Generally Speaking: The Best Way to Set Goals

Hi, guys. My name is Donnie Rouse and you are listening to the podcast One Life. Generally speaking, we have been brought up learning that it is better to be specific about our goals rather than to be general. And when we were told, we were said that, well, by being specific, we know exactly what it is that we're going after. So this way we could know whether or not we are successful or not in its achievement and whether we have to tweak the process. But what if everything you knew about goal setting was wrong? What if it were better to be general about setting those goals, at least in the beginning, rather than being specific? What if that was the key in order to getting better results for whatever it is that you're aiming towards? I'm about to share with you an experience that I had with my own business and kind of like some of the lessons I learned recently. But before I do so, I want to plant a few questions into your mind. So this way, as you listen to it, you could better understand the lessons that I'm about to share with you. So how, when you've planned goals in the past, how have you gone about it? Have you gone very specific and granular, or did you start general and then kind of narrow down? My thoughts is that you went specifically and that by going specific, what you realize was, is that you kind of lost sight of the objective in the first place. And then I want you to understand what is the result that you've had from that? Was it leaving you closer to the goal or was it taking you further away? Then next I want you to get more coarse or take a step further, like further out from the goal, looking at your goal from a thousand feet high. And then I want you to say, well, what is it that you want? And when you look at that thing that you want, I want you to say, well, how does it feel when I generally state what it is that I'm going after? How do I feel about it? And I want you to notice how that feels. The change you feel versus going very, very granular. The past year has been a tremendous learning experience for me, both as it pertains to just life as well as for my business. When I set out on my business, I was doing what I told you not to do in the beginning, being very specific about the goals. I was saying, okay, well, this is how I'm going to go forward. I'm going to put my coffee into food stores and I'm going to grow out. I'm going to expand, using distributors and going like the traditional route. But there was a problem with that. And the problem was I didn't take into account the type of life that I wanted to live. I didn't take into account what it meant to be successful in my eyes. So as a result of being very granular, I was committing to actions that kind of had me literally going in a circle and focusing on things that weren't going to inch me towards the end outcome, which I'm about to get to. So what I felt from as a result of doing that was it was actually making me a little bit more anxious. I wasn't getting the traction that I wanted, and as a result, I wasn't getting the result. But then I started doing something different. I was listening to a video by Mike Dooley and he was mentioning something about being very general with the way you set goals. And I hadn't really heard that before. I was like, being general with my goals. Why would I want to be general with my goals? And as I was watching this video, I started to ask myself the question, what is. What is like the. The thousand foot up view of the goal that I want? And I looked at my business, I said, well, all right, well, for my business, I want to do something I'm passionate about. I want freedom of location, to be able to go travel, do things. Not that I want to travel 24 7, because even traveling gets boring. But I wanted the freedom and flexibility to be able to work from anywhere that I want. And I wanted to inspire people and I wanted to have impact. That was the overview of everything that I wanted to achieve. When I compared it to the granular goal that I had set early, early on in my career without ever questioning, there was no way I was going to get to where I wanted to go because I was taking all the wrong actions. But now with this overview, I had a clearer picture as to what it is that I was aiming for in the first place. And as a result, new actions to take. So with this now, my actions, the steps to move forward become very clear. The steps mean. All right, well, continuing to come on here to do social, use social media to inspire people at the beginning of their day through that cup of coffee, I get to put my passion to it because I love looking for new coffees, I love figuring out the roast profiles for them, and I love developing, like, new ways of interacting with the coffees. All these things. I could have it all and you could have it all if you just decide to ask a better, different question, I would say, and a better question, but a Different question than what you're currently asking. So let's ask again. How have you set goals in the past? Were you getting very, very specific and granular, or were you taking a more general approach to the goal? I'm willing to bet that you were actually more granular because that's how we've been taught. Smart goals be specific, measurable. So I want you to kind of reframe how you look at your goals. Having done that, what have been the result you've gotten? Were they moving you towards the direction you want to go or were they pulling you further back? And then thirdly, I want you to ask yourself that third question, which is, what is the thousand foot high view of my goal? Like, if I were a thousand feet up, looking down, what is like the general sense, the general feeling, the general thing that I want. And then as you state this aloud, hopefully I want you to sense, how do you feel in this moment as you're saying these things, saying, maybe it's your body, maybe, rather than saying, you know, I need to lose 13 pounds, I want to have energy to run a marathon, all these other things. Taking the general approach would be like, you know what, I want to look great in clothing. I want to have tons of energy and, and I want to feel vibrant and playful. It's a different feeling, a very different feeling, actually. You're focusing on the feeling. That's one of the biggest differences of it. And then what happens after that? Right? So we made a general thing. We're like, well, how does that make sense, right? We stated the general goal, but how do we get further? How do we inch closer to what it is we want if we're not getting that specificity? Once you have that general goal, the specificity will come because now it's a matter of the contrast. Now it's a matter of having things show up saying, okay, well, how does this equate to my goal? How does this take me further? Does this take me further away or closer? And then you make adjustments. And as you make the adjustments, you get more and more unclear about what it is that you want. Going back to the example of my coffee business, when I just started out, the coffee business, there's no way I could have possibly have known what it was that I wanted because I didn't know what the path was. I didn't know I couldn't see 10ft in front of me. And the problem was it was that I kept that goal. I kept that vision for most of my professional career until I actually asked a different question now. I see things differently. So I don't want that to happen to you. I don't want you to waste years of your life going in a direction only to realize that you were going in the wrong direction or that you have to change course. We always have to change course, and I don't regret any of it. But the point is, I want to share this with you so this way you can get more fulfillment and feel more of those feelings that you want out of life. So that is all I've got for you guys today. I hope this shed some light as to the process of setting your New Year's resolutions. I'm doing this on January 1st, although I might post it later. This post is being done January 1, 2022 and the intention is help you get clear about your goals to give you that momentum to realize one. You know, it's okay to be general and just trust in the process. Let things. There's a quote that I like. It's a matter of letting things be what they are, not what you expect them to be. Be patient with yourself. Be calm to you and be loving to yourself. That is all I've got for you guys today. Hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you did, please subscribe to the podcast so this way you don't miss a single episode. And if you would like to ask a question, please purchase any of the Rouse Coffee, my delicious coffees. You can do so by visiting www.donnierouse.com again www.donnierouse.Com as always, thank you so much for tuning in. I am grateful that you're listening to me because I realize you're taking time out of your day where you could be listening to a million other things who are asking for your attention. But you're here bettering yourself, trying to give yourself a different perspective on life. That is it, guys. God bless and I will see you again soon.