Part 4 of 4: The Evans Women Discuss Homemaking and Growing Up Evans

I want to talk about, because you know, you've had 3 homes now, right? Am I counting that right? So every time you've moved, I mean, you've made a really conscientious effort to make your house a home. There are some things that you've done. Mom, same thing. You've lived in the same house for over 30-something years. What's interesting about where we are is this is, this is where you guys were. We lived here until I was 9.

I was 7.

Yeah, so we are in the house where we were when we were little girls. We shared a room, always shared a room. We always shared a room.

So now her daughter is in our room, is in our bedroom.

It's pretty perfect.

It's pretty, it's pretty perfect.

This is where they started Bible study.

The beginning of the church.

That became a Bible church.

Yeah, yeah, the beginning of the church. So you've had the experience though, being here, being in the house you are now, and of decorating, making it a home. Been through a remodel in your home. I'm a little decorating challenged and I'm begging Karris to help me. And she's like, I don't have the patience to deal with you and your changes. Cause I will change on somebody. But, but I want to talk about women who are like, you know, what does it take to make a house beautiful? Like, like what are the things that you think would be helpful for someone to know that's trying to, they're looking at all the things on Pinterest and Instagram and honestly we all are doing that and going, oh, that's pretty.

That's pretty.

That's pretty. But what does it take to put you in your home, and what are some things you've done to decorate your home to your standards, to your liking? How do you even discover what that is?

Well, first of all, you look at your budget.

There you go.

What season of life you're in. We weren't able to remodel our home until we were in the home for 25 years. I'm sorry, married 25 years. That was my first time remodeling, and so your dad said, "Okay, go for it." You regretted saying, "Go for it." Anyway, so you need to look at your budget, and depending on your budget, take what you have and have someone that's creative, has a creative eye, come in and move your things around.

Like a friend even.

Yes, like we have Rita Smith in our life. She came in and looked at my picture hangings, reframed them, and moved them around, moved my furniture around, painted the walls. Went to Hobby Lobby, all sorts of things. When she showed me the bill, I was in shock. In fact, I had to write her another check because I was so grateful. Yeah, grateful that she took what I had and then went to Hobby Lobby, Target, stuff like that, and just made our home homier and comfortable. And so homey, you know, Daddy's not into how things look. He's just—

we keep trying to get them to move. We're like, move, you should get another house. They're like, we're fine, we're fine.

He's not into You know, the home is my domain kind of thing. Lois, just work with it. But when he came home after Rita had moved what we had around and gave him such a small bill, he said, Lois, don't touch anything in the den. Because he loved how homier it felt. Even, you know, the Christmas tree, he decided where it would go so we not rearrange the den at Christmas. So it just takes work. But the point is, depending on what season of life you're in, what budget you have, and work with what you have and trust God for somebody that knows how to make what you have work.

I think that's a good point because I think we think we have to do it all. I mean, in your case, you may be able to, but you're asking Karris right now, I mean, you just moved, "When you come over to my house tomorrow for the Super Bowl, will you please go through these rooms and help me figure out what to do?" But how have you, how has that worked for you?

Just—

Partly that, just asking friends, what would be—

You have a great neighbor who has a good eye.

I do, I have a great neighbor with a good eye and just just direction. If you can just point me in a direction, and then sometimes, Charis will just text me a picture of, "This would look really great there." And just having that picture, even if I don't buy that exact thing, because it's not the right size or something, then something in this family.

Gives you an idea.

Yeah, if I can just get a family, sometimes that's really great, a direction. But I also think, like you said, we bought a home 4 years into marriage, and then we moved maybe 10 years in or something like that. Now we've moved one more time. And we have a ministry office, and I literally went through those spaces, like the house we were in, the ministry office, and I just started like going, okay, I'm gonna take that off the wall here and that off the wall here and that chair, I don't know where I'm gonna put that chair. And then we got in this house, I just started going through the rooms. I just, it's like shopping what you have. Like Mommy says, you just start looking at it new. Stuff that was in closets, you know what I mean, that I hadn't been able to use in our small little house where we'd been. I was like, let me put that Pull in the closet. all this out. And then I just laid it all out on the dining room floor and started going, okay, this would work in this son's room. And it was kind of fun. It's like Christmas, you know what I mean? Like looking again at the things that you have.

Yeah.

And I also think it's cool to look at pictures you've taken that are still on your phone, because some of those pictures, if you will print them in black and white or print them in sepia or I don't know what tone.

Yeah.

But print them like that and then just buy one of those black frames from Hobby Lobby.

Yeah.

Or white.

And then get 3 of them together, and your kid or your dog or whatever you love, and then just put those together. It's like art without paying the price of having bought art. It's just your stuff off your phone.

And then, I'm sorry to interrupt you, and then frame scripture. Yeah. Deuteronomy talks about scriptures being, if you have children, Deuteronomy talks about hanging scripture everywhere. Guys, hopefully remember there were scriptures in your bathroom, everywhere. So scriptures still could be framed and hung in your home.

Well, I was going to say, one of the things that I think we— Mommy did really well is we were the art, like the pictures of us. Yeah, the graduation pictures, the diplomas, the drawings as we were children. I mean, even now, you just texted me the other day and said, can you get me a cardboard cover of your book? Because on the mantle, yeah, my mom is putting our achievements, like Anthony— was it a Billboard Award for his album?

Yes.

And then, um, you your movie, the poster from your movie. So even now, your family and the family's pictures, their portraits and their accomplishments, that's the art. So it doesn't have to be, you know, and it could be, but just using what you have, like you said, on your phone, just print the picture and just put it on the wall, or you've got canvas on your wall of your kids.

Costco prints canvas.

Costco prints great canvas.

Oh, really?

So you don't even have to frame it, they'll just print it on canvas.

Put it on the canvas. And you've done that. You put your 3 boys.

Oh, nice.

Over time, like you have 3, maybe over 3 months.

I have a question.

Yes.

I would like to know, how do you keep your stress level down with the fact that you've got all this white, crisp Joanna Gaines Magnolia gray? I mean, it's so perfect, but how do you plan to keep your stress level down with the fact that you have a 2-year-old and a baby and everything looks so great, but Cause when you were talking about white cabinets and white chairs, we're looking at you, but we're looking at each other like, mm-mm. So I just wonder what's your take on how— Yeah, but not even keeping it clean. It's just like, I think people look on Pinterest and they get— it seems unrealistic. It seems unrealistic that I can live in a house with a white sofa and—

You're still confused.

I'm still confused.

So talk to me. She had a white sofa. She has had a white sofa. Yes.

I no longer have a white sofa. I have a leather sofa now because of that reason.

Okay, but so they're small changes.

In general, everything is crisp and—

Yes.

Okay.

Well, it's done mindfully. So like our walls, I would have really loved for them to be a flat paint color, but flat paint colors are really bad for kids.

Oh, Chrystal Hurst is home.

Yes, yes, yes, and all that.

That's true.

So they're eggshell, which means that if she gets her oily fingers, I can just wipe it off.

Oh, okay.

So it's still the color that I would want it to be.

Somebody didn't even know that there were different varieties of white. Once you choose the color, you can choose the finish.

Yeah. And that's why you need a friend to say, don't get that.

That's why you need a friend to say, don't get that. We know it's beautiful, but you can't keep it. Yeah.

So it's just, I make those kinds of choices in certain areas. So I still have something white, but instead of it, I have a white, big fluffy chair, but instead of it being like in the main living room, it's in the office that has doors that Ellie won't go in very often. So still have it with the lipstick, which we found out this morning. Exactly. So I still, I guess, choose to have the things that I like that give me that feeling, feeling, but just putting it in certain places or doing like a small change so that it's not, you know, in areas with kids or—

and I do think it's important to note that she's done this really inexpensively and that's kind of the cool part because I think people see that stuff and they go, I don't have the money for that.

Really?

You know, Target is doing such a great job and IKEA are doing such a great job. They have $29.99, a whole little coffee table situation.

And I love Hobby Lobby.

Oh, Hobby Lobby is great.

Oh my goodness.

And they have those 50% off sales. At some point, everything in their store will be 50% off. Thank you, Hobby Lobby.

And don't forget HomeGoods.

HomeGoods is another one.

And Marshalls.

Yeah, Marshalls. And Target is just my favorite because I can make an excuse to shop for my home because I have to go get milk and eggs.

Yeah, I mean, you gotta go.

And then they put Chip and Joanna in there. Oh yeah, it's a problem.

And I would say like the last thing is just patience. Like, I thought when we got in here we'd be able to do everything and I'd be able to get all the fancy pillows I wanted and put up all the decor, but like, that's just not the case. One, because I have a 2-year-old. Two, because I'm about to have another one. And three, because sometimes budget doesn't always allow for you to buy everything that you you want to buy at one point in time. And so it's just been patience. Like I have a spreadsheet of like things that I want, which is hilarious for each room because yeah, you never have time.

I'm not, I never have time. Well, we homeschooled, so she's homeschooled, which is crazy that my adult daughter is sitting here, but I remember trying to teach her Excel and she was like, mom, my brain doesn't work like that. I tell you what, when you want to do your house and redo it on a budget, you will learn how to work Excel.

That's very good.

Yeah.

So I just have a running list of things that I would like for each room and money becomes available, I ask Josh, like, hey, can we afford to go ahead and do this? And yeah, so it's just been a slow accumulation of the things that I want instead of getting things that are super under budget that I really didn't want in the first place and not being happy with it. Like, just being patient and waiting for the things that I want.

Yeah, young lady your age, yeah, learning to wait. Yeah, you know, for the next season. I call it the season in life, you know. Yeah. We're so used to immediate gratification that it's kind of hard to wait, you know, but it's so important to learn that.

It's hard to wait, but then it's worth it once you get what you wanted the whole time.

Josh is in the background making all kinds of— That's growth. That's growth. That's growth. We've come a long way, folks. We've come a long way. And he's gonna hold me to it.

I know.

Last question. One of the things people always ask us, you know this, what was it like growing up Evans? Which for 10 years of your life, I was a single mom. So you had that growing up Evans too. What was that like growing up? And then what is it like as an adult being an Evans?

What does that mean?

I got the good side.

You would show up and be like, you can't do nothing because my grandfather was a pastor. I was like, whoa, I didn't mean that.

I mean, that was horrible. I just keep the good side of like, Nani was older, so, and the kids were basically gone.

Yeah, you were like an only child.

Yeah, it was like an only child.

Yeah, we still have to remind her she's really not the fifth child.

I am the fifth child. But no, I think I got probably the good end of the spectrum.

Probably.

You got the—

yeah, just in terms of like, I had a grandmother who was old enough to be my mom, kind of. Like, I just like, you were really young. When I was young, and so when I was at your house, I didn't feel like you were my grandfather— my grandmother. It just felt like a second mom and dad. And so growing up Evans was just fun.

I don't know, it was fun.

It was fun.

She got everything she wanted.

Yeah, yeah, that's important. I remember that Christmas where everything under the tree was for her. Yes, you were like, the tree is exploding and there's only one person's name on all of the gifts.

Poor Jonathan.

Go ahead and get Ellen, just bring her out. Ellen, what is growing up Evans for you? What is it?

A lot of rich tradition. That's what it is.

It's a lot of rich tradition.

It's a lot of choices. Now looking back, I realize—

Intentional choices.

Were intentional. They were not like, oh, we just happened to have dinner at a table around the table. It wasn't that. It was mom and dad going, we gonna have dinner around this table. We're gonna make actual food. We're not gonna drive through places all the time.

Yeah, sure, sure.

And you didn't make dinner every day, but you made dinner and—

Enough. Yeah, enough, right?

And then, you know, I think people think we were just like, "Oh, kids sitting around the table." No, we were joking while Papa was doing devotions. Yeah, it was exactly what you would think about 4 small children and then having to make us sit down and they're exhausted because we won't be still. Exactly what happens at your house is what happened at our house. That's why I appreciate even more how intentional they had to be to keep doing it. Because sometimes you just want to be like, "Never mind." But even when it was hard, they did it anyway. They just did it anyway.

We may be frustrated, but they did it anyway.

Yeah, just did it anyway.

It anyway. So yeah, yeah, and I'll add this one thing. Other than it being fun, I feel like I did not realize that it's not the norm for everybody to be extremely close with their family. Yeah, I didn't realize until like college that like people don't talk to their mothers every day. Like, why, why are you ignoring the phone call from your mother? Why don't you talk to her every day? Or like, I just, I don't— and even like aunts and uncles like I've seen other families, like it's on special occasions that everybody gets together with their aunts and uncles and cousins. With us it's like every Sunday, like yeah, yeah, once a month for sure, but there's always something happening where everyone is together. And so I don't—

as I'm getting older, I just realized you want to go into nap, except you didn't nap. Hi, Ellie!

That's Ellie.

You want to wave at the camera? Wave! She's like, which camera do I look at? My daddy has 5 cameras.

Like, is this camera A, B, or C?

But you have to smell a diaper. Oh, did you cook, Nellie? Did you cook on it? She's like, don't tell everybody. Mommy, you cooked every Sunday. We woke up Sunday morning to the smell of pot roast or something going, and I think that that's one of the reasons why we still to this day gather around Sunday meals because You created that moment for us, you know. So thanks for doing that.

Oh, my pleasure. It was a joy.

Because really everything that we continue to do is something that we've seen you do. I mean, Daddy too, but a lot of the infrastructure, the meals and those kinds of things came because you were doing them. So the getting together, I remember vacation, remember Mommy used to put those American traveler's checks in her purse? Because like Daddy was driving, but you were making sure we— okay, Tony, we've got to stop. What are the—

you know, making sure.

Oh yes, all of that. Yeah.

So there's the framework of a lot of what we've been able to experience as Evans is because of you cooking and budgeting and all that stuff.

So it was really amazing that God gave me 14. I was just, you know, I wanted 12, but then you wanted 12 kids. I missed that. I know, that was before, you know, starting on that journey. But then biologically, my doctor said you need to stop at 4 kids.

Did you know that, Priscilla, that Mommy wanted 12 kids? Priscilla, did you know Mommy wanted 12 kids? No, I didn't know Mommy wanted 12 kids.

Yeah, but anyway, you know— Well, that's on video. Now you know it's a real thing.

Yeah, right. Trying to do videos with the kid who won't nap and actually has dirtied on herself.

She's still shaking.

Well, anyway, we will end it here because Ellie needs to be changed. Chrystal Hurst got to go to a kid's basketball. She probably needs a nap. Daddy's waiting on her.

He's waiting on lunch.

Daddy's waiting on her, right? He's waiting on her at home. My husband has texted me 5 times like, where are you? So on that note, we'll say bye-bye. Bye, Ellie. That was great. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Goodbye.

Bye-bye.

Thank you, y'all.

Everybody wants to know if I still have a grandmother name. Look, Ellie. What's her name? Uh-uh!

No, what's her name?

Um... Who's that?

Erika! Who's that?

Nani!

What's my name?

Gigi!

We'll fix it eventually!