Suicide prevention Saturday - Running on empty

Hi everybody, welcome to Suicide Prevention Saturday. Why are we here? Because 2 out of every 3 gun deaths we talk about are suicides, and so we need to talk about mental health because nobody wants to talk about mental health and nobody wants to talk about suicide because who wants to talk about sad, depressing things like that? So Um, it is 9 PM Eastern, 9:01-ish, give or take. Tonight's episode is Running on Empty. And, uh, last night, yesterday, maybe the day before, I'm not even sure, DJ and I were chatting and he sang to me. So if those of you who do not know the song, for fear of getting, you know, the YouTube copyright, maybe he'll hum a few bars to us later today. Don't worry, DJ, I'm not asking you to do it right now. And I have to apologize because just as we started to start, I started losing my voice a little bit. So running on empty. So many of us do this so much of our time. This week for me has definitely been a bit more than usual. We love each other, and but we love our moms the most. Even if you have a horrible mom, you still end up really loving your mom and caring for them. So my mom had surgery on Tuesday, and that was a really long day because we started at 4 AM, drove to the hospital She went into surgery at 7, and why do I know it was 7? Because they text you these days as everything is occurring. And so the stress of getting ready for surgery, then having the surgery, and then coordinating everyone taking care of the person who had surgery for the rest of the week while still working and being a mom and trying to be a wife and being a good daughter and all of those things and trying to be a good instructor makes it great that I have the opportunity. Oh yes, sorry, I actually have notes for you guys today because there's just so much I want to try to get out in a little tiny space. So, um, running on empty, that is how I've been feeling a lot of this week. It's like 4 AM is too early to get up in the morning and then not go to bed. I mean, not go to bed till late that night and then did a whole bunch of other things that were exhausting. But the thing I wanted to write down was I get to. It's not that I had to go take care of my mom. I get to take my care of my mom because she's still here. I know, I'm sure that there are some of you out there whose moms have passed and are no longer with us. And this is where it's important to remember, I get to help my mom out. While she is still on this plane of existence. And I get to interact with students and stay up really silly late. Last night I got to stay up later than my normal bedtime because Jamie invited me on his show over at Georgia Shooting Connection. So I get to do all of these things. But when you're running on empty, sometimes it feels like, ah, I just need a little bit of sleep. I just need a little bit of downtime. And I need to learn how to say that word. No, it's two little letters, N-O, right? But, um, yeah, I get to. So I got to do a lot this week. And so this is why I'm coming to you, uh, what is this, um, makeup-free. And yeah, this is what my hair looks like after a day on the range in a ponytail under my hat. It's actually not as bad as I expected, but you know, it is what it is. So I don't know if I'm alone and you guys are always running on a full tank. God bless you if you are. But, um, I'm guessing that some of you can probably relate with the idea of running on empty. Now, the good news is life is a cycle, just like the year. For those of you who pay attention to the wheel of the year, we have spring. Where there is creation and celebration of what is to come. Then we have the summer where we have the fruits of our summer. Then we have the fall where stuff starts dying off. And then we have the winter where there is death. Now, every single day we go through that, right? We have the rising of the sun, we wake up. We have the noon and the sun, and then the evening comes and then the darkness. So we have that ebb and flow every single day, every single year throughout our entire life. Birth, life, death, right? So the good news is there's all of this up and down in between. So if you're like me and you happen to be in one of those holy smokes, I'm running on empty moments, Realize this is a blip on your timeline somewhere, and yes, you're going to have some downtime, and yes, you're going to have some more difficult time, and you're going to have downtime. And finding the joy in all of those things, the "I get to" mentality, is definitely, um, important to remember that that is an option. One of the things I've been reminded of this week as my tank feels lower than normal is remembering that when things are not going well, we are not our most resourceful and we're not at our best often. So DJ, my friend, I know you've been saying hi to everybody. I don't know if you have a lovely list already of welcoming everybody that is here. I know there's a Fiona because I'm trying to not look entirely, but, uh, you ready for the, uh, roll call and welcome in, sir?

Yes, and you've been doing such a good job of not looking at that screen. And, uh, you're right, Fiona, she was the last one in the room, so rawr goes out to Fiona. Uh, early on tonight, G-Webs was out there early, so was The Crabby Turtle checking in from the East Coast. Chasing Ghosts had, uh, what, charging up some batteries, I think she was talking about. We all need that by the weekend. Woods is out there, so is Misty, Mrs. Wayne, Sariafan93, good to see you out there, and Cindy Favorite has joined the chat. Just a moment ago. That's your roll call.

Ta-da! And thank you all for popping in here. And see, I'm gonna click the thing and then he's gonna click the thing and I don't know where we're gonna go. So, um, thank you all for popping in on a Saturday night, uh, no matter what time zone you happen to be in, because I know like Friggy was a bit earlier, dinner time I think for the puppers and himself. But, um, so Running on Empty. It is a good song, and yes, DJ, it might make you hum some later. Then that made me think of Ferris Bueller's Day Off. And Ferris Bueller's Day Off, my favorite quote, especially on weeks like this, is, "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." And This was 1986. Sorry, I had to go figure out that one. And it's one of those things where it's just like, if you haven't seen the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off, you should. It is kind of fun and it's always good to do fun things. But if you are a human, no matter what your age, generally it feels as though everything is quick. Now here's the thing. If you are a young human, like an 8 or 9-year-old, life is much slower. When you get to be a teenager, you're waiting until you become an adult so you can do whatever the heck you want, because when you're a teenager and you're looking at adults, it looks to them as if adults get to do whatever they want. And sadly, those of us who are already adults, we know that that is not the case, and adulting is hard. And so, sorry, see, I looked, so I'm looking at Woods and I don't know what he's referring to because I'm ignoring this mostly, but put your life jacket on first, right? Those of you who have flown in the past, what do they always say? Put your oxygen mask on first before you help anyone else. And we forget that sometimes. So speed of life, pay attention to what's going on. One of my favorite Tony Robbins-isms is that we are human beings, not human doings. And so remembering to be human, remembering to realize that you cannot do it all. All of us can do something. None of us can do it all. And this week is that perfect example for me. In that, yes, I coordinated care for my mom. Yep, I went to the hospital with her, but without the doctor and the nurses and the surgeons and the anesthesiologist from Dallas— no, wait, no, Miami. That's right. We were joking about how we got the anesthesiologist with the good drugs because it's the drugs from Miami. So anyway, without those people, my mom wouldn't have had surgery. But then the care team, which was me and my aunt and my uncle, and my, my husband and my kids, because they all helped out too, it wouldn't have happened. And when things are stressful, it's good to try to remember all of the pieces that are working really well, because I think we all struggle. Um, if, if any of you out there that are watching live right now, if you've never struggled, struggled in your life, Um, that would be amazing, but I go back to the chicken and the egg. Did you know that when you have a baby chick in an egg and they're pecking to get out, if you open that egg up so they don't have to force their way through there, the chick will die? Suffering is necessary for life. I know that kind of sucks, but it's true. Those of us who've been through trauma grow, just like physically. If I break my arm, where I broke my arm, when it heals, it's actually stronger than all the rest of my bone. Not that I want to break my arm, but, um, I think we forget. So the suffering can always be a blessing as well. All right, so we are human beings. We have to remember to be from time to time. We do run low on energy, emotion, skills. None of us can do it all. All of us can do something. And we need to remember to do simple little things for ourselves, such as before I came down here, I lit a candle. My girl Georgia, who I did an interview with, what, 3, 4 weeks ago now, she sent me Shorty's Candles and it's a rose. And she and I, when we were talking about it, I don't think it was on camera, I think it was off camera. Just, I was talking about how the smell of rose reminds me of my grandmother, and my grandmother was a very demure darling, and she loved pastel pink and roses and all of that. So in all of my craziness here, doing something as simple as remembering to light a candle that you love the smell of, oh, and folks, we've talked about this before, the things that your nose can do to you, those smells that make you so happy, if you've never sold a house, most real estate agents will tell you bake bread, bake cookies before you show a house, because our smell brings forth so many emotions. So I'm sorry, just keep going on and on and on. Yes. So hi, Woods. Haven't seen you in a bit. Oh, sorry. See, you pulled up one and I'm like, oh, look who's here. But I don't have a whole panel to do the 1, 2, 3. I don't know, DJ, you want to pop in here so we can do the 1, 2, 3?

1, 2, 3.

No, for, for, for this one.

I give you the 1, 2, 3 and you want me to carry the next line too?

Well, yeah. So anyway, I'm sorry, I just— because Mario was on last night and voilà. So God tests the worthy. Yes. And this is something we say to ourselves, such as, God doesn't give us more than we can handle. And I'm relatively confident most of us like, all right, God, I would be content if you would stop having quite so much faith in me, because we don't usually want to, um, deal with all the stuff that we have to, because life is not easy and simple. And Sorry, I looked to the side again. Oh, please. Oh, so, so yeah, God tests the worthy. God doesn't give us more than we can handle. We get stronger by being broken. I was talking to someone else who had dealt with trauma in their life, and, and she's like, and we agree though It's like the trauma that you have gives you the lessons to learn how to overcome. One of the things they talk about in AA, which are the Children of Alcoholics, is that you learn how to read people really well because when you have an addict in your life, whether it's alcohol, drugs, or narcissism, all those fun things, you learn how to read all of the different feelings that they have, so you know how to deal with those things. So, uh, yes, Michael Dunn, incense is also great smelling stuff too, if you get good stuff. Some of it's horrendous, but we also have different memories stored in our nose, right? Um, you guys all know— well, I don't know if you all know, but your tongue has— what, what is it, DJ? We got sweet, sour, salty, salty, bitter, Bitter, sweet, right?

Bitter.

We got 4 or 5 things.

Salt, sweet, 5 senses. No, no, no fingers. 3 fingers, 2.1, 1, 1 tongue, 1 thing, 6, 7. Is that 9? Some of us do have complex tastes.

All right, well, no, no, but the thing of it is, is like there's only like 4 or 5 spots on your tongue that actually taste something. Most of your taste is still in your nose. So, um, and, and, uh, Mr. Ron Wayne, bacon and leather are absolutely some of the best smells in the world.

Um, we just got bailed out. Cindy Favorite reminding us that the one we missed was sour.

Okay, but it's still 4, 5, whatever it is, because I can't remember— salty, sweet, sour, bitter, right? So we're still at 4. Anyway, the point is, is Even if it's at 5, we don't taste a whole lot here. It's pretty much all up here. And this is why, like, if you guys have ever been to a sommelier where they're doing the wine tasting and sniffing things and talking about all the things, is our noses can do so much, our olfactories. So blah, blah, blah, I apologize. Okay, so I appreciate that Gun Websites decides when he grows up he will take things slower. And then of course Guns and Barbecue has to throw something in here. Uh, where is it? Oh, I hit the wrong one. The baby chick is now edible. Yeah, that's disgusting. You're just, you're just wrong in the head, sir. I'm sorry.

So Michael Dunn is bringing in and he says 5. And this is the addition, umami or savory. So from the top, thank you, Michael Dunn. Sweet, salty, sour, bitter, and in other cultures, umami, and in some, savory. We got it, rock on. Thanks for that, bud.

All right, I'm laughing at Woods saying, thank you for saying aunt versus aunt. But hey man, it's like potato, potato, potato. What is it? We've got pop, we've got soda, we've got Coke. Yeah, everybody speaks different no matter where you are. Oh, all right. So DJ, you got the newest additions to our things. I know there's at least a Mario.

And yes, I do.

Did you— you got the barbecue out there too?

Yeah, you know, I have to start off the roll call closing out the show tonight with apologies and a nod indeed towards Guns and Barbecue. I left him out. And I did not mean to do that. So starting off and ending tonight's crowd that was out there is Guns and Barbecue. Also joining us tonight, Gun Websites was out there, Crabby Turtle as well, Chasing Ghosts joining us from the Texas area. We got Woods out there, Aunt— Aunt, we'll get back to that later. Misty Mrs. Wayne is out there, so is Sariafan93. Fiona is rocking the chat. Mario Mosin dropped in, so did Michael Dunn. Ron Wayne, as far as I know, it was one of the last ones in the room, but need to say a special hello to Cindy Favorite out there giving us sour, and a new face to say hello to. Guns of Barbecue, I said I'd round it out with you again, so we're, uh, uh, G&B with this. The correct term is soda pop, ice cold soda pop. Right on, man. I'm gonna go grab some of those sodas in Hillbilly Chat in just a little bit. Um, community, community coming together on that program in another great way, and that is helping someone who is got some challenges right now. Some of them are financial, and we've been getting together the last couple of weeks and talking about tonight. And tonight it is— it's a big gathering, a giveaway, uh, laughs.

It's gonna be nuts. It's like, so wait, do you even know what the, the, the, um, anyway, the role is gonna be? Like, I mean, basically tonight at the top of the hour, depending on what time zone you're currently in, um, at the top of the hour there is tons of giveaways on, uh, Hillbilly's channel. But let's finish up here before we go there. So what the heck? Woods is like, if you say potato or tomato, you shoot 9mm. Well, Woods, I'm gonna let you know, I shoot.22, I shoot 9, I shoot.38 Special, I shoot.357 Magnum, I shoot.45 and.50 and.500. So yeah, I say them all and I shoot them all because it's more fun to do it that way. All right, what is the only if it's not Black Ron? And, and so I just don't know that one. DJ, can you help me out there? What are we talking about? What was Woods talking about?

When you have the ability to randomly select comments and throw them on the screen—

well, no, actually, sorry, I know what it is. Ron Ways, it would licorice be number 6. Okay, and so I found it while, while— yeah, see, uh, all of that. 9 centimeter, not 9 millimeter. No, no, I just said 9 because I think ammunition is stupid, and that's what I tell my students every week. Well, I'm gonna go bigger, um, simply because up there I'm like, ammo is dumb because up there we have rifle cartridges, in the middle we have shotgun shells, and over here in the corner we have handgun cartridges, and they're not in order, and they go big and small. And so yeah, I think that it's just ridiculous that we have— yeah, black licorice. Some people love it though. And then without black licorice, we wouldn't have what, anise and all that fun stuff? All right, so DJ, you wanted me to pull up my stuff, the quote that I sent you.

Yes, please.

Okay, so short version of tonight in review, because we're 20 minutes in and y'all know I don't like going too long. And we have a crazy big night tonight on Hillbilly's channel because they're giving away tons of prizes, uh, celebrating the Scotsman. And if you don't know any of that stuff, well, just go check out Hillbilly's channel And there's tons of little videos on there. And even though tonight is sort of like a big celebration and giveaways, they're still raising more for him after this. So you have opportunity to help people do horrible things like drink hard seltzer with Milk Duds in it. All right, running on empty. We all do it from time to time. Try to check in on yourself. Like someone said earlier, and I apologize for not giving you credit, but I'm sure DJ will find it because he does this, is put your life jacket on first, put your oxygen mask on first. Remember, you have to refuel in order to help continuing help, uh, helping others. And speed of life. Life moves pretty fast. If you don't step— don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. Oh, it was Woods. Of course it was Woods. So And watching stuff like Ferris Bueller's Day Off, which should make you laugh, hopefully, is worthwhile. Then we are human beings, not human doings. Remember to just be you from time to time. And when you feel as though you have a chore that is not something you actually want to do, remember you get to. You get to do the dishes. Why do you get to do the dishes? Well, because you have dishes. Two, it means you had food on those dishes and that's why they need to be washed. Three, there's food in the fridge that you probably cooked and that's why you have that pan. So you get to eat, you get to do the dishes, you get to do the laundry, you get to clean the house. It's looking at stuff in ways that make important and realize that we get to have so many amazing options in our life. And when it feels like drudgery, remember, you get to. All right, so Red Dawn. No, I'm not watching Red Dawn tonight, Chief Webs. I'm going to go watch some of Hillbilly's channel. Maybe in the first hour I'll win something, and if not, I'm going to sleep anyway. Because I have multiple students tomorrow. Okay, yes, it's gonna be a big seltzer, Mr. Michael Dunn. That's what's happening at the top of this hour. And oh yeah, well, BBQ might have a point. People who love black licorice also love Jägermeister, and I question those people's decision-making capabilities. Uh-huh. And apparently Ron Wayne likes to mix black licorice and Roofing tar. All right.

Not recommended by this program or probably anyone else. No, try that at home.

And Michael Dunn, no spoilers. I haven't seen it yet. I've heard good and bad things and I don't want to know. I want to make my own decisions. All right, DJ, what would you like? You said you wanted the link or you want the thing. Do you just want me to read it to you?

I want the link, the thing, or the what? I want to say hello to— I want to say hello to Buck, the Tactical Buck. He was, uh, he joined in or, uh, typed into the chat there late and didn't get on that list. Um, someone else said, same last name, not related, um, everyone I know, everywhere I go, people need some reason to believe. I don't know about anyone but me. If it takes all night, that'll be all right if I can get you to smile before I leave. Running on, running on empty.

Yeah, okay, hold on, I think I