Suicide Prevention Saturday on YouTube for the 1st time

It's gonna drive me a little crazy. All right, says I'm live. All right, so hey replay viewers, thank you for watching. Um, I know there's a lot of people that I never actually get to see live because they tell me about it after the fact. So here's the deal, it's Saturday, it is currently November 9th as I'm recording this. I feel really short, I'm because my camera on my phone seemed really high. So, um, today I'm doing something new and different. I have two streams, live streaming going right now. Who knew? Um, I have Facebook and I have YouTube because I'm expanding for the one-year anniversary of our Suicide Prevention Saturday chats. I thought that I will expand just a little bit. I'm trying to get more organized and give more value And that is kind of my plan here. So even though I'm really small, let's see, I have to like sneak up to see who's there, but then they disappear and I can't read that fast anyway. Um, so let's see, I got Steven and Charlie on Facebook and I don't even know anything about YouTube. So I'll have to go back and look at that later. So what does Suicide Prevention Saturday— oh, because this is my first time on YouTube, I'm going to do the whole thing. So my name is Brooke Cheney, and I am the owner instructor here at A Great Start Shooting School. And suicide prevention and firearms have what in common? Let me tell you. 2 out of every 3 firearms deaths are a suicide. And as a gun owner, I find it super important if we really actually want to save lives that we talk about suicide, because suicide is absolutely the silent killer. Since people are generally unaware that someone is suicidal or having challenges. Now, why do I do Suicide Prevention Saturdays? Well, simply for the fact that— oh, it's Kimberly Fisher! She's out at dinner. So anyway, sorry, I couldn't resist, hon. Um, yeah, see, this is— I like, I watched this guy Dean Grazioso, and he's like, I can't read the comments, I'll get off track. And that's me. So But I do want to say thank you for those of you who are watching live. So why is it so important to talk about? People don't know that it's happening. People don't know that they're not alone when they are feeling suicidal. And of course my computer is going to make noise for you guys now. And also people don't know how to deal with suicide after it's happened or when they find out one of their loved ones is suicidal. So my hope in Suicide Prevention Saturday is that it gives you something to think about, um, if you're having a hard time. It makes you understand you are not alone and there is always somewhere to go to get help. Because, um, for those of you who've been here for a while, understand that for me, suicidal thoughts were just part of my everyday life. It was, if I were dead, then I wouldn't have to be a burden on anyone. I wouldn't be in pain and I wouldn't have suffering. And that was kind of the short version of it. And when you deal with that on a daily basis and no one goes around telling you that, um, those thoughts aren't normal because they're just your normal, uh, it's, it's hard. So for those who are, who are suffering with these sort of thoughts, understand you really and truly are not alone. Um, for those of you who've never had these thoughts, congratulations, that's so awesome. It's glad— it's good to know not everybody suffers with stuff like this because it can be very challenging and some people don't win. So, uh, I have notes today. I'm trying to be all organized. So number 1 on my little notepad: always learn more. Something works for everyone. There is no magic bullet, there is no one-size-fits-all, there is no, um, single solution that will fix everything. And it's the other reason that always learn more is because you need to learn what works for you. So for example, weight loss is my favorite thing because most people understand weight loss even if they don't understand suicide prevention. But in weight loss, we have Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Paleo, um, intermittent fasting, uh, Atkins, you know, these things most people have heard of. And here's the truth: all of them work. Every single last one of them works for someone. And the idea is— thanks, Rebecca— um, the idea is that all of them work for someone. They may not work for you directly, immediately, but that's okay. You just need to keep learning and try something that does work for you. Uh, number 2 that I've got on my list: no one's life goes according to plan. Now, for those of you who have been here before, you know that I'm— which video I'm going to tell you about. But there is a video by Jocko Willink, and it's called Good, and I'm going to put it on my YouTube channel one because right now I'm on my computer with YouTube. And, um, so for those of you on Facebook, go to my Great Start Shooting School YouTube and you'll be able to see the link. And I'll put it up later when I get off for you guys. I just can't do it right now. So Jocko's good video is when things don't go according to plan, have your mindset be good. Uh, some of the things he says is, didn't get the job you wanted? Good. More time to prepare. Didn't get the gear you wanted? Good. More time to figure stuff out. Didn't get this, didn't get that. Because a lot of times we focus on all the stuff we didn't get versus the stuff we did get. And one of the stories is, for me, is that with my— the passing of my sister— my sister was killed in a car accident, and my mom and I that day were on the porch and we said, what's good about this? And it's not that we wanted to lose my sister or anything, but your brain is amazing and it will answer questions that you ask it. Hey, Peter. And if you say, what is good about this? Even something as horrible as losing a family member, eventually your brain's going to come up with an idea. So if you can change it instead of why me, why did this happen to me? Because your brain's going to come up with an answer for that. So that's not a good question to ask. If you can ask yourself what's good about this, or like in Jaco's video, he just says good and then come up with a reason why something that seemed like a bad thing is really a good thing. Um, let's see, number 4— no, 3. Suicide prevention for me is raising awareness, which I kind of did that in the intro. So I do my little 5, 10, 15, 20-minute deal here, and then people watch the replay. So my hope is that the suicide awareness stuff is a pond with a— I'm the little pebble that's getting thrown in, trying to create some ripples so that more people become aware. So more people can take this video, share it out to anyone, because you don't know who's watching. I don't know who's watching, let's be real. I'm not pixelated or any of those things, not yet. Maybe I'll work on that. So Um, that is my hope, is that I can help other people at least talk about suicide, bring up the issue. Um, and when we lost my sister, one of the things that I found interesting was people I'd known all of my life, I did not know that they had lost a sister or brother. And so in our society, it seems as though we really need to have that bond first of tragedy before we feel like sharing our tragedy with somebody else. And, um, that's the other reason why I do this. So listening, having actual conversations, which is kind of ironic because this tends to be a one, one-direction conversation that I have with people, which is I sit here and chat and you guys sort of sit and listen. But conversation You have two ears and one mouth. The idea is, if you really want to connect with people, if you really want to have meaningful information from someone else, you need to remember that you're listening in order to actually hear them. Another video I have, which I'm going to post on the YouTube Live, like I said, I will catch these up on the Facebook one after I get off here. But Jordan Peterson, he has how to really listen to someone, and it's a 10-minute video. But the short version is simply this: if you and I are having a conversation, the idea is I really want to listen to you. I want to hear what you have to say, and I'm listening to it. And to be super good, when you're done telling me something, I try to say it back to you and make sure that I truly understood what you, what you said. And this is how you can really connect with people. And the reason communication is so important is because when I was suicidal, I felt very alone and I felt that there was no connection to me or anyone else. And my, my, my peers, my parents, nobody knew any of this. Because it was all an internal struggle. So communication skills. Serenity Prayer. See, I've got bullet points, so I'm trying to get through all this. Maybe I'll get done in 15 minutes or less. So Serenity Prayer, for those of you who do not know it, I am going to read it to you. Yes, yes I am, because it's one of the things that I've always known— or I shouldn't say always known, but it's one of the things I've heard often enough. And people always ask me if I'm an alcoholic, and I'm just like, no, but it's a really good prayer because Alcoholics Anonymous does use this often in their teaching. So here it is: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference. So that's the short version. And why is that so important? Well, when you're down on yourself, when you're anxious, serenity is absolutely something that you need. And acceptance and forgiveness are things that will help you find your serenity. And having the discernment to know things you absolutely have the ability to affect versus the things that you do not. And the things I try to teach myself and my kids, because the reason most of us ever teach anything is so we can learn it better. But the only thing you truly have any control over is how you react to what somebody else does. So that's really it. It's one of those things where you could meet the sweetest person in the world and you could just be in a really bad mood, and it doesn't matter that you just met the sweetest person in the world. You're just going to be cranky because that's just how today is. And then there are other times when you are in the best mood in the world and someone is a complete and total jerk and you're like, oh, that's okay, honey, have a nice day, because you're in control of how you feel. Now, does it feel that way all the time? No. And this is where we get into my final thing for tonight, which is habits. Habits are what create success. And in order to overcome depression, anxiety, um anything that is troubling you. Basically, it's about having habits for success. So my, uh, my last prayer that I'm going to share with you guys is probably one of my favorites, and it's the morning prayer. It says, dear Lord, so far I've done all right. I haven't gossiped, haven't lost my temper, haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, or overindulgent, and I'm really glad about that. But in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed, and from then on, I'm going to need a lot more help. So, uh, yeah, it kind of sums up most of our things. But the idea is have a habit where you get up and you think like that, that, okay, I'm doing good so far, and how do I keep this going? Ask yourself empowering questions. And create a habit for you that helps you. There is one other thing that I have right by my bed, and I don't have it memorized exactly, but I know I have it on my Facebook page. And it basically says, I've done my best for today. I may not have been perfect, but I love you anyway. Because telling yourself that you love you is super important, and it's one of the hardest things to do for some of us. Like when I say us, I mean me, because like if I'm struggling, my husband would send me to the bathroom to go look in the mirror and look in my eyes and say, I love you. And I would cry because I'm like, oh, I don't know that I'm worthy. I just don't know. And it's really hard. So that's it. Those are all my bullet points. Create good habits that help you stay positive, help you understand and ask good questions. Read things like the Serenity Prayer, the morning prayer I just gave you. Listen to things like Jordan Peterson on how to communicate, and Jocko's video— it's only a couple minutes— on good to change your mindset. And always learn more. And that is what I have for you this evening. So I hope there's something helpful in there. Uh, Facebook folks, I will post those links to down below after I sign off here. And I think that's it. Oh, tools. Always have more tools. Um, most everything I gave you off of for tonight, I grabbed off of the internet. A friend of mine gave me an AA book called 24 Hours a Day, which apparently is an old one. They don't make this one anymore, but it's really cool because every day it has a prayer. And so today is November 9th, and prayer for the day: I pray that I might think of God as my friend. I pray that I may feel that I am working for him and with him. So it gives you something to look at, and there's a whole little lesson and meditation in here. But find something that will help you stay focused on stuff that is going to help you. So whether you're a Bible reader like me who has, um, yeah, this one got left out in the rain once, but has little notes and learning more. Whether— whatever your passion is, do something that makes you feel good on a regular basis. Now I'm really gonna go because it's a little over 15 minutes. So see you all next week and Maybe this will be my first and last Facebook Live. No, no, not Facebook Live, YouTube Live. We'll see how this goes. All right, let me see if I can finish all of this.