Mental Health Matters - Where is your happiness found?
In this live‑stream, host Brooke Cheney (Speaker A) leads a casual yet heartfelt discussion on mental health, suicide prevention, and personal well‑being, especially within the firearms community. She opens by linking the high proportion of gun‑related deaths to suicide and argues that addressing mental health is essential for both saving lives and reducing violence. The conversation weaves together several strands: the damaging impact of social‑media validation on youth, the unique survivor‑guilt and isolation experienced by veterans, and the importance of community bonds among gun owners. Cheney emphasizes inner peace and self‑validation, citing a biblical passage (Isaiah 41:12) and a “Charge of the Goddess” prayer to illustrate that true happiness must be cultivated internally. She frames self‑talk as a form of spell‑casting, urging listeners to replace negative self‑statements with affirmations and gratitude. Practical coping tools are shared – breathing exercises while shooting ("lead therapy"), mag‑dumps, and reframing questions like “what’s good about this?” – alongside personal anecdotes about family loss, relationship break‑ups, and daily journaling on social platforms. The co‑host DJ provides roll‑call, light banter, and occasional prompts, while the chat contributes personal updates. Overall, the stream blends serious mental‑health guidance with community camaraderie, aiming to empower participants to find inner happiness, support one another, and reduce suicide risk.
Chapters
I promise I'll stop. Hello everyone, um, nice to see you all out here. Uh, it is Mental Health Matters and it's Saturday, formerly known as Suicide Prevention Saturday. And after all these years, maybe someday I will stop saying that, but right now I still have to do it because I was on G Webb's chat just earlier this week— or no, Coop. Coop is out there. Um, I was on his thing and I told told him it was on Sundays. So no, it is Saturday night, it is live, it's 9 PM on a Saturday, and we are here. Why? For the same reason we come here every week. Because 2 out of every 3 gun deaths you hear about are suicides. And if we truly want to help save lives, we need to talk about mental health. Because not only will we save the life of those, or at least possibly prevent them from taking their lives, those who do it with a firearm. We can also positively impact anyone who's having a hard time, mental health struggles, etc. And in addition to that, of course, is the fact when you do these things, take care of people's mental health, you also impact the ability to reduce violence in our society. So it's a win-win, and nobody's, uh, gonna argue. Actually, I wish that were true because I go to the Capitol in Hartford, here in Connecticut, in DC. And they do argue because they say, oh, that's too hard. And I'm like, yeah, that's why we have to do it. Because if we don't do something, nothing's going to happen. If nothing happens and you just keep signing little bills that give us more regulations that don't actually help people, here we go. So anyway, hope you're all having a wonderful week. Uh, nice to see you all chatting out there in the, um, the side chat. DJ is going to be watching that and say, uh, give you all a hello shortly. Um, I, on the other hand, am going to not look at the chat for a little bit because I got my handy-dandy DJ here with me. He will star stuff for me as I need to, uh, put stuff up and that sort of thing. So, um, Saturday night, hope you're all having a wonderful time. I appreciate you taking the time to come hang out. Water, vodka, you decide. I'm not telling. So anyway, all right, tonight is Mental Health Matters. And what did I put in here? I'm like looking for others to build us up. I have notes. Y'all are in trouble whenever I have notes, uh, hence I have to not look at the chat. However, like I said, DJ's gonna be watching it. He will let me know when there is stuff I need to do. And of course, you know, oh, look at him. See, he's pushing buttons and stuff. So let's talk about our mental health. What have you done this week to take care of yourself? Here we are. I keep looking over here and I still have a 19— or a 1995 calendar. Wow. Okay. I don't have a 2025 calendar put up yet. I do have a 2025 calendar. I just keep forgetting to put it up. So anyway, second week, third week, second week, and we're under 14, so this is only the second week of January. So beginning of the year, people start thinking about new beginnings on the first of the year generally. Even if we don't make any New Year's resolutions or anything like that, we do tend to reflect in on that, what I'm going to do this year to make it better than last year. Now it doesn't mean that last year had to suck. It just means that tomorrow has the ability to be the best day of your life yet. And then the day after that can be a little bit better. And the day after that can still be a little bit better. So today can be the best day of your life. And then tomorrow could be that much more better, that much more better. I do not think that is proper grammar. So anyhow, grammar aside, you get the idea. So we are social creatures, right? You and I like interacting, and that's why you guys are here. You're here, you're in the chat, wherever that is. I don't know which way it looks when you're— but anyway, for me it's over there. So, um, chatting, connecting with people, we are social creatures. However, if you look in the chat, one of the things that is in there— not the chat, I'm sorry, in the description, right? So let's see, Facebook, it's up there. YouTube is down there. In Isaiah 41:12, the Bible speaks about seeking those who are against you and not finding them, which can be interpreted as a metaphor, inner peace and resolution. So we are going to talk today about inner peace, because that which we do not find in ourselves, we cannot find it without, which happens to be a part of a prayer, "If that which you seek, you find that within yourself, you will never find it without," um, called from— in its prayer called The Charge of the Goddess. And here's the thing, so often in life we are looking for validation from others, and sadly this is part of where suicide actually comes with. I was talking with my students today and we were talking about the last 10 years and really now it's about 15, where the largest growth— and this is not a growth market that we want— but the largest growth in suicide is in our preteens and our teenagers. And that need to get validation from others, this lovely thing called social media, has exacerbated that. Because just as awesome as you guys are here for being here, chatting in the side, saying hi to each other, all that sort of stuff, it can also be used as a horrible tool and weapon, especially to our young minds and to our young children who are looking for that acceptance into our society. And the challenge is, is when they're beat down, they can't turn it off. And for those of you who know, like, I, I think I saw Mark Thomas before I switched over. Um, so he's a teacher, Coop's a teacher, um, I don't know who else is here that's a teacher, but anyway, the idea is we were all kids, we don't have to be teachers. We know being a kid is hard, and part of us being part of a community is that we need acceptance from one another. However, our true happiness needs to be within ourselves, because if we are not the people that we want to be— i.e., kind, nice, smart, talented, right? These are the things that we want to be because that helps us be accepted in our our society, but we have to believe in ourselves first before others will. So see, I gotta look at my notes here. Realizing that you are amazing is one of the harder pills for most of us to swallow because we are with ourselves all day long, every day, even when we're sleeping, because we know some of those dreams are just messed up, but We know all of our good traits, and that's usually what other people see, right? You'll see people on social media, and all they ever share with you is the awesome stuff, and that's no one's real life. Like, everybody has good days, everyone has bad days, and that is the real thing. But we look at other people through, like, these rose-colored glasses and be like, oh, Look at Hillbilly. He does all this video. He does all this editing. He is so amazing. He can do all this stuff and he's got a full-time job and I can't even get close. And this is our challenge when we start comparing ourselves to others is we look at just the stuff they produce and the stuff that they do and say, ooh, good job. They're better than me because I suck at that thing. Someday I might edit video, but let's not get crazy this year. So if all I did was compare myself to others, I could very easily make myself feel smaller and smaller and smaller. When we're talking about our suicide population, right, unfortunately most of us know the largest chunk of that are our veterans. And why is that? Well, let's see, survivor's guilt, right? They go, they watch someone get blown up or die they feel guilty for surviving. And then all of a sudden they come back here, they're lost in that they had their family and then their family got taken away. Not their blood family, their military family. Because, um, Mario and I have talked about this, lots of vets have talked about this. And now they come home and they're a little bit— it's more challenging. So trying to fit in when they had such a tight-knit group and now they don't. Not so much fun. However, we're all like that at some scale or level. Hence, what are we here? Most of us own guns, are gun people, are part of the gun community. So we have that thing that ties us together. Of course. Ready, everybody? Just put your hand on your heart. Wait, do I have a pulse? Yeah, I do. Okay, you got a pulse? Okay, we have that in common. So everyone you meet— and this is one of the things I love about Coop, because Coop always says, hey sister, how you doing? And if we could think of that more often— hey brother, hey sister— regardless of who you're talking to, get that thing that we are connected to everyone. With that, DJ, I am guessing— it looks like the chat is kind of busy over there. Um, but would you like to say hi to everybody for me?
Be happy to do that. It's like the best part of the show for me is the first announcement. So here's my gig out there tonight. C&T Designs and Arms, uh, previously mentioned and out there in the crowd waving. Hey, Crabby Turtles out there, so is Kisser Gary. Sorry if I had 93. He's joined us tonight. 2 Live Moo is out in the crowd. Hillbilly Up is out there too, so is Mark Thomas Gun Websites. Fiona's out there. Rock Abigail Sorcha Fitton is the last person in the room, and that's the roll call for now. Everybody, uh, hey, share out the live and, uh, thumb it up.
Awesome. All right, I'm not touching buttons. You're gonna touch a button? Okay. Yeah, I don't know if y'all remember the shortest live ever. That was me and DJ pushing the wrong buttons at the same time, I think. Um, So anyway, thank you all for joining us. And, um, words. So we all have stuff in common. We all are part of the same, uh, group as far as we're all human. Now, most of us have insecurities, most of us have ego, uh, and we have varying amounts of it. It is very easy to beat ourselves up and do miserable self-talk to ourselves. Last week or the week before, Abigail was talking about ravens and crows and the difference of Valhalla versus the Morgan. And the reason I bring that up is because that charge of the goddess, for that which you seek, you find that within yourself, you'll never find it without, is part of the whole idea of the goddess thing, is that you were in your mother's womb when your mother was in your grandmother. So there's this never-ending circle of life, and your ancestors are with you and all of that fun stuff. And wow, magic and casting spells— that's where I was going. Okay, finally. Sorry, I'm like, what did I do? So every time you say something to yourself, you are actually casting a spell on yourself. Because what we say, we believe. I'm sure you guys have all heard the thing, if you say a lie long enough and loud enough that it becomes the truth, right? Unfortunately, you and I are the ones who are talking to ourselves the most, or fortunately, you and I are the ones talking to ourselves the most because we get to choose what we say, what spell we're casting, what prayer we're saying, what we're trying to manifest in our lives. And if we say, oh wow, I'm just a dumb gun bunny, well then if I say that long enough and hard enough, I will stay a dumb gun bunny. If I, however, say, wow, I know a lot about firearms, I can share this with other people and I can bless others with the knowledge that I have, which was the conversation DJ and I were having just before we started, because he's like, how's your day? And I'm like, I get to share with people the ability to have fun with guns. And so many people don't even understand that fun with guns is a thing. So my choice is to remember how I can bless people. And when I say the not so nice things to myself, to try to redirect myself back to the, what are the blessings in my life? What can I do that is good? This morning we woke up to this beautiful little snowfall here in New England, and it was totally that, you know, that snow globe snow. It's like just little flurries everywhere, right? And it was picture perfect, and it really gave me that feeling of today is a blessing and today is a present, right? It's because every day above ground is better than the ones below. So yeah, back to my— back to trying to stay on target. So what's the most important thing for you and I to realize? You and I can cast a spell for what our life looks like. You and I can say the prayers that give us the power to direct our focus. Now, is it easy? No. Just like any muscle, it takes time and energy to build that sucker up. Yeah, I'm working on my pull-ups this year. We'll see what happens. So that is my Mental Health Matters thought for today. If I say so one more time, I'm gonna like, um, so much for Toastmasters. I didn't learn much. But that's negative stinking thinking. So I am here because you guys are here, and so you guys are my blessing. Hopefully I am your blessing, and together if you pick one thing up, realize you have a choice for what you're focusing on. And when God or whomever you believe in throws something challenging in your path, do your best to ask the question, what's good about this? And I know you guys have heard this before, but when my sister was killed in a car accident, my mom came home from work that day and we agreed, we're like, okay, what's good about this? And my belief is if we can ask that question when we— she just lost her daughter, I just lost my baby sister— you should be able to get there. And it's okay if you fail the first time or the second time. I'm still working on getting better at it. But that redirection, that thought of today is a blessing because it's a present, it's a present from God, it's a present from the goddess, whatever your belief system is. And you are the narrator of your story. One of the things I realized in talking with people this week, for some reason we talked about suicide. In all of my— most of my gun classes— sorry, I'm pointing to my classroom— most of my gun classes, we do talk about suicide prevention because it's that important to me. And suicide is the most selfish thing in the world. Because it's the escape hatch. And when you're suicidal, ideally you think that you're better off without having to deal with all the pain and suffering that you're going through, or at least for the people I've talked to that haven't actually committed suicide, that is their thought process. So if we can grab a hold of those thoughts that are going through our heads thinking that we're that life is not worth it. And we can just grab a hold a little bit, just like get a little finger hold in there, you know, start prying that apart, be like, okay, how can I impact somebody's life positively today? How can I impact my life so I realize what a blessing and a miracle each beat of that heart actually is? So, Mr. DJ, I am not looking at anything. Oh, oh, yeesh, that's, that's rough, Saria. Um, breaking up with girlfriend over the holidays, but I just picked myself back up and started over again. So excellent for having to pick back up. And there's always place for grief, sadness, and all of that. It's not like you're not going to feel those things, but knowing you have to get up and keep moving, that is definitely Uh, very super important. My Twitter is kind of like my diary, pretty unhinged and full of random thoughts. I will have to go over there and find that. Um, sorry, Abigail. I don't— she's like, um, I have a Facebook page that I'm doing right now called The Unlikely Ninja where I'm putting in my workout log, so it's a little bit like my daily diary. But random thoughts are super important because we are good like that. "One of my students spoke to me in class for the first time this year with 2 weeks left in the second marking period. I was elated." Yeah, yeah, I was actually, um, talking with my daughter about this. When I first started hanging out with my husband, we were in college, and holy smokes, his dad does not talk. I think it was 3, maybe 6 months that I'd been going to the house on like a weekly basis and sitting around and chatting with his mom and his sister and his brother and stuff like that. And the first day that his dad said something to me, I'm like, oh, he talked to me. I must be cool or I must be accepted or something along those lines. So Mark, I get how you feel, man. I do. Spoken words are very powerful, verified by the Bible, so speak good into your life and others. Absolutely. And this is the thing, is like everybody understands things differently, but it's like I've always understood the golden rule, right? Do unto others as you wish done unto you. In some witchcraft they talk about everything you put out comes back threefold upon you, so it's just like it magnifies it a little bit more. It's like If you're a little bit of a jerk, you're gonna get 3 times as much jerkiness back to you. And saying a prayer is saying it out loud versus saying it in my head. Because if I just sit here, you know, put my hands together for a prayer and I say it silently, it is not the same as saying, dear Heavenly Father, I thank you for the gifts you've given us today and this wonderful fellowship that I get to do every Saturday. Because when I say it out loud, get goosebumps. I get to share it with you. It's not just me. I get to transfer my energy. Out loud is even more powerful. And this is where— sorry, I immediately thought of when you stub your toe. I don't know how many of you say things really loud and others just— I try not to because I try to ignore the fact that there's pain and suffering. Yes, today is a gift and that's why they call it the present. That is what I was trying to say before, but I just couldn't quite get that. And yeah, I'm grabbing one, DJ, so I don't click on anything. Because CNT, as far as if you have dark thoughts, just realize it's normal. Everyone has them. Yes. In the suicide prevention, I want to say NRP, whatever the suicide prevention programs that I've already studied, 80% of Americans surveyed, right? Because it's always not 80%. 80% surveyed said that 80% of them had thoughts of suicide at some point in their life because things can be overwhelming, too much, etc. and so forth. And dark thoughts aren't necessarily just suicide. They can be wishing someone else was dead, etc. and so forth. So, and yeah, everyone does have dark thoughts. The thing is, is to recognize them grab a hold of them, toss them. It's like, you're sad, you're mad, you're upset. Awesome. We're gonna feel all of that. Acknowledge it and be like, wow, that really sucked because I don't have a little sister anymore. But then what's good about this, asking those empowering thoughts— and I'm not saying like all of a sudden we're like, oh, this is great because she's gone now. No, that's not how that works. But you give your brain the opportunity to come up with something better. So, um, I, I, I'm sorry, I'm gonna grab another thing. DJ, uh, yeah, I would need Joe Pesci to narrate my life. That would be hysterical. If you get that, that deal, let me know. I'll be the first to buy a ticket, I promise. Um, all right, so the threefold law is a Wiccan thing. All right, yeah, I don't know enough about everything, so I just know that I've, I've seen the I've seen the bumper sticker, I guess, is the reality of it. But it's like that which you put out comes back threefold. And like I said, the golden rule of do unto others as you wish done unto you. And Abigail, as far as cuss like a sailor when I'm in pain makes things hurt less. Yeah, see, I do the opposite where it's like if I don't scream and yell like the way that I think that my body wants me to react, I just work on breathing and be like, okay, it's not that bad. And I talk myself out of it. Sort of like the other day, I was getting out of my car, I picked up my purse and the top wasn't shut and everything fell out onto the floor. And I'm like, wow, that's spectacular. And it was slightly sarcastic, but had I just gone off the pirate direction or the sailor direction, for me it helps to save those words for things that are actually really sucky. So, but Mark Thomas says that he also cusses like a sailor, but that's only if he spills his coffee. Now, I don't know if that's because that's caffeine abuse or because it got on your beautiful beard. I have no idea. So anyway, All right, Mr. DJ, play me that song. No, just kidding. You have to unmute yourself though. Don't do a hillbilly because we can't even see your lips moving.
I've never heard that one before.
I know. Well, you know, that's what you get for having the, uh, the moniker. But yeah, I can't help myself. You can't like not say Mr. DJ, play me that song if you've heard the song more than once, I think.
Right up, at least once it should happen with everybody, I guess. So that's, that's your one time.
That's it, I'm done. All right, well, I'll try to remember that. We'll see how that works though.
Right on. So, uh, tonight joining us, uh, Jason Ghost, Abigail Sorcha Finnegan was here, so was Fiona. Gun Websites in the room. Mark Thomas is out there. Hillbilly Up, 2 Live Moo, Soraya Fan 93, User Gary's out there. Grabby Turtle joined us and so did C&T Designs. And arms. I got to see what the man has to say on the way out. He says, do not underestimate the therapeutic value of a mag dump as long as you're in the right place.
I will say the place for everything. Yeah, I'm like, when I'm having a bad practice day, that's usually when the mag dump occurs. Um, we do call it lead therapy for real. But here at Great Start Shooting School, for the most part, I help people work on their breathing and breathing while they're shooting, because most of us hold our breath when we're shooting.
So, and as that will do with most of us, I think that anything that can bring you that sort of smile is a good place to start.
And, uh, then Mark's other one: 30 rounds in seconds will make your grin no matter what. And it's true, no doubt.
Been there, want to be back again.
Yeah, and it's like one of those things too, it's like we had a machine gun event here last year, and it is absolutely fun. And I have some videos. I don't remember if I put them up on YouTube or not, but hey, there is— I mean, and that's why, like, you and I were talking before the show started briefly about how my day is, and I'm like, I am awesome because I get to do awesome things on a regular basis. And getting people to grin and smile just with one shot, like doing one thing they didn't think they could do And that is definitely my happy place. So what about you, DJ? What's your favorite thing?
My favorite thing? Wow, that, that's an on-the-spot thing. My favorite thing right now is this like really cold Diet Dr Pepper because I've forgotten to drink it during the show, and so I'm looking forward to that. That's my favorite thing right now.
Yes, there is no a favorite thing. There's My Favorite Things, the song, which I learned to sing to my little sister when she was wee child. So yeah, you should sing for us. You sing, right?
I'm not doing Sound of Music. I'm not taking requests for Sound of Music hits. But maybe the year-end karaoke program will get that.
Okay. All right. Yeah, no, actually, because Um, I don't know if I announced to you guys, uh, April we're going to Japan, and someone told me I have to sing karaoke in Japan. And just so y'all know, that's so probably not happening.
But Saturday Night Live? Yeah, a Saturday Night Live from a karaoke parlor. That would be right. All right, put your votes in the comments, leave a comment, bring a friend next time. And until we see everybody again, be safe. Have fun, take care of your crew and yourself, and rawr, we're out.
