143: Stop outsourcing your business problems: finding your own path with Daryl Seager

Welcome to a new episode of the Digital Nomads Daily podcast. We're talking all about freedom freedom lifestyle, building your freedom business, creating financial freedom, living life truly on your own terms. You are hearing guest interviews with successful freedom business owners who've been building thriving businesses their way. Plus, I will share insights from my own business journey. And now I have created my real freedom lifestyle. Enjoy this episode and if you have any specific topics you like me to cover on the podcast in the future, just reach out to me on Instagram at Digital Nomads Daily. Let's dive in. Hello, everyone. Welcome to a new episode. I'm so excited to talk about freedom today with a really, really nice guest. Actually, we have met in real life. That's the first time that we met, which I think is so cool, because a lot of the podcast guests, I actually met them on the podcast for the first time. But today we have here Dar on the podcast. Wait, where did we actually meet? It was running remote, right?

I think so, yeah. A few. A few years ago now.

Wow, Lisbon. Good old times.

Weather was nice. Yeah, it was great. Good fun.

Amazing. Amazing. So, yeah, this was actually a few years ago, and I'm really. I'm really grateful that we stayed in touch and we're following each other on LinkedIn so we can see what we're doing. I see now that you're also helping female entrepreneurs, which is so cool because I met you in person and I know, like, how. How you communicate and how you roll and how you vibe. So I really love that alignment nugget, because I can so see that.

Thank you. That means a lot.

So we're going to talk more about your business, but before we do that, let's let our audience get to know you a little bit more to understand, like, what you're doing, where you're talking from and what freedom means to you. So, okay, that's a lot of questions. Let's start with.

Yes, that is. Where would you like me to start?

Where are you talking from right now?

So now I am in Estonia, which is where I've been for the past five years. Five and a half, almost, actually.

Five and a half. Wow.

It's been a while.

That's a while. Why did you move to Estonia?

So I came here for a job, Interestingly, I applied for a job working for a tech company in London. Then they cancelled that job, but I noticed that they had another one, exactly the same role, essentially available in Estonia. And I thought, I have no idea where Estonia is. I don't know what the country is about. And I just decided, cool, let's apply for the role. And here's where I ended up.

Cool. That's such a bold move. I love it also when people are not like a digital nomad, traveling nomad, but when they moved abroad and they're just like, living their life abroad. Because also for me, that's how I started living abroad. I didn't, like, purchase the digital nomad lifestyle on Instagram. That wasn't a thing back then yet.

So it's all that abruptly before it was cool, basically.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's part of the OGs. Well, I think is I, I mean, I would never. I know people have called me that in the past, but I would never call myself a digital nomad. It's just, I, I mean, I've lived abroad, you know, I've lived in Russia, I've lived in Thailand, I've lived in France and Spain. But I've, I've moved for certain purposes. I've never really thought of myself as, oh, I'm moving for that lifestyle.

It's just for a purpose that makes sense. Makes sense. Okay, so let's talk about freedom. We will go deeper on this on the podcast, but this is a podcast all about freedom, lifestyle, freedom, business. And what I, what my goal really is now is to understand what freedom means, because there's so many different ways on how we can live our lifestyle. So if you would describe freedom to you right now in, in this moment of your. Like, what. What does that look and feel like?

Okay, starting with the most challenging question. Do you know, it's funny, I was walking to the gym this morning and I was going a little bit later because I went to bed a little bit later, so I got up a little bit later. But even that in and of itself is freedom. Because I thought, okay, I'm wandering to the gym at, you know, 9 o' clock in the morning, whereas I was seeing a lot of other people already know, working in their offices and things like this. And again, it's not about good or bad, right or wrong. It's just I realized, okay, because I have my own business, I set my own timetable, and I have that flexibility. So I guess equating freedom to flexibility, to do things when I want to do them, basically. So that's a, that's a big part of it. It's the time flexibility. And the time is what I choose it to be, or I can choose what I wish to do with my time. So the flexibility and then the choice element, I guess is two components, which I would say, yeah, a composite to that freedom aspect.

I think a lot of people resonate with that because I feel like also that's why people start their own business a lot. It's like it's this flexibility and time thing. Right. Also choosing more to do, having this option to choose to do things that light you up, that you like doing, that you're curious about, that you're interested in. And then there's this financial component of it as well, which could be happening or not, depending how well your business go.

I was going to say it's, it's not all sunshine and roses.

Yeah, we were going.

I can, you know, I can go to the gym when I want, but then. Oh, okay. Well, I don't have necessarily the same stability or security that you know, somebody who is in the job does have. So there's, there's trade offs.

Yeah, no, absolutely. Absolutely. No, I resonate with that as well because actually I woke up feeling a bit strange this morning. I was like, whoa, this is like, you know, like those feelings when this is not the day to sit your computer. And I still had to do stuff, of course, like two hours of work that I worked like that work didn't save and I didn't know that, you know, like stuff like that happened and that's. But then at the same time I was also like, yeah, I can like enjoy the sun right now and I can just go for a walk, call with my best friend and just like calm down a little bit and, and then go back to work with new energy. And that's also a lot of freedom, you know that you can really like assign yourself tasks and projects and things for business, personal life or even connecting with friends at a moment that, that works for you. So you can operate in the most aligned and best way that.

But that's, that's great awareness on your side of things. I mean there's people in or choosing a freedom lifestyle and who haven't got such a free lifestyle who aren't able to do that. So. Yeah, that's kudos to you.

Thanks. Well, hence I want to do this podcast because what I really love about like always loved about the digital nomad lady lifestyle or digital nomads lifestyle. And that's why it was like digital nomads daily was that, you know, there's so many people that do it, but then they reach different. Yeah, it's almost like different levels. Like we're playing Mario Kart, but you know, like different levels, success, but also, especially when it comes to freedom, like you got to work for it. You don't just like achieve that. It's constant maintenance. And that also goes with your business. So when it comes to your business, like, can you tell our audience, like, what is it that you're doing right now? And then also a little introduction to like, how, how did you get to that? Because sometimes people say this is my business, but then the introduction is far more interesting.

Okay, so you're expecting me to be interesting now? This is, this is not what we agreed on earlier.

I know you're interesting, that's why you're here.

So my business has shifted now recently. So I've been in coaching consulting for about 15 years now. So this is what I've been doing. And previously I was working in organizations to support their leaders through workshops and one on one coaching. And now I'm pretty much exclusively focused on one on one coaching, but focused on female leaders and female entrepreneurs to help them build their confidence, grow their success, lead teams and organizations in the way that they want to. So that's what I do now in terms of how I came to that. So a couple of years ago I was working for an organization here in Estonia and I was the internal leadership and agile coach. And it just got to the point where they weren't really listening to what I was saying. A lot of relationships had deteriorated within the organization and this new chief HR officer had come on board, which was a role that I said that the company needed. So she came on board and one of the first things she decided to do was, ah, well, you know, I see you're a contractor, I'm not going to pay you your annual bonus. And so I thought, oh, okay, well, screw you. And I. And I decided to leave. And I left with absolutely no plan of what to do. But I thought, how hard can starting a business be? And then I realized it's a little bit harder than I thought it was going to be. And then so I struggled for, you know, a year and a half or so. And then about five months ago I decided to get some business mentoring and coaching. And through that process, this is where I repositioned to focus on women because I connected with my why. And that's around the fact that I grew up with a single parent. So my father left for another woman. So my mother, after 15 years of marriage, basically had to go back to work. She had to raise two kids and go back to work and juggle all of these different things. And I didn't realize it at the time but this is why I've had more of an affinity and a connection to women. I grew up with two women, so I grew up with my mother and my sister. But I've obviously then got a strong role model of what, you know, an incredible woman is. But then, yeah, that connection and having that experience and seeing that, I didn't appreciate it at the time as a kid, I was a. But looking back, it sort of makes sense that, okay, I want to help and support and guide women as much as I can, and it feels very aligned now as well. So, yeah, that's what's led me.

Love that.

To where I am.

Cool. I think that's so important because also what you just said about like, that you struggled for one and a half years in your business to make it work. And that's so honest. And thank you for being so honest on that because that's also the thing with, like, freedom, lifestyle, freedom, business and all of these things. Like, it looks so freaking sexy online. It's like, yeah, just start a business. But then when you really go deep into it and I think this is where the freedom part comes in it. If you have this business and you want to, like, really have an impact, it has to be somehow connected to you, your why, to your mission. And all of these things, like, those things are not fluff. It's like, it's not something that you copy from your Internet Hero. It's not something that you like. This is what I talk in my programs about. Like I called Internet Hero Marketing and Internet Hero Trap because you really need to find that yourself. And that's not going to happen overnight. Like, it's going to take some time. So can you talk a bit more about that? Like how what were things in the process for you like that you did or that you tried in order to come closer to your why and really connect with that and connect your business with that.

Long journey, lots of mistakes, lots of spending money on. I think that the. The challenge is there's so much information out there and there are so many people promising certain things. And you think, oh, wow, okay, they're promising this. Yes, this is exactly what I need. Okay, cool. And. But I out. What I realized is I outsourced my problems to somebody else. I wanted, okay, say fix this for me as opposed to really understanding who I am, what I'm doing and why I'm doing it. And that takes. And nobody else can do that. Somebody can assist you with the process, but you really have to do that yourself. And again, it took me a long time to realize that because, one, I was obstinate. I thought I knew what I thought I knew. It's like, okay, this is going to be easy. It's fine. I don't need any help, I don't need any guidance. I'm just going to do it. So that's one. And I spent a lot of time just making stuff up myself. And then the second point was, once I got fed up trying to do it myself, I then wanted somebody else to do it, and that didn't work either. And it's only when I decided, okay, I need to understand what it is I'm doing, why I'm doing it, and do that slightly deep work. It's only then did things start to fall into place. But, yeah, there's. There's a lot of things out there which promote the fact that it's super easy. And I really. I dislike people intensely saying on LinkedIn, oh, yeah, I made a million. It's super easy. You just need to do X, Y and Z.

Here's my secret sauce.

It's not easy.

Yeah.

Or your circumstances and your particular connections may have made it easy, but that doesn't mean it can be replicated across other people. And I think more. I'd like to see more honesty around the fact that it's challenging and that's okay. But, you know, when it's challenging, it's worth it because then, you know, you're tested along the way. Okay. Do you still want to keep doing this? Do you still want to do this? Do you still keep wanting to do this? You know, you could go back to a job. It'd be super easy.

That would be easy. Maybe not even.

I've, I've definitely considered it many times over the past year and a half. It's like, jesus, why? Why am I doing this? Why am I doing this to myself? Life could be so much easier. Wouldn't be as fulfilling for me personally, because I know that I don't work well for other people. I work well with people, but I really struggled with, I don't know, being expected to just operate within this. Which is why I chose maybe not in the best way to leave. But, yeah, I wouldn't, I wouldn't change it. Through all the ups and downs and the struggles and hardships.

Yeah. Could you give an example of one of these sort of, like, challenges or problems that you were trying to outsource? Because I love sometimes, like, anything that you're comfortable with. Because to give our audience also a bit of a. Of A picture of how when you go to these tornadoes and to these storms and all of these things like how, what, what were things that you were out serving or like outsourcing or moving to other people.

I mean, easy as a coach, I think it's the, the question of lead generation, which, which comes up a lot. And I've spoken to other coaches about the, the same thing. And you know, this, there's organizations or companies or lead gen people, you know, I. 20 leads a week or whatever. It happens to be this, there's different promises. And I just said, okay, cool, outsourced it, got them to do some of my messaging. They did the, the Facebook ads and things like that. And I did it, I ran it. I was working with them for six months. I think we ran ads for three months and it was just, it just didn't work at all. Nothing worked. And it was not that, you know, they said, oh, you need to throw more money at it. I was thinking throwing enough money at this. And yeah, it just didn't work because I just didn't think they understood the messaging that I was trying to convey. But also I didn't at the time understand the messaging I was trying to convey. And so, yeah, that didn't, that just really, really, really didn't work.

I love that example because that's so close to my work.

Yeah, yeah, I know, but I, you know, it's, I think it's a challenging space. Everybody wants to be more visible. And I was having a conversation this morning. There's a lady, she's an entrepreneur, she sells barefoot shoes here in Estonia and I wear barefoot shoes. And we just caught up first for some tea and we were talking about this whole notion of visibility and reach. So she, she sells shoes. She sells shoes. She sells shoes to over 50 countries globally, which is incredible. I mean she's got huge number of clients across the world. But then she was saying, okay, but we seem to be stuck Instagram wise on only 3,000 followers. And she was saying, look, I don't understand what makes things work. You know, we put all this time and effort into creating or curating what we think is an awesome reel based on trends, based on data, based on what was working well and it doesn't do anything. And then we record an off the cuff video and it does really well. So I think the notion is people want to be seen, valued and trusted. What is it? Recognized? No. Trusted, liked. And there's something else. There's three criteria. You can tell me what they are. They need to know they need to trust you, they need to like you, and they need to know that you can basically solve their problem. I think those are the three core elements. Yeah, so it's how do you communicate that in a way to the right people and get in front of the right people at the right time. So this is.

Yeah, it's quite complicated. 1 like also what I can say about that because I had a conversation with, with someone that is going through this struggle right now on. Okay, but I have, like, I have to rethink my audience because this is not working. I have to rethink my offer. This is not working. And then I can run ads and then this, this, this and this and this. And actually the original conversation was because she wanted to run ads. And this is something that I sometimes do for the clients. But for me I have like this massive sort of step one, which is the funnel foundations. Like, we have to make sure that your audience strategy is like that you're so confident and so grounded in that audience strategy that there's no questions asked. And the same goes for your offer strategy and for your customer journey. And just like the mapping out this whole thing, when I shifted my business a little bit more at first I was like, I need to focus more on performance market. That's why I got into funnels and all of these things. But I hit always the same problem with those clients. They didn't have their funnel foundations in order. Like, and it's just. So now I do more like funnel foundations, which is much more fun actually, because then I work also long term with clients. So like in January, this was so cool. Like there was this client, he has his business, we digitalized everything, but he had like the funnel foundations. But we needed to tweak it a little bit to make sure it could be digitalized. Then we automated everything. And last weekend it was my birthday and he was just making, he was there on my birthday and he was just making sales on my birthday. And I was just like, yeah, because now you're running ads, it's going into a funnel and you're selling. But that is because we had this foundational layer that he needed. It's like, yeah, it's like decorating a house without the house having to be built. Like, you can't do that. Like you need the house first. So. Yeah, and that then also what you said, like, yeah, your lead generation, if you don't know your messaging, if your offer is not clear, your audience is still like, you know, in, in the making. Yeah, it's Just not going to convert. And this is that energy that you radiate also in your content. I really believe that your energy goes into your content, your lead generation. So if you're not clear, the people that are supporting you are also not going to.

Yeah, yeah.

So that, you know, act out of clarity.

Yeah. So that was, you know, last year, a lot of, A lot of learning from. Yeah, yes. Not like what you said, getting the foundations right.

Yeah. Beautiful. Is there a moment in your business when. So you had a lot of like different learnings. Right. And then there was a moment in your business where you feel like, felt like this feels good, this is working. This is like I'm, I'm moving closer to like what I see in the far future. Like, is there a moment? And if. Yes. Can you describe that for us? This is for the listeners, like not to copy this, but more like to recognize a sensation of alignment and a cessation of moving more towards freedom because something is, is working or showing signals.

I think the instance that stands out for me is when I was at a networking event and somebody asked me say what, you know, what do you do? And I said, I. And I work with ambitious leaders to help them thrive in male dominated spaces or something like that. And the guy said, oh my God, I want to introduce you to these two women. And that had never happened to me before. So just the fact that I'd been able to articulate really clearly and succinctly what I was able to do, that somebody said, okay, cool. Yes, I want to introduce you to this person. That's been one element and then the other element is, you know, women saying, oh, wow, definitely needed. I love what you do. This is cool. So I don't want to say validation. Well, I guess it is validation.

It is a validation of your car.

But it's also recognition of. It's super clear, it's super easy to understand. And I have somebody. It doesn't always have to be. I have somebody in mind, but it's just, okay, I understand what you do now. There's no confusion, there's no vagary. You know, I had literally just said one sentence and that person understood. And I think I, I had not got to that point of clarity for the previous year and a half.

Makes sense. It's such a beautiful moment of clarity because it's like when you simplify it, like when you can explain it to a kid that, that like you should be able to explain it to your old neighbor or to like someone that is like completely not in that world. And if you can achieve that, that's like a moment when you are starting to speak with clarity. And I think also with what you said before, like having so much information and on top of that we have so many tactics and secret sauces and swipe templates and copy my. This it's like, it's just like, it's so confusing for people these days to find an aligned messaging because there's literally so many options and if you, you know, you get all these options like slapped in your face like every second you're on Instagram, LinkedIn, TikTok, email, wherever it is that you're hanging out.

Yeah, this, there's, there's a lot and that's, that's the challenge. It's. How do you stand out in a very cool, crowded, crowded.

So as a, as an ambitious business owner and also as a busy business owner, what are some of the things that you're doing right now in like your business routines for like your own like, well, being in your business and that you basically put a bit blinders on for like all this noise out there. So you stay focused because shiny object syndrome is a real thing for business owners.

Yeah, I'm trying to, I'm trying to really simplify things as, as much as possible and just have, just do some real basic things. For example, for me it's connecting with people on LinkedIn, reaching out with people on LinkedIn, connecting with people who are my previous clients and just making sure that, you know that I'm in their mind. Anybody who engages with me then see if I can strike up a conversation, networking and referrals. And I'm just trying to keep it to certain activities on a daily basis. Just little, for example, you know, connect to 35 people, make 15 comments, reply to people, check on referrals and follow up on leads, that sort of stuff and just really, really, really simplify it to a daily activity. So I don't go to. And then I have to create content is what I say. I have to create content. I enjoy creating content. But then I have a content creator content creation strategy of what I want to create for the next couple of weeks and things. And I just tried to stick to that because I was trying to, you know, people telling me about YouTube, people telling me about Instagram, somebody wanted to get me on TikTok. I was thinking, no, I draw the line. I draw the line at Tick Tock. I'm too old for that shit. So yeah, I trying to stick to what I know what I Can control as much as possible. And then. Yeah, just be consistent with it.

Yeah, I think that's really great advice. Simplify. Like I always say, like, there's three things that you got to do. You need to align it with your personality. That's super important because it's like the Tick Tock thing. If you're already like a tick Tock and then you're gonna create a whole strategy and, and bank on that. Whereas you barfing your mouth already thinking about Tick Tock, it's just like, how the heck are you gonna think you're gonna make money out of that or you're gonna grow your business? It's like, it's, it's not good taste, you know?

Well, I mean, I, I have to say, it is a platform like any other. It's just, you can produce whatever content you produce anywhere else and just put it there. It doesn't have to be whatever the dancing trends or.

Yeah, I'm not on Tick Tock. I don't know what's going on there. When people say things are happening on Tick Tock, I'm like, don't even show it to me. If you can show it to me on Instagram, then I will list. But it's not. I don't hate Tick Tock, but it's just like it's another platform, it's another distraction. It's another shiny object. I'm just like that. And I don't want to hang out on social media all the time. And for work, I do that already so much. Or for connecting, like you said. Right. You're like also networking and connecting on LinkedIn that then you don't want to add all these other platforms to it. It's very overwhelming. It's not simple. It's like, it's overwhelming.

Yeah. Which is why I've decided just to focus on LinkedIn. I have a social media team. They basically take the content that I post on LinkedIn and they repurpose it or put it on Instagram because I just don't want to spend the time there.

Yeah, not as smart. I do the same, actually. I'm not so active on Instagram and I'm planning on this, preparing it right now. And I'm.

I thought that's where you, I thought that was your, your main place.

No, no, LinkedIn. LinkedIn has always been my main place. Yeah. For the podcast though, we have always been on Instagram. But for LinkedIn, it's always my personal brand. Always been on LinkedIn. And then the other thing that, that I always say that you really got to do. So we have a line. Simplify is automate. Are there like things in your business that, that you're doing terms of like applying tech or like, like using things that's been really helpful for you also to create more freedom in your business?

I think there's probably more that I could be doing. I guess everybody is going to say ChatGPT for structuring content. Calendar has been very useful. So I still write my content But I use ChatGPT to help me structure it or do we do some of the research so some of the heavy lifting. But then obviously I need to make it my own. I don't believe in just copying and pasting stuff. I do automate some of the LinkedIn outreach as well because again just in terms of time saving, it's, it's easier. And then I'll do personal follow ups later. And then I found, or I'm experimenting with there's a cool app. So there's a lot of AI comments on LinkedIn and you can see them a mile away. And I think that's just incredibly lazy.

Yeah.

Because otherwise all that's going to happen in the next few years is it's just going to be AI posts and AI comments. There's going to be nothing really at all, just bots talking to bots. But what I, what I do like about this particular app, it's called power in like share a link. What I find easy is that you can put in some search terms. So for example, for me it's women in tech. And then it pulls in into one place all of the posts on LinkedIn that have got women in tech in it. If you want to, it can give you an automated AI response. But what I do is I go in, I check the post and then I comment on it. But what I like is that it's basically pulled in all of the posts so I don't have to go searching for it. So I like that because I think.

That'S a great tip. That's so good.

Yeah. And you can do different search terms and you can follow certain creators. So basically I know you can do it via LinkedIn but I, it didn't feel, it just felt more clunky using LinkedIn. Whereas this, I like the fact that yeah, it's collated in one place.

Cool. I love that. It's also interesting how like we touched already on different things on what you can do on LinkedIn. So a lot of times people are talking so big about like Instagram and, you know, even also on Pinterest and YouTube, and I think those are really great channels as well. But, you know, like, LinkedIn is definitely such a great connector. Although I have to say, recently, I'm not so happy with the algorithm. Like, the past three months, I have had, like, connection invites where I would just constantly say, I don't know this person. I don't know this person, because they're just so random. Like, it's just so. Like, it's. It's like, I don't know a web developer from Pakistan that I don't. I don't know if that profile is even real. You know, it's like, I have no clue. So. And so I am very. Like, I try not to have too much clutter on LinkedIn, but I think it's such a great way, great place to build a personal brand and to make connections. And it was also nice because I saw you popping up on my feed and I was like, oh, my God, I want to have you on my podcast because I saw one of the posts that you helped. I think it was Gabby. Could that be maybe.

Yep.

Yeah. And I was like. Because I know her as well. I was like, oh, my God, that's so cool. What. What is he up to? And then I was like, okay, this is really nice, because then Also, if your LinkedIn profile is optimized and you have it like, you know, everything looks great, then it's such a great way to showcase what you're doing. Yeah. So we're gonna Link you your LinkedIn in the show notes so people can have a look.

I hear what you're saying about LinkedIn algorithm. I think there are just so many weird, weird and wonderful things and nobody knows. I had somebody. Friend of mine, she said she was angry with me. Why don't you comment on any of my posts? I don't see any of your posts on my feed. I'm really sorry. But, yeah, so I have no idea what shows up and what doesn't and when.

Yeah, that's also. But you can ring bells. Like, I have that now for certain people, because I also had certain people that didn't pop up anymore. And I was like, no. So then you also have to train your own algorithm. Like, keep. And your VA can actually do this as well. Like, keep visiting the profiles of the people that you want to see, because you need to tell the algorithm basically, like, I want to see this. I'm interested in this, and otherwise it will do it for you. And then. Then it goes in ways. Gets a bit lost sometimes. So, yeah, I would, I would create a, like a list of people that you want to keep seeing. And if you see that it goes a bit like out of. Out of direction, you can just like, comment and like their stuff a bit and constantly visit their profiles because then at one point the algorithm is gonna pull it back in.

Okay, this is, this is, this is good, Good knowledge as well.

All right. I wanna talk a bit more about, like, general, like, freedom business. Before we went on, before we started recording, you said that you're considering moving to London. You're, like, now five, six months in with, with this, like, positioning. What are some of, like, the, the. The freedom goals or sensations that you have for the future that you're working towards to.

Well, I think part of the freedom aspect, at least from, from my perspective, is not running from my past anymore. So I've obviously, being a coach, I've done a lot of coaching and therapy or have taken coaching and therapy. But what I realized, I was in the UK last, last week for some work. I spent time with. With family and stayed at my sister's for a change, which was the first time in years. But it was really nice just to chill and hang out. I was doing some work for one of her clients and I said to her, I said, I'm looking forward. I'm planning on coming back to the uk. And she looked at me and said, yeah, but you've written that every year in your. Your Christmas card for the past, past 10 years or whatever. I thought, okay, fair play. You've called me out on it. But this time when I went back, I really felt that I wasn't running away because although I said my mother was a. Was a great model, she was also very controlling. And so I spent a lot of my 20s and 30s wanting to get away because I felt a sense of being oppressed or controlled when I was back in the uk. But I did. I didn't have that. So when we talk about freedom, I really felt a sense of freedom when I went back to the uk. It's like, oh, okay. It's actually quite nice to be back. I didn't feel constrained or constricted or judged in any way. And so a move back would just be with the sense of freedom as opposed to feeling like I should or I need to. So it's a choice to go back and spend time with family. My mother's getting a little bit older, spend time with my nephew, spend time with my sister, spend time with friends. So freedom in terms of that aspect is just freedom from the past for.

Me, I think beautiful love now. And what is sort of trajectory in your business right now? Like, what are some of these, these big dreams that you're working on?

Big, big dream is. Did I. Did you know about the Little Things when we met? No, maybe not. I didn't mention it to you.

I mean, I was going through a breakup, so spare me if I. Oh, no, no.

I mean, I remember. I remember that. I don't know. I don't think I'd had anything made by then. I can't remember. Anyway, so big, big dream is obviously scale my coaching business. I really want to be able to grow and scale that and move that beyond me, potentially other people in the business. But then the idea was always to use that to fund another business, which is called the Little Things, which is all about relationships, understanding each other's love languages and being able to communicate more effectively and openly around it and have better depth and quality of relationships as a result of this. Because a lot of the time we don't talk about these things enough in relationships. Interestingly, conversations with a venture studio who are interested in it. So this is super exciting from, from my perspective. But yeah, that's the big vision is to build an app for businesses as well as for couples that they're going to change the way that we communicate and really help people have better quality relationships both inside and outside work.

Wow, that is a big thing. I love it.

Yeah, so that'd be cool. And if I could, yeah, if I could reduce the global divorce rate. I think I said something stupid like if I could reduce the divorce rate by 10%, this would be awesome because I. I think in a lot of cases, not all cases, obviously, people don't get divorced because they, you know, don't love it and anymore. Well, it does happen because of that. But they've stopped creating the environment for love to exist because they've stopped doing things for each other to create that environment of love. And so hopefully if they use my app, this won't be a problem or it will help to mitigate those sort of circumstances. And in the workplace, if you understand your people better, their needs and how to connect with them, then work environments become far more pleasurable places to be.

100%, actually, I love that because I think in general, I mean, it talks also a lot about like your alignment and your freedom and. And also like, it's kind of like the maintenance that a lot of people just stop doing in a way. I don't know if we're getting too distracted if, because there are so many options. We're just sort of like playing it safe and always like pick outside. But this is definitely, I think, also in friendships, but relationships work wise, like, you know, it. I, I've seen this also in my business that people are like, oh, yeah, I found this other person who can do it too. I won't work with you anymore. And I'm like, okay, like, that's interesting. Like we have spent a significant time together and because there's like a moment of, I don't know, things are not working or whatever that is not like pushing through. And I think also, like, I mean, yes, in, in love relationships, but even in your business, like, it's not going to be always easy. It's not going to be beautiful. It's going to be, it's going to be draining and exhausting and ugly and painful and you're going to have some scars and marks on the way. But that's, that's just life. It's just part of it. And I feel like we live in this sort of. Not we, but a lot of people because of social media and whatever. Like, we live in this illusion that if, if it's not like, like bright and shiny and big, it's not sexy and cool anymore, so we move on. What is that? Like, we give up so easily.

Yeah, I mean, I think that it's easier to keep things on a surface level. It's much harder to be vulnerable and open because there's huge risk involved. Yeah, but you know, if you're. Yeah, and this is fine. You can keep it at the surface level the whole time and there's nothing wrong with that. That's, that's a choice. But the real value and depth and meaning comes from going under all those layers, peeling back all those uncomfortable things, having those uncomfortable discussions and then you get to real really, really great and cool stuff. At least that's what, that's what I think. I mean, the data show that as well, but it depends on whether people are willing to do it or not. But I'm hoping that giving people a bit of a tool to have those sorts of conversations will help.

Yeah, no, I believe in that. I also like, like, just to reflect on it personally as well. And I mean, this is also something the listeners know that I'm, I'm very like, you know, open book, as in, I mean, I won't share every detail, but I'm not afraid to be vulnerable. Like when we met Daryl, there was this Breakup that I went through. And it was like a lot of like, like crazy things that were happening in this moment. But also I was like, it was in a way so surface level relationship, there was no depth. And when I met my now partner fiance, it's still so weird that I'm a fiance, but okay. But when we met, we went so deep right away and there was so much uncomfortable conversation. Like it was. And also because we were actually exploring openness in this first year of the relationship. And a lot of people were like, why would you do that? And this and that. Especially because my ex completely it up there. Like, you know, But I was like, I think that, that there is something to learn here. And I was not like per se planning on marrying this person, but I was just like, there must be a golden nugget to learn here. Like, there is a reason why this person comes into my life and whatever I can learn, I will take it. And actually what I realized is that at the time, the openness of the relationship really questioned. What do you communicate? How do you communicate? And it was like, it made me feel so insecure but social, so confident at the same time and so vulnerable and so much ego and everything. It was like. But it was. It was so deep and all these conversations and now there is no openness in our relationship anymore. But because we together closed it. But also like we. I feel so safe with this person. I feel like he has seen me more naked than my body can show nakedness. You know what I mean? Like, it's like straight to my soul and for me to him as well. So, yeah, now I'm engaged and I feel really good about that. But I had never considered marrying anyone in my life before. Never dreamt of it. This was not my dream. But I trust because we went through this insane depthness that a lot of relationships you just don't reach. That.

That's super cool. That's really beautiful. Tear. I think that it just reminds me of the phrase or the saying. It's. It's very easy to be physically naked, but much harder to be emotionally naked with. With something.

I like that. Yeah. Beautiful. Beautiful. Wow. I feel like we can go on for a long time, but probably, yeah, we have to also be mindful of our listeners. But is there anything about. About your freedom journey so far? Living abroad, meeting so many amazing people, including myself, of course.

Of course.

All over the world.

I mean, listen, that was. That was a highlight, you know, spending time with you and Michelle in that apartment. It was cool.

Yeah. So grateful. For that. But is there anything of that whole journey so far that you learned and that you're, that you would like to share with our audience?

I think if I, if I reflect back, I knew that I wanted to do something myself. And again, this doesn't necessarily apply to everybody. Everybody. This is not about, you know, having to go and be an entrepreneur or anything like that. But I knew this very early on. I mean, 20, probably 20 years ago, I wanted to do something. And then, well, meaning friends were saying, oh, are you sure? You need to think about this. You need to be careful, which is great. And you know, I love them and they meant well, but if you want to go and do something, just go and do it. Because it took me, yeah, 20 years to then get back into that space where I wasn't even ready. You know, I did it without a plan. As I said, I left a job with no, are we ever ready? I don't know what I'm doing. And then, you know, you really, you know, you realize a lot of things along the way, but if you want to do something, go and do it. Because this, hopefully most people have some sort of safety net. You know, you've got friends, you've got family. There's always another option. But yeah, just don't, don't delay, step out and take a risk to do.

What you want to do, even if it's small steps. Like, you don't have to like move cross globe, quit your job, like do something radical. You can start right now with something really smart. You can start networking. You can start, you know, like doing research like you said, using chat GPT for research is really great. Like you can start already.

But yeah, just don't. I mean, other people do have your best interests in mind, but it's technically their best interest in their fears. So yeah, just do what you want to do.

Love it. All right, cool. We always close the episode or end the episode with one question from you to me. So do you have a question? I didn't.

Oh, wow. I didn't know that. Okay, now I'm going to come up with a question on the spot. Okay. Okay. What is, what is one thing that you want to leave from your previous life to take in? So if you're unmarried life, one thing you want to leave and one thing you want to take into your married life. Okay, I can see back at you.

So I do think, hope that, that married life is going to be with kids. So what I would like to with add to my new married life.

What do you Want to leave behind and then what do you want to bring into? So for example, leave behind. When I've had discussions with people like this before, it's, you know, I want to leave behind an element of ego because, you know, if I want to have kids, then that's something, you know, I want to take into. Want to leave behind an element of that as an example.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah, no, gotcha. Okay. So what. What I. Yeah. Considering kids, what I would like to leave behind is this insane, ridiculous, I need to survive hustle mentality. I need to. Need to be productive every minute, every second. I need to have more tools to make me more productive. Productive. I cannot breathe because I need to be so productive energy. And I'm working on that right now to like calm down. That's really difficult.

You definitely, you definitely seem much calmer.

I think I am, but it's really like struggle still because I was so used to that. And it's also in the Nomad space, but also I used to work at a business operational efficiency company, so everything was hyper efficient and you know, it was like, it was a bit like this sort of like micromanaged kind of style of efficiency of yourself. So I would like to be a bit more. So what I want to bring is this child feeling of like, be more playful and like I smile a lot but often also because I make like, it's so difficult smile. You know what I mean? I just want to genuinely smile because it's playful and just like, like, like be, be less sort of tense in that way. Does that make sense? Yes, I think it does. Does that also answer the full question? Yeah, I left something.

Leave the, the hustle and the sort of the, the crazy productivity mindset behind and just be more present and playful.

Yeah. And I think as an entrepreneur like or as a business owner, this is going to be my biggest challenge for coming years. Like I'm, I feel like I'm good at being a wifey. Like I really love that. I love taking care of my partner, he loves taking care of me. But it's like this. So just feels actually a lot of freedom right now. But like then thinking about the rest of my life and how entrepreneurship and business owner ownership and all of that is that narrative, how that is changing in my mind, in my body is like, woah, this is really different. So new freedom goals. I'm not sure how I'm going to figure it out yet, but it will come to me.

You'll figure it out along the way.

Yeah, I believe that. Yeah.

Cool.

I like that question. That's such a great question. Thanks for asking that question.

Thank you for putting me on the spot and asking me to ask a question.

Amazing. So let's share where people can find you best and you can also name your website. That would be really great. Especially if we have women in tech listening here or women leaders in tech.

Yeah, women in tech. Women in male dominated spaces. My website, there's not a huge amount there, to be honest. It's just darylseeker.com but the best place to find me is probably LinkedIn.

Okay, beautiful.

I'm hanging out.

We're gonna add it to the show notes. So if you go to digitalnomistaily.com podcast and you can find this episode, then you can find everything. You can also go to my LinkedIn because I'm connected with Daryl, so you will see him there. Thank you so much for listening. If you have any specific questions, let us know. Daryl, thank you so much for coming. I really enjoy.

Thank you for inviting me. It was lovely to see you catch up and hear all of your fabulous news.

Yeah. And I wish you really all the best with your business. I think it's really awesome that you're doing, so keep it going.

Yes, ma'. Am.

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