A leader recovering from brain injury explains five human drives: control, competence, congruence, caring, and connection. He credits Denise and his community for sustaining him through it, and argues that leaders isolate themselves by hiding their struggles. The fix: ask for help and give it.
There's five baseline drives that we all feel as human beings. We want a sense of control, competence, congruence, caring, and connection. When I got hurt, when I was down, when I was damaged, I had a community of people who cared for me and connected with me and checked in on me over those two years of recovery with my brain injury. No more, no person more than Denise. She was the one person who knew what I was really going through and has always been that one person who really knows what my life is like. And so I hope you find that level of connection and love in your life and you get to share your life with somebody who really understands the ups and downs of a life of progress mode. Because you're probably that person in your family or your team, you're probably that leader. So sometimes when you're that person who's the big learner or you're the earner or you're the leader, you don't have people who know. No one knows your struggles. And that can feel very isolating. So don't forget that one of your human drives that will make you feel alive again is when you reach out and care for other people. You also let people care for you. You connect with people who care about you.
