Break The Spell

Hi, guys. My name is Donnie Rouse, and you are listening to the podcast One Life Break the Spell. Do you believe in spells? Well, you should, because chances are you're under one of them or many of them. And the a spell is just another word for a story or a belief that we hold. Because what our beliefs serve as, like, filters for our life, the beliefs we hold through. If we believe that people are nice, we look out into the world and we look for nice people. If we believe that the world is a beautiful place, we look for things in our external world to confirm that belief. And the opposite is true. If we look for reasons why we always are the victim, we will always be the victim. We'll always pull experiences from the external that make us the victim. So the purpose of this episode is to start to make you aware of the language that's going on in your mind and to make you more aware of the communication that you have with others. Because a lot of time you're spewing this stuff, but you're not conscious of it. This past week, I was at a farmer's at one of the farmers markets I do. And I was talking with a woman who came in, we'll call her Natty, for. For. For short. And we were. We got in, like, a really, really good conversation. We were talking about, like, upbringing. She was from somewhere in the Middle east that I was very curious about one day traveling. So that sparked my interest, and we started talking about, like, relationships. And she was telling me how she hadn't had anyone and that men were, you know, there weren't many good ones there. I think as she was walking away, she said to me, she said, you know what? You're a good guy. She's like, look, for a good girl. There aren't many out there. I was like, can you say that again? There aren't many out there. And then I asked her, I was like, well, can you say that one more time? She goes, there aren't many. Wow. And then it sunk in. So she had been saying the story over and over and over in her life that there weren't many men out there. As a result, that is what she got when she came across this realization. She thought back to younger years. She's about 50 years of age. And so she thought about her younger years and how people would always tell her that she was too picky, she was too picky, and that you're just too picky. Pick someone. So she developed a belief that there weren't enough good people out there. Is that True. The problem with these things is that we don't bother to check in to say, are they true. And one way to check in is literally by writing it on a sheet of paper. Is it true? I mean, instinctively, you might be like, well, yeah, it's true, because I haven't found anybody. But there has to be. You start to break down with that belief system. You can't put possibly know everybody, right? There's. I don't know how 3.5 billion people in this world, you mean to tell me that there's so few that, you know no one's like you and that you're perfect and, you know, she's an awesome person? I'm not saying that she's. She's not perfect, but I'm just trying to prove a point. Was that this. This scotoma, she. She was making it. She was narrowing it down so much that she wasn't able to find anybody. And she's a beautiful girl, great personality, beautiful smile, successful in business. And it was also a mirror for me because I say the same thing. I had this belief that, oh, well, you know, Europeans are so much more laid back. And, you know, I had this. Even being American, I had this belief about the American mentality, values. And so I always adopted or felt closer to people from different nationalities. Bullshit story in my head, I know. And I've been meeting people outside of that that are breaking that norm as a result of this. And what I want you to do is just to start to become aware of the stories that are controlling your life, the spells, so to speak. Because once you break the spell, you open yourself up to new possibilities. You're opening yourself up to. To new relationships, new opportunities, new experiences, if, you know, so they're, I guess. Well, how do you break the spell? If you have a friend who's very conscious and aware and picks up on language patterns, they can tell you, they can question you like, well, you know, you just said they're, you know, like that you. You never, you know, you never find anybody you like. But I remember you dating, like, at least a few people in the last month that you said you liked. And so that's bullshit. Or, you know, in breaking that pattern and catching you in that lie or that, that spell. Another way to do it is similar to, like, the gap analysis when you say, all right, well, where am I? What do I want? What are the beliefs that have that I have about this area of my life? So if you're not where you want, there's a story behind that. That you keep telling yourself as to why you don't have it. This is the spell. And when you're able to see them and write them down, then you can start to break it apart and start to question it. Then you can say, okay, you know, there. I don't have the money because my field. The field I'm in is too competitive. Too competitive. Okay. You might say, all right, yeah, well, you know what? It is competitive. But aren't there people making very, very good livings in that business despite the fact that it's competitive? Well, yeah. What are they doing? Are they. You know, are they doing the same. Are you doing the same thing that they're doing? Oh, no, they might be. You know, they do a lot more marketing that. A lot more visible, and. Yes. So once you start to question these things, you can start to break them down. And once you break the spell, then you could come up with a new spell, Something new. Maybe it's like, well, if this person can do it, then I can do it. And you develop a new belief system. And having that belief step in will propel you forward and give you the legs to run towards that destination, that desire that you have. Whoo. All right, that is it, guys. So if I'm gonna leave you with a bit of homework, it's just to do exactly that. Pick one area of your life. What is one area of your life where you're not getting the results you want? Why do you say, like, what are the stories that you tell? What are the spells that you put yourself under as to why you don't have it? Just write them down on a piece of paper. The next step, I want you to take each one of those line items and break it down as to why it isn't true. And then lastly, I want you to just kind of be cognizant of the words that you say when you're in conversation for the next few days, the rest of your life, Honestly, the rest of your life, but specifically the next few days. This way you can start to see any kind of patterns in your speech, but be aware of it for yourself, but also be aware of the people around you, especially the people close to you if you're with families, a spouse. Because a lot of time we take on beliefs from other people unintentionally, and before you know it, we're like, oh, yeah, you know, there. You know, there never have any opportunities or nothing ever works out for me. And, you know, you start to believe that, and it's something that you picked up unconsciously. So that is it, guys. This is a little bit of a shorter episode. If you enjoyed this episode, I ask you to please give me two thumbs up. And how you give two thumbs up is by leaving a feedback or a comment on Apple Podcasts, or by taking, well, and I should say not and not or and taking a screenshot, sharing it to your social media, and inviting your friends to listen to One Life Podcast with Donny Rouse. If you have any questions, feel free to send me a message via Instagram at D O n n Y R A U s Again, D O n N Y R A U s that concludes this episode of the One Life Podcast Mic Drop. God bless and I will see you next week.