Day 14 - So Long, From Paris: Lessons Learned from the 2024 Games | The Game Inside The Games

The final day in Paris. We say farewell to the Games and take a look back at some of our favorite moments. Welcome back or welcome to the Game Inside the Games on finding mastery. I'm Dr. Michael Gervais, by trade and training, a high performance psychologist.

And I'm Nastya Lukin, Olympic gold medalist. And we are here in Paris. And in this special series, we unlock the psychology of pivotal, often unseen moments that can make or break in an athlete's dream. What's it like to focus a lifetime of experience into one performance, a single moment?

What goes on inside the minds of the brightest stars while the whole world is watching? Welcome back to Paris. And let's dive into the game Inside the Games.

Welcome back to Paris and the Game Inside the Games presented by Microsoft Copilot.

Our love of the underdog is embedded in our cultural psyche and reflected in some of our most compelling stories. From Jean Valjean in Victor Hugo's novel of Les Mis, to the real life Aaron Brockovich, to the American hockey team's Miracle on Ice, we find ourselves rooting for those with the odds stacked against them. We draw personal inspiration from these stories which celebrate that when you put in the work, when you invest in your inner life and your craft, anything is possible.

So in this final episode of the Game Inside the Games, we want to touch on some of those stories that have touched us in Paris. Stories that highlight the humanity of the competitors and show us that we have so much more inside of us if we're actually willing to go there. And speaking of willing to go there, Simone Biles, she absolutely went there this Olympics. If those that remember in Tokyo had the twisties and really actually put her mental health first. And I think for the first time ever in Olympic history that I can recall, she basically told the world, it's okay to not be okay, but it's most important to take care of your mental health first. And I really feel like she opened the door to so many conversations that have happened, not even just here at the Olympics, but worldwide.

What I love that she did is that she came back, she had to put in some real work to work through this. And she's also said, look, I'm not. I am not a solution for mental health. I'm just trying to figure it out. She has a quote in her documentary that she's. She's just wanting to be human so desperately just wanting to be a human that her honesty and commitment to really trying to investing in herself, to being vulnerable, to letting it rip, it's really inspiring.

It is And I think to your point of being human, I think so often, you know, we put these Olympic athletes on a pedestal and we forget that they are human. And I think that's what she did. And for her to be able to come back and by the way, not just come back, but win again. And you know, she just showed the entire world once again that she is the very best in the world.

It's incredible. And then there's the Turkish shooter and what he ended up doing. He goes to the world's biggest competitive stage and he doesn't have any of this sophistication of technology. Basically puts one hand in the pocket, grabs his gun in the other hand and kind of squints his eye and just shoots and ends up winning a silver medal. Where whereas his competitors have all this technology in their lenses and their goggles and the whole thing and like to have that raw talent to. This is a great example, to have raw talent and to match it with investing in your skill, both psychological and technical like that. There's no magic bullet here, but that is part of the recipe and maybe.

Not even part of it, but just all you need, you know, I think the simplicity of it. So, so often in today's day and age, there's just so many other things that we all think that we might need this and this and that to win and. And he just showed by. To win an Olympic medal, you don't need all of that, you just need yourself.

I love that.

And of course Sunisa Lee, who was the reigning Olympic all around champion in gymnastics, came back to this Olympics. She was actually told that she might not ever do gymnastics again after she won gold in Tokyo. She had two very rare kidney diseases and she said that really put a lot of fear in her thinking somebody was going to take this away from her and not be able to do something that she loved. And not only was she able to squash all of that, she came back out here, won a bronze in the all around, she won a bronze on the uneven bars and of course the gold medal with the team. So I am just so, so, so happy for her.

One of my other really inspired moments was Noah Lyles where after he won the men's 100 meter dash, he sent out a tweet, basically. And I want to read it because it's just like he really speaks to the humanness of being one's best and potentially being the best in the world. And so he says, I have asthma, allergies, dyslexia, add, anxiety and depression. But I will tell you that what you have does not define what you can become. Why not you? And I love that. It gives me chills thinking about it because it's so honest. Like we all have something. Life is so personal. It is so intrinsically and intricately delicate that figuring out how to be honest and true to yourself and to really go forward in life, that's what the games for me inspire. And so he said it beautifully. And you know, I mean, he's flying to win a gold medal in the 100 meter dash. Flying. And he's really got some insights here.

Yeah, absolutely. And somebody else that has flown in the pool, perhaps Katie Lynch. Decky became the most decorated American female athlete, winning her ninth gold medal and 14th overall medal. I mean, absolutely incredible. I don't know any other words to describe what she has done here in the pool and continues to do every Olympics that she's performing in.

And then there's Stephen Nederasic. And I mean, what. He has just captured the attention of the importance of mental imagery. He won a bronze in pommel horse for the US And I've loved this part. Like he is showing the world that mental imagery is part of being your very best.

Oh, it really is. And, and you know, they started off with such a high. The U.S. men won the bronze medal in the team competition as well. And it was the first time in 16 years that they had been on that podium and they've been chasing that games after games. So that was already a success. And then he goes on and has individual success in the pommel horse finals. It was actually so close to those top three on the pod and it was an incredible finish for him.

Yeah, it's like for the last, I don't know, 20 some years that I've been doing this. I just love when an athlete and the world points to the importance of the mental part of the game. Because we see the physical. It's so tangible. It's. And it's so inspiring and it's so beautiful and strong and everything that's inspiring us. But when you understand what's happening before and the training that goes into it and that training is, that is available to all of us. Psychological skills training and mental skills training is available to everybody. Whereas I can't do what he does on the pommel horse. Not even close. But I can say, oh, look how the best in the world train their mind. This is one of many ways that we can train our mind, but I can do that and say, oh, how do I fold that into my life or for my son's life or my children's life. And so I'm super inspired by that.

It's the relatability, right? We can all sit at home and watch a sport on TV and think, like you just mentioned, well, I'm never gonna be able to do that on the balance beam or the palm horse or in the pool. But it's the relatability of, okay, maybe it's not going to be competing at the Olympic Games, but I'm also going through something in my life where it's, it's daunting or scary or challenging. And so how do I use, you know, the mental, like my mental strength to get through that? And I think not even before, but even during, you know, Simone Biles posted during the Games how a picture just with her eyes closed and whether she was meditating, visualizing just being in that moment and talking about how important mental health really is.

And what we're witnessing is some of the most electric, the most intense, kinetic. There's just such a stress that happens for people in this environment, which is. Is really inspiring that we're watching some show us how to work well with stress. Stress is part of our life, especially if you want a great life. And so they're giving the, you know, success has clues. These are some of the clues. Invest in your inner life and then you too can have a great life.

Yeah, absolutely. And speaking of having a great life, the Cinkovich brothers who won the gold in rowing, it was just absolutely incredible being able to just have them here, first of all. But they have won three Olympic gold medals, one silver. And beyond the medals, what I love the most, and I've never really heard an Olympic athlete say that their goal is, was just to have a happy.

Life, or we are doing in life, we are, we are trying to have a good life and to be happy. I like, in the end, we are going to work to have more money and to be happy. So you need to have a good goal. Why are you trying to be the best? To be happy. And if you are trying to be best just to be the best, it's not for me, it's not a good reason.

I like that. Trying to be the best. To be happy.

To be happy. Yeah.

For me, that's my life philosophy. Everything I do in life, I'm doing it to have a good life and to be happy in the end.

Yeah. So they're working in sport, training to be their very best. They were so clear about that in our conversation. To have happiness and joy, be part of their life. It was so refreshing because, you know, this equation can go dramatically wrong where you invest in everything. You're find the podium and you see tears of that athlete. But behind the tears are not tears of relief or joy or celebration. It's tears that I'm. I thought this was going to change me. I'm still miserable. That's not that uncommon. And for them to just have that buoyancy and the fire in their belly, it was so much fun.

They were just the energy, you know, and that's kind of what they said, making sure that you're doing your best, you know, And I think so often the conversations that we've even had here over the course, is it, are you doing. Trying to do your best or are you trying to beat somebody else? You know, and that they quite frankly said never. You know, they really did say, we are trying to do our best. We would rather do our best and finish fourth than be second and know it wasn't our best.

Yeah. Again, success leaves clues. This is a big one. I think that for some people, I would say almost uninformed, they are trying to be the best. And I don't want to put too much on this because there's so many different ways that you can go at life, and it's not for us to judge what's the right way. But over and over again in our conversations over my 20 some years and years as well, it's so clear the controllables are the thing to try to master. So I. I'm making micro choices moment to moment. And so are these great athletes to try to be one's very best.

Yep.

Controlling the controllables.

And Summer Sanders, like, that conversation that we had on the game inside the Games was so fun. Like, she's a legend in swimming.

Absolutely.

Like you. And you guys have a. Yeah.

I've known her for, for. I can't even remember the first time I met her. But, you know, it's. It's such a cool bonding moment when you meet another Olympian and you really, like, click, and then you have this. It's. You become part of a family, and it's that it was really, really clear. I thought that, you know, she was just so excited to even talk to you. She kept telling me, when can, you know, she wanted to come on and speak to you. And I think you kind of opened her eyes to a pivotal moment that she didn't even realize that she had in her career. When a coach basically tapped her on the shoulder right before she won the gold medal.

But she said you could see the eyes.

Yeah. Everything kind of paused in that moment when she was here. And she kind of said that he told her that he didn't think that she was taking it seriously. And that was when it really hit for her. And then she got out of the.

Pool and I know where you're going. Because both of us afterwards, when we talked about what she did, it's so special because no one taught her or trained her how to do this. But she got out of the pool. She was pissed off. She was angry. When she jumped into the pool, she's like, I can't swim my best like this. So she got out and she asked herself three questions.

So I found a room, bathroom by myself and a mirror. And I asked myself three questions in the mirror. I knew nothing of psychology. I just knew I needed to talk to myself. My dad calls it to come to Jesus. And that's what I had. And I said, why do you do it? And then I answered to myself, I do this because I love it. I said, what are you doing it for? Or who are you doing it for? And the answer was selfish and simple. I do it for myself. And then who loves you? And that was the foundation. That was like, nothing's going to change. And maybe going back to your answer, social media, and how I would have done with that if I'd always answered with, who loves me? Who really loves me? Who's going to really be there and go out with me afterwards if I get eighth place out there. Right. And that was five people. And they were in the stands. It was my mom, my dad, my aunt, my brother, and my best girlfriend. And then I went out and swam the most imperfect race and somehow won. But I was happy. I was happy. Yeah.

And it felt like, as she was describing it to us, it just settled her down. She got very clear. She felt part of a larger support system. I loved all of that. And it's again, I've said this twice now. Success leaves clues. And this is another one. Like doing the internal work. I could paint another picture. Both of us could. That she jumps in the pool, pissed off, gets up, back on the blocks, frustrated. We could go one of two ways. She channels it and.

Right. Like Lindsey Vaughn kind of shared that she would do that. Right. She had to be a little bit angry when she was at the top of the mountain and. And very different for Summer. She had to get out.

That's right. And that was a fun conversation with Lindsay Vaughn where she was like, No, I use all of that intensity and anger and chip on her shoulder to put it on the edge. And in swimming, there's a thing called easy speed, where they're flying across the pool, but they're not trying as hard as you and I would imagine they are. Of course, it's 100% effort, but there's an ease to it. There's a letting go to it, there's an allowing the stroke to take place, to be maximally efficient. And so she knew that she couldn't find easy speed with. With anger. It was a great insight.

And it's also so knowing yourself. That's right, you know, and I think that is what was really, really interesting and important to note, that she maybe had never been in that situation before. But knowing yourself, being aware of maybe yourself in other situations, not. You can't replicate the Olympic Games. You can never truly quite prepare for that moment specifically. But she knew herself well enough that she needed to get out of the pool, go to a mirror, look at herself, and ask her those three questions.

And this Games is the first Games I've seen a mindfulness room. And the whole purpose of mindfulness, some people might think it's to relax. That's not the purpose of mindfulness. The purpose of mindfulness, one of the core tenants, is to become more aware. And so they've got an entire space. It's beautiful. They did a really nice job. There's three or four different sections, and in those sections there's assisted meditation and mindfulness training. There's some technology to help people be guided. There's a place to write letters, postcards to your loved ones. There's a Zen kind of place to do some drawing and some ink work. And like, they really are thoughtful about. For the first time ever, the inner life is matter matters. We're going to create a space for you. And I think that that's a celebration, too.

It absolutely is. And I can only imagine with that being the first Games that this has happened, what it's going to look like for. In many years to come and every Olympics, hopefully, moving forward. Speaking of, you know, mindfulness, Katie Hoff, swimmer, we had a great conversation with her, and what struck me was this was her first Olympics that she's ever been to since she competed in 2008. And that in itself was kind of eye opening for me because I've pretty much been to everyone since 2008.

For me, I went to the opening ceremonies for the first time. Obviously, when I was competing, I was swimming the next day So I didn't attend. You've talked about this, but it was the first time that I actually realized that the being an Olympian is cool.

Wait, like, as in a few days ago? Like, yes, a few days ago. Yes.

Like, I. And I obviously always knew it was, like, an amazing accomplishment, but, like, being on the other side of it and sitting there and actually being able to see how the rest of the world and how people viewed an Olympian. I had this moment at the Opening Ceremony where I was like, wow. Like, this is really cool. There's definitely been some healing. I mean, there's a reason it's been 16 years since I've been back to my first Olympic Games.

So that's intentional.

That's an. Oh, yeah. That was, like, fully intentional. So, like, I've done a ton of work to get to that.

So you almost blocked out maybe the thought of the Olympics being even cool, like, any positive feeling about it intentionally, until 16 years later now, because you say it, you went to the opening ceremony, and for the first time, you realize, like, this is cool. Like, did you intentionally maybe block that feeling of allowing yourself to feel it was cool because of the pain or the trauma that you had felt?

I think a lot of it is. I always viewed it like, I have to be a gold medalist, or it's not an accomplishment. Or it's not an accomplishment I feel good about. And so I think that was my awakening of sitting there. Like, no, like, just being an Olympian is a really cool and incredible feat. And up until that point when people would say that and, like, you know. You know that you're like, oh, you're an Olympian.

Like, oh, my God.

And I would always kind of be like, thanks. You know, and then dreading the next question of, right.

Did you win?

Did you.

What did you medal? Yeah.

So I think that's a piece of it. Yeah.

It sounds crazy, but it took you 16 years to heal from being an Olympian. Yeah.

Yeah.

And it almost broke my heart a little bit. For 16 years, she didn't feel like it was cool to be an Olympian because she had that disappointment. And by disappointment, she still won medals at the Olympics, but it was not the Olympics that she had hope for that people had wanted for her.

Yeah. I mean, that was a moment where it was so honest and it was so delicate, and you could see her flooding with emotion. And that's just what I love about where we've been over the last handful of weeks is that there's an intensity and electric, you know, nature here, but there's Also, it's some of the most athletic people on the planet. You know, and part of going into the games means you understand vulnerability. You understand what it means to get to your edge at practice in front of your peers, sometimes in front of your coach, and to come up short over and over again when you. When you don't know how to figure it out. And you've got, hopefully, a coach and somebody, and you've got to work within yourself. What she did on air with us was like a testament to her courage. I love that. And. And I get to see you cry as well.

Gosh. I know. It was. Wasn't expecting that. That wasn't on my. Bingo.

Yeah. And that was a different conversation. It wasn't with. With Katie, but, you know, it was the idea that some athletes have gone through some really incredible dark times, and we don't get through this world without trauma.

Yeah.

And for an athlete who won a bronze medal, a lev kelter in rugby, women's rugby, to bring forward a really deep, dark, traumatic moment for her that touched both of us. That was incredible.

I remember snowboarding in Alaska, and so I'm on this mountain, and I remember wanting to snowboard it with abandon. Like, just hit every jump. It's fresh powder. And I tried this backflip, and I was alone. And it's not. I don't usually snowboard alone, but I had to, like, recoup in Alaska and do this on my own. And I remember not landing that backflip and being face first in the snow and being like, I can just stay here was pretty. And I could. And nobody in my mind, what was telling me was that nobody would care, nobody would notice. And. And I. And I had this epiphany at this moment, like, I'm a twin. And I was like, Daria would have landed that backflip. She would have been down the. You know, back at the lodge, up the gondola, and, you know, and. And that I had a sense of, I can't leave her. I can't. I need. I have a responsibility to be her twin and to not leave her. And that kick started into this moment of. This kickstarted into this moment of she always says, you know, to someone, you know, you're twin, like, who. Who's older, and she's older. Of course, I'd always feel less than in that conversation. And so I realized that moment, I'm no less of a human because I came out second. And I'm no less of a human because that no happened. That I didn't make that Olympic team. And so, yeah, I got up slightly cold and went down to the lodge, and the rest was history.

It really did. And I think it really goes back to, hopefully these stories can inspire everybody at home. Because, sure, these Olympic medalists, Olympians, they are superheroes, right? They're incredibly. Just so many different words for them. But at the end of the day, we're all humans, and at the end of the day, we all face the obstacles that we all face together. And it's not about how do you win, but it's about more. More. So how do you pick yourself up when you're on your face, literally or figuratively, how do you pick yourself up? How do you keep going? And I think these are the stories that will truly, hopefully inspire the entire world.

And one more point to that, to the entire world piece is that I want to encourage people. If you love the humanity of going for it, if you love sport as well, try to find your way to a game. Louisiana 28 is next. And one of the things that you'll feel is that there is a. Not only a humanity, but there's a collection where there's an. There's a beautiful tolerance and acceptance and interest, and just about every flag is waving. And last night in one of the Games, I saw a flag that wasn't even part of the sport. They came with, not having an athlete that was representing their country, and they still brought their flag, like, we're here, too.

And it's like unity. You know, it's. The whole world is united. And I think that is what one of my favorite parts of the Olympics in general is. No matter what your political beliefs, religious beliefs, no matter what's going on in the world, the entire world unites for. For these few weeks, and everybody is cheering for the same thing. Everybody is cheering for, you know, success, or not even success. Everyone's just cheering for the athletes and cheering for them being together. And I think that is so special. And also, to your point, you can't feel that through a screen 100%.

Like, I'm sure you would back me on this, that find your way to the Games if you can. And it is something that is magical. It's special. You feel part of something really big and wonderful, and in particular, Paris, just stunning. Like, every corner that you. You turn, it's like, oh, my God, this is beautiful. And then you turn and this is beautiful. It's infinitely beautiful here.

I mean, this is my seventh Olympics, I believe. And, you know, I haven't really been Able to go to too many other events, sports in the past. And last night for the first time, I got to go to beach volleyball. And as you know, you've been there. It is just stunning, the Eiffel Tower, like just the way that they put this together. And it was this moment that was probably top three of my entire Olympic moments out of all seven games.

No way.

Nothing even happened yet. The match hadn't started. But the lights kind of went. Not the lights went down cause it was outside, but basically it was just dark. It was 10 o'. Clock. The music kind of started. Nobody was on the court. And the Eiffel Tower just started spinning, sparkling.

But wait, the music, you're right, they turn down the stadium lights and then turn on this beautifully lit up Eiffel Tower. But the music is this culturally beautiful song, right?

It was stunning. I was with a friend and, and co worker and. And she started crying.

Oh, she did.

And it was her first Olympic sport that in venue that she had ever been to. And I was like, that is what the Olympics are about. It's. You feel it. You know, even watching any tv, watching a video on social a picture it. You don't get that feeling. And seeing tears in her made me emotional because that's what the Olympics is about. It's a feeling.

Yeah. That's awesome. And Paris did it. Well, they did it. They did it right. This is, I've been, this is my fourth Olympic games and by far I'm marking that. This is one of very special and nasi, you and I had not done this before and so this was a real treat for me. I want to say thank you for all of your insight, for your vulnerability, for the way that you articulate what it's like to actually win the process of becoming the person who is playing championship sport, like at the highest level in gymnastics, this has been a real treat. So I just want to say thank you for this.

Likewise. And I think like we've talked about so many times, the, the understanding and kind of more learning more about the why and you know, the how of how maybe I did. All of that has been eye opening for me and then just being able to hear from, you know, fellow Olympians and share more stories that, you know, people at home aren't able to watch on the television screen. So. And we wouldn't have been able to do this without so many people. We want to take a final minute to thank our partners. Today's AI insights are brought to you by lti, Mindtree and Microsoft. LTI Mindtree gets you to the future faster with Copilot for Microsoft 365.

In the spirit of highlights, just a reminder that we're going to use Copilot to summarize the top moments, the key takeaways, and the actionable insights from the game Inside the games that you can apply in your own life. If you want to check those out, make sure you subscribe to our newsletter@findingmastery.com Newsletter I really hope that we were able to bring something unique to the viewers experience. And in that uniqueness is your insights, your understanding, my understanding of how the psychology of it works and putting names to it. You lived it. And so my hope is that you're able to find one thing, one thing in these conversations and begin to practice it and to incorporate that in your life. Whatever one of the practices that we've come across that you go, I could do that and take your time and just chip away at it one at a time. Chip away. Whatever these psychological practices, whether breathing or mindfulness or the three questions to know yourself better, this is something that I'm really inspired by and I'm hopeful for.

I am as well. Thank you all for joining us here in Paris. So long from here and maybe one day we'll see you again on the Games Inside the Games.