Life After Death - How Death of a Loved One Is an Opportunity to Live Again

Most people spend their entire life stressed without ever giving a single thought as to what it is they really want or what's important to them. See, I'm here to cut through all that noise, connecting you to yourself and the life that you were meant to live. I used to slave away at a corporate job that I hated, but I broke through the social norms and pursued my passion. As a result, I own my own coffee company. I'm espresso sommelier, and I get to travel the world. You, too can live a life that you love, but it starts with getting clear about what you want. It starts with a new decision. I'm your host, Donnie Rouse, and you are listening to the podcast One Life, Life After Death. Have you ever had a loved one pass away? And in the flow of the grief that you're feeling, there's an opening? And then opening is you start to see life a little bit differently. You start to see what different roads are available to you and what else is possible. What I want you to do is to bring to mind that experience and to understand what it is that you're being told. When we have experiences like this, they are grieving, but they are a blessing in disguise as well, because they remind us that one, we all end up in that same destination. Death. Right? It's inevitable. None of us can escape it. But the blessing is that it reminds us, is that we're living now. This is the time we have. And the opening it allows us is to see what is true to us. What are those desires that we hold deep in our heart? So as I go through this story, I want you to reflect on maybe some losses you had or if you haven't lost anyone yet, imagine, well, if that were to happen, when you're faced with this, how would it impact you? How would you view life after that? Because life is a blessing and it is a gift. Every day that you're awake, the fact that you're listening to this is a gift. And when we choose to deny or ignore that, that's when suffering comes. That's when life just seems like, ugh. So my intention is to wake you up to life, to give you a little shake. Say, hey, remember, Remember life. You know, like, this is all happening for you, and you get to shape your experience of it. About a month ago, I was. Two of my friends, unfortunately, had their mother pass away. One of them, I didn't know, but one of my friends, I was very aware that his mother was sick and that she had passed. When I went to the wake, I was looking at, you know, I was looking at the experience of the wake and, like, how people were talking. It was kind of a social thing. One of my friends was like, well, I can't believe, you know, I'm not going to have a wake because people just talk. It's disrespectful. I said, well. I said, well, when I have a wake, I want it to be one giant party. I want to have, like, a video of, like, the life I lived. I want people to say, man, he really lived his life with passion and not to feel sorrowful, but to be inspired by how I lived. After the wake, I was driving home, and all of a sudden it's like this opening where I'm like, man, every day is a blessing. You can't take a single day for granted. And I started to think about all the things I wanted in my life, like the location I wanted to move, like Miami, Florida, the One Life program. Like, all the desires I have were flooding in. What happens shortly after that, right, you start to get into the way, like, the normal routine of life. You start to go back into those habits and especially the habitual ways of thinking. Not long after that, all of a sudden, all those insights and inspirations you have start to fade. I tell you this because it's important, because in those moments of inspiration, when they strike, you must take action. Lock into it some way. Take some action that's going to lock you in where there's no turning back. Like, if it's. I use the example of a triple op, because this is often how I travel. I'd book a trip, say I want to go to Thailand. And when I'm feeling inspired, usually it takes several spurts of inspiration. I'm talking to a friend. They're like, oh, my God, you should totally book it. I'm like, fuck, yeah, I'm going to book it. And then I go in and I lock it in. I'm like, oh, damn. I guess I'm going to Thailand. But then once I'm in that momentum, once I come back from that trip, all of a sudden I'm like, I only want to travel. The point I'm trying to make is that when you are in those states, those are your true. That's your true self. Those are the true desires coming forth. But if you don't take that action, if you don't lock it in and quote, unquote, burn the bridges, the very least you can do is literally just to capture what it is that you were feeling, like what the inspiration was what the event was, how did you feel? Like what were. Give it to some descriptors. So this way, when you're starting to reflect, when you maybe you journal at the end of the day, when you start to look at that now all of a sudden, like. Because when you're in that state, everything is very, very vivid, right? Like all of a sudden your senses are literally ablaze because now you're like, oh my God. Yeah, it'd be freaking amazing. You imagine having dumplings in Hong Kong. That's my next trip. But all these things are flooding your mind. And when you capture them and then you start to review them, you put yourself back in that state. But when you don't, it's lost for good. This past weekend, a customer of mine came by the booth. I asked her how she was, and usually my booth is the bright spot in her week. And it's funny because sometimes in the, in the routine of things, I would take things for granted, right? I would be very critical of myself and the routine, saying like, oh my, you know, I'm still doing the markets. I've been here for 13 years doing, doing these markets and feeling like there was, there was no growth. But after doing some reflection, I realized that not just in my family, but at the event, people come to see me because I am a bright spot in their day. And it made me look at my interactions differently. When she came by, she was telling me, I was like, well, hey, how are you? And she told me that like there were several deaths in her family and how she's just like, oh my gosh, you know, she's like, I can't even, I can't even feel like I can't even think about anything right now. She's like, you know, my daughter in law's father died and I think one of her relatives just died and an aunt or something just died. And she was just like, man, this sucks. And I said, I know how you feel. I mean, especially when you have three people that you're close to and you love pass away. And I reiterated what I had felt when my friend's mother had just passed. I said, you know, isn't it funny though, how when that happens, there's this little opening where all of a sudden now you start to become aware of your desires, you start to become aware of how you want to spend and live your life. And she goes, yeah, you know what? That is one of the benefits of it because you realize just how precious life is. So I made her promise me, I said, all Right, well, listen, I have one thing to do. I know you feel like you can't stick your head above ground right now, but after the next few days, because she said she had a few days of things she had to tidy up, like, you know, family affairs and then she would have a breather. I said, all right, fine, then just promise me this, Promise me that when you come back to me next week, that you would have done just one thing for yourself, just to feel good. And it's funny. She's like, well, I'll try. I'm like, no, no, no, don't try. If you don't do something for yourself, don't. No coffee for you. I was being like the coffee Nazi. But. And then it's even the more iron ironic thing about that was that when I was reflecting on it, I realized that I was that partner day, you know, that I was that break, that moment of like just being in the moment. But it's important for ourselves not just to do it one time, like, sure. Life. There's responsibilities in life that you. You've committed to or you can't get, you know, you can't get away from. That doesn't mean you can't plan these small things in your day to just be present and to enjoy being alive. It's so easy to plan all the shit that you have to all the demands of other people, but when it comes to doing something for yourself, you just kind of. You brush it aside. So in listening to this and in closing, what I want you to do is just to say, well, what would make my day just a little bit better? If you want to go even bigger than that, what would make your life a lot better? But what would make your day a little bit better? Start planning these things into your day before you do anything else. Right? Because your schedule is always going to get booked up with something that is going to demand your time. And usually it's from external sources that are causing the demand in your time. But before you even start your day, right, Maybe you don't even plan your day. I know sometimes I would feel really anxious about planning my day. But then I realized when I plan my day, all of a sudden there's a natural form. I don't get pulled in different directions. But think three things that you can do in your day just to give it to yourself, to feel good. Let that be the intention. And it doesn't have to be like an hour. It would be great if it was an hour, but it doesn't have to be an Hour. It could be literally three minutes just to stop and smell the coffee or the roses. Whatever you want to do, three times, you can do that. And you start to think of. Put intention on how you want to interact with your family and all the other things. But when death strikes, right, it's inevitable. We all are going to experience loss at some point of our lives. If you haven't yet, get ready. It's coming. I don't mean to scare you. It's just life. But I want you to pay attention to the opening that it allows, the gift that it brings you. I remember. I don't remember who was exactly that had passed. Oh, no, it was actually my nonna. And I thought about how she lived her life and the lessons I got from her life, the things that I could carry forward. It's so easy to say, oh, you know, they're not here anymore. Let me mourn, rather than say, you know what? Well, what were the blessings they. We all are limited to our time here. What were the blessings this person left on my life, the impact they left on my life? How did they shift and change my life and point it in a different direction, where I wouldn't have been had they not been there? Start to appreciate their time with you. And then when that opening comes, say, well, all right, well, what is it that I want for my life? What is it I want for this moment? What is it that I want for my relationships? What is it I want for my health? How do I want to wake up and feel every single day? Get aligned with that. And then if you're courageous enough, take an action. Take something that is going to lock it in. So this way, you have no other choice but to move forward, but to take a different action to get out of that square that so many people live in and we get stuck in. Even if you're completely conscious of your life, because it's our natural propensity to stay within the lines, right? Oh, this. It's scary. I don't want to go too far out of my comfort zone, but we all have to push beyond our comfort zone because that is where life is happening. So that is my intention for you. So I hope you enjoyed this podcast. I hope it in some way. At the very least, if you maybe it conjured up some old memories and losses that you have, and you're like, you know what? Yeah, I remember when my Blank passed away, I said that I was going to write a book. I said that I was going to relocate to a city that I love. I said that I was going to take that trip to look up my family tree and to learn more about my family history, whatever it may be. Hopefully it awoken some of those moments within you and inspired you to do and take an action. That's all I've got for you guys today. I hope you enjoyed this post. If you did, please hit that subscribe button. Share it with somebody who might be going through a difficult time because a lot of time when we're you can get caught in a hole and it's very hard to to peek your head above ground and to get a different perspective on it. And that's why no man is an island. You need people around you to help you, point you in the right direction, to make you realize, you know, hey, it's gonna be okay. You know, first of all, you got me and life goes on. Life is beautiful. Life is still enjoyable. We all need that reminder. So that is all I've got for you guys today. Again, if you haven't, you can subscribe, ask a question or a comment via my website@www.donnierouse.com. remember, you only get one life. Live it. God bless and I will see you again soon.