Suicide Prevention Sat - We will talk about "IT"!

Oh, and poof, it says you are alive while I'm still looking at other things. Hello! First? No, fight me for it. All right, sorry. Um, well, let's see. Hello all, it is Saturday night. Um, and that would be Suicide French and Saturday. There we go. Uh, let's see, let's say hi to Tara and Guns and Barbecue GT3. Oh, GT3, you are here! Wait, where is it? Here it is. Dun dun dun, it finally arrived. I think it arrived yesterday because that's at least when I like said it arrived. So thank you for this. I've heard, um, it's going to be an interesting read. We'll see how this all goes. Uh, who else did I not say hi to yet? MK Joe, DJ, who sends me obnoxious texts from time to time. No, not really. Uh, he sends me reminders to make sure that I show up, so y'all can thank him a little bit. For me actually showing up on time, but not really. Um, but G-Webs, you got the first thumbs up, so there is that. I think I got everybody that has commented thus far, so here we go. All right, Suicide Prevention Saturday, because as a gun owner— oh wait, let me get rid of that for you. Oh wait, I got more. Hey Mike, see ya, glad to have you. Um, and hi Steven. And I missed something, I guess, apparently earlier. So, oh wait, CNT. See, I was trying so hard to like try to get through the roll call real fast. So anyway, Suicide Prevention Saturday, because 2 out of every 3 gun deaths you hear about are suicides. And if people really wanted to save lives, we'd be talking a lot more about mental health and a lot less about regulations. For those of you who checked in this afternoon while I was on the Second Amendment Foundation's weekly bullet update. Um, we did talk about that a little bit, is that anti-gunners want to talk about saving lives, and yet here we are, 60— over 60% of gun deaths are suicide. So I'm pretty sure we should be talking mental health and taking care of people who need help and taking care of ourselves. Ladies out there, I'm just going to say, as women, often we are the ones who are supposed to be the caregivers. And we often forget about take care of ourselves. So, um, that is something. So what do we talk about today? We talked about— we're going to talk about it, right? And the question is, what is it? Is it suicide? Is it suicide prevention? Is it mental health? Is it drug addiction and alcoholism. What is it for you? When you think about challenges in mental health, what do you think it is? So I know there's delay, so I have to wait a moment or two for y'all to roll call down what it might be. DJ and I were actually talking earlier tonight, or earlier today, I think it was after my students, but anyway, One of the things that's really hard, that is it, is how do you talk about this with someone? I've had some of you reach out to me and say, hey, I'm worried about so-and-so in my family or my friends, and I don't know what to do. And we were talking about how do you say something to someone? Like, if you're my friend and I'm really depressed and sad and sort of withdrawn. What do you do? Well, you decide what you're going to do. When I went to QPR training, question, persuade, and refer, the guy who was teaching the thing was talking about how in his life he had a friend, I want to say it was a family member, who was definitely planning on harming themselves, and he found out by asking her the question of, are you planning, do you have a plan to hurt yourself, or are you thinking about hurting yourself? And her answer was yes. And the R of, you know, try to send them off to resources that are available, she wouldn't go. And so he had to call the cops on her. And she was pissed. She was mad at him. She hated him for a good year or two because she didn't want to go for services. She got put into a 72-hour hold, which then I guess resulted in some actual additional counseling. But 2 or 3 later, years later, as much as she hated him and was angry at him, she went back to him and said, wow, I think you really saved my life. So I guess one of the big things to understand is just because you want to help does not mean it's going to be easy or simple or painless. If you care about trying to save someone's life, it may not go the way that you expect it to. And here's the other part is if you are trying and it doesn't work and someone dies anyway, It is not your fault. There is probably not something more you could have done. When someone has decided it's time for them to go, they're gonna go. So, and as Fiona put it, it is different for everyone. What your challenge is is not someone else's. Um, I had a student in here today in my office and we had a little ant problem. I don't even know about yay big ants. And, um, and so I had an ant on my, on my desk here and I just kind of scooched it off because I really try not to kill anything. And my poor student lets me know, she's like, I'm afraid of ants. They really freak me out. And I'm like, oh, sorry. She's like, if I were you, I'd be totally losing it right now. And so we had this conversation about the reason it freaks her out is because she sees one ant. And she just knows there's thousands somewhere. And so the unknowing of the knowing that it's there, uh, is what freaks her out. So she and I had this conversation about how even though we know, like, logically that little tiny ant isn't going to do anything to us, we just get totally freaked out. So, um, so why am I telling you about— because it for her was an ant. It for me is not an ant. Hello, Miss Carrie Anne, how are you? Good evening, sir, uh, Mr. Petrulino, how are you? Um, yeah, telling the truth to others is often hard, and your truth is not necessarily their truth, because I don't know if you're like me at all, but if I see that PNW Woods is having a hard day, I might see it differently than the way he sees So my truth of how I perceive PNW Woods may not be the same as what he's perceiving. So if I go over to him and say, hey, PNW, are you having a really bad day? He goes, no, I'm fine. Thanks. I'm like, okay, sorry. It looks like you're having a crap day. So we don't know. Our perception of others is definitely different on the outside than the inside. We were also talking— oh yeah, so sorry, I'm going to throw up clover tacks because cloudy days, no sunshine, rain, etc., that has a significant impact on lots of people. My mother-in-law has the same— well, I don't know why it is for cloudy days, no sunshine, etc., but I know my mother-in-law has a really hard time. It's very easy to be depressed and sad when it's cloudy and there's no sunshine, or when the rain, especially like a cold, miserable rain, is keeping you in. We have to have some kind of happy place to go to. Like for me, a nice rainy gray day is a great opportunity to go sit in front of the fire and read a book, and that for me is comforting. So it for you is going to be a different it for me. So yes, C&T Designs. No, we don't have fire ants up here in New England. I stay away from places like Arizona that have animals that kill you on a regular basis. I mean, not saying that C&T's in Arizona, but my husband wanted to move to Arizona once, and it was— did you know Arizona has the most poisonous animals in all of the contiguous United States? Yeah. So yeah, I don't go south. I mean, I go south to visit y'all, but I'm not living there. Um, Let's see. Oh wait, is that more ants? Yep, those are ants. Uh, movie in the '70s, it was about a resort being overrun with ants. Freaked me the hell out. And yes, I've actually watched some of those documentaries on fire ants. That is not a nice way to go. No how, no way. Um, yeah, and Carrie Anne, in case you're still over on Facebook, Barbecue says hi. Um, and just in case you all didn't know, Barbecue has already done a Two-A-Woman Wednesday with Mary Ann, I'm pretty sure, pretty sure. I'm like, I get confused because I know she's been on Riding Shotgun with Charlie. I'm assuming she's gone on Barbecues. I do get a little confused. I don't even know where I've been half the time. Okay, I just want you to know, Clover Tack, I read that wrong at first. I said it's like I'm totally naked at night, but sometimes no sun about during the day. Then I reread it and I was like, totally okay at night. Good to know. Um, but no sun during the day, it does affect a lot of people. Um, if you talk to the medical community, they will tell you, uh, one of the number one things— okay, ready? This is a tip or trick for all of you. A large, large percentage of the American population is short on vitamin D. And why is that? We used to be an agrarian society. We were outside all the time. We need our sunshine because our sunshine allows us to create vitamin D. So here's my suggestion. I am not a medical doctor, nor am I giving any medical advice. However, I highly suggest everyone takes vitamin D because it's important, especially on those rainy days, on those days, you know, you're not getting outside. So unless you're PNW, I don't like the sun too bright. Well, I guess that must mean you're a vampire then, but I don't like sunshine too bright when I've got a migraine. So that's totally not so awesome. All right. So part of the thing I have to tell you about tonight about, um, I was talking to DeeDee a little bit earlier about why I'm here is it's my son's 16th birthday today, tomorrow, but we got him his presents today. So I want to know, I want to let you all know how important you are to me because I left my first game of Cards Against Humanity for you all, and we were laughing something hysterical. And that would be another thing, uh, vitamin D, very important, super important. Most people are deficient. And if we're going to talk about like how awesome and wonderful our healthcare system is, most insurance doesn't cover you getting your vitamin D levels checked. Until you have a vitamin D deficiency. But if you don't get them checked, then how would you know? So just take vitamin D. All right, um, Clover Tack, biggest thing, the realization that was affecting me. Now that I know, living was pretty easy. Exactly. I was actually talking to my 14-year-old earlier today in sort of like the ant conversation. Noticing is 100% super important to be able to fix things. Um, the short version is that, um, people who are afraid of the future are usually living in anxiety. People who are living in the past are often dealing with depression. People who are living right now in this moment, paying attention to exactly what is happening, those are usually the happiest people. We freak ourselves out by going to the future, right? It's like the ants, right? We'll go back to the ants, right? So if I go find myself a fire ant, you know, tunnel thingy, you know, those big things that they live in, I go lay down in that fire ant home, I'm probably going to have a really crappy day. So I could get myself all worked up and distressed over the fact that a bunch of fire ants are going to kill me with all their venom. Or I could realize, oh, wait a second, it's Saturday night, I'm doing a Suicide Prevention Saturday, I'm safe in my office, and nothing bad is happening. Or I could live in the past, and I could think about how my childhood was stolen from me by adults that shouldn't have done the things they did, or kids my age who did things they shouldn't have done. I could live there, and I could be very depressed and very victimized Um, but no. So noticing, like, if it's cloudy and rainy and you don't feel so happy, oh, what can you do? Bake bread. It's one of the happiest smells there is. Light a candle. Take some vitamin D. Take a deep breath. Do something that makes you feel better. Snuggling by a fire with a book. Whatever your it is, right? Because we have talked about all these things. Um, all right, so I'm gonna go with barbecue, and Carrie Anne are replying to the fact that yes, she's already been on 2A Woman Wednesday. Um, so I, I'm pretty sure I hooked them up, so I should know this for sure. Um, yeah, Texas is crazy hot. Texas is also crazy big. It's the only place I've driven for 2 days to get out of coming from Arizona. Um, yeah, and you all can have your 4-foot fire ant mounds and, uh, you know, 80-year-old man mowing grass. Gators and hogs— don't you see the gators coming? And how do— and hogs, those are, those are like bad because I don't know, I know in, um, Texas they're a huge problem for the farmers. All right, so I'm way behind, so I don't know what you're lying to you when you said like cat. So, dunny days. All right, I'm gonna say the blind guy can't type, so I'm gonna go with sunny days make me feel fine. Um, and yes, CNT is correct with one reason the suicide went up with the lockdowns is where people couldn't even go outside. More importantly than that, not that that's not part of it, there's a whole bunch of reasons why suicide went up. Like we've talked about in the past, teen and preteen suicide has been on the rise since 2013. So even pre-pandemic, um, our, our kids are suffering greatly for lots of reasons. Um, but as far as COVID and rates going up, part of it is not being able to go outside. Part of it is we are social creatures. We need to see other people. We need to interact. I am one of the biggest hermits out there. If I don't have to interact with anybody, I am happy staying home and not interacting with anyone. However, we are meant to be social. We have to go out. Um, we have to do things with other people, interaction. Um, and yes, DJ, laughter is medicine. Um, oh wait, but medicinal use is legal in some states. Maybe, maybe not. Um, yeah, hopefully it's legal pretty much everywhere. But yeah, so there's lots of reasons why the lockdown created a higher rate of suicide. Um, the other thing that like they're not talking about a lot is how many people died alone in their homes and weren't found for long periods of time. I mean, there's lots of creepy stuff that happened over the previous 2 years. Uh, yeah, I'm getting caught up on these comments. So snuggling fire can be a dangerous thing, warm and thrilling. But so on that note, I will have you know, as a Tony Robbins graduate of Date with Destiny, I have walked on 40 feet of fire more than once. I actually eat fire for the fun of it because why not? Um, so yes, exactly. So snuggling, and snuggling by the fire, not in the fire. And, you know, and no, I don't eat hot coals. I walk on hot coals, but I eat actual fire. I wish I had that picture. I would totally share that with you. And yes, you need to decide what makes your heart happy. As one of my friends so succinctly put it, you can fucking choose what you pay attention to. And this is one of the reasons why I avoid the news like the plague. Plague because the news and the headlines, they decide what you're going to focus on. A lot of my friends know that I don't watch the news and they think that I am uninformed, and I'm like, no, I actually pay attention to the things that I want to pay attention to, and I go to the actual sources for the things that I pay attention to. So, oh, your it changes as you get older and week to week. Without a doubt. Um, and this is one of those things where it's like being in the political field, I know that a lot of politicians get lambasted for having an opinion at one point in time and changing that opinion. I'm like, well, I believe people change, and I'm not a fan of any particular politician all that much, but it's just like when they want to dredge up what somebody did back in 1960 and say, see, this proves so-and-so is a bad person, and it's now 2020, I'm like, no. If you compared me to my 1985 person to who I am now, we got a lot of differences in those years. So I don't know if I'm changing week to week, but definitely, um, sorry. I am laughing out of discomfort because I hate killing anything and Clover Tack's talking about shooting pigs in the face and I'm just like, ah, fun for you perhaps, but that would not be my it. I don't have a problem after the fact if we're going to skin and gut and quarter and all of that. I'm not killing anything and I sure as heck am not putting, shooting anything in the face. So, Anyway, oh my gosh. Oh, what else? What else? Oh, you guys are like 5 million miles a minute. I can't talk. So, um, I'm like, pardon me, I'm just gonna scroll down and get back to you later. Oh wait, so DJ put this up. Jump in the Fire, Metallica. If Fiona was here, she would truly love that the best because Fiona loves Metallica. Like, for real. All right, so different subject. What is it? Gwebs. Any research number of people who are trafficked that result in fatality in him or considered a suicide? Ah, that's way beyond my purview of things that I pay attention to. I do not know. I know that, uh, the Underground Railroad— crap, is that what it's called? What is it? Um, is it the underground world? Ah, there— so there is a group that is trying to help trapped, trafficked kids and sex people in general, because it's not just kids, it's men, it's women, it's children. Um, all of those folks who want to have open borders don't quite understand how the crime world works, and God bless them for having such a pristine idea of humankind. Having just played Cards Against Humanity. That's kind of funny. Um, but, uh, sorry, um, I don't know where this goes in all of the chats. That log had it coming, it wasn't wearing pants. Um, I kid you not, there was like a card like that, sort of similar, in Cards Against Humanity that we're playing tonight. So hence the reason I got all confused. But so as far as human trafficking goes, and I think it's the Underground Railroad, but I can't think of what they're actually called, um, trafficking is super bad, right? Open borders are super bad. As far as how that leads to suicide and everything, just imagine for a moment that you are not part of your— you have zero control. You're literally locked in the closet for days and taken out or being a play toy for some person. And I use the word person, hmm, limitedly. So, um, so that's my answer, Pete. I don't really know a lot about that. I just know that our kids that are not currently being trafficked are definitely, um, awesome. You found it. Oh, whoops. Sorry. All right. Blind guy typos again. My bad. All right, Underground Railroad is ourrescue.org/training or /faq. Um, so yeah, I mean, as far as Naomi Judd passed after many years of mental health issues, lots and lots of people have mental health issues, and yet we're still in the mindset of suck it up, buttercup, or not me. Again, talking with my 14-year-old in health class they were talking about mental health. And she's like, she said, Mom, most of my friends, there's— go, I don't need that. And I'm like, you don't know what you don't know. And we are not good at communicating to our children, to our friends, to our family that no, we're not supposed to handle it all. No, we're not supposed to handle it all on our own. Um, you know, God bless everyone who wants to live alone, and I get that because society is hard. It's not, it's not for the weak of heart. But at the same time, we have to get help from someone sometimes. And the funny part is, sometimes it's a coach, sometimes it is your hairdresser, sometimes it's your barber. Like when I had Jake on here, we talked about that. It's like there's actual counselors that are trained However, at the same time, there are people that will help you just because you talk to them. I don't know if it's a girl thing or it's a person thing, but I know for myself, a lot of times all I have to do is say something. A while back, there was a book called Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. It was written by a guy named John Gray, and I happened to see him And he sort of talked about men wanting to fix stuff. So if I tell you I broke my nail and it's bugging me, you will go get a nail file, a Band-Aid, and say, here, honey, take that. And sometimes I just want to whine about the fact that my nail is broken and it hurts. I don't necessarily want you to fix it for me because I can fix it for me, but I want to say, oh, I'm sorry, kid. Are you all right? You know? So, Whereas guys, God, I love you guys, because if something is wrong, you do just go fix it. I tell my children that my husband is basically a genie in the bottle where we just wish for stuff to happen and he goes and takes care of it. So it's trying to remember your way of communicating is not necessarily my way of communicating. I prefer not to swear. I have friends that swear like crazy. I don't take it like personal that they're swearing around me, and I don't care. It's just that it's not my choice. My daughter can't wait to swear. She swears when she's not around me. She loves that. So our communication strategies are different. Male versus female is different. Older versus younger is different. Oh my gosh, on fleek. One of my, my daughter explained to me on fleek was when everything is on point, everything is just so. And I go like this because I guess it usually refers to one's eyebrows. I don't know these things, not my, my, uh, thing. Um, and yes, Clover Attack, the, the, the nice thing about, uh, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus is that it helps you think about communication strategies. 'Cause honestly, a lot of times our mental health, good or bad, is a lot about our communication strategies because it's not just with me to you, but it's also me to me. Like, how do I talk to myself? What words do I use? Do I say, oh my God, you're such an idiot today. What the heck is the problem? You can't get outta your own way. Why are you so this? You know, we beat the crap out of ourselves. However, with some Tony training and various other influences like Ed Mylett, Dean Graziosi. It's like, okay, what could this mean? How can I make this better if I'm not happy with how it is? Um, this is one of those things where it's just like, we could do weeks just on communication. Um, and mental health is used as a weapon, um, historically to remove people from positions or demote, etc., to get more attention. Is TBI— I don't know what TBI is— issues are diagnosed better. So, um, yeah, it's like if you have a mental health issue, you are broken. Uh, I know this example from my personal life where my husband and I were applying for life insurance and they denied me, and they're like, you lied on your application. I'm like, what did I lie about? And they wouldn't tell me, wouldn't tell me, wouldn't tell me. And then finally they said, oh, you forgot to tell us that you asked for a counselor from your primary care physician in 1999. And this was like 2001, 2002. I'm like, okay, my grandma died. I asked for a grief counselor and they were gonna deny me my life insurance because I forgot that I had asked for that. So yeah, the brokenness of mental health is definitely a huge problem. Um, I think Guns and Barbecue is making fun of me because I will not swear. I try not to swear. I do swear, don't get me wrong. I'm not, um, Miss Pollyanna Goody Two-Shoes, but I try not to. But I do say, oh, peanut butter and jelly for sure. Um, all right. So here's the fun, um, health professionals learn this, it might be better alter their message to reach those with issues with topic. Here's the real deal, right? It's not about our medical professions. It's you, me, your brother, your uncle, your sister, your mom, your dad. This is where the change starts. It's not going to start in the medical field, um, just like any other field, just like we've got good gun owners and we've got bad gun owners. We've got people who we wanna hang out with. We've got friends who we've got, people we don't wanna hang out with. I believe God told us to love everyone. He did not tell me I had to like everyone. So I'm okay with loving y'all. I don't have to spend time with people who I don't like. But as far as the healthcare professionals, yes, they will. But only after you and I, as their patients, let them know we actually wanna talk about mental health, that it's something important. And yes, DJ, I did learn fleek means perfect or well done. I just like, um, uh, on point, because that one I knew. My daughter's like, but isn't fleek more fun to say? I'm like, no, because it makes me feel dumb because I had to look it up what it said. But that's being willing to fail and learning from what you don't know. Ah, TBI, traumatic brain injury, in case there's anyone else out there that doesn't know, like I didn't know. Um, Yeah, I actually have friends with TBI now that I know what it is, uh, from car accidents and that sort of thing. And I mean, there is tons of stuff happening in the mental health, um, arena in general. Um, and GT3, just so you know, I just look at it this way: if every other word I say is an explicative, then when I say it, it loses any impact. And my children will tell you, if I am swearing, they are scared. So it's working, at least in the household. Um, and yes, I didn't think you're really making fun of me, but, um, DJ Googled that. Yeah, he probably did. So back to TBIs. So as we learn more, again, it's like I've been talking about lately, is anyone who says how can they not know that doesn't seem to pay attention to the fact that Knowledge is immense and infinite, infinite and never-ending. So it's super easy not to know everything. And just because I know something, I don't expect that you're going to know that. That's why I come on every Saturday to say 2 out of every 3 gun deaths is a suicide. And if we want to save lives, we should focus on mental health, not on firearms. Should we focus on violence prevention? Absolutely. Should we focus on gun violence prevention? No, because we want to stop violence long before anyone has a gun in their hand. Is it realistic to think we can have impact on reducing violence and suicide? 100%. If we focus on the big picture, and this is the thing that drives me totally crazy about everybody wanting to make more laws, more laws, more laws. It's just like, you're not going after the important things. You're not going after the big numbers. So, um, all right, TJ, ready? Yeah, I'm sure you do. See, I'm not even gonna read it. So, all right, um, all right, so that's kind of it. It is 30 after-ish. Oh no, 29 after. That's right, I started like 2 minutes early. Uh, do thank you all for popping in and saying hi and being all chatty. And I will say, yes, laughter is hysterical. And it makes your stomach hurt. And my daughter asked that we play this as our game night thing from now on because it's way fun. So it's always fun to build family and build connections. I know my children are growing up in a much different world than I grew up in. It was— it's just everything is different. Every generation has their different challenges. So it is my plan to have a good week. Tomorrow's my son's birthday. We're gonna go out and celebrate that. Following week, I gave you all the updates yesterday on Friday. Um, all right, G-Tether, I'm gonna warn you, that might be a while, only because I'm in the midst of reading another book right now, and I'm trying to do them serially versus having like 5 that I'm partially through. Um, and you are welcome, and thanks for reminding me to show up from time to time.. But, um, yeah, you are all very, very welcome. Uh, and yeah, see, this is me dealing with compliments well. What do you think? Am I getting there? So, uh, we talked about lots of stuff on the Polite Society podcast today if you want to go check that out. And, um, and if I got this right, for what it's worth, it's a fast read. You're assuming I can read fast, so that might be an assumption you might want to take back. So, all right, we got 3 minutes, I think, until Barbecue— or no, maybe 4 minutes until Barbecue starts up his chat on his, um, on his channel. Hello, Mr. Harding, uh, have fun tomorrow. I think you're going somewhere tomorrow, something about Hawaii and that sort of thing. Um, I know you're not going to Hawaii, but so have fun at lunch, I think. So yeah, we will see what goes on in life. I will see you all next Saturday. It might be my car, so I'm not done StreamYard on my phone yet. I know it says you want to do it on here, but we have the GOP convention next Saturday that my husband and I will be at. In theory, we're supposed to be done by 4 or 5. It would not be the first time they did not stick to a schedule, but I'm really certainly hoping by 9. Um, and, uh, yes, we— well, you have my email. We're emailing back and forth now, G23. So, um, give me a time and, uh, we can pick a date. I have lots of crazy commitments over the weekends in May, uh, between a GOP convention, Women's Expo coming up, the Aiming for Zero match and so on. And oh yeah. And by the way, yeah, just working in general, cuz I was supposed to work on the weekends. So yeah. So daughter's coming home. I knew there was something, I mean, I knew it was a girl in Hawaii and I couldn't remember the rest of it. So family, if you've got some that you like, go hang out with them, give 'em a hug, tell 'em you love 'em, all that good stuff. Remember, tell yourself that you love yourself. One of the hardest things I do is when I'm having a really bad day, my husband says, go look in the mirror. Smile and tell yourself, I love you. And I gotta tell you, 99% of the time it cries. So you all go try that. You let me know next week after you stood in the mirror, looked into your little eyeballs and said, I love you in all seriousness. Let me know how you felt. All right. On that, I am so outta here.