A teacher asking to talk privately triggers panic in most parents. The speaker explains why your gut reaction of guilt and anger won't help, and what to do instead: listen first, wait to talk to your kid alone, and find out what actually happened before you react.
Have you had that sick feeling in your stomach at pickup when the teacher says, 'Can I have a word, please?' Why is it it's never good news? What do we feel? Guilty that our child hasn't behaved well and it must be a reflection on our parenting. Embarrassed that they've got to speak to us. Angry with our child for causing this to happen. My advice: hear what the teacher has to say and tell them that you'll chat afterwards to your child. Don't tell your child off in front of the teacher, even though it's tempting. Why? Because if we do, the child— our child is really unlikely to want to discuss it and share with us what happened. We need to be their advocate and let them tell their side of the story. Look, no kid wants to behave badly, so there will be lots of other causes, and we need to get to the bottom of them first. Hit follow or give me a like if this fits with your aspirations for parenting.
