In this monologue, Coach Melannie outlines two key warning signs that a romantic partner may be using rather than loving you. The first sign is when the woman only contacts you or appears in your life when she needs emotional comfort, such as a shoulder to cry on or someone to bring her ice cream, indicating a one‑sided, exploitative dynamic. The second sign is her consistent absence—physically or emotionally—when you need her support, whether she skips important events, is distracted by her phone, or tunes out during serious conversations. Melannie stresses that these patterns reveal a relationship lacking mutual investment and advises viewers to recognize these behaviors and consider ending such a partnership.
Chapters
Sign number 3 that she is using you is that she only shows up in your life or replies to you when she wants comfort. The sad reality is, is there are some very out-of-line women who just want somebody who's a shoulder to cry on, somebody to bring them ice cream when they're sad. It's inappropriate. This is not a 2-way relationship. This is a one-way relationship. She's just looking for someone to make her feel better, maybe feed her ego a little it, and then she moves on to the next thing. So if she only replies to your texts or if she only reaches out or if she only wants to spend time with you when she is going through a really hard time or is really sad, then it's probably a good time to run away. And this actually leads us into honestly one of the most important signs. This sign is that she's not there When you need her, she's really just not present in the relationship. This can mean physically. You know, maybe if there's, like, an event or something that you really need her there for or would like her there for, she just, oh, she doesn't have time. She can't make it happen. Or even just emotionally. Maybe you're in the same room, but she's always on her phone, or she doesn't pay attention. Or if you need to process something, work through something, talk about something, she just tunes out. She's not there. It's only a relief if both people are invested. Otherwise, it's really not a relationship. And so if she's not showing up in the relationship, if she's not proactive about the relationship, this clearly isn't working. And you certainly don't have to stay in a relationship like that.
