Bad Day, Good Life: Rediscover Joy in the Everyday

Most people spend their entire life stressed without ever giving a single thought as to what it is they really want or what's important to them. See, I'm here to cut through all that noise, connecting you to yourself and the life that you were meant to live. I used to slave away at a corporate job that I hated, but I broke through the social norms and pursued my passion. As a result, I own my own coffee company, I'm espresso sommelier, and I get to travel the world. You, too, can live a life that you love, but it starts with getting clear about what you want. It starts with a new decision. I'm your host, Donnie Rouse, and you are listening to the podcast One Life. What's going on, guys? Good morning today, and how are you feeling? The answer to that question sometimes could be a little bit. A little bit maybe triggering, because especially if you are in a hard spot in your life. But hopefully the intention of this podcast today is to give you a little bit more perspective on life, to help you see the bigger picture rather than zooming on this one little area of your life that may not be going the way you think it should go. So to give you a little bit of backstory, this time of year, I'm usually so kind of, like, caught up in doing production and deliveries and markets that I tend to get worn down pretty easily. So as the season, the summer season progresses, it kind of stacks until there's a point where I feel like there's a breaking point. Granted, I try to, you know, take these breaks, go see sunsets and watch sunrise, which I haven't done many this year, and hit the gym. But even with that, it's not enough to kind of offset the emotional, like, heaviness of feeling like there's not enough time or that there's too many things going on for me to control. So the real problem here is really my focus was just too focused on all of the immediate things that needed my attention, that I wasn't putting the right planning into my day, and. And I wasn't giving myself the credit for and panning out to see just exactly how much stuff I have to be grateful for. So the story takes place. I had just finished a market, and I was just feeling really, really stressed in the sense that, like, my body was just. If you looked at me, you can tell that I was feeling it. Just the stress from doing the production, like, you know, the carrying, all the physical labor of it. And so I came home from doing one of the markets, and I said, you know what? I'm just gonna take a nap. So I slept for half an hour, woke up, I felt completely different than I did, you know, the 30 minutes previously. And I said, well what am I gonna do now? It's actually still early. Normally like I'm, I'm cleaning, I'm getting everything ready for the following day but I got some time right now I'm not gonna worry about doing the other stuff. Let me do something for me. So it was around, probably around like 6:30, 7:00'. Clock. I say I am going to go watch the sunset. That to me sounds amazing. So I was going towards the place I normally go to. I normally go to Cove island park and watch it sling a hammock and then watch the sunset as I'm eating my dinner. This time I had this aspiration to go to the top of the mall parking lot. It's one of the higher buildings I guess that you have access to in the downtown Stanford. So I took my dinner and last minute decision, I turned towards the mall. Going up the mall parking lot, you know, I kind of, there's this nice spiral thing that brings you all the way up to the top and I was trying to drive to the roof. A security guard right next to, right next to the ramp that went up and knowing that I'm not supposed to be there I just kind of like pretended like I was looking around and they just kind of went up and then jumped the, jumped the chain fence and then now I'm on top of the roof. So I'm sitting on the roof and there was this, you know, there's a light pole there with that giant concrete base and it's positioned away so it's almost like in a diamond shape. I guess depending how you look at it, it's always a diamond shape. Right. But where the sunset was, it was almost like the square was pointing in that direction. Right. So it's not really comfortable to sit on. And so I was like, all right, well let me, let me sit somewhere else. So I sat on this platform and I watched it and everything was still. The only thing up there was me and the seagulls and lots of seagull poop that was literally scattered everywhere. It looked like there was like a thousand of them and they all just like bombed the top of this parking garage. But I managed to find a small spot that was poop free. And I sat there and I opened my, you know, my dinner and I just started to eat, enjoying the beautiful view. Everything seemed calm, everything seemed quiet. One of my favorite Parts of the day. For that exact reason, as I was sitting there appreciating, I was just like, man, like, I want to see what the view look like, my view, to give you a visual of it. Like, so because I'm sitting on the ground, there is a barrier at the end of the garage. So what I was seeing, I was a little bit set far back. So what I was seeing from my view was mostly like the parking lot. Although I did have a nice view of the buildings in the background with the sun. But, you know, if you. If I look just straight, it was all parking lot. So I had the idea, I was like, let me. Let me go walk around the mall, you know, the parking lot perimeter. So this way I want to just see what it looks like. But then I was like, well, no, maybe that's not a good idea. Because one, people have been known. There have been people who had jumped from the top of the parking lot to commit suicide. And the last thing I wanted to do was kind of draw attention to myself and get caught being up there when I'm not supposed to. So I kind of sat there and I was just like, all right, well, let's scratch that. I'm just going to stay here. I was staying there and eating, and then I was thinking to myself, I was like, well, I would never jump, right? I love my life. And I started to pan out of, you know, of my current situation and the stresses that I was feeling in the day. I started to pan out and look at the bigger picture. And looking at that bigger picture, I realized that everything was good, that I did love my life. I got to do my passion. I could travel the world. Everything was great. But isn't that true of life? Sometimes you're so focused on the things that's going wrong. The stressors in your day or in that moment that you say, bad moment, bad life, bad day, bad life, bad week, bad life, bad month, bad life, bad year or years, bad life when it's just not true. One thing that's guaranteed in life is pain, right? And you're gonna get challenged, you're gonna have to grow. But that doesn't mean that life is bad. Just because you have challenges doesn't mean that life is bad. Just because things aren't going your way in this moment doesn't mean that life is bad. So sitting up there, that was like the big realization. I was like, huh, that's pretty freaking cool. And then so I sat down there with this. With this new kind of outlook, and we're Just sitting there, waiting for the sun to come down. Shortly after the security guard, I hear something like a thump. And like, what the hell was that? I look, I turn my head and I see a guard coming up. And I was like, oh, shit, here we go. I'll just pretend like, he. Obviously, he's gonna tell me to leave, so I might as well just wait until he comes, you know, right there, rather than just kind of see him jump up and then, like, scatter away. Came near me, goes, hey, do you know you're not supposed to be up here? I was like, no, but thank you. I was like, you know, this is the best sunset in the city. He's like, yeah, you still can't be up here. I was like, well, lucky you, you get to enjoy it. I was like, well, thank you. See you later. And I went to. I went back downstairs to my car. I. By that point, you know, whether I saw the sun set or not, the benefit was already there. So then I. I was about to leave. And again, like, life happens in those small moments, right? Life doesn't happen in the. In the planning and like that. Let me do this, let me do that. It happens in those moments that you're not planning. The moments that you take to step outside of that routine. So I was going down. I was going back down to my car, and I was getting ready to leave. I was like, you know what? There is like a. There's a Chinese place there. It was a Shanghainese dumpling place. I was like, that place looks kind of cool. Let me just stop in and see it. I stopped in. I mean, the place was packed. It was. Supposedly. They have a. I think a restaurant in Flushing, and I think they have like some. I don't know if it's Michelin rated, which. I don't know if that means anything. And it's not a Michelin star, but they might have a mention in Michelin. But anyways, this. The restaurant was packed. So I looked around, I was like, well, I'm not waiting that line, because the line was all the way outside. But I saw one spot at the bar between two people, and so I kind of went over there. Hey, guys, at this seat taken? They, you know, they were like, no, it's free. And then. But it was like, it was really crammed. So both parties made space for me, and I ended up getting a. A dumpling sampler. And so it took a while for it to come. And I was ended up talking with a gentleman there who. I mean, this is kind of like A side story, but they were talking. It sounded like they were kind of drunk. But in my mind, I'm hearing them, but I'm also judging them. And then. But in my. But I have this habit of saying, well, no, rather when I catch myself doing that, I'm like, don't judge. Everyone's experience is unique. Appreciate. And so we ended up having a conversation. He started the conversation with me asking about, like, my dumplings, because they had all these, like, different colored dumplings. And turns out this gentleman traveled all around Asia. So we started connecting about travel and where he's been. And he was a big proponent of Macau. He's like, you got to go to Macau. It's amazing. Portuguese, blah, blah, blah. And I haven't been there yet. But he made it so interesting that I think I might stop there at some point. And long story short, well, one, the dumplings were amazing. They were very, very delicious. And it was exactly what I needed in my day to kind of add on to what I just experienced at top of the roo. Because having done that, I was so grateful that I just took a moment to step outside of my day and to experience something that I wanted to do, but I wasn't going to make the time. But I remind myself, you know what? Why not remembering that it's the moments that you don't plan that are the ones that are meaningful and that you'll remember. Those are the ones that take you out of the. That pattern of just living mindlessly. One of the things why I love traveling so much, because when I'm there, there is. There's no freaking plan. Well, for the most part, there's no plan. But I go and I explore and I experience new things. And as a result, my senses are wide open and I'm open to receiving whatever the universe, God, whatever they want to throw at me. Here I am. So why do I tell you this? I tell you this for several reasons. One is to just get perspective on. On your life. Imagine this. Imagine you are, you know, you're in your body, but all of a sudden, like, there's a little string that kind of pulls you out. And as it pulls you out, you're rising higher and higher and higher, and things are getting smaller and smaller and smaller. You still see yourself, but now you have perspective of everything else around you. You see the house, and as you pull away, you see how small everything is. And here's what happens when you do that. Try that out right now. One of the things that I notice is that you realize that your problems are even smaller. You get perspective on everything. You realize that it's just life, but it also helps you align to what's really important to you. And in the second part of the story I told you about, stopping at the dumpling is just making time to step out of that routine. When someone says, hey, you want to meet for a cup of coffee? And you're like, ah, shit, I don't really have the time. Just do it. Because more likely than not, you probably have a few minutes to spend time with a friend, even if it's only a few minutes. But the reason you're telling yourself you don't have time is just because it's spiraling in your head. Take the moment you know you'll appreciate it more and it'll add tons of value to your day because you'll be more present, you'll feel connected someone. And you know, happiness has more to do with the connections and the people that you interact with on a daily basis than whatever it is that you're achieving. Remember that. And so that's it. Enjoy life, right? Get perspective. Realize that things aren't as bad as you seem. But it's just the perspective. It's just the lens in which you are seeing it. So change the lens in which you're seeing the world and then your life will change. I hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you did, please give it a thumbs up, leave a comment or review for the podcast. It helps get the podcast out there. And as always, guys, if you have any questions, you can send them to me via my website@donnyrouse.com d o n n y r a u s.com thank you guys so much for tuning in. And remember, you only get one life. Live fully. Live passionately. Most of all, live now. God bless you guys and I will see you again soon.