Jennie Allen on Moving to Dallas (Part 1 of 7)

So Jenny Allen is on your couch.

So Jenny Allen is on Jenny Allen's couch. And I already told Jenny we just want to have fun and talk, but all inquiring minds want to know, why are you in Dallas?

Oh gosh, so it absolutely has shocked us that this is what God had. We planned on living in Austin for the rest of our lives. We had great community, we've been there 12 years. And with two younger— with four kids, and our two youngest have different special needs, and we were trying to plug them in everywhere, and it was just not working, not fitting. And my husband and I are pretty good problem solvers. Like, we think, okay, there's a problem, let's solve it. We work together and we figure it out. And, and we thought we were, and then all of a sudden we realized, okay, this just keeps like we're out of options without a move, without starting over in a new community, even within Austin. And so we decided that we, we love, um, our family, and if a move was going to be required and for the schooling, that maybe we should just be near to them. And so, um, so we're near to his family here and closer to my family in Little Rock. And it's good, it's great. I mean, you know, for all its stereotypes, I have to say The people are so kind. I mean, every person— I think we've gotten, you know, 15 cookies, cakes, and meals like dropped off with people, we, we neighbors that were, you know, just getting to know. And it just, it's such a beautiful, warm, good, amazing community. So we have loved it so far. We did not see it coming, but it has— it's been a pleasant surprise, I think, how much we, we all, all 6 of us. My kids too are loving it.

What are you most excited about, apart from this has been a great move for our family and all that, like just being in Dallas? Like, what are you happy to be close to, apart from family, like apart from that stuff, like the fun stuff?

Oh yeah.

What are you like, ooh, I'm in Dallas and so—

Okay, well, this is crazy that y'all invited me here today because I was like, okay, I am not missing that. That is heaven to me, like being around people I love. And so many people that are in the In the Christian leadership space, like, there's something really bonding about having fellow sisters that are in that. So I love that. I do like being close to you. I'm excited. And so there's that. I think there's a lot happening here. I mean, God is on the move, and I already feel that, and a lot of people have affirmed that, just saying it feels like that awakening of of real deep following Jesus is happening here. That there's, you know, it's already, we were post, you know, we're postmodern, we're so far back there in Austin, like everything was already post-Christian there. So to watch things here be at a place where they're realizing, okay, the norms of how everything's worked are changing and shifting. I think it's gonna be exciting, 'cause I think there's just so many sincere people that love Jesus and faith and wanna see, all that will be amazing.

Have you guys decided where you're going to church?

We have, kind of, at least temporarily. I hate to announce it right now, 'cause it's not certain. But I do feel like we are not in a place to church shop. We have to kind of jump in. We have 4 kids, 2 high schoolers. We need discipleship for our kids fast, and so, they had friends and community already in place at this church, and, and it feels like a good fit. So, um, I do feel like we're going to jump in, but I will be coming down here because we know this one pastor. I know, I know this one pastor who speaks to my soul and who I love so much. And so, you know, we have an African-American son, so I'm like, we've gotta, we've gotta be in that world, and, and we want to be around good godly leaders that are African-American, and your dad is among those, of course. So yeah, we will get down here.— Maybe that's why you have an afro.

Maybe that's why.

I did not know it.

You look like you had a question. I did.

I was just wondering, from the time you guys thought like, okay, maybe a move is the answer to when you moved, what was that? How much time was that?

5 seconds, because we were so desperate.

So it was either like she hid it, like she'd known it for a while and they just didn't tell everybody, or this was one week.

Before we announced. So within that week, maybe two, one week of should we do this, figuring it out, making calls, figuring out, okay, is— would this be good for each of our kids? And, and our son, who's a senior and having to move his whole life, I'm thinking, Lord, like, this— I don't want to screw, screw him up, you know? Like, this kid just— he, he's got lifelong friends in Austin, and he was amazing. We sat him down and said, we will stay. If you tell us to. Like, we're not leaving you.

You're not gonna go.

He was offered about 6 bedrooms because he's a good football player, so everybody was like, we'll keep him, you know, for a semester. Um, yeah, like, we'll keep him for his, you know, football position. But, but they also loved him. And, and so I was like, no, we're not doing that. Like, we all homeschool for a year if, if we need to. We're gonna stay. And he said, he said, Mom, I don't want to go.

But I will go.

Wow. And, and that was really strong.

Incredible.

And he's, and he's owned it. And even on the bad days, I've never felt like he's been resentful. And, and he should be, you know, I'm, I'm feeling like you should be. Um, but, but he's just, I think my kid, that kid specifically loves a challenge. He loves, um, he rises to that. And so I think all of this is a challenge.

Yeah.

And making new friends and—

and you know what you're teaching your kid that I love so much? You're teaching your kid that adventure with God, that going with him where he leads is sometimes unsettling in terms of what it causes you to have to walk away from and walk toward and the risk of it all. But I love— I've always loved that about you, just the adventure of following Christ. And I don't want to go, but I will. That's what you're teaching your son. Like, let's just do it.

Here's what was helpful too. None of us wanted to go. I mean, it was so weird. I was like, why are we doing this? None of us want to do it. So one, one person would be crying and it would make the other everyone else cry because we all were like— and then we would be going, well, let's not do it. But we didn't have answers there. It was like, there's not— I told my friends there when we had to tell them, you know, it felt like we didn't quit Austin, Austin quit us. Like, and it had been so long since God had led through a closed door, you know. It had been like vision, like— and I even wrestled with that. I said, God, couldn't you just tell us? Like, we listen to you, we follow you. Like, just give us a vision for Dallas. Give us give us a— we'll take it. Like, we're not against following you, even if that means giving up things we love. And, you know, he just was real quiet, but as he is. And so I was like, okay, well— and then what I think I realized is, no, this is one of the ways he leads. Like, sometimes it's through disappointment, that sometimes it's through hitting your face against a lot of doors and feeling like, gosh, my life isn't going the way I thought, even though I wasn't in disobedience. It was just, you know, it just— so I think it was cool. I mean, there were, there were, there were a few nights where all 6 of us were in my— our bedroom and, and crying together and praying. And, and I think I wouldn't trade those few nights for all the happy, comfortable—

but that really says a lot to me about the value that your son Juan places on your family being, you know, being together. And also that he places on you and your husband hearing God's voice and sensing authority. Yeah, and respect for authority, and then respect for you all's relationship with God.

You know what I mean?

Like, I mean, he— you offered to make this sweet for him.

Yeah.

And he said, that's okay.

He said, I trust you.

I trust that you know.

Yeah, that says a lot for you all's relationship. It says a lot for how he sees You all leading God. I mean, it just says a whole, whole lot. It says a whole lot. He's a boy. He's a senior.

Okay, so now tell us exactly how you did that.

Sounds like a lot of good spankings.

Yeah, that's what that sounds like.

Can we still say that? Yeah, we don't spank much no more.

Yeah, yeah. Now, I mean, he, you know, the kid was a— I don't want to throw him under a bus, but I think he would admit it. He was a punk for a long time. And then God rescued him. Like, God rescued him. And, and it was, it was amazing. And, and, you know, that's what I loved about the last few years watching him, because there were nights that I was up praying. And one specific night where I was like, God, I do not see these qualities in him, and it scares me.

It wasn't just—

it wasn't just he might rebel or make a bad decision. It was like, these are qualities that I don't want to send him out in the world without, like humility and compassion.

And I wonder how old was he when you—

this was like 15. This was like, because that gets a lot of moms hooked up.

Yeah.

And they're looking at their sons who are like bumps on the wall going, rise up, do something. Yeah. And so anyway, I, and then I saw a shift and, and I still, I don't know that he's articulated it or I could articulate what it was, but I, I know he changed. And what was interesting is that next year— and he's told me I can share this story— but then the next year he got caught for some things he'd done in the punk years, you know. Now they had happened back there, but it— he got caught one night, um, that I'm praying for him specifically. And, and I, I said, God, do what you have to do to show me that, that he's yours and that, that he loves you and that And the next day he got caught. And he went through about 24 hours of some pretty serious repercussions publicly. Like, just, it was really hard. And that night he came home and faced me, and he was emotional. And he said, I've been so scared to face you, Mom, because you taught me better. And I just want you to know I'm not that person anymore.

Beautiful.

And I said, baby, I know you're not. Like, I've seen it. And let me tell you what happened last night. I prayed that God would— by the way, that I prayed that, and he looked at me and he said, that means God, like, went back and grabbed these old things. And like, like, he saw that it was the mercy of God that he got mad at you. Yes. I need to tell you, um, but that was evidence of the Spirit that he wasn't He saw His mercy that God called him. So all that to say, I don't know what supernatural thing entered there, but it wasn't something big. I think it was just God captured him, you know?

And what I think something like that I feel like parents we struggle with is praying those hard prayers. Being willing to say like, Lord, like if it hurts her, for me girls, but if it hurts, if it brings her closer to You, still do it.

Well, yeah.

What was interesting about that specific thing was it was embarrassing, and that's why he was scared to face us, because everybody knew in the community. And so he was embarrassed, and I said, "Buddy, actually, I receive it. Like, just, if you love God more—" I mean, that's what we want. And he— I think it was like, "Okay, like, you really do care more about me than the image of us," you know? And I think they have to see that. They've got to know that they're not something to display to people. Like, they— because it was, you know, it probably was embarrassing at the time, but I knew it would change him forever. But it is hard. It's hard not to want to protect him and shield it and, you know, just— make it easy. Yeah.

Or rip their heads off when they embarrass you.

Well, yeah, there was that. If I hadn't prayed that the night before, then I think I might have.