In this live‑streamed Suicide Prevention Saturday talk, Brooke Cheney opens by explaining why she got out of bed to speak, emphasizing that every viewer matters. She introduces the central thesis that “happiness is an inside job,” meaning that while we cannot control others’ words or actions, we can control how we react to them. Using everyday examples—such as how a text is interpreted differently depending on mood, or how a stubbed toe elicits different reactions—she illustrates that emotional responses are internal choices. Cheney discusses the importance of self‑awareness, role‑model thinking (WWJD, “what would your highest role model do?”), and striving to be a little better each day. She shares personal trauma narratives, including the loss of her sister, childhood sexual abuse, and struggles with alcohol, to show how pain can be transformed through forgiveness. She highlights resilient friends—disabled veterans, a friend with multiple sclerosis—who model perseverance without self‑pity. Forgiveness is framed as a liberating act that turns internal darkness into light. The talk concludes with practical suicide‑prevention resources (national 211 hotline, online hotlines, texting, email) and a call to volunteer, donate, and support community members. Throughout, Cheney balances conversational humor with earnest encouragement, aiming to equip listeners with emotional‑management tools to reduce suicidal risk.
Chapters
All right, it's super quiet because I didn't say anything yet. So anyway, Suicide Prevention Saturday here at A Great Start Shooting School. My name is Brooke Cheney, and I was in bed and I was ready to go to sleep, and I'm like, oh crap, it's Saturday. So I just want y'all to know that you are important enough for me to jump out of bed to come down and do this. So, hey Art, you're looking fuzzy, dude. I did not notice how long your beard was when you posted that picture up. Anywho, yeah, it's definitely later than normal, 'cause like I said, I was just in bed and realized, oh, I hadn't done this yet. So here I am. I have made my life more complex, 'cause now I'm doing Facebook Live and YouTube Live, and the reason I'm going here and there is simply because my Facebook feed's here and my YouTube feed is down here on my screen. So anywho, jumped out of bed to come talk to everybody about suicide prevention. Um, again, I always thank all of you for the encouragement who tell me that this is worthwhile because it does help. Cause, um, I don't know, all of us struggle with, you know, insecurity to some level or form or another. And I am pretty sure of that. Just because I've dealt with it all my life. Um, just a lot of people don't acknowledge it. There you go. So I do actually have notes. So, ah yes, the title of this, um, Happiness is an Inside Job. I'll figure out what I'm trying to say here. So I was out today randomly— well, not randomly, we were getting skis for the kids, But I stopped randomly at a store and there was a girl in there who had a text from someone and— hey Pete! Um, and, uh, her face immediately got like sour and she was like, I don't even understand why this person, uh, texted me. And the reason I came up with, uh, happiness is a suicide— is an inside job is because you and I do not have any control over what anybody else says or does. What we do have control over is how we react. And part of the reason we do some of the— I do the video stuff is because you can see my eyes and you can see my face and you can hear my voice. When we text back and forth, there is no intonation. I could be saying hi, I could say hi, be with the text, you're going to read it however you're going to read it. Like, whatever mood you're in is how you're going to receive my text, regardless of whether I'm like, hey, how you doing, versus, oh, hey, how you doing. It doesn't matter what I do because it's how you receive it. So happiness being an inside job is really all about making sure you're aware of what you're thinking. Now, if I'm super bitchy to you I may be having a really bad day because, you know, ask any of my friends, I can be super like not so nice. And sometimes we have grace for people who are having a bad day, and other times we don't feel we deserve to be treated that way. And the reality of it is you never know. Um, I'm I'm willing to bet the day after I was told that my sister had been killed in a car accident, I may not have been the sweetest person in the world. I may have been distant, cranky, distressed, all of those things. But if you didn't know that I just lost my sister and you just, you just saw me like a very cranky face, you might just think I'm just a cranky person. So happiness being an inside job. It is your job and my job to take care of our emotions. Now, is that an easy job? No. Um, like any skill, you have to keep working on it. And I know I've mentioned this before, but I never know who's watching and who's seen this and who hasn't, but there's always someone who is worse off than you, and there's always someone who is better off than you. And your goal and my goal is to be a little bit better than we were yesterday, whether whether that's learning something new, doing something new, or just in general trying to be a better human being, which I think most of us do on a regular basis. Um, let's see what else. Oh, so I gave myself notes today because I'm trying to stay on track so I keep these shorter. Um, so what did I say? Oh yeah, have you ever walked through your living room and stubbed your toe? And for my life, I know I've absolutely done that. And there are times when I just go, "Ahh!" And there is no noise that comes out of me whatsoever because the pain is so spectacular that I am just holding my breath and then trying to remember to breathe. And there are other times when I kind of sound a little bit like a sailor. So, What is the difference between when I stub my toe and say nothing versus the times that I stub my toe and various adjectives come rambling out of my mouth really loudly? Generally, it's me. The coffee table that I just stubbed my toe on did not change. My mental state is what it was, what allowed me to either be in control or to not be in control. It's all about me. It was never the coffee table that I stubbed my toe on. So the other thing that can change how I react is who's around. If someone like my grandmother was around when I stubbed my toe, I would probably take that breath in and just be quiet and that sort of thing. Same thing if my little children who can talk were around, because I don't want them learning words like that. So, um, and the reason I tell you this is because all of those people are always reminding you, because you can think about your grandma even if she's not in the room, assuming you had a good relationship with her, of course. And, um, I wrote down WWJD. And for those of us Christians out there, what would Jesus do is a good way to think about how you want to react, because for Christians Jesus is God and all that fun stuff most people know. Um, but the idea is simply that who do you want to be? Who is your highest, uh, role model, let's say? And so just do what would, you know, Mickey Mouse do, whatever your thing is, whoever you find to be a calming individual. So inside job. What would whoever your role model is do? Because we always want to become just a little better today than we were yesterday. So inside job, be kind to yourself, be kind to others. Nobody knows anyone's full story. You don't know if the person who you thought was just being really cranky just lost their job. You don't know if that lady who just paid for you in front of your car from Dunkin' Donuts, maybe she just lost her job, but she had to do something for someone else. So whether someone's being kind or not, you— we never know where they're coming from, and there is always someone out there who's having a worse day than you. I think one of the best things about being in the shooting community is getting to meet such a varied— a variety of people. And recently on my Facebook feed has been the, um, gosh, I'm horrible with politically correctness. Um, all right, I'm just gonna say my disabled veteran friends, you know, my friends who have missing limbs. And it's one of those things where there are amazing people, but it seems like the the more challenges they have, sometimes the happier they seem. And they're inspirational. But if you tell them that, they're going to tell you no, they're not inspirational, they're just getting through their life the best they can. Um, one of my friends has MS, and she knows who she is, and if she's watching, she knows who I'm talking about. And people tell her all the time that she is just amazing. And she's stuck in a wheelchair, man, and it sucks, and it does, and it's hard, and it's painful because MS sucks. And yet she makes it look good. She makes it look like, yeah, life sucks, but I'm gonna make the best of it. And she really kind of does. I mean, she's got an amazing family, she's got some amazing friends, but I don't think any of us would be around her If she's like, "Boohoo, I'm MS and it's just the worst thing ever," because that will never come out of her mouth ever. And then there are people like me who, yeah, I got abused as a kid sexually, but you know what? There are worse things in life. I'm not going to be a victim all of my life. And that's a decision that I have to make in here. It is not something that anyone around me, the people who attacked me, are not suffering from what they did to me. And that was the other part of the inside job. We talked about forgiveness today too. I'm gonna throw that one in, is that for the people who did the things they did to me when I was younger, I was angry for a long time. I drank heavily as a teen, which without a doubt. I was done drinking by the time I hit college. I didn't do that so much. But the pain that I had and the anger I had is how I learned what forgiveness really is. And forgiveness is amazingly freeing. And, uh, another lady today just happened to say the quote that I think of all the time is hate or anger, or is like me taking poison and then expecting the other person to die. And that's what anger does, and that's what hate does, and that is what revenge does, is that it makes you suffer while the person who has wronged you, the person who has done whatever horrible thing they've done to you, they don't care what you feel. They don't have any— that has no effect on them if you dislike them or hate them or angry at them or wish they would die or any of that. Because it's a blackness in yourself. So forgiveness is super important. And it's not about suggesting that what that person did to you is okay. It's about loving yourself enough to forgive someone else of their wrongs so that you can go on living. And I believe that every time you forgive someone, your heart grows, sort of like the Grinch Who Stole Christmas, right? Grows and grows and grows. Because light can only exist if there was darkness, and your anger and your frustration that you can feel in your heart is darkness. And when you learn to forgive where that darkness was, you can now have light. So how is that for Suicide Prevention Saturday? And what does that have to do with Suicide Prevention Saturday? Because suicide is all about how your mental state is doing. It is all about your ability to pay attention to your emotions in your head and being able to talk to someone, being able to love yourself, being able to forgive whoever it is you're pissed off at because they don't care that you're pissed off at them and you're only harming yourself. Um, and that is what Forgiveness Inside Job awareness really has to do with anything. So like I always try to say, uh, if you're here in Connecticut— and actually, I think I've been messing up. I think if you call 211 nationally, you actually can get hooked up with a suicide prevention hotline. I could be wrong on that, but, um, internet— you're on the internet, so it's super easy. If you're having issues tonight or you need to talk to someone, there are lots of suicide prevention hotlines you can call someone just go to Google, the almighty Google, or Yahoo, or whatever, Bing, and type suicide prevention and/or suicide hotline if you need it. And there's texting, there's emails, there are phone calls. We are in the information age and it's all free. And if you don't have any suicidal problems, that's awesome. Feel free to look up some of those resources and donate to them, or like my girlfriend, um, Oh my gosh, I'm spacing on her name right now. Her birthday is today. You would think I could remember that. Sheena? All right, so anyway, volunteer your time. So we're almost at 15 minutes, and I think I am so done because like I said when I started, I was in bed before I realized it was Saturday night for I do this. So I am going to say good night, adieu, and I will see you next week. And I think that's it. And now I gotta turn off two of these things. So there's one. Oh wait, no, uh, it's not quite yet. There's one.
