Living Contradiction

Hi guys, my name is Donnie Rouse and you're listening to the podcast One Life Living Contradiction. Do you often find yourself saying that you want one thing, but then if you look at the actions you're taking, you're actually walking in the opposite direction? That is what I mean by a contradiction. My life has this funny way of presenting a lesson to me and then reinforcing it several times over, not just in the life experience, but also in information towards that life lesson. Case in point, I'm reading the book Personality is Impermanent by Benjamin Hardy while also taking his course 30 Day Future Self, when I came across the module that was titled Contradictions and Where are we in Contradictions to the Future Selves that We Want? I kind of read it, I took it in, and then all of a sudden I watched a YouTube video that was just recommended. You know how YouTube says, you may like this video? So I watched that video and it spoke about the same thing. That same time I decided to pick up my gap analysis and to start working on that for the different categories or different aspects of my life. And there it was again. If you're not familiar with what a gap analysis is, I'll explain it now. So a gap analysis is pretty much looking at where you are and then where you want to be at some point in the future. And then the gap is subtracting the future from the present and say, okay, well, what has to happen here in order for me to be that future state, to be that future, to meet that future goal? In this particular exercise that I was doing, it was unique to other gap analysis that I've done in the sense that it asked two sets of questions, which was pretty much the same question over and like twice. But then there was a small twist in words and it was the syntax, this way of asking the same question once again that made it register different. Because as you answer the questions, as I'll explain to you now, you start to think differently. So when I was filling out this gap analysis, I said, okay, where am I presently? In this instance, I was doing my physical health. So I started writing down, well, I, you know, I have pretty good energy, I eat clean, I have pretty ripped abs and sculpted body, I feel pretty strong, although I'd like to be stronger. And I just kept writing down these things. The next question was, where do you want to be? When that question came down, I started thinking about, well, alright, well, what are the things I want to improve? I started looking, well, you know what? I'd like to have my chest A little bit more full out and like my body have a little bit more muscle. I'd like to have like a ripped midsection. I mean, I'm pretty lean now, but I want like really ripped. I like to have like energy to burn. Where I could go two hours playing sport or running a soccer field and still have energy. I want to have flexibility and range of motion in my hips. I want to be relieved of that pain in my back. I want to have perfect vision because my vision was starting to blur and I was wearing reader glasses. So that's when the question was asked again. Where are you now? Be honest. Those were like the key words that were put into the sentence. Having just answered that future self now, I was made aware of those, like those soft spoil, like the soft points, like the things that were sore for me. Then I said, okay, I'm writing it down and being honest with myself, you know. Yeah, my hips have been stiff. Well, if I'm going to be honest with myself, why are they stiff? You know what, I sit at the computer for hours at a time. I don't get up and stretch, I don't move. So of course they're going to be stiff. How about when I go to the gym, I'll have a leg workout or even when I'm doing any body part. The stretching before and after is one of the most important things of working out. And yet I'm like, you know what, I don't have the time. And I would just skip it and I'd walk out of the gym. When it came to my eyesight, I was going, yeah, my eyes have been blurry. I really don't want to wear these glasses. But if I'm honest with myself, how have I been complicit in that? Well, you know, I would spend hours at a time looking at my computer screen. I would spend a couple hours just kind of going through social media stuff that doesn't add anything to my life, but only takes away time and then going back to sleep or I want more energy. Well, how do you get more energy? You eat well and you sleep well too. You get rested sleep. I wasn't getting rested sleep. I would be doing work at night sitting at my computer. And blue light is horrible when you're trying to sleep. And as a result of doing the work at night, I'd usually go to sleep at around 12 o' clock and then I would try ringing my alarm at five o' clock in the morning trying to get five hours of sleep and then do another full day. It didn't work. Didn't work at all. Even just saying it now just sounds stupid. But what I'm trying to get here is that sometimes where you're in contradiction may not be apparent to you until you actually write it down and put it on paper. Because, like me, I was just kind of going around trying to do, like, trying to put out the fires, trying to make those small movements forward in my goals. But as a result of doing that, everything else was kind of falling off. Like, I wasn't doing my meal prep. So you can't build muscle if you're not giving your body the raw material to build the muscle and all these other things. I'll tell you what happened. As a result of writing down where I was contradicting myself, I saw everything as just a habit. Now, there had been times where I'd gone to sleep early. There have been times where I had done my food prep and had a full schedule on top of it. There had been times where I would take breaks in the middle of my day and would go for a walk, then come back and be even more productive. But those seemed to have gone by the wayside because I was just in survival mode. And I would not have been able to see that unless I was asked to write down where I was contradicting myself and to put that microscope on my days and my life, to say, okay, wow, this is why I don't have that. Let me change it. Now that I've done this exercise, now it's a matter of structuring it and making it work for me and fine tuning it, which is. It's pretty awesome. Around the health aspect of it, it's easy because I've done it before with the physique contest that I entered. I just got to go back to that and allow myself the time. So what is it for you? I just told you about the personal aspect, like my personal health. But what is it in your relationships with your family? What is it in your relationship with your significant other? What is it for your emotional health? And how about your finances? Maybe you go on shopping sprees all the time, but you don't have the money to pay the rent. Whatever it is, the important thing is not to beat yourself up over it, because awareness is the first key, because as you become more aware of it, then you start to be able to change, because you can't change something you're not aware of. So where do you contradict yourself? And when you see that, how can you set yourself up to win? So you're not doing that. Maybe it's replacing a habit with like or you know, or triggering yourself with something else. One of the things that I'll give you a tool that I use and it pretty much goes with your physiology is attached is like your emotion and physiology. Kind of go one and one and when you, whenever I'm feeling a certain way or I catch myself, want to do something like say it's like eating or going on social media when I know I shouldn't be, I get up and I walk out of the room or I'll do something to change my physiology as a result of that two, that maybe one minute switch change in my personality, my physiology. I don't go back to that state of wanting to check my, my social media or do something else. It's changed because I changed my body. And I mean that's a completely different topic in and of itself. But what do you want if I'm going to leave you this is your homework for today. What is it that you want? Where are you now? And be brutally honest with yourself. Not to beat yourself up, but just to be honest. This way you know what path you have to take to move forward. And after you've looked at what you want and you're honest at where you're starting presently, go throughout the rest of your day today and start to look for those contradictions. Always saying if you wanted to really get granule about it, before you do anything, if it's maybe with your personal health, before you put a bite of food in your mouth, ask yourself, say, okay, is this getting me closer or further away from my goal? And evaluate it. Doing that simple task is going to make you think of, okay, you're going to picture in your mind this image of health that you desire. And then it's going to picture the exact opposite of what you'll be going towards by indulging in that donut or soda or whatever it is. And when you're faced with that decision, what do you think you're going to choose? Put enough focus there. I promise you're going to choose the healthier image. That is it. Guys, I hope you enjoyed this episode. If you did, please take a screenshot, share it on your social media, Invite your friends and family to check out the One Life podcast with Donny Rouse. If you haven't already, I ask you to please leave a review on Apple Podcasts. Tell me what you love about the podcast, how it's helped you, and lastly, if you have any comments or questions, feel free to message me personally via Instagram at D o n n y R A U s Again, D o n n y R A U s. Thank you guys so much for tuning in. God bless, and I'll see you next week.