Feeling Good - The Meaning of Life

Most people spend their entire life stressed without ever giving a single thought as to what it is they really want or what's important to them. See, I'm here to cut through all that noise, connecting you to yourself and the life that you were meant to live. I used to slave away at a corporate job that I hated, but I broke through the social norms and pursued my passion. As a result, I own my own coffee company, I'm espresso sommelier, and I get to travel the world. You too can live a life that you love, but it starts with getting clear about what you want. It starts with a new decision. I'm your host, Donnie Rouse. You are listening to the podcast One Life, Feeling Good. I will argue that the main point in life is about feeling good. So if feeling good is the aim for everything that we're looking at to achieve, to go after, it kind of like helps us look at each individual goal, look at the things that we're going for. We're kind of like a magnifying glass and say, okay, well, how is this making me feel? Is this something that makes me feel good, or is this something that makes me feel a little bit not so good? But it's not enough to ask that question because it's kind of a tricky question because sometimes those things that are going to make us grow and feel more alive don't always feel good, at least in the beginning. So I'm not referring to those things. Right. What I want to connect with you about is more of understanding that whatever goal we have, the entire we choose something because we want to feel good, we want the end result, but to just go after the end result, it's kind of stupid. Without thinking, without really taking into account the journey. What's the point of setting out on a journey if you're only going to enjoy the end destination and it's going to be treacherous the entire way through? The point I'm trying to make is that I want you to set yourself up to notice what are worthy goals, what are not worthy goals, but also to set yourself up for success so that you enjoy the journey. So I'm gonna give you a few guiding questions and I want you to think about a goal that you're any goal. It could be your. It could. Let's look at your work or a category of your life. Like your work, for example. How do you feel going into every day? Do you feel good? Do you feel not so good? Where do you need to make an adjustment? Kind of a side note, just talking about work I was talking to a friend, and she was. We were talking about travel, and she was asking me about the travels I'd been on, and I was sharing her suggestions for some of the places that she wanted to go to, like Peru. And she was telling me that when she's at work, sometimes she just literally stops and asks herself, like, what the F am I doing here? Like, what am I doing with my life? I told her that's like a tap on the shoulder saying, hey, remember me? We need to do something to change. It doesn't feel good here. And those feelings are going to amplify until finally she hits that tipping point and she decides to make the change. So let me kind of take a back step and kind of give you the inspiration behind this podcast. So I was talking with one of my friends. We were going over the area of our finances. We're talking about our portfolios, like, how to split the portfolios around what percentage we should put in security and what percentage we should put in risk. And these percentages are different for everybody based on your risk tolerance. So he asked me, what is it that you. What do you want to put in your risk? And I was like, all right. The first thing I came up with was 60, 40. All right, I'll put 60% for my risk, 40 for security. I chose those percentages because I'm like, well, I'm 40 years old now. I have at least 20 years. So there's a good period of time where I can manage some risk, where if the market goes down, there is still time. Like, over time. I think over a period of 15 years, the market's always ended up higher with an average return of something like 7%, if I remember correctly. So as a result, I was willing to take more risks. But then we kind of broke it down even further. Like, all right, well, within the risk category, what are the options? What can you invest in? There's stocks, there's bonds, there's crypto, there's currency, there's commodities, all these different asset options. And when we were talking about crypto, I felt, like, uneasy. I'm like, well, one, I don't really know enough about it. And two, there's like a whole dark web to this stuff. And I just didn't feel like this doesn't feel good to me. And as I said that, he's, well, no, that's okay, right? Because the outcome of this is to feel good. He's like, if we're going to try to build a portfolio for you. Right. If we're going to build a portfolio and you're going to get, say, let's throw a number like say 20% returns on your money. What's the point? Even if you get those returns, what's the point if the entire time you're stressing and you're worrying about the portfolio, about what's going to happen to if this particular investment vehicle drops, if it's volatile? What. What's the point? The whole point of this is to set yourself up for the future and to have the feelings that you want. But how often do we do that in life, right? Do we look for that? We know what we want and we're moving in the direction of it. But then the path, it's just like this treacherous journey trying to get there, and the feelings aren't good. So the question that, I mean, I get, I guess the awareness that comes around, that is, when we're faced with that, what other paths can we take? Going back to the example of my asset allocation, I mean, there's crypto is one thing, one investment vehicle out of many that you can do, and every single one of it for the person is going to carry a different, different kind of a different energy to it. So maybe if I was really worried about risk, then maybe I should rethink my percentages. Maybe I should be like maybe 40, 60, 40% risk, 60% security. So it's important to check in and say, okay, well, one, how do I feel good about the thing that I am doing so that I enjoy the ride, I enjoy the journey? Maybe it's working out. Like, sometimes working out could be a hassle, right? If you don't have the internal motivation. I mean, I'll speak from my own experience. Sometimes I will go to the gym and I feel very excited to be there. I'm ready to work out. Other times I'm just like, all right, I feel like I'm pushing through. I feel good afterward. But the, the journey, like in the workout, doesn't always feel good. So how can I make it feel better? I could recruit someone to work out with. I could remind myself of the vision before and kind of like prime myself before I work out. Sometimes I literally just get in there, I go work out, so this way I can get out. But reminding ourselves of the reasons and the outcomes we want for that particular action or whatever it is we're doing can sometimes make all the difference. It can remind us of what we're doing. And all of a sudden, now we come with this renewed excitement, with renewed passion and purpose. Towards the activity that we're about to undertake. So let's look at life. So if life is about feeling good, where are the areas that are taking away from that life force, that energy that is there? Right? Because we have, like, I don't want to say a finite energy, but we have to be conscious of this meter, right? This meter is like, well, things feel good, things feel bad. And when things aren't feeling right, we have to know when to change them. We have to know when to make these adjustments. Sometimes it's a big adjustment, sometimes it's a small adjustment, but we have to make the adjustment to feel good. And it's a matter of coming up with options in order, how to do that. So let's go back to your life. What is an area of your life where you know what you want, but the journey or the way, like, the way to get there doesn't really feel good, right? Or maybe you kind of like hit resistance along the way. How might you be able to change that? Or what shifts need to be made in order to make the feel, the feelings of it feel better? Sometimes this could come down to a belief change. I was talking with someone, with a friend last night about my business, and I had the belief that I had to. That my business had to be built a certain way. And as a result of being built a certain way, I felt kind of captive to my business because I'm like, well, you know, the passion I get. Like, I love coming on here, sharing my thoughts, my wisdom that I've obtained through life on this podcast here. And I love doing espresso consulting and teaching people. So for a while, I felt like the two were incongruent. Right? Well, how can I have the business and do all this other stuff that really fills me up, that makes me feel passionate and makes me feel alive? So I felt at odds. I felt like I was literally kind of always hitting a wall. Whenever that happens, it's always very good to speak to somebody about it, because usually it's a limited way of thinking, right? We've literally locked ourselves into a way of looking at things that we create a scotoma. We can't see anything outside of it. So if we want to see new options, we have to shift our focus to seeing what the things that we're not looking at, the things that we're not noticing. One of the easiest ways to do that is by sharing your thoughts, your feelings with friends, because they could help you shine a light into a different area where you weren't in Focus. So I was sharing with a friend and a couple friends. One of them was like, well, why would you think that you would have to do this and this, like, that's not your, that's not what you started the business for. That's not what you're passionate about. This is stuff for other people. Why would you think that you have to do this? I'm like, well, yeah, I didn't really think about that then. I was. When my friend last night, we were talking about my business, I was kind of explaining to him and you know, this shows that we have loops that we go in in our life, right? These thought process that literally will cycle. And he said, listen, you have the hardest part done. Like you have the business, you have a concept, you have everything. He's like, what makes you think that? Why is this fixed way of going about your business? Why are you locked into this? That's not how it has to be. Like, you know, you could hire people to do X, Y and Z and do the thing that you love, building the brand, building the image, being the face of your company. You can have everything you want. You can have everything you want. We have to first become also aware of just the stories we tell ourselves, the belief systems that are in place. So again, it comes down to feeling good. Like the goal of life is to be happy. The goal of life is to feel good. You could have a million dollars in the bank. If you're emotionally poor, you are poor, you could have nothing in the bank. But if you're emotionally rich and happy, then you're rich. So in closing, I want you to just think about. I feel like I'm closing out. Like I'm speaking a little bit differently now because I'm bringing something different to it. Think about the goals in your life. In the Western world, we're trained to be like, we have to go after all these things that society tells us we need. But in reality, we, we might be happy with a different life. We might be happy making a choice to maybe move out of the country. Maybe it's live in. One story comes to mind was a guy who moved to, I think he's in India and he's helping women who are, who are like slaves in sex trafficking. I mean, his job probably doesn't pay anything, nearly anything. I mean, but I'm sure the fulfillment he must get out of that is beyond anything that I could comprehend, right? Because I mean, he's giving himself to another person. He's serving in a way that's like, I mean I donated to the cause and I felt great donating to it. But is he making a million dollars? No. But I'm willing to bet that he is very emotionally rich. So again, in closing, put the focus on the things that are going to make you feel happy. I'm a true believer that when you find that thing that you love, putting all of your attention there, there's always a way to make your passion to bring happiness and abundance in your life by following your passion. It's going to require, again, it's going to require growth. It's going to require a different way of looking. It's going to require you to learn how to build a business and do certain things. But maybe that's not even that important. Maybe you're okay with 30, $40,000 a year living comfortable. Maybe you want to live in another country. One of the things I've learned from traveling in other countries is that sometimes the poorest of the places that have little seem to be the happiest. I mean, I think I could read people's smiles. When I see smiles, I know when they're genuine. I know when they're acting. And if you pay attention to someone's face, you can see whether they're really happy or if they're really screaming inside. And I see these people and they're just exuberant. They have like these beautiful smiles, yet they're poor. So in closing, just think about the goals you're going for, why you're going for them in the first place, and what feelings do they give you. That is all I've got for you guys today, so I hope you enjoyed this post. If you did, please give it a share. Consider subscribing. Because again, the intention here is to bring your. Bring your focus to the things that you want in life. So that we kind of drowned out. By putting your attention here, we drowned out all the other noise in the background. Focusing on the noise that's in here. Not the noise, the voice that's in here in your heart, because that is really what's going to make you happy. But it takes a conscious effort. So by listening to this over and over, like all the different podcasts that I do, my intention is to bring that to you. So thank you so much for tuning in. I appreciate, and I am grateful for you tuning in because I realized that you could be putting your attention anywhere else. Listening to YouTube, watching your friends updates what she ate for lunch yesterday on Instagram. But I'm glad that you're here because again, it's all about you. And I'm grateful to be here. I'm grateful to be able to share my experiences, to hopefully enhance and make your life better. So thank you so much for tuning in. If you like this, you can leave a comment, you can ask a question, you can buy some awesome Rouse coffee. You can do so by visiting www.donnyrouse.com d o n n y r a u s.com God bless you guys. Thank you so much for tuning in and I will see you again soon.