Shitty Year Reversal - Live Now, Die Later

Most people spend their entire life stressed without ever giving a single thought as to what it is they really want or what's important to them. See, I'm here to cut through all that noise, connecting you to yourself and the life that you were meant to live. I used to slave away at a corporate job that I hated, but I broke through the social norms and pursued my passion. As a result, I own my own coffee company. I'm espresso sommelier, and I get to travel the world. You, too, can live a life that you love, but it starts with getting clear about what you want. It starts with a new decision. I'm your host, Donnie Rouse. You are listening to the podcast One Life. So this one is called a shitty year Reversal. What if I told you that you can reverse a shitty year? You probably think I was lying, right? The truth is that each and every one of us can reverse a shitty year or a shitty event or shitty anything. And what I'm about to tell you, you've probably heard me mention on other podcast episodes, but it all starts with the story. The story is the narrative of your life, the narrative of your day. And it kind of controls. It puts you in this hypnotic state to say, all right, well, what does this mean? And as a result, you tell yourself a story, and you start to see life through this story, through this lens. From probably this past November, I was telling myself a really shitty story. This year had been one of the most, hardest, most difficult times that I had. Well, parts of the year had been the most difficult that I've had in my life. And I'll tell you a little bit about it. I had. My father had gone in for a surgery for his heart. I had kind of like a fallout with a friend. When I was in Covid, I was indoors, so it was just like seclusion. And when all this heart stuff was going on at the same time. So I had been indoors, literally for months without really going out and seeing friends and seeing anybody. So all that stuff was pretty hard. It was just a unique point in my life that I could remember. But those points in our life, the points where we feel like we're in that dip, those are the big points of growth. Because it's always something that when we go down, we dip. Those are always the areas where you start to look for new answers. You start to say, okay, this does not feel comfortable. I've got to do something. And then as a result, you start to take different actions than you were doing prior to that, because prior to that, you were Just stuck in this habitual pattern of doing the day to day because things were okay. They weren't bad, they weren't good, but you know what? They were okay. So you just kept going. What I did was I looked at everything. I was like, man, something's got to give. And then I tuned into my story. I tuned in. Every time I would speak with someone, I'd be like, man, you know what? This is one of the most difficult years ever. This is one of the most difficult years ever. This is the most difficult year ever. I kept saying it over and over again. And what kind of effect do you think if you think. Let's pause for a second. If you're telling somebody, this is the most difficult year ever, what kind of feelings does that put in your body when you're in that state? What do you think is going to come? Or what do you think you're going to get more of? I'll give you a hint. It's not good stuff. Because when things are shitty, things tend to stay shitty until you have a shift. When I became, well, I've been conscious. But when I actually took the time to say, you know what? Let me tune into my story. Let me see what am I saying here? Because I know story and state everything, they all go together. What's the story? I'm saying. I'm saying that this is the hardest year ever. Is that true? Yes, it was very difficult, right? You know, the fear of losing one of your parents. You know, then there's other things. Like I'd moved back. I'd moved back home and I'd stayed here a little longer. So now I'm looking at getting my own place again. So all these things, there's a 50, 50. There's 50, 50 to everything, right? You could choose that. You take an event, you can say, yeah, it was a bad event, or you can say, yeah, it was a good event. There's a 50, 50 chance there. It's a flip of a coin. It's all what you choose to focus on. So when I became aware or more. When I was paying more attention to the vocal patterns I was using, I said, all right, well, how is that gonna make me feel? This is the toughest year ever or most difficult year. Let me change. Then I started saying. I was like, you know what? This is the biggest growth spurt that I've had in a while. This year I experienced massive growth. Is that true? I will tell you 100% it is true. And it is all the result of those challenging times. That I had this past year. I'll rattle off a few. I was talking with somebody and we were talking about my espresso that I make. I had mentioned some stuff that I probably shouldn't have mentioned, and he's like, oh, about products and stuff that I was going to come out with. And they were like, oh, you mind if I take that? And I was like, wait, what? Excuse me. And then all of a sudden, I shifted gears and I started acquiring equipment to increase my production capacity. Things that I had been hemming and hawing about for years. But all of a sudden, in an instant, I just snapped my finger. If you heard that, in an instant, that started to move forward. One of my friends where we had a fallout, and when I look back, I felt kind of hurt. But when I look back at it, the energy wasn't there anyways. I didn't feel good around him. So what's the point? What is the. Why was I holding on? Right. We tend to hold on to things that don't serve us any longer, and what they do is they keep us stuck in that place that we don't want to be. Then fast forward like all, you know, the COVID and realizing Covid made me realize, well, how important is each interaction that I have with everybody? I was thinking about when I was in Covid and I had. I was in, you know, quarantining for like 10 days. I was just like, the things I thought about. I thought about how thankful I am to be alive. I thought about my customers, the interactions I have with people when I go to stores and I drop off a case of cold roman and I have a small chat with them. I thought about small moments like that that made me realize these are the moments that I enjoy. This is what it's all about. Then I also had a couple great trips. I went to Turkey. I was in Miami at the beginning of the year. And then I went to Puerto Rico and I went to Turkey. And the friends I made. I mean, I made friends. I made more friends this year that I consider to be close friends than I have, I think, in any year in my life. So all these things are stacking on, stacking on, stacking on. And then fast forward towards the end of the year, I took a business course that made me realize how important proximity is to the people, how other those people you're around, their goals influence your goals and realizing how you can make a difference. Like, you know, when you have a group of people together, you can make a difference in one person's Life. I donated $500 to save a girl from sex trafficking. I mean, you don't think, oh, $500. What is $500 gonna do? But it can do a huge difference. And then just the art of, like, giving and feeling, like, how good it feels to give, but something, you know, so often we can get into these restricted modes where we're afraid to spend money, we're afraid to do other things, and all that does is it cuts off the flow of energy, it cuts off the flow of life. So when I look back on all and I did not even touch about my father, it made me realize one, how important and how valuable time is. We hold these feelings in because we think we have forever and that things are never going to change. But life is always moving on. Life is always changing, right? We get older. I know I'm not gonna have my father forever. And, you know, there was just like, this feeling to, like, talk and, like, tell him how I really felt. I love him. He's the most important person in my life. You know, all these things, right? I could look back at it and look at the hard times and be like, yeah, it was a fucking shitty year. But then when I reframe it and I say, this is one of the greatest growth years I've ever had, it changes the way I looked at the year, and it changes how I look at the future going forward. Because the truth is that it was one of the most significant growth years of my life, putting me on a different projectory than I would have been had I not gone through that. So what is it for you? The reason why I'm telling you this is there's an intention behind it. And the intention is for you to look at what's going on in your life, for you to be conscious of your own language. What do you tell yourself every day? Tune in, because I promise you, that is what's giving you the experience that you're having. So what is it that you're feeling right? What do you hear yourself saying day in and day out when you're on the phone talking with a friend or when you meet a friend out for coffee? What is it that you're saying? You're saying your significant other is such an ass. Whatever, anything. Maybe pick one. There's many stories we tell in a day. Pick one. And then say, well, believing in the story, how would that affect my life? How would that. Is it going to affect the way I feel? And then flip it, say, or, well, what's a more empowering story? That's going to let me feel good. So if it was a significant other that you've been having a hard time with and I'm just throwing something out there, maybe there was infidelity, realizing maybe that the other side of the story is wow, you know what? I realize my self worth. I realize that I am worthy to be happy and I deserve someone who loves me and respects me. Maybe that's your new story. It's very different than My significant other's an asshole. It makes you feel a lot better, right? Because now it's all about you're bringing the power back into yourself and then just let that sit with that for a while, let it simmer. And I promise it's going to change the way you feel about your year, your day, your relationships, everything. I'm going to do another post right after this, so if you're watching it live as I'm streaming this, then awesome. And you're in for it's a little bit more Donny Candy and if not, it'll probably post sometime after this anyways and it's going to be based on just living life, living life to the fullest and not putting it off for some future moment. So that is all I've got for you guys today. I hope you enjoyed this episode. Thank you. God bless you. Thank you so, so much for tuning in. I realized you could put your attention anywhere. There's so many things vying for your attention and you chose to spend it with me and I hope that it empowered and enriched your day in some way and made you just shift the way you think about life slightly because it takes a compounding effect. You have to listen to things that are going to enrich your life for it to change. So I thank you so much for listening to this and if you haven't already, please subscribe to the podcast so this way you don't miss a single episode. You can do so by going to donnyrous.com, d o n n y r a u s.com there you can also send me a message. You can ask any questions. You could sign up for one of my coffee date workshops, which we have one coming up on the 29th. Depending on when you're listening to this on, we call it Dream Awakening. And then lastly you can purchase some awesome Rouse coffee, which is the coffee that I make. And the whole intention of that coffee is to connect you with your moment. That is all I got for you guys today. God bless. Thank you so much and I will see you again soon.