A monologue by Brendan (uploaded by Daniel Borschel) that explains how fulfillment and wellness arise from internal practices rather than external status. Brendan emphasizes end-of-day self-talk, celebrating small wins, recognizing meaningful daily actions (household tasks, work steps, kindness), and using scheduling/time-blocking to build momentum and self-respect. He argues that repeated recognition of progress combats pessimism, discontent, and feelings of never being enough.
Chapters
Fulfillment doesn't come with the private jet. I know a lot of people with them, they're unhappy. Fulfillment comes with our self talk and the acknowledgement of what we are doing and where we are heading. It's a recognition and an appreciation of what our life is about and who we are becoming. Not just am I doing the perfect thing. A secret to my wellness routines is meaningful days and pursuits. Meaningful days and pursuits. Wellness to me cannot exist separate than meaning and fulfillment. I could be super healthy and fit. I can be resilient as heck. I can release all the tension in my body. But if I don't feel like the day or the series of days had some, some meaning or some magic to them, if I didn't feel fulfilled with the efforts I was putting in, if even if that went taking care of the home, taking care of the family, if that meant doing my art or building my business, if it doesn't feel like it matters and I don't force myself, please listen. I don't force myself to feel fulfilled, just like I don't force myself to feel grateful. Then I start going through the motions. And once I start going through the motions, it all blurs. None of it means anything and I become unhealthy. My thoughts go into pessimism, my thoughts go into discontent. My thoughts go into discontent and pessimism and negativity and then blondness and boredom. And so what I have to do, I have to force myself to be fulfilled. I have to. Literally at the end of every day I'm like, okay, what can I be happy about today? Okay, I didn't get as long as I as far as I want. I still have a huge to do list for tomorrow and the next five years. What did I do today? What? One little step I can just have a little bit of celebration, a little fulfillment from. At least you tried. At least you moved the thing forward. Give yourself a little credit today, Brendan. Feel a little fulfilled even though you're behind. I literally say those words to myself. So I'm not preaching to you. That's the practice your self. Talk about meaning and fulfillment is an advanced practice. At the end of the day, are you noting mentally and physically, mentally and verbally in your mind what you saw that you're fulfilled by and you feel good about? Even if you're still behind, even if it didn't go right, I'll honor myself. You were in motion, Brendan. You tried. You know what? You had those 40 items. You did two of them. Those two. They're really going to matter. Towards the next couple years, okay, you move that ball forward. Okay, not as far as you. Because, see, your discontent with how far you've come is stealing your sense of meaning and fulfillment. You don't think you've progressed far enough, so you dislike yourself, you question your skills or you hate yourself. That's mental illness. When we feel that we're never enough, does that sound like wellness? When we feel like we never give ourselves credit, nothing's ever good enough. Does that feel good? It feels terrible. A lot of people are literally emotionally, mentally unwell because they just don't stop at the end of the day, go, what did I do? Where am I headed? What can I be fulfilled about? What meaningful thing happened today? Even if you know what happened today, you're fulfilled by you made the kids a good lunch. You know what you're fulfilled by? You know, you're making your house a little more like you like it. You know you're fulfilled by, oh, you were kind to that person or you took that call, you answered that text. Oh, you know what you feel about. You finished the presentation, you got the video up, you did the launch. If you don't feel fulfilled on a consistent basis, don't blame what you're doing. Let me say it again. If you don't feel fulfilled on a consistent basis, don't blame what you're doing. Don't blame the job, don't blame the purpose. Like it's that old thing in Taoism and Buddhism. Carry the pale man, you got to be able to carry the pail, wash the dishes, live a normal life and feel fulfilled by it. Fulfillment doesn't come with the private jet. I know a lot of people with them, they're unhappy. Fulfillment comes with our self talk and the acknowledgement of what we are doing and where we are heading. It's a recognition and an appreciation of what our life is about and who we are becoming. Not just am I doing the perfect thing? And so what's your fulfillment practice? How do you make yourself satisfied and fulfilled with life? Have you ever given yourself that gift? Have you ever given yourself that gift on a daily basis? Or does it come every 10 years when you achieve something? Hopefully. I know a lot of people, they live a long time still chasing fulfillment as if it will happen to them versus a decision one day to speak to themselves differently. You want more fulfillment at work? Speak to yourself differently about the actions going on at work. Give yourself credit. Recognize the momentum, honor your efforts, honor the efforts of other people. Recognize the ripple effect of what's going to happen. The ripple effect of my career, I have no idea. But every day, every day I feel fulfilled by it. I did one more thing today. I'm going to feel fulfilled at the end of this day. Even though I've already thought of 40 things that I haven't said to you yet that I think I should say to you. I'm just going to be fulfilled with the session today. Put the stone in the water, the ripple effect will happen. Didn't get the stone exactly where I wanted it. Stone got in the water. You don't have to make a masterpiece every day. You got to get some oil on the canvas. Just get going. Just start and recognize yourself for those times. Recognizing and celebrating what you are doing, even if you don't think it's as big as it needs to be. That's mental health. I'll share something else that really helps me with this. And this is so key. Meaningful days and pursuits for me, I know this is going to bore you all to death, but for me, these meaningful days and pursuits come from having a schedule and a plan. I know no one loves this one. Brendan. I knew you were going to turn it to productivity. Dang it, Brendan. I have to. I have to. Because when we feel like we have momentum behind us, we do feel better. My wellness comes from a sense of progress, fulfillment in my life. But those things don't come from just showing up and self talk. They also come from knocking stuff off the list, man. And blocking time. When I have a series of weeks or months of empty time on my calendar, I know I'm not fulfilling God's potential. He put in my soul. I believe that if you are meandering your whole life, it's hard to feel fulfilled. And often people, even if they're doing good work, they don't feel they're optimizing their potential. And the truth is, sometimes that's true. Sometimes you look at their calendar, they're not doing anything, they're not scheduling. And I know that sounds so simplistic, but it's like, oh, I can. I know a lot about your life based on your schedule. I know a lot about your life based on your calendar. I don't know everything. I don't know your internal world, but sometimes I do because your calendar is saying what are you focusing on? What are you moving towards? And the meaningful days stack up when you feel like at least you move towards that thing, even if again, you didn't get perfect or progressed perfectly towards it. And so I have just got so many activities that are on the schedule. That's when I'm going to do it. I'm going to move it forward. I might not get it done, I might not get it right, but I tried in that slot of time and it builds self respect. I showed up, I did what I said I was going to do. I put the effort for self respect leads to that self efficacy, that self esteem, those things that give us confidence. And guess what? Wellness. When you have greater self worth and self respect from progressing towards things that matter to you, you are more. Well, I know you know Sa.
