Breaking Beliefs

Hi, guys. My name is Donny Rouse, and you're listening to the podcast One Life Breaking Beliefs. What if it is your subconscious beliefs that are preventing you from having the very thing you want, the life that you were meant to live? Often this is the case. We have this idea, this vision of what we want to create in our lives. But when we go to take action, we seem to always stumble. We seem to always hit resistance. When this happens, it's not a fault of your own. It's because there are subconscious beliefs there that were picked up in your childhood that are preventing you from having the thing you have. It's almost the equivalent of trying to move forward, but with your hand on the stick shift and throwing it reverse at the same time. As a result, your car starts to jerk back and forth and you're never really making that momentum, that movement forward. So how can we see what we want? How can we uncover those unconscious beliefs, the stories that we tell ourselves, and then switch it around so that it's now working in alignment? So this way we can move forward, we can move towards the things we desire. A mentor of mine, she was telling a story about how her daughter was watching tv and she said, hey, Mama, is Dora the Explorer real? Not really thinking much of the question, she goes, well, no, no, no, honey, Dora the Explorer is made up. Absorbing that answer, moments later, her daughter asks again, mama, is Oprah real? And she goes, well, yes, Oprah is real. And she made. She made a distinction. She goes, wow. My daughter did not know whether or not Dora the Explorer and Oprah were two real, were real people not being able to see fact from fiction. But how true is that? In our lives, we pick up beliefs from our parents, from the environments around us, without ever questioning their validity. I was in New York City. I was walking down 3rd Avenue with a friend of mine. As we were walking, we were just kind of sharing different emotions are views on relationships. And he was. I asked him a question. I said, well, you know, what is it? I know what you want in a relationship. He said, you know, he wanted a good girl. He wanted a girl who felt like his best friend. And he also wanted someone where he had that, like, while he was a best friend, there was that sexual charge, there was that sexual energy. So I said, okay, so this is what you want. What do you think's been preventing you from getting it? And he was going on about not really being able to find the right person. And I said, here, let me stop you right there. If you're saying that this is what you want. The reason why you don't have it is not because they're hard to find. What's holding you back is this unconscious, this programming that you have, this blueprint is what's preventing you from getting it. And I said, let me put it, let me reframe it. Where are you self sabotaging yourself if this is what you want? Where do you self sabotage yourself? So he went on and we were like, all right, well, yeah, I put energy into dates that I know are not going anywhere. That was one. Secondly, he might pursue something because there was a sexual charge of not necessarily a connection. And then third was seeing somebody, knowing that they're the type of person that he wants to meet, but not having the courage to go up there. I said, this is perfect. Okay, so these are the ways that you're self sabotaging yourself. Now if we look at each of those items, what is the belief, the guiding belief behind everything that you just said? You know, one was, I don't remember specifically, but I'll go along. The one with, you know, just being able to go and talk to the person. It was the belief that he may get rejected, the belief that he wasn't enough. And once you, he, like, once you made him aware, it's like, well, now what do you do next? The only thing to do next is to reframe that belief. Switch the belief to its reciprocal, to its opposite and start to ingrain that into your psychology through repetition. You can get a new habit through repetition, or you can get it through these theta, these other brain waves. How we learn through hypnosis, how we learn when we were growing up, repetition. I said, well, these are the new belief systems that we're going to create for you. This is what you have to focus on. And keep beating that into your head. When the old belief comes in, bam. You put the new belief in there through repetition. Eventually it will become real, as if you feel it and you say it with conviction. So I gave you an example of my friend and the relationships he's choosing to, that he wants to attract and where he's been kind of sabotaging himself. But let's bring it to you. What do you want in your life? Is it a job? Is it that trip? Is it the significant other like I mentioned with my friend? What does your conscious mind want? And if you're not getting what it is that you want, then what is your subconscious doing that's sabotaging you? What actions do you take that sabotage you from getting the very thing that you want, are you putting it off because you don't think you're good enough for it? Are you? I mean, depending on where you are, it's going to be different. But look at every, write down every, this is your homework. What is it that you want? You could break this down to every single area of your life and then look at the subconscious program. If you don't have that very thing that you're saying you want. What are the sabotaging beliefs, the actions that are preventing you from doing that? What do you do to sabotage yourself? Maybe it's turning on TV because you're just trying to dismiss it. You don't think it's going to work anyways. Maybe it is dating the wrong person. Maybe it is postponing that trip that you want to take. Maybe it is grabbing a bag of Cheetos rather than going to the gym. What is it then? Once you've written down all these self sabotaging actions that you've been taking, I want you to then say what is the belief in order for me to take this action to sabotage myself? What is the belief that's leading that action? You might write down, you know, like the Cheetos thing I gave rather than go to the gym. Well, that maybe the belief is, well, it's too tough, I'll never get the body I want, so why try? Once you've listed down all the beliefs that are behind those self sabotaging actions, I want you to flip them around. What is the reciprocal? If the going to the Cheetos example, If it is, you know what, it's never going to happen. Why try? Maybe switching to say results compound. Every day I am growing more and more right? Because from someone who's done physique contests, I can tell you with regard to your body, that's exactly how it works. You don't see results in one day, you don't see results in a week, Sometimes you don't even see results in a month. But there's a compound effect as of taking these small actions, you start to see the results and then all of a sudden you start to get even more excited and you start to get more pumped up and you keep moving forward and you continue to change and grow. After you have this list, after you flipped those beliefs, your next job is just to kind of keep looking at that list, notice where you're getting up. Sometimes just noticing these self sabotaging beliefs or the actions is enough to stop them in their track, is enough to say, okay, I know what you're in the act and you see yourself taking that self sabotaging action. You notice that you say, okay, you know what, I'm not doing this. I know what I'm doing here. I'm sabotaging myself and I am not willing to sabotage my happiness. And sometimes just the awareness alone is enough. But then other times it is matter of fact, seeing self sabotaging action and then reaffirming this new belief that you have. Do that over enough, with conviction, with feeling, you will change the feeling you have, you will change that belief and you will take new action as a result of it. As I hope you enjoyed this podcast. This has been like this was actually a big, big lesson for me, which is why I wanted to come here and share with you. Because you may have heard over and over and you may consciously know this is what's happening in the background, but this actually gives you a structure on how to break it down. So this way you understand it and you see where you're getting hang up and you could get clearer on what the guiding beliefs are. So this way you could change it. It's all about becoming conscious because you can't change something you're not conscious of. So again, I hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you did, please give it a thumbs up. Share it with your friends and your family. This is Donnie Rouse signing off. God bless and I will see you again soon.