You're Looking At Life The Wrong Way | How To Leave An Impact You Can Be PROUD Of

You showing up in full, doing what you're doing, and the people around you, they will see it. And when they see it and you have the conversations, you're elevating them. They recognize their own strength in their interaction with you. That's what I think legacy comes down to be. The legacy is in the lift up. That's our job, to lift ourselves and to lift those around us. The real win to me is that some people, they tend to go all in. There might be pain, but there's pain either way. Give your best. It's different. It feels different. There's self respect and honor and legacy in a different way. Give your best. Growth Day, number nine, the legacy. Some of you are with us and my main man, Mel Abraham, at coaching summit this month. I know many of you, we've been on the road together this month. And he was talking about, the legacy is not the things you leave behind, but the things you leave in other people's hearts. And I love that line. That's Mel Abraham. We love you, Mel. And I think that you have to realize how to succeed at work. You need to take a minute. As much as what we talked about today, you need to realize success at work is the people that you lift up. The legacy is the lift. The legacy is the lift up. Your legacy is who did you lift up? Not what did you particularly achieve, but did the thing that you achieved lift somebody else up? When people, you know, when I'm on the road and I'm in airport and people come up at the urinal next to me and have to tell me how I changed their life, that's always. I still don't know how to handle that after 17 years of this stuff. And I always, you know, I always try to be polite and not make eye contact and then. But I'll always wash my hands and I'll go out of the restroom and I'll wait for that person to come out. And when that person comes out, I'll thank them for saying that and I'll say, what made the difference. Oh, I read your book. I watched your video. I'm on your podcast. I'm in Growth day. Oh, my God. You did this for me. And I met my spouse at your thing or I did this thing and that happened and I made the money, I did this. And they tell me all the things and I always just, I always just say to them what Wayne Dyer taught me, which is like, that sounds wonderful, but you did that, you did that by listening or doing whatever. Maybe I opened the gate but you stepped through, you took the action. My legacy isn't. I didn't change your life. My legacy was, was there. I was there. I put myself out there. And there was a moment that serendipity connected all of us and opened up the gate. And by me doing my thing, my legacy is I did my thing and at some point, God, universe, crazy physics connected my thing in that person's need and opened it up. And now that person attributes to me. But really I just opened something and they went through. And the lift up happened because I was there in my calling, in my career, in what I do, in pushing myself, in everything we talked about. But the legacy is the effect that they felt now often they attribute to you, right? And in our world, we all want, I want my legacy. And I'm always like, actually, the legacy is you were there doing your thing. And the other people who interacted with it, they felt like it lifted them up in some way or another. Now, you might not have thought that that's exactly what happened, but for them, because you did your thing, you served as a role model. You were the example, you tried, you took care of them, you listened to them. They felt acknowledged and heard and more capable of going to do their thing not mimicking you. That's not legacy. They went and did their thing more confidently, more joyously. See, your legacy with your kids isn't your kids being you. Does that make sense? That's not the legacy with the children. The children being you is not the legacy. The legacy is you help them discover themselves and assert themselves and build themselves in this world. And then they go, it was mom, it was dad. They celebrate you, you know, like I celebrate my mom at all of our events. And you celebrate the people around you. And so this means you have to intentionally do two things. One, you have to do your calling your thing at the best level you can, because you have to remember someone's going to interact with that. You might not know when, how, or where. I don't know how, when, or where, why I met so many of you. But we're here, we're in Los Angeles. We're doing the work together. We're opening doors, we're building together. And I don't know what is gonna go on in your life, but I want you to know you're lifting people. You're an example for people. So the first piece is showing up, and the second place is when you do meet somebody to hold that space for them and to acknowledge and honor their own efforts. Because when you Think about, well, what is legacy? Like those moments outside the bathroom, I'll always get a note later on or a DM or something. Thank you for saying that. Because then they recognize their own strength in their interaction with you. They recognize their own strength in their interaction with you. That's what I think legacy comes down to being a child recognizing their own strength from the love of the parent or the acknowledging parent, a team member recognizing their own capabilities from the acknowledgement of the leader. But leaders, you need to take more time with the people around you to appreciate them, to hear them, to recognize their strength. And so they build in who they are around you. That's how you build a team or, or an organization. It just takes a lot more recognizing of that person. You doing your thing, so they're like, oh, this person's unique in there. But you showing up in full, doing what you're doing, and the people around you, they will see it. And when they see it and you have the conversations, you're elevating them. The legacy is in the lift up. That's our job, to lift ourselves and to lift those around us. Last idea before we break today is what's the real win? I think this is important in business, in success, what's the real win? Because I know I could have started today with a conversation like we did last time I shared with you, if you were here with us Ultra members, about the path and the path being okay, pursue and strive after those things that are your passions and your ambitions, those things you're tenacious for and you'll fight for those things that bring you that honor or that respect, that humility, that thing for you internally brings you happiness, maybe, but I know we can say that. And all people who talk about success talk about these things. So the bigger question for you is what's the win? Success at work is what? What's the real win for you? We talked about all these things and I hope they open up ideas and strategies. But what's the real win for you? How do you know when you are successful at work? How do you know this is a lifelong search for most people, they don't know. They just don't know. I'll give an example. Yesterday a friend of mine, if you're watching, sorry, but dear friend, text me and said, brennan, I'm writing a book and I'm wondering, should I get a publisher or should I self publish? Very common question for authors, right? And maybe not my answer. I said, well, tell me, how hard are you genuinely going to work to Promote the hell out of this book. Are you gonna go into warrior mode for this thing and know you gave your best or are you gonna be casual Charlie about it? Cause if you're gonna be casual about it, hey, just self publish. Don't put any obligations on yourself to a publisher if you're not gonna give your your all. Because you know, I know about people at the end, if they do something and they look back and they think they half assed it and they got the success, they actually feel even worse. Sometimes they even feel guilty. But I said, if you're going to go into warrior mode and you're going to use this as a tool to really change people's lives, then you got to work for it. You got to work for it. Now I know this person's been spinning for some years trying to figure out their next thing. And many of us are right, trying to figure out your next thing. And the problem is with trying to figure out the next thing. So often people go, oh, you know, I could do that, that sounds like a lot of work. And I don't need to do it anymore. Especially successful people, I don't need to do it, I already got the money or I'm comfortable, I don't need to do anything. So they watch all these things, the stream of life go by and the stream of life is going by and they're disconnected and they're just thinking, well, maybe one day I'll get into it. But you know, it sounds like a lot of hassle to get back into it. You know, if I get back into it, it's gonna be, it's gonna be hassle, there's gonna be pain there. And you know, I don't know. So they sit back and so I text back, I said, well, if you do this thing, there's pain. If you don't do it, there's pain. Whether you do it or you don't do it, there is pain. The difference is if you don't do it, it's just the pain of regret. It's just the pain of not doing. It's the pain of watching other people go by. It's just the pain of sitting with the fact you didn't do the thing you desired or you dreamed or you wanted or you felt called to do. If you do it, there is also guaranteed pain. But in this pain and in this effort, there is most likely also joy, competency, agency, learning, contribution, hope, magic, other people, pain alone or pain and some joy and some contribution and some success, there's pain either way. So you're gonna go in warrior mode. You really want it or you don't, but either way, just know there's gonna be some pain. That was the whole message. The real win to me after coaching all these people for this many years is that some people, they tend to go all in. Some people, they give their all, Some people, they give their best. And you know what? Sometimes when you give your best, there's pain. You give your best and they judge you. You give your best, they don't pay you as much as they used to. You give your best, they make fun of you. You give your best, you risk, ruin. You give your best, there's fear. You give your best, you don't know if you can maintain it. You give your best, you're tired, you, you give your best, you might fail. You give your best, you might burn out, there might be pain. But you know what, if you don't give your best, there is also pain. There's also pain. You don't give your best, you will never feel like you're winning if you don't fully engage. I mean fully engage life again, assert yourself again, there's no success at work if you don't fully engage and assert yourself, there's just no success. Because the worst thing is you always have the pain of knowing you're not even trying. When you have the pain of not knowing you're trying, you can be playing on the best field, getting paid the best, you can have great children, you can have a great legacy in so many ways, but you won't feel it. The real win is you feel like you engaged and gave your best. In this life, there isn't a regret. And if there is a regret, at least you know you gave your best through it. The worst regret is you half assed through it. And it makes it even a worse regret. The regret feels even worse because you didn't even try. So now you have something to regret and you didn't even try. But if you have something to regret and you know you tried, you have honor, you have self respect. I want you to have that. The real win in success is in life, in business. How do you succeed at work? You give your all again in a whole sea of people who are quiet, quitting, bowing out, complaining, waiting to see how it goes. You show up as strivers and you say, I'm here, I'm ready, I go in strength, I'm here, I'm ready, I go in strength. That's the difference maker. The real win is you know you gave your best. There might be pain, but there's pain either way. Give your best. There might be pain, but there's pain either way. Give your best. It's different. It feels different. There's self respect and honor and legacy in a different way. Give your your best. Growth day Give your best. That's the win. Define your wins and give your best. Define your wins and give your best. Define your wins and give your best.