The Power of....The Honeymoon Effect - Episode 19

Welcome to The Power of Healing, your energy show. It's a show all about your light, your energy, your healing, and knowing that depression and anxiety are a side effect of not living your life intuitively. Not trusting your gut, the lost connections with self and others, and having and living a life of meaning. So this is a weekly YouTube podcast show, and it talks all about that, plus your spiritual path, the healing journey, ego, and unconditional love. This is episode number 19, and we are talking about The honeymoon effect. Yes. I mean, we all hear about, you know, the honeymoon, the honeymoon phase. We traditionally think about it as just, you know, being with couples, right? But I'm actually asking you guys, you know, now is, you know, what is the honeymoon effect to you? And it's not what you traditionally think. Think. And I want to welcome everyone. This is episode 19. And if you don't know anything about me, my name is Christine and I am an empath first and foremost. And I was stuck in, I'd say, the proverbial fight or flight, chasing, you know, the mighty dollar. Chasing material items and being stuck in my, in my life. Financially, you know, mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually. I had depression, had anxiety. I suffer occasionally from seasonal affective disorder depending on how much sun we get. And depending on where you live, I'm sure that can be an issue as well. But, and two attempts at suicide. So you know what, never judge a book by its cover and never assume that you walk in someone else's shoes until it absolutely happens to you. So welcome, please say hello, please share this out. I would appreciate that. Sharing is caring. And you know what, Just don't worry about what other people think. That's another thing is, you know, as being an empath, we tend to worry about stuff like that, or, oh gosh, I should, you know, ruminating and overthinking things, not utilizing the throat chakra enough. The heart chakra is definitely intact, that's for sure. So, you know, You know, I'll leave my bio down below, but I'm not, you know, gonna go through this. If you're curious, you can find me on all of the social media links through Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter, Pinterest, and YouTube. I think I've covered them all. All right, so this book, okay. I'm sure you know who Bruce Lipton is. He's written many books. He is all about your cells and biology quantum physics and the DNA. And he pretty much says the honeymoon effect is— now maybe, you know, just, you know, kind of think back. It's, it's a transition from a marriage-phobic skeptic or a commitment-phobic type of person into an adult who finally takes responsibility for every failed relationship in your life and realized You can create the relationship of your dreams. Yes, you can. And I think the most important one is the one with self. Would you not agree? Anybody? Anybody out there? Yeah, don't, don't be shy. Ask a question. You know, this is for the collective. This goes out on all my social media and YouTube and out on podcast as well through Anchor and then iTunes and I just started this, so this is all new to me. All right, just think back to a time when you first fell in love. I know I can. And think back to the big love affair of your life where you were head over heels, head over heels, always together. You felt like, you know, you didn't need to sleep, you didn't need to eat. You barely needed water and you had endless energy. That's the honeymoon effect. And I will take it a step further to say that effect, basically the book is saying you need to have, build that effect within yourself first. Why? Because through your subconscious programming, which most of us operate at 95% throughout the day. It's like you're just autopilot. Stuff that's been programmed into you from parents, from school, from situations, from friends, from anything is— yeah, it's tough. It's really tough to turn off. And he's saying that you attract these types of the same relationships. Do you ever maybe yourself or someone you know say, I keep attracting the same type of guys or gals, or all men, all women are the same. Um, not true. Not absolutely. Those are your experiences, and you're bringing them into any new relationship, whether it's, you know, platonic or it's, you know, love. And it's almost like you give out that, that signal that you know, I don't deserve anything better than what I've had in past experiences, or I'm never going to find the love of my life. Well, if you keep, you know, if you keep thinking that way, of course that's what's going to happen. It's, it's the, you know, sending those vibes out. And even though you're thinking them here, you're still sending them out. You're still sending them out. All right, so let's, let's dive into this a little bit. They're saying that you have— he says that there are 4 brains in the relationship, meaning, you know, depending on whether it's platonic or, you know, you're actually in a relationship with a spouse or girlfriend, boyfriend, whoever it happens to be, husband and wife, your subconscious, those programs, and then you're conscious because when you fell in love and in love with yourself as well, that's conscious, that's dreams and desires. Dreams and desires, that's imagination, that's light. That means anything and everything is possible when you're in that expansive form of consciousness. That means, you know, whatever you desire, you dream, you wish, you put out into the universe is going to come back to you. The subconscious is the part, you know, real life basically. I mean, He talks about how, you know, within the 6-month period after that, that subconscious slowly trickles back in. It's like you're on your best behavior. And I, you know, I'd say that in a job as well, you're on your best behavior. And then after a while, your old programs kind of sneak in a little bit as well. And, you know, as humans, we are driven to form bonds and connection. But it's all about balance, the yin and the yang. I'm sure you've heard that as well. And, you know, it's, it's almost like there's an imbalance as well. Yes, we're raising consciousness and we're becoming more aware of who we are, that we are ascending, that we are light, that we are made of the cosmos, the stars. That we are more than just human, right? We are solely connected to nature as well. And the, the flip side of that is, I don't need anybody, and, and nobody loves me, and I'm just going to do this on my own. Balance. You don't want to stray too far. It's, it's meeting in the middle. What feels good to you? Knowing that everything that you put out there, you deserve. It's when you go back to those, you know, being told as a child you didn't deserve that. By, you know, by if your mom or dad was really angry at you, you remembered that part, you remembered, I don't deserve this, or you're not worth it, or you're not lovable, or why are you crying so much? Stuff, stuff like that. It stays with you. It stays with you. All right. So, and I'll even take it a step further. I used to be in codependent relationships, and that was because of abandonment, abandonment issues related to my father. Now, you know, 40-something years later, it's taken that long. My wish is that, you know, we figure this out sooner. And I'd have to say, you know, my youngest, they're right there. I don't, and I'm not going to put labels on, you know, Gen X or Y or Z or millennials. It's the person, it's the person. And we all came here to learn lessons. And some of us take a little longer to learn. And, you know, and really, where's the time limit on learning a lesson? Again, that's an ego point of view, and ego is always negative. Your intuition, and that is part of your consciousness, is loving, it's positive, it's random, it's childlike. So, you know, going back to your childhood and, you know, love also causes the brain to secrete neurochemicals. Now, I'm not— I mean, I did my own reading here, so my own research. And I'm also thinking of starting a book club as well, like every month, just, you know, you give me your input, what you're reading, what's really lighting you up. What's really helped you, and we'll pick a book of the month, and we'll discuss that on, on the side as well. So let me know and comment below, even if it's on the replay, if that's something you'd like to participate in. So yeah, neurochemicals, dopamine, dopamine, pleasure and cravings, you know, we're talking here, right? Oxytocin, that's your cuddle hormone, right? That makes you feel, makes you feel so good. And growth hormones. And then there's serotonin in there as well. But fear, fear is the opposite. It creates cortisol. Cortisol is your stress hormone. And then it creates histamines. Stress hormones, actually, if you're always living in fight or flight or a high, you know, level of stress, it takes a toll on your body. It really, and your mind, like, The whole 360. That's why I, you know, meditation, exercise, diet, connections, it's all tied together. And I know people are, some people aren't ready for that yet. I get it. I get it. Oh, hi Terry. Terry Lynn is saying hello. Thank you very much. And definitely share this out, Terry, and let me know if you have any questions or if you've actually— if you've read the book, The Honeymoon Effect, or anything by Bruce Lipton, Joe Dispenza. I mean, these guys, Sue Mortar, they're all talking about energy and DNA. And, you know, I've got so many tabs on this book. It's a little much. So he's basically saying that, you know, your eyes, your eyes will bring something in, the information to the brain, and the brain perceives that information and then it interprets it. So it could be either positive or negative. It all depends on where you are. So then it's going to transition to your cells. So don't tell me that when you're stressed out, or when you're in grief or trauma, or if you're living in constant stress or anger, whatever it happens to be, it does not affect your body. Oh, yes, it does. And he is actually taking it a step further saying that we are, we have created superbugs. Meaning, and I know it's been in the news a little bit as well, that our whole stress, our whole fight or flight? Why is cardiovascular, why is Alzheimer's, and why is diabetes such an epidemic? Because this piece is off and your energy has everything to do with your cells and your DNA and the chemicals, everything that's running through your body. Oh, okay. Terry Lynn says she hasn't read any yet. I honestly, I just go to the library. I love the library. I get stuff on audio so then I can listen in my car. I listen to a lot of books in my car as well, or podcasts. I don't listen to the radio. It doesn't really resonate with me. I'd rather listen to healing frequencies or, you know, that the music from the '60s and the '70s. 70s where the frequencies, the tones in music were way different than they are now, if that makes sense. So, and then like I said, 4 brains in the relationship, you've got the subconscious and the conscious. So when you're in love, you're all in that consciousness, you're all in your dreams and desires, you're all on, I dare say, your best behavior. And then let's say, you know, I think there's an excerpt in this book about, you know, how relationships tend to go after 6 months. Let's say you bring something up to your partner, and he just, he just blurts out whatever comes out of his or her mouth. And that is coming from the subconscious, meaning they are not fully— they're not listening, they're not present with you. And then you're thinking, what the heck happened there? What happened to my loving partner? What happened to that honeymoon effect? Well, that's real life, and also being really present in your relationships with other people. And do you ever tend to, you know, if someone's talking, you're listening, but you're not thinking about how to respond, you're just listening. I mean, that goes so, you know, it goes so well in relationships. So, and he is just saying as well, human beings, we're a community made up of 50 trillion cells within a skin-covered petri dish, if that makes sense. So we can learn a lot of insight from cells because they work together, they live peacefully together without any issues in comparison to humanity or human, is figuring out the logistics of how a measly 7 billion humans can work together in harmony. I mean, he has a really good points here, how cells can work together so well, but, you know, two humans have such issues. You know, what did they say that the divorce rate is at? Is it 50% or— I don't even know if it's higher, but So basically, we, you know, we don't want to curse our bad luck in relationships. We need to recognize our efforts in bonding are a fundamental drive of nature, and they need to be, and they can be cooperative and harmonious. And we need to heed Rumi. She says, you know, yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I'm changing myself. Yeah, self first and then everything comes after. Um, so we just, we can create that honeymoon effect in our lives. We start with self, right? And where the relationships are based on love and cooperation and communication, um, and learning, you know, to, to listen more than you, you talk, um, just holding space for somebody is, is huge. And I do that, you know, every, every time I have a reading with someone or healing with, with Reiki with someone, or just this, you know, this relationship here, um, live and on a podcast as well. So, and it's all about, you know, um, lessons about the importance of trusting, you know, bad vibes and good vibes, because all organisms on this planet use vibration, energy, vibration, same thing. And for some reason, we make a big mistake of not listening to it, not tuning into it. We let our rational minds take over and downplay. You know, if you've ever been around someone that makes you feel strange or weird or off, you got to trust that. Don't play it off. It's also a mechanism to save you. Like, you know, that caveman syndrome. If you have a dinosaur running and you're not a runner and he's running after you, of course you're going to run for your lives, right? That's, that's part of that as well. So, and many of us learn from a young age to ignore messages we receive energetically. So don't listen to your feelings, listen to your words. No, no, no, no, no. I would always say use your words, but you know, your feelings are very important, but the words have got to match what you're feeling. And sometimes you don't know what you're feeling. So you kind of need to go and, you know, take that time to find out what it is, right? So we talk ourselves out of what do we know viscerally and energetically, we ignore warning signs. Like he's lying when he says he loves me. We felt guilty, as I did, about my strong dislike for certain people or even family or neighbors. So we rationalize. See, that's where the ego gets in there, the subconscious. We tell ourselves, I must be wrong because he's saying all the right things. And after all, I love him and love conquers all. So we ignore good vibrations. We, every day, we're getting messages. We're getting vibrations. Gosh, it's— I can always— oh man, I'm out in the public a lot lately and there's— it takes, you know, there's a lot of cleansing that goes on before and during and after just to keep that stuff because the people will place stuff on you and you don't even know what's happening. So, and there's bad vibes, that's nature's way of alerting you to potential compromising threats. So it's, it's just telling your nervous system, it's a warning, you're hanging out with the wrong person. You know, shouting matches, stuff like that, being in the same room. So you don't want to entangle in somebody's energy as well. I always like to place— I envision a rose in between myself and someone else, and I just let that love permeate. So yes, it's like a barrier. However, nothing is getting through, if that makes sense. And have you ever walked into someone's home and go, wow, this is so beautiful, it feels so peaceful, I love this house? The energy, the energy You know, just, just stuff like that, like really, you know, tune in and tap into your feelings more than anything, more than anything. So he's just talking more about, you know, he also talks about how sex is good in a relationship. And but happily ever after the goal is not sex for its own sake. Okay, the goal is sex with the person you want to have a real relationship with. And, you know, we cannot just respond to genes and hormones. So when you move from the proverbial bed to bed, from sex to abandonment, or when sex becomes like a gymnastics session filled with lots of jumping jacks, there's something missing. There's something missing. You're— it's like having an eating disorder or any type of addiction. It's a form of addiction. It really is. And that next person is not going to fix whatever is not going on. What's not fixed here, what they— it's— I really wish— do the work on yourself first and you will actually attract the type of person you want. Want, who's your vibrational match, if that makes sense. Vibrational match. So the moral of the story is be conscious of what you lust for. You know, just, it's time to stop saying, I always find that guy who's afraid of commitment, or I always find a woman who dumps me or uses me or spends all my money. You're kind of broadcasting that. You might not say it, but your vibe says it, okay? And you are worth a heck of a lot more than just, you know, something as, as a relationship of those means, right? So the subconscious mind is on a, is on a record play here. It is 1 million times more powerful than the conscious mind. Mind. And you can see how it's, it's really tough to try and break that. It's really, really tough to break it. But it's all about habit, habits, forming new habits. And I'll tell you what, um, and subconscious programs of unlovability operate 95% of the time. It creates some behaviors on reveals on how you feel. You may think it's a secret deep thought, but it plays all over your face. You know, like just saying you don't have a poker face, or you sabotage yourself. I've seen that. I've seen that a lot. I've done that myself as well. So how do you operate at 95% of your consciousness? Be conscious of what you ask for. You've got to reprogram the subconscious mind. You really need to take a step back and ask, what is it that I really want? Um, and take it a step further and write it down. I have, um, It's taken a long time, but I know inherently if I do not, you know, keep my gratitude journal every day, my yoga, my exercise, my clean eating, you know, I'll indulge here and there, of course, but it's not about going overboard because I know what will happen. Or it's not about saying, oh, I don't feel like it today. Occasionally that happens. Yes, it happens. And we take that time. However, it slides, and then you start to slide, and then you're going back into subconscious programs or that depression or that anxiety, whatever you happen to be dealing with. It's, it's a self-love practice. And I care to practice it daily. So be conscious of what you ask for, okay? Make a mental list. Make a detail— make details about every relationship. What's the description? Write it down. So I want a great relationship, and what does that look like? How does it look? How does it feel? What does it sound like? Here is one example: I love my caring, open-minded, affectionate smart life partner, and I feel completely supported during our quiet evenings, laughing and sharing our life stories and interests. I would say that, you know, Dr. Lipton and my relationship, very similar. I feel the same way. So I'm, I love being at home and I love being with family and cooking and gosh, just being creative, stuff like that. So try and, you know, and create that life. For yourself. Review your subconscious programming. So, you know, maybe you grew up in a family where their emotions were never expressed, like a loving relationship, or they were sharp with each other, like mean. Or maybe the marriage felt like your mom and dad, like it was a business. It had— especially, you know, if you think about your mom and dad or even your grandparents, a lot of them operated that way. So you're unaware of our subconscious behaviors, right? On occasion we do notice them. So, you know, how could someone as good as I be the source of the problem? So we need to ask the question, does my subconscious programming support my heart's desire? So you really need to feel like, yes, I deserve love, I am love. This is what love looks like to me. And then there's financial blocks as well that happen quite a bit. So if in your home you experienced like money meant tension, worry, or sorrow, and there was never enough, that's how you're going to operate at as well. And I can help you remove those blocks or fill those gaps of energy and reprogram. Reprogram. That's basically all we're doing. So no more limiting and self-sabotaging beliefs about yourself. Just you love yourself. And if you have to repeat that, stick it up, Post-it note it, whatever it happens to be, write it down a million times. Write yourself a love letter. Just thought of that one, then, then do it. Start reprogramming. And there's no one-size-fits-all. So just, you know, it's, it's all about, you know, new beliefs, self-help books, watching videos, going to get that help, whether it's through psychiatrist, psychologist, your doctor, naturopath, your therapies like acupuncture, massage, massage, reflexology, chakra balancing, cleansing, Reiki, tapping, hypnotherapy, and that's another good one. So, so yeah, just start reprogramming and, and start going towards things that make you feel good, that make you feel good. That's the most important thing. Start with what feels good. Make mindfulness a habit. So paying attention when you're slipping into automatic pilot, and your mind tends to do that. So observe your thoughts when you're doing mundane chores, or like driving or cleaning or whatever it happens to be. So, you know, just think about what you want to manifest. In your life. And mindfulness, like, you want to start bringing, you know, love, abundance, um, you know, just healing, health, wellness, um, and just, just make it a frequent, you know, practice, practice, always practicing, um. So in conclusion, a human mind is a wandering mind and a wandering mind is an unhappy mind. So it's about, it's not about having no thoughts. It's about, you know, if you pick up one that says I'm no good, you pick up one saying I'm fantastic. Just, it's almost like, you know, those ants, you just gotta ping them away. Hypnosis, as I talked about before, subliminal tapes. So it's a theta-driven experience which drives your imagination and reality. And children under the age of 7 are in the theta. You might want to Google that or look into that a little bit more. So it's, it's your brain activity. It's where it's that state of consciousness. And you can do that by again, healing frequencies, meditation, going to see a hypnotherapist and getting those programs installed. Finding messages, poetry, words, start pasting them all over the place, record them on your phone and listen to them before you go to bed. I mean, these are all ideas that you can, you can work on. Relaxation, Delta, you know, you've got your Delta waves, your Alpha waves, your Theta waves. So Google that as well. And find one that resonates with you. Energy psychology. So it's, it's all about— it's, well, it's also known as PSYCH-K. It's energy balancing technology. It's a 3D brain mapping. So you can look into that. Communication, communicating with others, communicating with yourself, like just asking questions. Like if somebody says something and you're like, "What? I don't think you heard what you just said. Did you mean that?" So actually bringing that up and then asking what's going on, making people aware, engaged. Don't come from a place of anger or frustration or hurt. Be curious. We tend as a society to react to everything and everybody. Wants to yell and scream their opinions loudly when not trying to come from a place of understanding first. Put your armor down, people. Put it down. Okay. Patience. Again, you're trying to change lifelong patterns. Change in relationship may not occur overnight, and there may be dysfunctional patterns. You have to have patience with yourself. Okay. So it's, you know, it's just about, here's an example. The boy gets into a dispute with a girl who doesn't want to talk about it. The girl, on the other hand, wants to dissect it. Yes, I'd have to say I'm good at that. That could be a recipe for disaster. She keeps talking and he keeps digging a deeper hole by being silent. When you finally come out of that hole, He's saying he owned the non-communication habit, was delaying resolution of the issue, and realized that she was trying to repair the potholes that were showing up in their lives. So it's all about him saying, okay, I need time. I need to calm myself, a cool place. He needs to think and just to disconnect. He's still listening even though he's not ready to engage. He asked her to be patient. So very deep insight and awareness. If you could speak to whoever you're in a discussion with, or maybe it's a heated discussion, to just tell them what you need, that you need some time. Can I circle back? I, you know, I need— and I would say 9 times out of 10, men need— I've raised 2 young men as well— need at least 24 hours. Sometimes a little bit longer, 48 hours to come back. It takes time for them to digest it, if that makes sense, interpret it, and, and just try to figure it out, I guess is the word. So, and then it's practice as well. Practice new habits. A habit is a behavior you practice until it sticks. All right. So practice, and then running through the chakras. I have a beautiful guided chakra meditation, which, you know, I— this is something I give out complimentary. If you'd like that, if you're on the replay, please comment below. I'll send that to you. It's a great way to just, you know, bring your energy in, hone it, bring it back to balance. And, and you feel so much better after. It's— sometimes we get attached to something and it's really hard to break from it. So this is a great way to break from that. All right, guys, um, I hope you enjoyed this episode. If you did, it was all about the honeymoon effect and how we have 4 brains in a relationship: the conscious and the subconscious If you really enjoyed this, please share this out. Give me a thumbs up, comment, you know, let me know where you're from. If this is your first time, a replay, say hello. If you have any questions, leave them below. I will respond, I will reply. If you are looking for a Reiki rescue reading, mediumship, any type of chakra energy Reiki work, Please feel free to reach out to me. I am always available. And next week I will have a guest all the way from England, so you will have to tune in then. I want to wish you guys love, light, and blessings. And please remember, healing begins where the ego ends. Take care, guys.