People Experience

Hi, guys. My name is Donny Rouse, and you're listening to the podcast One Life People Experience. If I asked you, what is the one thing that shapes your experience, how would you answer it? I think how I would have answered it in the past. I would have looked to a particular experience. I had, maybe one while I was traveling, and I would look to the experience and say, wow, you know, that was an amazing experience. And then when I would think about that experience, I would think about what actually transpired. Like, maybe one of my most recent experiences was going to Turkey and taking the hot air balloon up in Cappadocia. But when I looked into the question a little bit more, I realized that there was something that I was overlooking, and it was people. People are what make your experience. I was talking with a friend. I was supposed to be in Spain this past week. One of my best friends, my friend Lucas, was having his bachelor party. So a group of his friends went to Mallorca and they celebrated his bachelor party. Unable to go. I was looking through the pictures that they were posting on the chat, and I was saying to myself, well, they just kind of look like just ordinary pictures. They didn't look like they were doing anything out of the ordinary. They did dinner. They went to a bar one night, and then they went paintballing. On another occasion, as I was looking at this, I was like, well, maybe. Maybe I didn't miss that much. But then it clicked. I thought about all the times I had spent traveling, you know, all around the world, and how the things that I did, the things that I remember most, weren't like, these extraordinary activities that I did, but rather they were, like, the basic things, Maybe going to a cafe and sitting down for three hours and having a coffee and a great conversation with someone I just met. And as I kind of zoomed out and I said, well, it's really not the experience at all, but rather the people that you're with that make the experience. Going back to my friend Lucas, I mean, case in point, he was the perfect example of this. We've taken. We've probably. I met him in Rome, Italy, and that was back in 2006. And since we became friends, we've probably met up on maybe five different occasions, like in Spain as well as in the United States. And regardless of whatever we were doing, as long as we were together, we always found a way to have a good time. And even in, like, the most mundane of experiences, they stuck out in my time in my mind as being, like, one of the most memorable moments I mean, one of the memories. That stinks my mind. We were in New York City one evening, and we went to Grace Papaya to get, like, a hot dog. And he's one of those friends where literally, you could lock us in a blank room with nothing but white walls, and we would find a way to enjoy ourselves. We would find a way to laugh. So that's when it clicked. I mean, it made me realize, well, yeah, a picture. But the experience of being around these people with common interests, common personalities, I mean, that's what makes the experience. It's also having a new experience. It's so easy to kind of get stuck in, like, a comfort zone, get stuck in a safety where you don't really step outside, you don't try new things, you don't meet new people. One of the reasons why I like traveling so much is because it forces you to do both of those things. When you're in a new land, you're kind of forced to have new experiences because everything around you is different. And as a result, you have to engage with different people because you don't know anybody around you unless you're traveling with someone that is. All right, let's. Let's rewind. Let's backtrack. So say you go on experience and, like, you know what? You don't really speak with anybody, right? Let's say I did this Cappadocia experience. I took the hot air balloon up, and I'm like, wow, that was an amazing experience. But I didn't really talk to anyone in the carriage or in, like, the basket. People still make that experience because it takes, like, an orchestra. It takes people to actually plan and put that experience in place. Right. If it not had been for the guy, the hostile, who connected me with the hot air balloon operator and the hot air balloon operator who took us up there. I mean, it takes a bunch of people to coordinate and to make these experiences happen. So again, it goes back to people. One of the things that kind of, like, kind of bugs me sometimes, too, but I realize it's more of a habit that a lot of people are in, and I'm guilty of it as well sometimes. So I'm not, you know, I'm not throwing any stones is that you'll be out with a friend or maybe on a date, and you think you're having a great time, and then all of a sudden, the person picks up their phone and they start texting or they got a new. Like, on one of their dating apps, or they got a new message on Facebook or whatever it may be, they pick up the phone and they start literally swiping through and seeing what people said. And the reason why it bothers me, because whenever we take in. And I say we because, like, I'm guilty of that at times as well, but I'm very, very conscious of it whenever we engage with our phone, when we're with someone special. What you're saying is what's happening right here is more important than you literally. Right. Because what really goes on if you, let's say 99% of the communication that comes on your phone is practically worthless. Right? A new like on your Instagram photo. Ooh. You know, a new, like on your hinge app or whatever, dating app you use, whatever it is. 99% of the stuff that comes through these phones are demands being made on us and things that could wait, that don't require our immediate attention, but yet we give it our immediate attention. As a result, we rob ourselves of the connection in that moment, the connection to that other person. So the intention of this podcast is for you to one, realize that what's going to make you feel fulfilled is going to be based around your relationships, around the people you meet, and then secondly, the realization that, like, there's always people involved and also to encourage you to go out and have new experiences. I used to reserve these experiences for only when I traveled. When I was home, I would never really go out, never really would do anything. I would literally just work until it became time to travel again, and then I would fly out somewhere, and then I would have my great experiences, come back, and then kind of like sit down, face down and do work and not engage with anybody. It sucked because I was missing that emotional juice. And then what I started doing was like, you know what? Let me go out with friends, let me meet someone for coffee, let me go have a drink at night. When I'm traveling, I will engage in alcohol a little bit more than when I'm here. I'm usually very rigid with my workout routines and everything else, but nevertheless, I do enjoy that occasional beverage and. And it's nice to go out and engage. So I, as a result of realizing, you know, the differences between how I was acting when I was having these great experiences and how I was when I was back home, they made me realize that there was a difference in my behaviors as well as a difference in the feelings that I had in life. It's all about feelings. It's all about feelings. And every new interaction that you have, every new experience is a Chance to meet someone new. And you know, because otherwise you feel like your world is shrinking. You feel like the world around you is small. When you don't step out to see something different, you think that, like the four walls of your room, well, that's all there is. Or your city, that's all there is. And it's so easy to get blinded. But the moment you step out, the moment you try something new, you have new experience, and you start to expand your world again. Going back to travel, that's one of the biggest reasons why I love traveling so much, is that it opens my eyes to the world around me. It makes me see beyond sometimes this limited scope that I'm seeing. So let's bring it all back together again. The point of this podcast is I want you to realize just how important people are to every experience you have in life. And if we think about, like, some of the recent experiences we have are these. These peak experiences, I'm willing to bet probably 100% of the time there was a person involved that made this experience what it was. It could be someone that you met, or it could be someone who helped curate that experience. Right? Like the. Like the hot air balloon operator, right? There's no way. If I can't fly hot air balloon, if I didn't have him there, there's no way I would have experienced that. So let's do that. Take out your notebook or make a mental note. What is one of the most recent experiences you have? Peak experiences, meaning an experience that you know, that you'll remember for the rest of your life after you've chosen that what was involved in this experience? Who was involved? I want you to kind of get, like, a mental image of the people that were involved in the experience and how are people necessary in this experience coming to fruition? And then lastly, let's look at an action. Maybe something that you've been putting off, right? Maybe you've been putting something off because you were, you know, you're afraid. Some people, you know, people get afraid of, like, meeting new people, right? Because you don't know how someone's gonna respond. You may have this, like, that you want to engage with somebody, Someone else is in their own funk, and all of a sudden they respond negatively to you, and you're like, all right, well, I'm just not gonna communicate with anybody anymore. What is experience that you've been putting off? And I want you to just kind of think of that experience and think of the reasons why. And if you're courageous enough to do it. I want to take action on that experience. Take action and engage with people. What I found in my own experiences is that the energy that I bring is usually what I get back. Sometimes I'm wide open and I could talk with someone who looks like they're in the pissy of mood, but because I'm such a good mood, like my good move, I feel like overpowers them and then all suddenly change their mood and they get in a better mood and all of a sudden we're good friends now. There's also been the times where I tried to engage with somebody and they're just. They are not having it, in which case I move on. But I've also been in the spot where, you know, like, where maybe there was a strong reaction and it kind of like, you know, made me kind of shrink down a little bit. Like, okay, I will be quiet and not talk to anybody, but I encourage you to go out, engage, interact with life. So that is all I've got for this episode. Guys, I hope you enjoyed if you did. Please give it a share, give it a review a like, whatever you want to do. And if you have any questions, you can send me some questions via Instagram onnydon Y R A U s again D O N N Y R A U S God bless and I will see you again next week.