Do or Do Not - The Truth About Goals

Most people spend their entire life stressed without ever giving a single thought as to what it is they really want or what's important to them. See, I'm here to cut through all that noise, connecting you to yourself and the life that you were meant to live. I used to slave away at a corporate job that I hated, but I broke through the social norms and pursued my passion. As a result, I own my own coffee company. I'm espresso sommelier, and I get to travel the world. You, too, can live a life that you love, but it starts with getting clear about what you want. It starts with a new decision. I'm your host, Donnie Rouse. You are listening to the podcast One Life. Do or do not. There's no such thing as try. You either do or you do not. For some of you Star wars fans, you might recognize those words. That was a direct quote from the Yoda. Yoda was talking about talking to Luke Skywalker, training him. And I don't recall the scene. Something had fallen into, like, a swamp or something like that. And Luke says, oh, I'm trying to do something, whatever that thing was. And Yoda goes, there is no try. There's do or there's do not. When I heard that statement, I was actually in a seminar that a friend of mine was put on my friend Romain. And I was like, well, wow, it makes so much sense, because words really hypnotize us. When you say you're trying something, trying something, trying something, you're really somewhere in the back of our mind, we could kind of make that kind of a scapegoat. Well, we're trying to do something. So it kind of lets us off the hook if things don't go as planned or if we don't fulfill or meet that outcome. But when you actually stop to think about that, there is no such thing as try. You either do it or you do not. So the key then is, is to become very conscious and very selective of the outcomes that we aim for. For instance, I was relating this to. I was thinking about travel. I was like, what are the things that I'm committed to in my life? Actually, travel wasn't the first thing that came up. I was actually thinking about this podcast. There had been times where I'm like, well, where is this thing going? You know, I enjoy doing it, but it feels. Sometimes it feels like it's dragging on. Not in the sense of doing the episodes, but getting the podcast, attracting the following that I want. Doing the opening, doing the ending, figuring out where I should put an ad spot, all the things that go into doing a podcast. And I would say, oh, I'm trying to do this, I'm trying to do this. But there is no try. When I said, all right, what am I trying to do? Not do, what am I committed to? And I was, well, I'm committed to making this podcast a worldwide following. Okay, that was something I'm committed to. Then I was looking at it. Well, everything that I'm doing, right. I'm not trying to make the podcast. I am doing it. Because every time, like, there's always these little steps. You may have noticed. Well, hopefully you noticed that there's an intro on the podcast. There was never an intro on the podcast, but it literally. And it's something I had wanted to do for a while now. But then there's sometimes you hit that tipping point where, like, all right, you've been stalling on action. Then all of a sudden there's something that just kind of maybe pushes you over the edge, or sometimes you're just in a great state and you're like, you know what? I'm going to conquer that now. Let's go. And then what you were putting off for years happens in a matter of minutes. Can you relate? Another thing was, well, what else am I committed to? I was like, I want to travel and see every country in the world. As I thought about that statement, well, I'm like, well, yeah, it's kind of like. Kind of like an ego thing, too, which is. It's a great goal for an ego, right? Because I think it would actually really like cultural me. It'll really grow me as an individual to see all these different cultures, experience different people, traditions, foods, lalala. But, like, I didn't really. There's a lot of countries that I really don't care to go to. So if I was honest with myself. So I was thinking about, well, why do I want to get these. Why. Why are there some things that I want? But I don't really feel that. That. That. That drive or that. That pull towards them like several countries that I was going to visit. And then it got me to thinking about the types of goals we choose. I was talking to one of my friends, and he brought up this thing called the Kaizen planning method. And he shared with me one of the practices he did. He said, well, he wrote down all the things he wants on little sticky notes, and this might be something that you would want to try. So he wrote down all the things that he wants, and he literally just kept putting them Down. And then at the end, he goes, well, all right, what is it that. Like, that I want? And what is society telling me that I want? And as he was doing this, he would separate the two sticky notes out, put him in categories, but also separating out the goals that were given to him by the culturescape. Some of those goals could be make a million dollars. Well, what do I want a million dollars for? I don't know, but it sounds like a great goal, you know? Sure. But you gotta remember everything in life. It's not like money is not the end. Money is the means to the end. Right. So if you want to do. If you want the million dollars. Why do you want the million dollars? Oh, it'll give me great. Better, more security. I'd be financially free. I could take my family on vacation. I could travel the world. I wouldn't have to be a slave to my job. I could do something I love or I'm passionate about, and I could give back freely without having to worry about, like, the fun, whatever it may be. That is the end. The money is the means to get there. So why do I tell you this? I tell you this to help you evaluate the things that you want in life as well as where you're putting priorities. Now, I'm not saying drop everything, go travel, although I totally endorse that methodology if you want to do it, but you have to with everything. It's a balance. You have to do it smart. So going back to do or do not. Let's start by asking ourselves a few questions. What is it that I am currently doing? All of the different activities, all of the different things that are taking up your time right now. Now, that could be, you know, maybe it's a podcast. Maybe it's, you know, doing. Trying to work towards a certain position at work. Maybe it is starting your own business. Maybe it is something like leisurely, like travel, like wanting to go to Italy or whatever it may be. Looking at those goals, I want you to separate out which goals were given me by society and which goals are coming from my heart. And after you've done that, the next thing I want you to ask yourself is where? What. Which of these goals have I said I've been trying? Right, where you. Maybe you haven't been making the progress on your physical health. Separate them out. Like, where have you been trying? Where are the ones you've been totally committed to? And when you hold that little. That sticky note up. So do I want to go forward with this or do I do not? And it's really just a level commitment. It's saying, like, how committed am I to this, this particular outcome? One more side note. So I was, I woke up this morning and I've been trying to make the habit. Oh, you just caught myself saying trying. I'm making the habit of exercising, stretching before every single. Every morning, right when I wake up, right. Because my body's usually tight from laying down. So I want to stretch. I want to be more flexible. As I was sitting there, I was like, oh, well, you know, I just woke up. I don't know if I really have the time to do some yoga right now. And I said, no, no, no, no, there is no trying. What is the outcome that I want? I want more flexibility in my hips. I want to have that range of motion to feel freedom. What does it require me to do? Requires me to stretch. I can't have the thing without doing the action item again. Going back to what am I committed to? And I either do it or I do not do it. So after you've separated that out, decide to take some action and listen. There's, there's, it's really more powerful language because when you, whether you say you're trying to do something, you may realize you've been saying trying, trying, trying all the time, but you have been doing it. Going back to my podcast intro, I've been saying, oh, I'm trying to make an intro. I'm trying to, you know, build the podcast to X followers. But saying that I'm trying is almost like takes away the energy from what I'm doing because I am doing it. I'm taking actions to move it forward. I'm showing up every day. It is requiring me to take new actions to do it. But I am in the process. So there is no trying. There is doing. So that is all I've got for you guys today. I hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you did, please give it a share. Give it a thumbs up and share in a comment. Let me know what is it that you found yourself that you said you were committed to? Maybe you're not committed to anymore or where have you said you've been trying and you developed a new, more energy around it where you say, you know what? This is what I'm gonna move forward for. This is what I'm going to do, not try anymore. I'd love to hear your thoughts on that. So thank you guys so much for tuning in. If you like this podcast, please hit the subscribe button. If you like any of the episodes and you want to hear more about a specific topic, please feel free to send me a message via my website at donnyrous.coM-O-N n y r a u s.com there. You can also you guys questions, leave comments, you can purchase some awesome Rouse coffee, you can schedule a coaching session with me. So that is all I've got for you guys today. And as always, thank you so so much for tuning in. I realize that you could be put your attention anywhere watching anything. But you're choosing here, you're choosing to put your focus guiding you inward towards the things that you truly desire, your heart and really trying to look for the things that are going to make you happy, not being guided by the external world. So I commend you in that and I thank you for tuning in. So God bless you guys so much. Thank you so much for tuning in and I will see you again soon.