out full force, because you know, getting on a plane with a cold is gonna be awesome. But right about now, I should be at the wedding dancing with my husband, so I'm sure I feel better by now. Yeah, giving you the tour of the backyard as I'm chatting. And you know, we're gonna stop out there because then you're gonna just look at the garbage can because that's what's over here. But yeah, appreciating all that we have. Sometimes we have a lot, sometimes we have little, sometimes the stuff we have is just pain and suffering. My mom is headed out to California next month, and she's dealing with her own stuff with the dementia and stuff, but she has a friend of hers who is dying, and we have to deal with that. I know last week we talked about death and grief because it was Memorial Day weekend, and disease is similar to that, where we end up You know, cancer is the one that comes to mind all the time that, you know, people get it, they know that they're on their way out, but they don't know when. Our friend in California has health issues. I'm not gonna get into all that, but the reality of it is each day is all that we have. This moment right now while you're watching this, I want to thank you for taking the time to be here and possibly learn something that will help you. And it's one of those things where gratitude really is the key to happiness. Whether you have a penny, a dollar, $100, a million dollars, if you're grateful, you are going to be happier. If you are not grateful, it's never going to be enough. And I am blessed to have friends from all stratas of life. People who are lucky to have a dollar or less. I have friends that have stupid amounts of money, and stupid is a relative term, just so we're clear. But this is why comparison can kill you. One of my favorite lessons from Tony Robbins is constant and never-ending improvement. Because here's the thing, and I teach this all the time in my gun classes, no matter where you are, you can always get better. No matter where you are, you could always be worse. So when it's the darkest day, when it's the worst day possible, when you lost that kitten or that parent or that friend, it's like this is where the words of the Bible, or at least where I believe they came from, 'this too shall pass,' helps. Because here's the thing: if it's something awesome and amazing, like, I don't know, getting to look at— sorry, I got to keep putting my finger in front of there— you know, this lovely view, these pretty flowers in my backyard, knowing that yes, my kids did play in that treehouse, but they weren't as interested in it as everybody else who comes to visit. And, you know, what we have is fleeting. We are not promised tomorrow, so we really need to be grateful for stuff that we have today, whether it's that easy breath that you just took without thinking about it. Oh, wait a second, let me see if I can get the mama bird for you. All right, so over here, and I don't know if you can see her, but We have a mom bird who unfortunately has built a nest right over our— our light right outside our door, so every time we come out, she leaves her nest. But there she is. And my husband's worried about her because she gets stressed, or assumes she's stressed because we're always out here and she's always leaving her nest, but anyway, noticing the little things in life. Anything you have is only temporary. The happiness and the sadness. And the constant and never-ending improvement is, well, if it's really good, let's make it great. If it really sucks, let's let it go, appreciate the lesson that the suckage is trying to teach us, and continue on knowing that the it is only temporary. Watching some kind of movie the other day, a person was about to get tortured and there was another person in the room with them and the person in the room apparently can handle torture and said, "Just remember, it's only pain. It will pass." And I guess the short version of this is when things suck, when it hurts, Realize this is temporary. Thank the pain for coming and teaching you whatever lesson you need. Like for me right now, if I step the wrong way, well, you know, that means my knee hurts, and that's reminding me that yes, I do have to prepare for surgery and get my knee fixed, which is definitely not something I want to do. However, you guys will get a lot more video then. Okay, so mental health matters. Here is the short version of today. If you're just tuning in, thanks for coming in. I know DJ's over there in the chat on YouTube, because if you're not on YouTube, um, if you're on Facebook, you're not gonna see the chat. So head over to YouTube and, um, drop your links for those of you who are administrators. Go ahead and put links to your channels. Gwebs, if you're out there, Barbecue, if you're out there, Hillbilly, Jamie, Abigail, I don't even know if you have a YouTube channel. Oh, and yes, I meant to say Abigail last week said nice nails and I just want to let you know that my husband wanted sky blue, so that's where the nails came in. But thank you for noticing. I talk to DJ often, I'm like, yeah, I know that my life is somewhat together because my nails are done. And it's stuff like that where you have your thing. Whatever your thing is, go do it. I don't know if Tara's out there, but Tara Smith's Kitchen, you know, I love listening to her cook. I'm jealous and I'm off amazed and happy that she can cook the way that she does and share that with us. And be thankful for your talents. I mean, Hillbilly, he's at the top of the hour, so go check out Hillbilly's channel. 'Cause, you know, his whole goal is make somebody's day better. And when we make somebody else's day better, we're definitely making our own day better. So there are just so many things that you and I can do, as I've told you guys in the past. When I'm feeling like crap, that is when I tend to pay the most attention to helping others, because helping others is how we can take care of ourselves sometimes. And there's the lovely fire pit. Go light a fire this weekend. It is super fun to— we had s'mores this weekend and it was just lovely. So I keep saying so like I'm going to end, but it's 15 minutes in and for those of you who are just joining, thanks again. Um, DJ has gotten better about getting me to remind these things, but you know, hit that like button, share, bring a friend, all that sort of stuff. And who knows, maybe the wedding doesn't go as late as I think and I'll be over there in the comments with you. Anything is possible. And yes, at some point in the future we will get a new intro that will not get us kicked off YouTube. So with that, Light a fire. Enjoy the life. Be thankful for everything, whether it's good or bad, because it's there for a reason. Know that it's temporary. Appreciate the pain. Let go of it. And then enjoy the joy.