Chrystal Hurst explores whether friendships that feel toxic are actually exposing your own unresolved issues. Before calling a community harmful, examine whether the discomfort comes from your expectations or sensitivities. Community can mirror back what you need to work through.
I've heard women say women are difficult, you know, it's too many catfights. And so when it comes to the part that community plays in the development of our wellness, soulful and full wellness, when someone is struggling with that and they want it for all the right reasons, what counsel would you or do you normally give?
It goes back to that awareness thing because everybody's not off. Are you aware that community offends you? Uh, because you're walking around looking at everybody in the lens of offense. So it's not, it's not always, I can't find it. It's gonna make you uncomfortable, and you have an expectation of community, and if it doesn't come at you the way that you think it should, ah, it's not healthy for me. It's amazing to me how many people call things toxic and unhealthy. This is a question I always ask: is it toxic Or did it expose your toxins?
Mm.
See, because there are a lot of sisters I've met— I don't like to sweat, but sweating is releasing toxins. Sometimes if you're in a community and it makes you sweat, I'm uncomfortable. Yeah, but toxins getting out. So I think you just really have to be aware. Is it me?
