Wealth in Relationships with Dan Armstrong

Welcome. Welcome to Ladies Kicking Assets and I am here with my partner, Courtney Moeller, and we have the amazing Dan Armstrong here today. We have had some interesting pre. Pre chats, if you will. And I look so forward to talking about all of these things, but just a couple of house cleaning items. Courtney and I and Dan, we are diving in and we are strong in our fields, but we are not your experts. And I would ask you to consult your legal team and your CPA for anything that we might discuss today that you need further information on. Please reach out to all of us. We'll give you that contact information later. We ask that you would like and subscribe. And we are excited about talking with Dan today and everything that he has to share. So welcome, Dan and thank you for being with us today.

Thank you for having me.

You are welcome. So we, as we always do, a couple of minutes before we get on, we have some pre conversation and I just really want to jump into what I was not expecting was the colors that you see or that you align and associate with folks. That was super interesting. Can you share that? I've not heard this before.

Yeah, it's something called synesthesia. It's when different senses merge together that are sometimes in overload for me. When I. When I hear music, I see shapes and I hear colors. When I see people, I see colors. And so, you know, Courtney, I see as, you know, yellow and a green and they all. They all have different meanings. And you know, Robin, you're yellow, but you have. Orange is your main color and blue. So there's. And interestingly enough, I've seen people that I've talked to about this years ago and run into them again and I see the same color and they remember that and I'll. It's not like I'm. I can make it up. It's just there. It's like that's your name. That's just what it is. So it's easy for me to recognize people's personalities when I look at them. Within usually the first 10 or 15 seconds, I can pick up the color and then I know how to communicate with them.

Oh, that is fascinating. I look forward to diving a little more into that and really learning about that just to have self awareness. So you said people that you see years down the road, their colors don't really change. Do the colors mute. Are. Are there other colors that become more dominant or. Not really.

I. I did notice there was a woman I knew years ago and she had gone through a really bad relationship and her sister Second husband really brought out. Yeah. Brought out the life in her. And she went from a murky brown with a, A like surface yellow, which was the, the mask, to now like this. Much of her, just the way she appears is just bright. She's expressing herself. She still has the yellow, but it's expanded, it's been amplified because of the, the love that she's receiving from her husband.

Yeah, could see that happening. You know, when you kind of let go of some things that are holding you back and you step into new seasons of your life, I would think that some of your, your color aura or whatever we call it will, will be a little bit more dominant. You know, as we grow, that color then becomes to emerge anyway. Fascinating. Really. I love that. I can't wait to, to look at that. So I. We are all parents here. We have that one thing in common. And Courtney has mostly boys and one daughter. And I've got girls. But you have a house full of women. You want to talk about what that's like? Plus a wife. Plus a wife.

You know, it's funny, I grew up with a house of boys and I have four daughters. So it didn't seem to take long until they got into their, you know, adolescents teenage years where, you know, I started coming out of the shower and wearing my towel up to here, right. And you know, and I now I sit down to pee. I can't help it. It's just something that's normal. But you know, none of my daughters have ever talked back to me. They're now they're ages 32 to 22. They've, we've always had a great relationship where I allowed them to express themselves in their way. They're all uniquely different. Not one of them is loved more or less. We love who they are, how they express themselves and their talents, their skills, their personalities. They're so distinct. And I think as they're growing up, we didn't treat them equally. We treated them as they were meant to be treated. And they are all becoming very well rounded adults who again, express themselves well. Strong individuals. They do not let peer pressure. None of them have ever let peer pressure affect them. So they're very independent in the way they think and they love their dad. They still come to me and ask for advice and money.

Yeah, I don't know if that ever really changes. I guess it does shift just a little bit. But I love that they still come to you for advice. So your relationship with them has really shifted. You know, they're seeing with a lot of Wisdom and interesting to see how.

All of their personalities are so different. And, you know, I've had to deal. You know, when we've had issues or things, you know, each individual child, you deal with them differently because different things are effective. And, you know, I've got one kiddo that's super sensitive, and I have to be a little bit more cautious about the way I approach things. And I have another one that I can be really firm with. So. So it's funny how, you know, they grow up in the same environment with the same people around them, and they have such, you know, different personalities. And so I had really strong kids that didn't really succumb to peer pressure and things, too. I have one that's just going into high school, and I'm a little worried about him just because he is my social butterfly. But he's super respectful. He's a great kid, and we'll. We'll see how it goes. I always thought that I was going to get paid back for what I pulled in high school with my older kids, but they were both really good. So we'll see how Jaden's high school years go.

Well, your kids, you know, I think one of the things about the kids are, you know, when they're young, we're responsible for them, you know, for their behaviors and this and that. But when they get older, we're. We're. We're responsible to them. Yes, we're taking off that responsibility from ourselves, and they're responsible for themselves. We're. We're responsible to them. And it. That shift there puts more responsibility and maturity to develop on their shoulders instead of our own. So that's. That's kind of a mentality I've taken.

Yeah, and we really kind of started that shift in probably seventh grade. You know, I forced them to kind of, you know, start doing their own laundry. And, you know, if they have issues with their teachers or, you know, something going on at school, it's their responsibility to go and talk with them. You know, I had a. One of my high schoolers the other day, or I guess it was last year, said, you know, I'm thinking about switching to the. Another different class. And I said, well, go. Go talk to your principal. Go take care of it. I'm not calling them. You're. You're in high school. Go. Go handle it. So I think it's good for them to start learning to take care of their own issues and the things that they want to do. I'm not going to be there to hold their hand forever and they, they need to learn how to take care of that on their own.

Very, very true, very true. And so I'm just curious because Dan is. I really just started diving in and, and learning more about you. So first and foremost, let me say that I met you, Courtney. I believe you met Dan the same way through Kyle Wilson's inner circle. And so that has been just a powerful group to be a part of with so many amazing entrepreneurs, individuals. It's like a potpourri of powerful people in one space. So that's been really cool to be able to meet you and then to have some, some different one on one time just kind of visiting with you and, and learning about you. And, you know, a couple of weeks ago when we were at the Dennis Wheatley, you know, event that we were a part of, you and I just had some time to just chat and it was really, really special. So I appreciate those moments of conversation. And I'll tell you, I've. I've been diving in to your book, the Cable Guy here. I know, and I know that you also have smart dust, and I've not read that yet. Okay, okay. But I just really want to share this out of this book because I think this resonates so much with so many people. And this is in your introduction. I mean, I've got like little notes and stickies throughout this, but what you say here is just. And I think this like, applies to anybody in any workspace. What this book is about is three decades of walking into the homes of America and walking out knowing you did a good job despite what may have taken place in between. Is that not like what we've all kind of journeyed through, Whether that's been through real estate or family raising children. You know, we walk in and we're in this space and at the end of the day, we, we. We know in our minds and in our hearts by our actions and our words, we've done the very best that we could. And you know, I love, I love that because that's really like, applicable to anybody. And you said this, which I thought was really hysterical. You installed cable in the same day in a million dollar home and a $500 trailer. And you've learned to treat each customer the same, with respect. And how many problems in the United States right now and globally would we be able to reduce and minimize if we just treated each other with respect?

Yeah, if we bring that whole clause of the beginning. And at the end of the day, it's almost like if you bring it down to, like, if you expand it to the dash on our tombstones, you know, that dash we know nothing about on the tombstone, but yet that is what really matters. The birth and the death, we have nothing to do with. But we have everything to do with the dash. So when we're in someone's home, when we're in someone's life, when we are in someone's relationship or tragedy, that is where we. We give of ourselves, and we can really express, you know, love and gratitude and helpfulness and consistency of our character. And I think. I think we become. We become really selfish, where something that we do and we don't mean to do and other people do it to us is we want people to believe the way we believe. We're talking about America, so to speak, with the diversity. We want someone to believe the way we want to believe, and. Or. Or they want us to believe how they want to believe. And it's really selfishness that I'm expecting you to believe how I believe. Don't you see my point? Don't you see my point? Yeah, I see it. I just don't agree with it. Yeah, but you need to agree with it. Well, no, that's selfishness. That's selfish of me to expect you to just come to my belief system and embrace it. So I think if we're just careful to kind of just let you know. I'm gonna pause here. I had dinner with Kyle a couple weeks ago in my state here in Pennsylvania, and he brought to the table a guy from Egypt and a guy from India, and all four of us were really from different faith backgrounds, and there was no dissension. There was no arguments. One man would speak of his religion, another wood, another wood, another wood. And it was just a. Oh, that's interesting. Okay, how about nobody tried to convince each other. We just allowed ourselves to express. We loved and respected what was said, and we left there as friends. So I think if we stop this nonsense of trying to make someone believe what we believe, you know, express what we believe is true, and if it resonates with them, so be it. If not, just dust your hand, walk away, don't worry about it.

Yeah, And I think, you know, going back to that excerpt, you know, we have the ability to have an impact on people's lives. You know, we never know what they're going through or what's happening. And, Dan, I don't remember when it was, but at one point in time, we actually had a conversation about, you know, a gentleman's home that you had gone in and you had some kind of preconceived, you know, you had come to your own conclusions about what was going on. You know, the house was a mess and everything was disheveled. The gentleman was disheveled. And ultimately, you know, you came in and you were very kind and you had a major. It gives me chills. You had a major impact on this person's life. And, you know, that's something. You just never know what small little act of kindness or anything, you know, what that will do for somebody because we just don't know what they're going through. And, you know, last week on our way to football, we have this routine where, you know, when we, when it's game day, I've got my game day glasses and my gold gloves and, and we have our power songs and we dance all the way to school. And last week we had the people in the cars around us. You know, we're in there jumping around and dancing, and they were so excited. They were jumping around and dancing and they couldn't even hear our music. And, you know, I was trying to explain to Jaden that this was. I'm so glad that we have that routine. But, you know, we impacted others around us and, you know, set their day up in a, in a great way. And so it's, you know, that's a little bit different than, you know, going into other people's homes, but it really is. I have a sign on my computer that says impact because I want to have a positive impact. And you've had an opportunity to do that, you know, in treating everybody the same. And I, I have a firm belief in that as well. And that's something that I instilled when I was in the military. No matter if it was the commanding officer or, you know, the lowest ranking person there, I treated everybody the way I wanted to be treated. And it really is about making everything better and making the world a better place and having an impact.

One of the things I speak on so often, I. The, the, the topic is called be being aware of your presence in the lives of other people. If you're aware of who you are in their life and perhaps what a need that they have, and you're aware of it, you can have that greater impact. And that story you mentioned is in the book the the Adventures of a Real life Cable Guy, where a man, I was the last person to see him alive, and his sister came in to see us a couple of weeks later and was returning the equipment that he was Using. And we met, and I was shocked that it was what she was telling me, that I was the last person to see him. And I prayed for him that day because I didn't know what else to do. I was disgusted when I first met him, but then my heart broke. I realized I was judging him and had not known what he went through. And so he had passed away. And I was. I was. I had the opportunity to show love to someone who had not had it for a long time, and that impacted me forever. Forever.

Wow. It's funny how those unexpected experiences just come out of nowhere and. And have such a major impact on our. Ourselves. And that was probably a really great reminder. You know, being judgmental, it's. It's hard. That's something that I have to work on and, you know, kind of catch myself going, oh, Courtney, that's not your place to. You know, I don't know what that person's been through. I haven't walked in their shoes. And so that's something that I've been working on for. For quite some time, because I don. So I can only imagine that you really brought, you know, love and kindness and to somebody that needed it for that last little bit that they were around. And so. Wow. I. Wow.

Yeah. Well, you know, we. We see or have the opportunity to reveal to others just a glimpse of what we want people to see. You know, many times I found, even with myself, you know, you just put this mask of. Whatever it might be, mask of success and happy and, you know, all of this stuff and. And behind that is not what I might be feeling on the inside or, you know, conversely, I've, you know, and so I think all of that kind of goes back to, you know, transparency, you know, and.

You know, my parents were. Were very. They were great examples. I. In the book. I don't know if you're going to bring it up, but in the book Think Big, I first. That. That was that story I wrote in Think Big. See, I have it here. I wrote about. What's that?

Pull that book up. I have that on my shop. There you go.

Yes.

Yes. That's one where I. I wrote about, you know, my birth defect. I was. I was born with a cleft palate, bullied all my life, still have a prosthesis to help me speak, which most people aren't aware of. And then the other book, Next level, your life. That one. Yeah, there you go. That one. I talked about my. That one. I talk about my mother and what she did so many years ago. I Was in a band. I won't tell the whole story, but I was in a band and I wanted to go to Philadelphia to get some really cool stage clothing. She wanted to come along, so me and my brother, her and another friend, we all went. Billy. At the end of the day, she ended up giving away her brand new coat, took her shoes off, gave them to this, this one homeless woman, gave her the extra food that she was going to take home to feed my father. So she emptied herself of earthly possessions to serve this homeless woman. And I have told that story probably in 30 states and two countries where. And this, this next level your life has is in 10 countries as far as I know. And you know that that story of impact has never, has never wavered my faith in what I need to do to serve, you know, as a representation of God on earth. I need to be willing to be aware of my presence, but also act on it. Not just say, someone needs to do something about that. No, let's do something. Let's, let's make it happen. You know, we're only here for a little while. That's it.

Make that cash count.

Yeah, make it count. Make it count.

So good.

So true. You know, and I think the taking action part is where so many people miss it, no matter what that is. They've gleaned great education, they've been a part of all kinds of stuff. They have great thoughts, they have great desires, but it's the action thereafter. It's okay. Now proof in the pudding. Go, go, go do something with all this stuff or go do something with your convictions.

That's what you guys are doing with ladies kicking assets. I mean, you're taking your talents, you're pulling them together and you're actually making a difference. You know, it's like it wouldn't happen probably if you didn't come together and be aware of each other's skills and, and talents and communicate that together. So you're not just also work, working with the assets of crypto, real estate, financial education. You're also dealing with people's lives. Yeah, but when you're, what you're doing is making a huge impact. It's just not about, oh, they're helping me get wealthy. No, there's all kinds of wealth. There's wealth of character, there's wealth of information, there's wealth of knowledge, there's wealth of relationships, and all of that is combined in what you guys are doing. And really what we all should be doing is being aware of who we are in our world. And act on it accordingly to the needs of the people around us. So. Wow, that was long. Sorry.

No, but it was so good. So good and so accurate. I. I love that you said that. You know, we. We interviewed Ethel Rucker here, and we, you know, dug into, you know, the power of a strong marriage, and that is an asset. All, you know, relationships. All. All of these things are assets. And I think the more we talk about, you know, bringing value and impact and everything else, I mean, it really is. All of this is what contributes to true wealth. True wealth, to me is it's not just about money. It's relationships and impact and, you know, financial freedom and just. It incorporates, you know, a strong marriage and you. So much more than just having money in the bank.

Yeah. I mean, we all have bills, we all need to, you know, we all desire levels of passive income. That's all different, but there's so much more. You know, when Courtney and I quite honestly started this podcast, which will bring me to why we have you here. You know, we were essentially starting out with teaching women about financial education. And then we kind of looked at our audience and that had shifted a little bit. And then it was, you know, what really matters as we've navigated different experiences in our personal and business lives. And there's so much more as we're sitting here talking about. In fact, that's really where the gold is, you know, is. Is in this. And so that really is. At the end of the day, that's what's most important. And those are the, you know, those are the kinds of comments that we've also maybe gotten a few that weren't so kind, but, you know, kind comments, you know, about what. What. Who we're bringing on and. And what nuggets are being cleaned because it is impacting someone and. And, you know, impact and legacy is really so important, you know, at the season of my life. And so, you know, that impact, Dan, that you can share with others is pretty powerful. You know, just the fact that you were able to go into homes, different homes, over 30 years and treat everyone with respect, despite what was happening in your life, you know, you were that glimmer for someone else is. I mean, that's a gift, really. That's not your average person. You know, my cable guy, when he came to my house three weeks ago, didn't. I don't believe that was his mission.

That's interesting because I, over the course of my years in that field with my cables. Yeah, I trained a lot of guys, and I used To. As we were driving or working at a. Driving to an appointment or something, I said, okay, these are lessons in cable, but they're also lessons in life. Now, we start at the beginning. We do our very best with the signal that we have to work with. We use our meters to measure, monitor, adjust, and control. The same way we deal with people, we. We measure, we monitor, we adjust and control our attitude, our responses. You know, watch the reactions. Those are the bad things. The responses are much better. You know, a reaction. You hear a doctor, oh, you're reacting to this drug. Well, we all know that's negative. But if the doctor says you're responding to the medicine, oh, well, that's a good thing. So, you know, working with people over, you know, those three decades were. And day in and day out, I don't know how many people I actually met. I mean, I've met a couple hundred thousand people in my lifetime. And that also includes, you know, my. My days in the band and speaking engagements and just life that if. If I see. And maybe this is where the synesthesia comes in, that's been maybe a tool for me to communicate better. If I see someone, even if I don't understand their color or their shape about them, I know that they're unique. There's nobody else like them on the planet. You know, I was walking through the airport in San Diego to get to my flight a couple weeks ago.

Yeah.

And I sat down and I was drinking coffee, and I was just watching people. And, you know, Rob and Courtney, I watch. I bet you a thousand people and not one person looked like the other person. Not one. There were some similarities, but not one of them. I got off the airplane, landed in Philly, walking through the terminal, and I did the same exercise. I said, I live, like, pretty. Purposely and intentionally. I'm. I'm watching people for a reason. Not just. I'm just like, you know, living through a fog. I'm actually awake, and I'm watching their faces, and I'm looking at them going, no one is alike. We are all so unique. And these people don't know who I am, and I don't know who they are. And it's a big world, so we really can't worry about the big world. We have to worry about this world, where we are right now. And as we make that impact to where we are, we're aware of who we are in your life, my life. Then we touch you, then you touch them, and. And you'll touch people. I will never touch. I will touch people. You will never touch. But things that you have said to me, both of you, I can go, wow, that's good medicine. I'm going to respond to that and I'm going to give that medicine to someone else. And they don't even know where it's coming from, but it's exponential love and growth and you know, that energy that's just beautiful from all of us. And I think that's important. Instead of trying to change the world, just change your community, change, change your, your life first. And, and don't worry about the bigger picture right away.

All right?

One life at a time, you know.

One night at a time.

One life at a time. So, you know, you had mentioned a couple of different seasons of your life. You were in a band, you're a husband, you've been a father, you've been a cable guy, you're author, your public speaking. What is, what is next for you? Are you. I know you've got, you know, things in the pipeline or can you share?

Yeah, I can share a couple things. So I, I did just start a business. I have two businesses and I, I don't, I don't really tell people about them because I focus on my, my actual target audience. And the reason I do that, which I mentioned in the pre chat, that I, I don't want people to, I, to identify me with that business. I want them to just know me as a person because, like, I don't want to be caught in the identity also that this is who I am because those are things I do. Yeah, I am an author, I am a speaker, I am a husband, I am a father, I am a person of compassion. So one of the things I, I just did, I, I did an exercise. I was at Kyle's house and Laura Pattillo was there and she is a prolific author. She wrote 67 books in five years. And I was able to sit with her for a while and just listen to her with a couple other people. And she said, dedicate time every day and had a little placard right here beside me and said every, anyone can write 10 minutes a day. So I tried an experiment on June 2, on June 2, I wrote from 8 o' clock to 11 or 11 o' clock that night, three hours. And then I thought, okay, so I wrote it again and again and 25 nights straight from, from 9 to midnight or 8 to 11, because for me, these are golden hours. Yeah, everyone's quiet. I can put headphones on, phones aren't ringing, nothing's going on. And in 25 days. I wrote a book, and the editor just sent me the copy of it last night, said, hey, I'm done with your book. I love it. It's in a different genre than, you know, the cable guy or smart dust. One of the reasons is I'm still trying to find my expression as an author. Yeah, you know, even these are different, these two. And I. I also wrote a chapter for a book coming up with the Los Angeles Tribune that'll come out October. And Dr. Joe Vitale is writing the forward. And it's, you know, it's global. These books are global. All four of these books are on the global market. But they're just expressions of who I am. And you know, that. That when you ask, what am I doing? That is one of the things I'm doing. I'm looking for ways to express my art and my craft in a better way than I've ever done before. And I just had a birthday and I adopted a philosophy. Yeah, you were with me on my birthday.

Yes, I was with you on your birthday. We sang happy birthday to you. Take me back. It feels like a million years since then. And that was just, I think, three weeks.

Yeah, a couple weeks ago. What I did a couple of years ago, I brought this philosophy that I'm not. I'm not turning this age. I'm taking all the years behind me, putting into the next year. In other words, I'm not starting one year. I'm taking all these years behind me and putting it into the next year. Wow. What can I accomplish with all this wisdom, maturity, experience into my life this next year? Yeah, it's phenomenal. I signed a new lease on life. Every birthday, I signed a new lease on life because it just got better.

Oh, my God. I love that you sign every birthday. I'm taking tons of notes here, just so you know. Well, there are so many pearls of wisdom that we gather from these conversations. And I'll walk away and I just go, Courtney. And I go, wow. Oh, my God.

Did you. I know. I'm always texting Robin as we're re listening, and I'm like, oh, my gosh. There was this great nugget and this, you know, I end up listening to it several times before, you know, we end up airing it. And, you know, sometimes you things the first time that, you know, have a bigger impact the second time.

I know. Okay, so we are kind of coming to the end of our time together. Dan, how can our listeners and our viewers get in touch with you? What is the best way the best.

Way you can look me up on Facebook. I am a friend of Courtney and Robin's. If you're not on Facebook and you'd like to interact with me, I do coaching as well. The. My email address is Dan Armstrong, author.or@gmail.com danarmstrong author gmail.com Again, you can look me up on Facebook. Dan Armstrong. I think it's 5076, but again, you know, you'll see my face. Oh, something else coming up. I have a movie coming out October 20th where I have a lead role. It's an independent film, so it will be played locally. And then depending on where it goes from there, who knows? And it may just be at those places, but it was a fun thing to do. So I got the new book coming out hopefully by the end of the year. And of course, these other businesses I keep under wraps, but they're. They're moving along too. So I think.

What is the name of this movie?

How did you get.

Oh, I'll send you the trailer. I'll. I'll send you Survey. That's what it's called.

Survey.

Yeah. I'm a bad guy.

Okay.

I can't even imagine you playing a bad guy.

You're. You're gonna be shocked when you see the trailer.

So how did you get cast for this?

I. I know the guy. He did a movie before and I did a 10 second, like, real short, no, no lines or anything. And he got so many compliments about. Who is this guy? They thought it was Bruce Willis at first, and they said, who is this guy? So he wrote this, this movie. And he called me up and he said, hey, I don't know why, but I can't get you off my mind. Is there any way you could come by and look at this script and see if you want to do this?

Oh, my God.

I said, man, this is. This is not who I am. You know, this is a bad guy. And he says, looks like you, who's older. And I said, you know what? Let's do it. And so it's. It's a rap, it's being edited, but I'll show you the trailer. It's. It's. You'll be surprised.

I love this. I'm so excited. Yes. So we've had our first movie star.

That's right. That's exactly right.

Most unfamous movie star you'll ever know.

Oh, you're famous, Jen. You are famous. You are famous. Absolutely. Okay, so we talked about how our listeners and viewers can get in touch with you. We've talked about some. Some of these upcoming great things that you have happening over the next couple of months. I mean, the year is almost gone. I can't wait to see 2024 holds for you.

Yeah, I'm excited. And. And you know what? There's always going to be something, and I think when we keep that expectation open, we make a way for it to happen. When. When we put limits on ourselves, like, well, I. And we talk negatively, like, oh, I'm. I'm this, I'm that, and I'm guilty of it. But if we stop and say, you know what, look what I've done. Not like, not like in pride, but look what I've accomplished, you know, look what's happened in my life. Why not? Why can't it keep going? What. What's stopping me except death? So while I'm still breathing, you know, my last breath, I want to be caught up in some kind of project that, you know, that I, I'm passionately involved with.

I love that. Well, thank you so much for your time today, Dan. I've taken, like, two pages of scribble notes. I can't wait to go back and just. Time to sit and process your words. They're. They're golden. So we thank you. We thank you, listeners, for taking time out of your day for ladies kick and ass sets like and subscribe. And more on Dan Armstrong coming out soon. Thank you so much.

Thank you, guys.