When the Year Didn’t Go as Planned (This Is What To Do Next)

Have you ever ended a year feeling like you were behind on something that at the start of the year you felt so confident about? Or maybe you had plans and the interruptions you did not expect at all. And so you're feeling not only behind, but disappointed in the year that you've had. Maybe there's a part of the year and you know exactly what it is. If you could rewrite it, redo it, if you could change it, you know that that would allow you to live the year that you actually wanted to have. What's the biggest gap between what you've imagined and what's actually occurred? If you are like more than 90% of the people alive, you are feeling at the end of this year like, dang it, something didn't get done. And I want you to know that you're okay. So what do you do when you are looking at your year and it didn't go quite as planned? Well, let's talk about that today. The majority of what you're able to do in this world, in your life, is not about what happens to you. It's your attitude about it. We are all motivated when we see people that are missing a limb or people that have had some terrible tragedy or somebody who's fallen down in the middle of the race. We admire people who are able to overcome that and still do something with their lives because it's not about what happens to you. It's about your attitude about it and what you choose to do despite what happens. Why is this so important for me to tell you right now? Because Stuff is going to happen. Your plans are going to be interrupted. As much as God loves you and wants you to experience not only his goodness in your life but his purpose for your life, life is going to happen. Take a deep breath, breathe out, and say to yourself, it's not just me. Life happens to us all. So when you start to feel in your feelings about what didn't happen the way you thought it would, or what you weren't able to finish, or what you weren't able to achieve, and you start to feel yucky about it, let me tell you what that feeling is. It's shame that you said you were gonna do something and you didn't, that you said you were gonna finish something and you didn't, that you said you were gonna accomplish something and you didn't. And let me tell you what will throw you into a tailspin. Shame. Guilt says I did something bad. Shame says I am something bad. And the shame associated with, I'm not a person who does what I say I'm going to do, that identity issue will now start to cloud your ability to see what's possible going forward. Because when you start wearing the shame of, I can't believe I didn't do that. I just didn't finish that. And you start interpreting and internalizing, I'm not a person who finishes things that they start. Guess what you start becoming? A person who doesn't finish things that they start. So the first thing is to recognize the feeling of feeling bad about your year and release it. Your year is not a fail. You simply lived a human story, and most people have their year interrupted. Your steps are not even completely ordered by you anyway. Psalm 37:23 says, "The steps of a man are established by the Lord when he delights in his way." He also says, when it's not perfect, and you're feeling like, I can't do it, 2 Corinthians 12:9, his grace is sufficient for you, and his power is made perfect in weakness. Here is the Message paraphrase: My grace is enough. It's all you need. My strength comes into its own when you are out of options, when you are feeling weak. So we often assume that our unmet goals are personal failure. It's something about me. But sometimes life interruptions, because your steps are not fully yours to order, are God ordained interruptions or invitations. They're God-ordained. I tell the story often about how, gosh, almost 15 years ago, when my husband first began to have some health challenges and we had to go to lots of doctor's visits, that gave us so much time to sit in the car. And in between doctor appointment A for the day and doctor appointment B for the day, we had to eat lunch. We had all of a sudden all these dates built in. Even this year, with the turmoil of the year that we've had, there's been so much togetherness because of travel and seeing who we needed to see and going where we needed to go. And that is unexpected, unplanned for, but it also is a blessing. And there's always a silver lining if you look for it. A year from now, you look back, but even in your unexpected setbacks, there is silver or gold lining. Your life can be a mess and still be a masterpiece. When you are going down the street for GPS and you miss a turn, GPS doesn't shame you and say you're a terrible driver, you never are going to get to your destination. It recalculates, and God does too. Often though, we are the ones that need to agree with the recalculation, because God is calculating and recalculating for us all the time. We just get whiplash when we feel like, man, that was sudden, and maybe it was, But if God knew it was going to happen, if he knew he was coming, maybe it wasn't. You and I need to start embroaching upon, embarking upon every year with a plan and looking at that like GPS. This is the direction for how I get from point A to point B. And also, when you offer it to the Lord, commit your ways to the Lord and he will direct your path. Say you have the right to interrupt this, because then when he does, when he allows life to interrupt it, you can say, well, it was only my plan submitted for approval anyway. That changes your ecosystem. I didn't mess up. I didn't do the bad thing. I mean, even if there is room for personal culpability and accountability, like to say to yourself, this is not a definition of who I am. This is just my experience. And the year's experience for 2025 may be completely different than 2026. So release the shame, reframe the story. Okay, reframe the story. Progress in our lives, we want it to be linear. We want to say from point A to point B and from point B to point C, and that we take every step as the next stepping stone to get where we want to be. If you're trying to lose weight and you lose 10 pounds, you want that to just keep going. Do you ever think when you're trying to lose weight, if I want to lose 30 pounds and I think I can lose 5 pounds a month, so this will take me 6 months to do, there might be a month in there where because of trouble I may actually gain back 5 of the pounds that we lost? We don't plan like that. We don't say, "Well, I'm gonna leave myself room for a gain back." We don't. And progress is rarely linear. You go to college, you wanna get a graduate degree, and that's fine. It'd be amazing if you could just keep going for your doctorate. But often, people certainly hit a point where, "I actually got bills, and I may need to pause and work for a minute." And that's okay. Your progress is layered, and it's hidden, and it's holy. Your progress is holy. Because your steps are ordered by God, and how you think you're supposed to get there isn't the only way that you can get there. And often what God is doing— and we've been reading through and studying Exodus— is allowing us to experience life in a way that when we get where we're supposed to go, we actually have the strength that we need. Do you know that often if you were to go from point A to point B quickly and clearly, you wouldn't be ready for point B? Often I look at my life and I think, Some of the, the ways I've had to grow as a leader, as a boss, as a business owner— there are things that have happened in 2025 that had I had the success or the ability to, to grow things in 2018, I wouldn't have been ready. Your progress not being linear and a step back and also a step forward is a part of the way of the Lord. So if it didn't turn out like you thought it was supposed to, be thankful. God, thank you for the lessons I learned. Thank you for what I learned about myself. Thank you for what I learned about my people. Thank you for what I learned about business or about money. And if I have to have a hard year in order for me to be ready for the blessing of God in the years to come, so be it. I want personal accountability, but I refuse to own, well, it just must be me. It must be something I can't do. And I have to watch my language. Let's watch my language. I was listening to somebody the other day, I can't remember who it was, but they were talking about how they started doing events and the events started out small. It was like it was only so many people and they were barely in the black. And I said to myself last year, and probably even the team has heard me say it, I just don't know if I should be doing events. Maybe events are not for me. See, that's an identity statement rather than was it learning. And, and maybe I shouldn't be, but what I shouldn't do is decide. I shouldn't own that as an identity that events don't work for Chrystal Hurst. So we have to resist the urge to identify a failure or a non-expected outcome with our capacity in the future. A lot of it, y'all, a lot of it, y'all, is building strength, muscle capacity, endurance, wisdom. And instead of being disappointed, reframe it. Okay, Lord, I don't know what you're going to do with this in the future, but thank you for the lessons that I learned. I was with a lady this weekend who was talking about growth and development and, and the ability to have financial capacity, and she said, the reason why I teach these classes at church is because we were in so much debt. We were in so much debt, and the Lord taught me about money. And because I know, I know what it is to write that last payment and to write that last check and to not owe any person, because I now know this, this is what I do. Failure is also the opportunity to fail forward. Don't despise small beginnings, whether they are small in effort or small in failure or big in failure, because the Lord sees work work that can be done. Zechariah 4:10. He will finish the work that he started in you. Philippians 1:6. He causes all things to work together for the good of those who love him and who are called according to his purpose. If you keep sticking with God, he wastes nothing. Psalm 90:12. You want a heart of wisdom and you want to number your days because you want to be conscious of your time on this earth and what God wants you to do. Don't overlook the small things though, because many of the things that we're working towards, God is like, I'm actually not concerned about the outcome, I'm concerned about working things out in you. You're concerned about the about the outcome. I'm concerned about you. So when the year doesn't go as planned, don't inherit and ingest the shame, and be willing to reframe the story knowing that God doesn't care as much about the outcome as you do. Because don't you know that he can achieve his outcome without you? He can achieve the outcome without you. So the reason he's doing it with you is to change you. It is to grow you. It is to develop you. It is to stretch you. It is to make you something you did not even know you be? Because if it was just the outcome, he can do that a million different ways. But because he wants to do it with you, he has to grow you. And sometimes growth requires interruption. What if your interruptions this year— what if the unexpected, what if the hard things are a part of him building you? And just because the fruit isn't visible doesn't mean that root work isn't happening. Some years are planting years, and you just don't see anything budding or sprouting or changing. And we just live for the harvest years and we're disappointed with the planting years because we don't see anything. As I mentioned before, 92%, so over 90% of people never reach the goals that they set out for at the beginning of the year. Why? Because goals assume predictable circumstances and life is anything but predictable. Hey there, I hope you are enjoying this podcast. I'm breaking in because I want to make sure that you know, in the Inner Circle in 2026, We are focused on remembering you. That's what we're doing to kick off the year. Why? Because the whole year is about abundance and overflow. And before we can get to what's available, we have to figure out where you are, where you are with what you hold in your hand, your gifts, the opportunities, and the things that God has put in your heart and in your life to do. So if you want to do that work with us to excavate what's actually available in your life that you can offer to God for what he wants to do in the future, come You can join me in the Inner Circle where we can remember you. You can go to thesistercircle.com/innercircle to find out more about supporting the content that I put out there while you also put yourself in a situation where you can grow. I hope to see you inside of the Inner Circle in 2026. If you cut down a tree and you look at the trunk of the tree, you're gonna see the concentric circles that make up every year of growth that the tree has had, and the rings inside of a tree trunk indicate growth. It doesn't stop even when there are years of drought, even when there are years where it may not be cared for, even when years where a branch falls down. And each of the rings is unique. Each of the rings is different, but growth was always happening, albeit slow. And growth is always happening in you if you'll just stay planted. Release the shame. Make sure that you're reframing what you put in focus. Think about what could be happening in the story that you're not even seeing. And whatever you do see, thank God for it. And then you wanna restart with God, not with guilt. We don't want to start this year thinking about and planning for the new year, looking at everything we didn't do in the year that we're just getting through, and then trying to cram it into the new year. We're not doing that. We're going to start not with guilt, because that's guilt, that's operating out of guilt. We're going to start with God. Clean slate, new focus. Some of the things may carry over. God, but what do you want in my life this year? Because resetting is spiritual, it's not shameful. Isaiah 43:19, the Bible says, "I am doing a new thing. Now it springs forth. Do you not perceive it?" Commit your ways to the Lord so he can establish your plans. God is doing something new. Forget about what happened. Don't keep going over old history. I'm about to do something brand new. You are always growing. You are always developing. You just want to participate and be intentional, but participation doesn't look like figuring it all out on your own. It looks like inviting him into the space of you planning. So what does it look like to be spiritual in your planning, spiritual in your goal setting? What does it mean for you to move forward and not leave God out? Resetting can be small. Um, resetting can look like fasting. Resetting can look like restarting one thing that you stopped doing, that you start again. Maybe it's going walking or going to the gym. Resetting can look like sitting in silence. God, I want to hear your voice. Resetting can look like decluttering, getting all the stuff out that doesn't serve you so you have room for what God wants to do in the new year. Resetting simply looks like, God, I'm creating space for you to join me here. I'm creating space for you to join me here. Because a fresh start is not dependent on a calendar, it's dependent on your relationship with the Lord. So January is a good calendar time to hit the reset button. It's not the only time. Journaling, prayer walking, one step, one habit at a time. Start where you are, use what you have, Do what you can. As we come into January, we always do a 1-week fast at my church. We call it Psalm Assembly. And we used to say, don't eat after 3. It was very specific. Now it's kind of like you choose what you want to abstain from. I'm actually thinking about putting that as a component into the Inner Circle. Choose what it is. It could be a digital detox. It could actually be food. It could be from talking to certain people or from, you know, social media. It could be from sugar. It could be from the drink that you drink every day. It could be a lot of things. But there is a spiritual component to this where you make room and say, "God, this is your territory." It's like when Moses met God at the burning bush and God told Moses, "You're standing on holy ground. Take off your feet." Recognize that this is a different space. And so, what are you gonna take off or turn off so that you can hear clearly? And I think that that's important for you to know. Planning and thinking with God and committing your ways to him, that means you have to create space where you can hear him. And many of us struggle because we want to put all these plans together, but we're not hearing. We're not hearing at all. So let me give you some practical encouragement for what this all looks like, because, you know, I'm the queen of let me give you the bottom line and the principle, but how can we do this? So number one, you want to reflect honestly. What worked? What didn't work? Be honest. Like, what actually happened? What made this year something that where you were able to do what you could do and not able? Because some of that honesty you need to bring into the next year. If you are still caregiving and that's what threw you off your game this year, if you're still caregiving next year, adjust your expectations. If you thought you were going to pay off your debt but then you got laid off, that's what happened last year, adjust your expectations. If you and your husband were supposed to start counseling and you never did, well then this year you're not starting where you would have liked to, adjust your expectations. Release gently, release the disappointment, give space to it, give honor to it, but say, I release it. This is what was my fault, this is what wasn't my fault, but I receive that the mercies are new every day and I refuse to allow this be something that I wear a badge like the Scarlet Letter. I can say I was disappointed. I'm gonna acknowledge that, and then I'm gonna release it. You release unexpected expectations. Come on, girl, be realistic. You want to know one of the best ways to do this is by taking your plans and having somebody else see them. Girl, these are my plans. This is what I'm thinking about for the year. Do you think I'm overdoing it? Ask. Release the need to catch up. When you restart, restart with intentionality. One thing, y'all. One habit, one priority, one action that you can begin with. Keep it simple. Because most of us start out the new year and the gyms are making so much money off of us because I'm going to lose weight, I'm going to get fine, I'm going to have a rock solid body. Sign me up for your crème de la crème premier gym membership. And then in March, you've only been twice. And why do they run all these special deals? Because they know that this is what you're doing. You're not taking small actions, you're taking big actions and making sweeping changes that as of yet you haven't even been able to sustain on your own. I'm not saying don't get a gym membership, I'm just saying if you do, be realistic. Choose one thing so you restart intentionally. Acknowledge how you feel about it and release it gently, and then reflect honestly. How did we get here? So let me ask you, how did you get here? How did you get in debt? How did you get estranged from your husband or your best friend? How did you get back to this weight? How did you get a house that was cluttered? How did we get here? How did we not go back to school or not make a passing grade? How did we get here? Reflect and take that knowledge with you, not the identity, but the knowledge with you into your thinking and planning for the year to come. So I'm curious, as you've listened to this, which one of these takeaways meant the most to you? Is it that you need to restart with God and need to stick a pin in some things so that you can hear clearly? Is it that you need to reframe the story, that maybe God is doing something that I can't see? Or is it that you need to release the shame and how your unmet plans have caused you to change identity, look at yourself incorrectly? Which of those 3 things is the sticking point for you? Tell me in the comments and feel free to go beyond that and give me more of your story. We're active in the comments. We want to see what you have to say. We read them, respond to them. You can even hit reply if you got an email telling you about this podcast to let me know what hit you. But here's what I want you to know about me as an ongoing recovering perfectionist, as a firstborn achiever, as in tell me how to win because I'm super competitive, um, as a very judgmental person— and if you're judging on the outside, that means you're judging on the inside— as that kind of person who is interrupted and has been interrupted for the last 15 years with my own health issues, or health issues primarily with my family, from that regard, I'm telling you that if you can learn to do these three things— releasing the shame and reframing the story and then restarting with God— he takes everything and he does something with it, and whatever he makes is better than what you could have made up on your own. Your job is to keep bringing it to him. And that's why the end of the year and the beginning of the year is so beautiful, because we have a mark on the calendar that says, how did I do? And what am I going to do next year? So my encouragement to you today is to know the season that you're in. My son right now, my oldest son, has a job. And it's a job that requires his presence, but it doesn't require a lot of busyness or skill of hand to do it. He's got some extra little projects that require a little skill of hand, but for the most part, he is in a stationary position with a lot of time in his hands. And I said, don't miss this. There are people that would kill for a job where they could get paid what you're getting paid to sit there, and that nobody cares if they are reading a book online, if they are taking a course, if they are taking a class. You have time that you're getting paid for. Maximize it. So you can either see this as I'm bored and I have nothing to do, or I have an opportunity to learn and grow, and nobody cares as long as I sit right here. That is called reframing it. Don't miss the season that you're in, because I told him, listen, the next job you get, this ain't gonna be it. And you're gonna look back and say, I should have read more books, I should have taken more classes, I should have learned more new things. We don't want a case of the should-haves. And that means you've got to be intentional. So here's to you not identifying with shame. It's okay. A new year is coming and you need to release that. This is to you reframing the story and looking for where God might be building things you cannot see. And this is for you to remember that you should always, always plan and think and prepare and dream with God. Because at the end of the day, he is the one that will make sure your plans are secure. And he's not really interested in this year's plans. He's interested in your life. And that means sometimes he upsets your plans. So plan away. It's that time of year. We're doing all things planning. And also remember those 3 things: restart with God, reframe the story, release the shame. Go into 2026 with grace, with a plan, but with humility, because God always has a plan for you. Hope that was helpful. We'll see you next time.