A monologue about feeling valued only for perfection and hiding your true self. The speaker traces how unsafe environments and betrayal create a cycle of concealment, especially when pain leads to impulsive decisions that deepen shame. Breaking free means risking judgment to be honest about who you actually are.
in some way, somehow, we've been unseen. Someone has only valued us from this outer shell of perfection and not who we really are. And so when who we really are shows up, we try to hide it because we want people to get the outer shell, the perfect, all the things. We've been in unsafe environments. We've been messy. We've been gossiping. We've been hurting people by betrayal and mistrust and sharing everybody's business. And so it's very difficult for people to trust again. And when we are in pain, we make some ratchet decisions. Can we just be honest? OK, sometimes we go a little ratchet. And when we make those decisions, when we are in pain— I didn't even know what you were saying. I didn't even know what you were saying at all. No, but I done been in the club making painful, ratchet decisions. And when we make those decisions, we feel even more like we need to hide. Because then when we tell people not only what we've been through, but what we've done, they'll discount us. They'll leave us. They'll judge us, and we don't want that. And so we go into hiding when we're in pain. And I am challenging people not to do it.
