Camilla McGillWarm, practical, judgement-free parenting support

The mystery of tantrums unlocked

Name: The mystery of tantrums unlocked
Uploaded: 2024-07-15T16:05:07+00:00
Duration: 57 s
Channel: Camilla McGill
Description: In this segment of the parenting coaching video, the speaker— a mother of four and professional coach—explains that a key reason toddlers throw tantrums…

15 Jul 2024 · 1 min

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In this segment of the parenting coaching video, the speaker— a mother of four and professional coach—explains that a key reason toddlers throw tantrums is their desire for control. She illustrates this with a client story about Francesca and her daughter Sarah, who became upset during a car‑seat routine because she felt her autonomy was being overridden. The coach emphasizes the importance of handling such moments gently, avoiding forceful shoving, and acknowledges the common struggle parents face in maintaining patience.

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Why do toddlers have tantrums? Here's the second reason: they seek control. This is what happened to my client Francesca. With the arrival of her new baby, her daughter Sarah was feeling out of control. Sarah wanted control because, like most kids, she felt that she's constantly being told what to do, and when she's thwarted, she tends to lose it. So Francesca had strapped the baby in first and was trying to get Sarah in the car. It suddenly occurs to Sarah that she wanted to get 'Francesca's in a hurry.' But from my coaching, she knew that she didn't want to take the rough approach of shoving a screaming, wriggling toddler into a car seat. Who has done this and felt terrible about it? I know I have. As a mum of 4, my kids have thrown almost every single parenting challenge my way, and I know how hard it is, especially when we wind up losing our temper.