Where You Want To Be

Hi, guys. My name is Donny Rouse, and you are listening to the podcast One Life. Where you want to be, where you are now and where you want to be, there's a gap in between there and that gap. That crevasse is what we must cross in order to get to that holy land, that happy place. But before we can get to that happy place, it's going to require us to get uncomfortable. And uncomfortable means changing our habitual habits, changing the patterns of everyday living that we've been doing for sometimes our entire lives. And that is one of the most challenging things that people have to have to get past, right? Because once we have a habit of doing it, the mind has made that part of the body. And now all of a sudden, whenever we try to change, the mind acts up and say, whoa, wait, what are you. Whoa, hold on. What are you doing here? That's not how we operate. We normally do this and you're trying to do that. No, no, let's come back. Otherwise I'm going to get loud in here and you're not going to be able to distinguish what you're even thinking. And we have to be careful of the habits we take on, especially in this past year of COVID because as a result of getting into these routines and habits, we're ingraining them and sometimes they're not really serving us. So just from being indoors, you might not have control of whether or not you could leave your house, but that habit. So that habit now is making you kind of bunker down and not feel comfortable stepping outside of that comfort zone. And that comfort zone could be international travel. A comfort zone could be driving to the next town. That comfort zone could be going to the food store. So how do we break it? By the end of this podcast, I want you to be able to understand that by setting new routines, by taking that step by step by step, we could set ourselves up for success and we could start to experience the fullness of life again. If you haven't been doing it before, but at the very least, it'll get you until. It'll hopefully make you think about life differently. So this way you can start to do the things that you know are going to bring you joy and have those. Those fulfilling desires. These emotions. I'd given the story on one of my last posts. I was talking about my first flight during COVID I booked a flight to Miami because I'm be honest with you, I'm not really fond of winter because when it's cold, my joints start to feel it. And the dryness in my nasal cavity. It's not my favorite season. If I got out maybe a little more, did some skiing and stuff like that, probably enjoy a little bit more, but I don't. So I decided to retreat south. So going to Miami, Florida, this was going to be my first flight in over a year. So you can imagine with everything that's going on, with all the sensation in the news, you can imagine the thoughts that would go through one's head about whether or not it's safe. Especially with, like, the whole thing with the Boeing jets. I'm like, oh, my God, I hope I'm not going on a 737 Max or the 777, which is. Which had, like, the engine exploded or something like that. So all these thoughts were going through my head as I'm about to get on the plane. I get on the plane, and everyone's masked up. And there's one guy who's behind me who keeps taking off his mask and, like, putting it back on, taking off his mask. And then he would even start, like, coughing. So you can imagine everyone in the plane is like, what is going on here? Everyone's tensed up. And as the flight attendant comes over to the gentleman and says, hey, you have to put on your mask. We're all doing this. You have to do that. And the guy continues to tell the flight attendant, he's like, I can't breathe in this thing. I'm like, oh, great. This guy has Covid. And so he obliges to put it on the plane, takes off, and then he starts taking it off again. You could sense that there's this tenseness on the plane, and at least there was a tenseness in me. And so the plane lands. He ends up getting taken off before everyone else. He gets escorted off by some cops or something like that. And then we go about our day following that. I end up going. I stayed in that trip. I stayed in Miami for a week and a half, and then I flew back home. The feelings of flying the second time were nowhere near the first. There was a lot more ease, a lot more flow. I wasn't paranoid about getting on a plane. Now I got back to New York, I signed the sheets, and I was like, all right, well, this is. I feel like, you know, this kind of feels weird, having to check in, find the form and whatever. So I go back home. I'm there for a month, and then I go back to Miami again. The flight gets even easier to do. I don't even think twice about anything. I get on now instead of the N95 that I could barely breathe in, I just have like this little blue. This little blue mask that, like, the surgeons wear. I go down there. I'm in Miami for a month and a half or something like that. I don't even know. I lost track of time. And while I'm in Miami, a friend and I, we. We inspired the idea of going to Puerto Rico because we wanted to just kind of get out of Miami, have a break. So we fly over to Puerto Rico, booking it on a whim, and then stayed there, traveling all around the country. And then I fly back to Miami before going to Palm beach and heading back to. Back to New York again. So why do I tell you all this? I tell you all this because of. I want you to take away what I did. So I got on the plane. At first I started tense, but the thought process in my mind was that if I don't start flying soon, I am going to get less and less comfortable getting on a plane. And this is coming from someone who has. I don't even know. I think the year before, I was probably on like 15 flights, and I've traveled to more than 40 countries. I am very used to being up there. I'm very comfortable with flying and being in airports. But this was starting to make me feel a little discomfort, like a little discomfort in it. So I knew if I didn't get on the plane, I didn't break that habit, that it was going to become more ingrained. I would be more fearful than trying to get on the plane. It was going to be more. The feelings were going to be that much more intense. So I went down to Florida, and as a result of doing those multiple trips, now it's easy. Now I can get on a plane without even thinking about it. Now I can go to another country without even thinking about, oh, my God, over worrying is whether or not I'm going to contract something or if it's going to be safe. That is what I wanted to share with you because that is the step you're going to have to take. You're gonna have to figure out, okay, well, this is where I want to go. Let's get real. Where are we now? Right. Right now you might have this aspiration to go to. I always use Rome, Italy as an example because there's so many beautiful things about Rome. The pasta, the coffee, seeing all the history in the city. Right. You might have these aspirations of going to Rome, but where are you in reality? Maybe with all this that trip that seems like it was very likely now all of a sudden doesn't seem. It seems a little bit. Because now there's a lot of fears getting in the way. And get real with yourself. Where are you on that comfort zone? Maybe you're not that comfortable anymore, but in order for you to get from here to there, what has to happen? What are the steps that are going to take you there? It's all just a new set of habits, a new set, a new way of thinking that's going to get you from A to B. And that's how it is with our entire lives. If you're not where you are financially, it's a matter of doing a new set of patterns, a new set of habits. Because everything you've done up until now is the reason why you are where you are, the reason why you haven't left your hometown in your entire life, the reason why you don't have any savings. Whatever it is, it's all because of the habits. It's all because the actions you've taken up to this point. But here's the beautiful thing about life is that everything can change if you decide to take a new to ingrain a new set of habits, you start taking new action. So what, let's say, what is it that you want to experience this year? Because I'm going to bring it back to experience. We could talk about finance, we could talk about relationships, we could talk about anything. But let's talk about experience. Because I believe that life is meant to be experienced. Life is meant to live. You're meant to live the most passionate expression of your life. For me, that means traveling to the entire world. I want to see all 230 countries or something like that. I want to love meeting people, communicating, experiencing different cultures, trying their coffee. These are some of the things that light me up. So for me to get there, for you to get from where you are to where you want to be, what is it? Let's pick trip. What's the trip you want to take that is outside of your comfort zone right now? And that maybe it seemed like a possibility before, but after this whole thing doesn't seem that likely, Right? And then next list. What are those things that are getting in the way? Is it meeting people? Is it finances? Is it the fear of getting on the plane? Is it the fear of being alone, traveling alone for the first time? Because, you know, you try to get friends to come onto the trip and everyone says they want to do it, but nobody commits if that's if you have a desire to travel the world, then get used to it. Because I at one point used to try getting friends. Come along. People would always ask me, hey, Donnie, I want to come on a trip with you. Where are you going next? I could book the trip. I'm very reluctant to do that because it's very much my own experience. But then there have been those times where I'm like, you know what? All right, fine, well, this is where I'm going here. Book the trip this day and let's go. Weeks, months go by and they still haven't booked a trip. And I was putting it off waiting for them. And I said, you know what? No more, no more. If you want to do it, you have to take the action. You have to do it yourself. You can't rely on other people to have the experience that you desire. So going back, all right, so what is it that you want? What is it that's getting in the way? What do you fear of and what are the small steps that you could put in place, the small actions that will get you to think deep differently about those things that are before were holding you back and start to act on those, start to put these little things in place, these new actions in place. So this way, when you get to that and when you have to take those actions, it become easier. So, guys, I hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you did, please send me a message. Share it on your social media. Share to anyone who wants to experience more of life, who wants to travel the world, but maybe they have something pulling them back. Like I said, maybe it's the money, maybe it is the meeting people abroad. Maybe it's just doing that first trip by themselves. Send them to me. You can send me a message via Instagram. Onnydony Rous R A U s again. D O N N Y R A U S and then lastly, what podcast would be complete without endorsing some dope coffee that gets you in that mood, puts you in the state of saying, this is the life I'm going to create and that is my company, rousecoffee. So visit rous r a u s coffee.com where you can pick any coffee. Use the discount code One life and you'll get a discount on your first order. My coffees are pretty amazing, if I may say so myself. And that's because I put so much time into selecting every coffee. I'm a Q grader, so I know how to distinguish quality. And then once they get the bean, I know how to open it up to unleash its full potential like I do with you guys. I hope you enjoyed this podcast. God bless and I will see you again soon.