Guiding Questions - How to Bring Magic Into Your Day

Most people spend their entire life stressed without ever giving a single thought as to what it is they really want or what's important to them. See, I'm here to cut through all that noise connecting you to yourself and the life that you were meant to live. I used to slave away at a corporate job that I hated, but I broke through the social norms and pursued my passion. As a result, I own my own coffee company. I'm espresso sommelier, and I get to travel the world. You too can live a life that you love, but it starts with getting clear about what you want. It starts with a new decision. I'm your host, Donnie Rouse, and you are listening to the podcast One Life Guiding Questions. Do you ever feel like you're asking yourself a bunch of shitty questions? And the way you know if you're asking yourself a bunch of shitty questions is by the shitty feeling that you're experiencing? Anytime we have questions going on in our minds, but the problem arises that we're not conscious of them. And these questions were put there usually trying to avoid fear or something that we didn't want to experience. And as a result of going down this path so frequently, you created imagine like a highway. You created highway with very little resistance. And now as a result, it's super easy to go down this highway, right? Think of your experiences on a daily basis. How often do you experience the same things over and over? It's because you've created this neural bundle that says, all right, well, this place is easy. This feels like home. Let's go in that direction. And as a result, you start to feel and experience the same emotions day in and day out. But in order to actually experience something more full and rich in life, we have to change our experience. We have to change our focus. We got to change the questions we are asking ourselves. This is something that I am currently working on for my own life, just bringing more empowering questions. So this way I could live a life that when I wake up, I want to feel passionate, I want to feel alive, I want to feel like I cannot wait for today versus oh, man, shit, this again, you know? So questions are the answer, because questions are going to realign your focus. And by creating the pattern in your life and going there frequently enough, it becomes easier. So let's start before we go into a story about my life and maybe bring some other examples. Let's start with some of the questions that you're asking or maybe just even some of the feelings like what do you feel on a daily basis when you wake up, how do you feel like when you, when you wake up, do you feel like, man, I can't wait for another day, or do you feel like shit this another day? You know, what is it that you feel? And then secondly, what questions are operating in the background? And you don't have to know exactly what those questions are, but you can literally just reverse a process. So you're right. If this is what I am feeling, what question would I have to ask myself in order to feel this way? And it's a good indicator as to what is going on in the background. What, you know, like the computer program that's running that you may not even be conscious of. And then the last part is, all right, well, how do I want to feel like if I could wake up and feel passionate, if I could feel grateful, how would I have to guide my thoughts? What would I have to think about? I just done a vlog recording that I send out to people who subscribe to my newsletter. And in that email I use the example of a street, right? You have a two lane highway. One highway is those negative questions and negative feelings, all that stuff that you've been habituated to feel. And the other highway, it's not even a highway yet, right? You see the frame for a highway and it's not even paid. So on that shitty highway on the left hand side, it is, you know, it looks like it's, you know, it looks pretty smooth. And it's just because you had been going over it so many times and you've been maintaining the road with your shitty thoughts and that is why it's running so smoothly. But there's something happens when you start to say, okay, you know what, instead of going there, let me start to think this way about my day. And by putting yourself in the place, by asking yourself more empowering questions and guiding your thoughts in your day, all of a sudden that road that was making you not feel so good starts to deteriorate. Because no longer it's not getting any use, it's not getting any maintained, right? Because it's like the, you know, imagine just like diminishing the resources. Like the city's like, well, no one's driving on that road and people are switching over to this road. Let's start to build this road here. So this way, you know, it's safe and we can get a lot of through traffic on here. So as a result that that shitty road that you were on that was not making you feel good starts to crack, it starts to crumble. Starts to decay. Trees start growing in the analyst. And there's a tree in the center of the lane, right? Because no one's going over anymore. It's not maintained. But now this new road where you are, people are just flying fast or smiling in their car. They have convertibles, they're all like, you know, driving, hair blowing, if they have hair. So what the reason I'm telling you this, and I'm not telling you this at lecturing you, saying, like, oh, you need to correct your thoughts, right? Because this is all I'm sharing my own experiences and where my thoughts have gone and what I am doing now in order to work, to correct, to retrain my mind, to go to the places I want to go, to experience the feelings I want to experience on a daily basis. Because life is composed of your days, Your weeks are composed of your days, your months are composed of your weeks, your life, you know, whatever, it goes on, right? But it all starts in this moment, is what I'm trying to say. I was talking with a friend, and this friend of mine, she was explaining how she. One of her biggest fears was being alone. And it was hard for me to comprehend because if you know this person, you know that she is a heart of gold. And she's very kind, very giving to everybody. It's just like unfathomable. Like, well, why would you ever think that you would ever be alone? Touches many lives. So it's kind of like I couldn't put the two together and there's no way I could. But what was likely the cause was a way of looking at things that was causing her to always feel alone, or the fear that she would be alone and would never meet anyone. And what I want to convey to you is that the more you are catering to those thoughts, the more you are going to feel them. Because energy goes, emotion goes where energy flows. And I was trying to get her to say, well, you know, ask a different question. To look at all the people who were in her life and that there was no conceivable way that she could ever be alone. And with that, I'll kind of give you an example right here. In order to feel like you're alone, what kind of questions would you have to ask yourself? You'd probably ask yourself, why does someone always leave me? Why? What if I am alone? Or you ask yourself very disempowering questions, but what if we can change that? What if we could change a script? What if we can ask something more empowering that would help us uncover the Gems that are currently in our life that maybe we're not looking at. I just gave you a hint as to what that question was. What? If you ask the question, who are the people in my life that I'm failing to recognize and acknowledge that will always be with me, it's like, oh shit, huh? One of the questions I'll go into is I ask the same thing. I try to look for what I am not noticing. Because what you notice, what is in your frame, you notice. And a lot of the time by noticing it, you take it for granted. So there is like a scotoma, it's there, but you don't see it. So that is the question. If you are, you know who you are listening to this, if you ask that question, I'd love to see what your results are. Maybe you're experiencing the same thing. Maybe the thing that freaks you out is being alone or anything you're experiencing. Ask yourself, how do you already have that, that maybe you just haven't noticed in the past? For me, you know, like one of my, some of my happiest times of course are like my more my travels. When I'm back home, a lot of the time I feel like I'm charging forward. I'm, you know, being driven by some ambition that I have and a lot of times I could do that at the expense of my well being. And that is one of the things I'm working on now is just kind of bringing more consciousness into my day and the habits to really get the emotions that I want out of my day. And being, you know, living here in Stanford, I had taken a lot of things for granted. You know, being around my family, my siblings, because I'd wanted so badly just to change, to experience something new. So I came up with the question that I ask myself in the morning as well as periodically throughout my day, is what are the blessings and gifts in my life that I am not recognizing or that maybe I haven't recognized or acknowledged before? And when I asked myself that question now all of a sudden, like the things that were not even in focus are all of a sudden coming into focus and I start to see things differently. I'm like, oh, well, you know what? I'm very grateful to have my parents, right? How many people have their parents? I know people who have lost their parents and they would give anything just for one minute with their parents for a hug. To have so many siblings, to live in a city where I'm surrounded, like I'm looking at my backyard right now and it's lush, it's green, and there's grass. I've been to places that were desolate and freaking desert. So it makes me appreciate the fact that I'm looking at greenery, the fact that I have a business where I get to touch so many people with my coffee. These things could only come to light by asking a different question. If I was stuck in that, if I let myself by default go into the state that I wake up in, I'm giving the reins to someone else. I'm giving the reins to the television, my past conditioning, whatever it is that was implanted in my mind and that I allowed to grow. But by asking yourself a different question now, what you're doing is you're tilling the soil and allowing something new to come, something more empowering. And just like that road that disintegrated, it's like a tree, right? You have two trees. One you were nurturing without even knowing it. And all of a sudden, now, without the nutrients, that tree starts to die. The disempowering habits and patterns of thinking start to die, and the one that you are cultivating now starts to grow. And do it long enough and you won't even recognize who you are and how you were ever that person in the past. And that is really the process of transformation. So I had been talking about the one Life course, my course that I'm currently building and will be releasing on September 4th. And the first part of the equation is getting clear about what it is that you want, knowing what you want so you can go in that direction, and it cuts out other options. But then the other half is doing the work. It's not enough just to say, oh, I know what I want, because there's all these things in the background. Now. You have to say, okay, well, how can I put the habits in place in order to get me to the place I want? Like, what things do I have to change? What fears do I have to overcome? What courageous actions do I have to take? So I want you to know that all of the, you know, like, the stuff I'm doing in my vlog, the stuff that I'm doing here on the podcast, these are all tools to help you cultivate that life. But that life is never going to be cultivated without you making the commitment to put these things and act in your life. And again, I'm using. When I say you, I'm also referring to me, myself, because this is a journey I've been on. I've been doing personal growth and development for I don't even know how long now. I mean, at least 10 years. And it's a road that I'm always on because I recognize that there's always more to discover in myself and that I want a lot from life. And the only way that I could ever get all the stuff that I want in life is by continue to push myself to grow, to take new actions, to reach for new things. And that is, that's what I want for you. So I hope by listening to this. Well, first that you'll go onto my website, www.donnyrouse.com if you see the website, you'll likely notice if you go to the about me, it's actually kind of funny. If you go to the about me, you'll see like, it'll be like, it'll have like a girl's image and it'll go into it. The reason why it is like that is because I used a template for my website and my whole thing is I like taking action. I take the action and then I correct. But once the action's taken, I know it's there. Now I know I have to continue to follow up and refine. So that's just how I work. Ignore that. But there's a sign up sheet there. Click in the sign up sheet. It'll put you on my list. Even though it's not again, like it's not complete, but the content is there. And you'll start to get an email from me. And if any learning is come out of that as well as this is just to take and prevent, just start. Don't worry about being perfect. Just put one foot in front of the other and take that first step. Of course, you may think that people are judging you, but who the freak cares? Who cares? This is your life. You are building it. A lot of people can't remember yesterday because there's so much information coming at you in any given day that it's like someone tells you something like, oh, did you tell me that was it last year? No, it was yesterday. Oh, okay. You know, so give yourself permission to just take that step and to take your time getting there because again, life is a journey, not a sprint. So I hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you have any questions with regard to refining or you know, figuring out your questions, refining them and creating that daily habit, you can send me a message through my website@donnyrous.com,-o-n n y r a u s dot com. You can't subscribe to the website. The podcast there yet, but you can always go to the Spotify, Apple, whoever the provider is that you listen through, and you can subscribe through the podcast there or maybe you're just watching on Facebook. That is all I got for you guys. I hope you enjoyed this podcast. I hope it in some way opened you up to the awareness that there's something going on in the background and that you have the power to change it and move it in the direction you want to go. So that is it. God bless you guys. Thank you so much for tuning in. I appreciate you putting your time and attention here to get some new awareness, some new tools to better your life. And I want you to always remember, you get one life. Live it. God bless and I will see you again soon.