Make More Money By Designing Your Life

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Welcome to the beyond your why podcast and today I've got a great guest for you. We're going to be talking about the why of challenge. Now, if you recall the why of challenge, these are people that do amazing and extraordinary things. These are people like Steve Jobs and Herb Kelleher and Richard Branson that build amazing companies and do things that others don't think are possible. And so today, we're going to dive deeper into that why, and you're going to see a great example of somebody with that why. Now, our guest today is Patty Farmer. Now, Patty believes that when entrepreneurs know their why, they can kick their box to the curb and create the lifestyle and the income they truly want. Now, how she does this is by helping them find their own voice and create limitless possibilities so they can quickly connect, collaborate, and convert their potential clients 24,7 to make a bigger impact in the world and bigger deposits to their bank account. Patti is an award winning marketing and media strategist. She's an international speaker, radio host, magazine publisher, event producer, and best selling author and built a network of over 100,000 connections. Patty believes we all have a message and her mission is to help them master, market, and monetize that message in a way that creates transformation for both them and their clients. Patti, welcome to beyond, you'd why podcast.

Oh, it's so great to be here, Gary. Thank you so much for having me. This is one of my favorite subjects.

Perfect. Well, hey Patty, why don't we do this just so that our listeners get to know you, tell us a little bit about your story.

Sure. So I think one of the big things about my story is that I come from a big family. However, I am the only entrepreneur in my family. So my family didn't quite really get my entrepreneur spiritual. And I come from a family of stay in the same job, you know, retire, stay in the same house, you know, that type of thing, which was totally different for me. And so as I grew up, I really realized that that wasn't the box I wanted to live in, really. Right. You know, I wanted something different and I thought differently. And so I went into marketing. And originally I owned a mortgage company. And then in 2008 I realized, we all know what happened in 2008, and in 2008 I really realized that the part of that I loved was the marketing. And so I decided that that's what I was going to do. So I moved to Dallas, Texas, from Las Vegas, where I'm from. I moved to Dallas, Texas, and I said, okay, this is what I'm going to do. But what's interesting about it, Gary, is that when I moved to Dallas, I didn't know anyone. And the first day I was there, I remember sitting down, waiting for my furniture to be delivered, and I'm thinking, oh, my gosh, here I am in this place, and I don't know anybody. What am I going to do? And I had a few minutes of a pity party there, and then I thought, patty, what are you doing? What are you thinking? You are in the people business, and you now live in a metroplex of millions of people. So I put my big girl panties on. I went to my refrigerator, I wrote 100,000 on my refrigerator. And when my husband came home, he said, what's the hundred thousand? And I said, I'm going to give myself one year, and I'm going to meet 100,000 people, and I'm going to make $100,000 doing it. And he said, well, that sounds like a great goal, but how are you going to do it? And I said, I'm going to do it by doing things differently. And I'm not going to listen to what anybody else does. I'm going to listen to myself. I know why I do what I do, and I'm just going to create a possibility of what I want. And so I did. And I did it in nine months, not a year.

Wow. So how did you get to the point where you could even write numbers like that? How do you think like that?

Well, I think for me, I mean, the hundred thousand dollars was really just a number because I needed a number. Right? You know, so it's really not about the number. And I always like to tell people not to get caught up in that. However, I really knew that for me, I wanted to have a change. I wanted to do something differently and not do everything that I had always done. And one of the things for me that I had noticed is I always like to question everything. Like, I like to question the status quo. It's like, why do we have to always do it that way? And I realized that a lot of people are like that, too. I. I have to tell you, Gary, that while we are in the space that we're in right now, I think a lot of times when people come to me like, oh, Patti, this is how somebody does it, and I want to do it like that I love their perception of their success, right? And he's. I love the way they do it, and I want to do that, too. Or, oh, I want to do this. And I really started realizing that people don't really think about what they want, what their why is. What they do is they look at the perception of success that somebody has and things that in order to have that, they have to do what they do. Which is why, for me, it really is about kicking that box to the curb. Like, I have to tell you, I hate the phrase, you know, that says think outside the box. Why does there need to be a box? Get rid of the box. Create possibility by getting rid of the box. So that's something really, really important to me. I don't have a box, and I really help my clients to not have a box either.

You know, that's an interesting thing, Patty, because people with your why see the world so differently. I mean, you don't see boxes, but most people. Most people limit themselves. Most people compare themselves to others. Most people see what somebody else is doing, and they try to do it just a little bit better. Let me do the same thing, but add a little twist to it. And I know people, you know, with your why of challenge, can't even fathom that for the listeners. Patty and I have met multiple times, and we've been in masterminds together, and I've had the opportunity to hear her speak, you know, personally with me and with others, and how she can get people to. To think differently and see things differently. And essentially what you do is help them imagine possibilities. Instead of focusing on a box, you help them imagine possibilities. But how do you go about doing that?

That's a great question, Gary. I think one of the things here is what we have to do is, of course, first you have to imagine it. That's where the why comes in, right? You have to imagine it. First you have to know why you have to imagine it. But then the thing that I think is the most important part, and this is the complex part part, right? Which is you have to define it. Like, how do you take that? And then in order to expand it, you have to define it. And I think that's really key, because if you don't do that, then what you're doing is you're limiting yourself to how somebody else has already achieved it. And in order to not do that, to add your voice, to make what differentiates you really what you bring to the table, really, honestly, to define it, that's the only way you're going to expand it and then becomes the fun part, which is designing it. And that's why I always like to say I love to help people design the lifestyle they want to live. See, that's kind of part of the why. What happens is a lot of time people want to design the paycheck they want to have. Right. You know, and I say, you know, sometimes people will have a business, whether it's brick and mortar business or they're an entrepreneur, right. And that business can still own them. I'm sure, you know, many people like I do, who. Who have a business, but that business owns them. And so what I like to say is you need to design the lifestyle you want to live and then build a business that supports the lifestyle, not the other way around. And I think that's the thing that people that have my kind of why. Right. Who have my why, I don't understand not doing it that way. And so I think that really my zone of genius, so to speak, is being able to help them dig into that, remove the box, really define that, and then design it, which is the fun part for me.

You know, every time we talk, you tell me about the things that you're doing. You're doing things that most people think are not possible, and you're constantly doing that. I mean, just from living in Italy for a month by yourself to all the different projects that you have going right now. It amazes me, and I always wonder, does it amaze you at the things, you know, where you were, say, three years ago to where you are now?

Oh, Gary, you just don't know. So I think that's kind of actually interesting in itself, because when I look back, I'm like, wow. And I think part of that is just saying yes, right. You know, that was something that was really important to me, and I'm a speaker now. Like, you know, when you read my bio and share some of the things I've done, I hadn't done any of those things before. I mean, I was making really good money, and I liked what I did, but I really hadn't found my purpose. I really hadn't found the why I was doing it, which was so important to me, because once you know, the why, the how and the what become easier. It really was for me is if somebody would have said to me then, oh, Patty, five years from now, you're going to be speaking, and you're going to work with speakers, and you're going to be traveling all over the world speaking, and you're going to write some books. And I don't even like to blog. Right. I was like, oh, no way. Right. You know, I wouldn't have got it. But once I didn't think about the thing thing, and I started thinking about the why and how and could imagine that. And once I started thinking about, well, what does that look like now? Those things just are like the next step to me. I don't think of it as, oh, I'm doing this. It's just the next natural progression step. But I do have to tell you, somebody had to help me to see it in the beginning. Right. That's why coaches have coaches. Right. And I didn't get it. But I would have to say that one of the biggest decisions for me was saying yes. Once I made that decision and said, okay, I am going to listen and look at my why, I am going to create possibilities, and the biggest possibility first has to be saying yes to opportunities. And that was the game changer that literally changed my business. You know, I've told you the story. It was a game changer in my business and in my life. And I don't think I'd be where I was today if that one single decision in the beginning changed everything for me.

So you went from kind of a traditional job or career in mortgage, in the mortgage world, I mean, what actually happened for you to what was your next step after being a mortgage banker? And then how did that lead to today?

Well, the next step was when everything happened in 2008 and the mortgage, you know, business kind of fell. Then it was moving to Dallas. Right. So that was the next big thing. But then in Dallas, you know, I mean, I could have opened a mortgage company there, but, you know, 2008 wasn't really the best time to be doing that. And that is what made me really ask myself, why do I do what I do? Because I was already starting to feel like there were parts of what I did that made me happy and parts of my business that, you know, when you think about what your day looks like and you look at your calendar, you know, sometimes there's parts of that day that you're like, oh, yes, because you're so excited about that. And then there's the things that sometimes you have to do, and I'm, like, not so excited about doing that. Right. And I just really made a decision and said, you know what? I want to spend 90% of my day doing the things that bring me joy. And I love to do now. You know, I'd love to be able to Say we do it 100% of the time. But, you know, and I know that there are always parts of our business that have to get done. We can't always do every single thing we want to do, but we can outsource those things, right? So I outsource those things. But the decision to live my life that way and to design that lifestyle for myself was really, really important. And. And of course, the opportunity that came was when I was asked to speak, and I was like, no way. I don't want to be a speaker. Like, it was just not something I ever wanted to do or even thought I could do, to be totally honest.

Hey, Patti, what were you asked to speak on?

Marketing, which was my topic, but I just really was asked to speak on it. And so I did. You know, I did. And in that moment afterwards, you know, 37 people. So that's kind of the story. The story is that I was asked to come and speak. I said I would do it because it was a friend, and she really needed me to help her out when somebody else got sick at the last minute. So, of course, now I'm serving. So that's really how I build my business. So I was like, okay, I'll do it. But when I did, and 37 people from that room hired me, I remember thinking to myself, okay, so here's a different way, right? That was challenging the status quo. That was a different way. And I was like, wow, where do you get the potential to do that? But it was making that decision and being open to that that led to the next week, somebody saying, oh, Patty, could you come to London? And could you deliver this speech on this? And was I prepared? No. Did I know the content? Yes. So saying, okay, I'll do it, stepping up and saying, yes. I wrote the speech on the way in the air, on the airplane. I was literally only in London for three days. Like, got there, slept, got up, gave that talk, you know, and came home the very next day. It was exhausting. But I got three other speaking engagements that were all international, and in one week of being a speaker, I became an international speaker, which changed the course of my life. But that decision opened up everything for me, because then the question to me became, well, Patty, if you remove the box and you don't think of what everybody else has done, and you don't think about, oh, well, what is this person done? And this person done? And you just think about, what's your voice? What are your talents? Why are you doing what you're doing? It became so Much easier. Like, knowing the why, the what and the how are easy. It's knowing the why first.

I couldn't have said it better. That's exactly what I believe. So just. And I can see a big part of your success has been your ability to just say yes.

Yeah, this is important. Just say yes.

Because that really. That led to the speaking, which led to the international, which led to the. To the business. And so now you have lots of speakers and authors that come to work with you to learn how to do what you did, and you help them kick their box to the curb. Is that right?

That's right. Kick that box to the curb.

You know, when we met that one day at the restaurant and discovered. And went through the process, my process of discovering your why, was it a surprise to you that you're wise to challenge the status quo and think outside the box?

Actually, it was a really big surprise. I knew that I did that. I mean, I knew that I challenged it because my whole life I've been hearing everybody say, patty, why do you always have to challenge what everybody else is doing? Like, you know, I mean, it was almost like it was a negative, right? You know, like, why do you always have to do it? And until you actually showed that to me, it made me realize, like, that's not a negative, that's a positive. Right? Why do we have to do everything the same way as everybody else? We're not the same people. We don't need to do it the same way. Right? And so to me, that was a game changer for me. An aha moment that really made me realize that something that I knew in my gut, but because my family, who didn't really understand me, again, going back to how I was an entrepreneur, and they weren't really, honestly, I stopped questioning that and started realizing that, you know what? I'm an entrepreneur. I have an entrepreneurial spirit, and I need to listen to that. And there are more than one way to get something done. So I just started saying, oh, and once you do it, it's really kind of funny. Once you know your why, then what happens is there's this voice inside that starts believing you. Because I'm going to tell you, when you find out your why, you'll realize that in your gut, you kind of knew it. You just didn't have the words for it. And then you're like, oh, you know, you finally know why you think like you do or do what you do, and you just kind of don't have all the pieces. Once you get that Then it just makes so much sense. And then everything else after that just kind of leads back to that, Right? It just kind of makes sense going forward. And I think that the biggest change for me was that it helped me to trust my instincts. You know, my gut was already telling me some of these things, but because everybody else was telling me not to listen to them intuitively, I just didn't know. But once I knew my why, it just totally made sense, and it gave me the ability to trust my gut and know that it was right. And it was right.

You know, you hit the nail on the head again there. Because really, what it boils down to is going from feeling to knowing, from having no words to really express who you are and what you believe, to having the words to be able to articulate that which gives you the confidence to say, you know what? I'm okay. I'm okay. I know. I thought maybe in my mind, maybe I was thinking, God, am I just a little weird? Am I a little strange? Why am I so different? But then that becomes a positive. I mean, that becomes the reason that you've had so much success. But you have the words.

Yeah, exactly. And I think that what happens is there are always people looking for that. So one of the things that I thought was fascinating about this why concept of yours is that there's more than one different one. Right. You know, and so finding which one you are really helped me to realize and recognize when I work with other people, in my relationships, with my children and with my husband. You know, I have six daughters, so believe me, you know, think about that. Six daughters, they're all different. But really knowing their why really helped me. Like, it really helped me to figuring out how I can really better serve them. Right? My children and my clients, too. And not only that, but, you know, sometimes how we receive things, right? You know, like, somebody can say this to you, but if they say it in a different way, you receive it better. Right? So now what it does is it helps you to be able to communicate in a way that's going to help them to be able to receive it better so they're more open to the possibility. And that has really helped my clients a lot, I think, is that I'm talking their language, I'm talking to them the way they need to hear it, so they're open to it. Because not everybody has the same why as me, right? If they did have the same why as me, right? They'd be able to see those possibilities for themselves. They wouldn't even really need me. The people that need me are the people who can't do that. But guess what, Gary, the people I hire, those are people who are whose. Why is things that I'm not too. And that's totally okay. And I think that that's a concept that people have that they think that they need to surround themselves with people that are just like them. And that was an eye opener for me, too. That made me realize that my business grew and my network grew and even personally being surrounded by people who were not the same why as me, it changed the whole conversation. The dynamic of the conversation was so totally different. And it also helped me to know who to go to for whatever situation. Right. You know, because sometimes you want validation, or sometimes what you're looking for is a different way, or sometimes you're like, oh, I need you to play devil's advocate, or I need you to do this, you automatically know who to talk to, Right? Who's the right person for that? And when you have a business like I do, where a lot of it is about helping people to collaborate on things, this has really helped me to help them to know who are good collaborative partners, who are good strategic partners for them. So for me, it really has made a big difference, not just to my bottom line, but to how I do business and how I do business more purposefully and passionately too, which I love.

That is awesome. That's awesome, Patty. So when you think about helping somebody to get outside their box, somebody helping them to develop their strategy, to define their strategy, to design their strategy, how important is it for them to know their why before you do that?

Oh, it's so important, first of all, because you can get them there faster, right? You know, if they know their why. Because I'm going to tell you, a lot of times when you're talking to somebody, you know, it doesn't matter what you do. When somebody hires you, like, you know, why are they hiring you? Like, right? And when they tell you, I can pretty much tell you, Gary, and I'm sure you're going to agree that there's probably a 90% or better chance that the reason isn't the reason they told you in the beginning, not because they're lying, but because they didn't realize it, because they don't know. Helping them to really understand their why. Now that I understand this whole concept, I ask better questions. I help them to get to the why faster. Once we know what that why is. Well, when I am helping them to create possibilities, when I am helping them to Imagine that. And to expand on it and to define it and to design it, we have to know what it is first. So knowing their why really helps me help them make more money, help them make more money faster. Help me know what is the best strategy for them. Help me how they should leverage it. You know, it helps me to not, you know, suggest something to them that clearly is not the way that they would need to do it right, so we can be more focused. And it's just made doing business so much different. And my clients love it too, because it's really kind of funny when they come back to me and they're like, you know, Patty, you just have this way of asking just the right questions that helped me realize things that I didn't even realize what it is that I really wanted to do. You know, if you talk to coaches or strategists like me, a lot of times what happens is people will hire you. And really you spend the first time in the beginning helping them to clarify what it is they really want. And I gotta tell you, before I discovered the why concept, before that, I would have to tell you a lot of times it took a lot longer than I wanted to to get to that. Not because of me, but because they didn't really know. Now I can help them get that right away. And now we can start focusing on what they really need me to help them so they can get what it is they really want. And that's really important to me.

You know, Patty, when I speak at different events around the country, and I'll. And I'll be talking with somebody, you know, more one on one, and I'll say, you know, when you know your why, what you do has more impact. And they'll say to me, yeah, you know, I agree with you. In fact, I know my why. And then I'll say, really well, what's your why? And they'll say, well, you know, I've got a couple, I have two little kids at home. And so that's why I have to. I'm doing this online business so that I can spend more time with my kids. Well, that's really important to have that kind of a reason. See, that's more of a short term reason. That's like a short term motivation for doing something the way they're doing it. And I'm sure that's kind of the answers that you used to get when you would talk with people about, hey, what's your why? They would say, you know, talk more in terms of the short term motivations. That they would have. So that's different than the why that we're talking about, which is, you know, why should I choose you? Or why do you do everything you do?

Exactly right. A lot of times it is that a lot of it is like, oh, I want, you know, my kids or I. I need more money to pay for their college, or they have, you know, gymnastics or sports. They think that one of the ones that's really big is I need to, you know, replace my job income. So I could just do this I'm passionate about, or sometimes it's that I need. My husband hates his job, and I really need for him to, you know, to replace his income, you know, whatever the situation is. And it is really important to realize that we're all. Not. Everybody has the same why we don't all do it for the same reasons. Right. Freedom for one person could be they want to travel the world. And for another person, freedom could be they just want to go to their children's soccer games. Right. I mean, it's not the same, but equally as important. Right. You know, it's whatever is important to them. So knowing that why, the big why, which is what you and I are talking about right now, really what it does is it affects the how you're going to get there. Right. You know, and so I believe that the thing that people are willing to pay the most money for is anything you can do to help them shorten their learning curve.

Right.

That's what it is. Right. It's always learning what not to do is just as important as what to do. But being able to do it quickly I think is really important. And so for somebody who really helps people with marketing plans and leverage and strategy, that's what we do. Right. Is strategy. Knowing their why and then being able to create those possibilities makes it so much easier to do the how and the what. And they get it. And that's what it is, too. Like, then they get it too. And I think the thing that's so exciting is when it lands with them, and all of a sudden they're like, oh, my gosh, I never really realized it, but that's exactly right. That is so rewarding to me to be able to really see not just transformation for them because, you know, we're not in the information business, we're in the transformation business. Right. But transformation for their clients as well. Because once they get it now, they're actually able to help other people. And I think that's just the bigger picture.

Yeah. When they can have A bigger impact when by them working with you, they have a bigger impact. They have a bigger bank account. And you know, you don't really want to discount the whole. One of the things I love that you say in your introduction is about making a bigger deposit in their bank. And how have you seen that as being something important to your clients?

Well, I think it's one of the most important in the sense that it's the driver a lot of times that help, that makes them take action, but it's short term action. Right. So it's like it's the driver that helps them to take action. It's not the thing that makes them sustain it though. Right. Because really they don't get. They don't know how to do it. Right. And because they don't know what their why is, they just know they want more money. Well, who could you talk to that in some way, shape or form doesn't want or need more money to do something they want to do. Buy a new car, I mean anything. Right. You know, buy Christmas presents by whatever, whatever it is. But that in itself won't sustain them. Knowing your why, like your real purpose, like in your gut, why you do what you do, that's the thing that will get you up every day. That's the thing that'll have you picking up the phone. That's the thing that keeps you motivated to really do what you want to do and will actually make you happy. And really, that's what it's all about, right?

That's exactly right. You're speaking my language for sure, Patty, and I love it. So let's change gears for a second and tell us a little bit about some of the things that you're working on and what's next for Patty.

Sure. So, you know, really, honestly, you always got to walk your own talk, right? So for me, even myself, sometimes I even amaze myself with the possibilities. Like sometimes even for me, I see them and I'm like, wow. Like I wouldn't have saw that. Right. But for me, when the opportunity came for me to invest with my daughter, we're in the process right now. We've purchased 10 acres of land on the Las Vegas strip where I'm from, and we're building a castle hotel. So it's. But it's going to have event venues and we're going to do events there. No casino. And I'm really excited about it. Because who knew five years ago that not only would I become a speaker, not only would I be working with speakers, not only Would I then end up doing my own events and then work with other speakers to do their events? That I would open up a place that has event venues in it? Like, that was. That was a big possibility. And so I love that. But then from there, when I went to Italy, we. You know, you mentioned earlier in the interview about me going to Italy. And I was there for a month when I was there and I looked around, that's part of my ancestry. And I was like, oh, it's so beautiful here. How could I do business here? Like, how could I be here more often? And I realized that the event that I do in New York City every year, that I have a lot of Europeans that come to that. And I was like, oh, Patty, we would love for you to do an event internationally. And. And literally that kept playing in my mind when I was in Positano and when I was in Venice, and I kept thinking, well, why couldn't I do that? So then I started thinking, oh, so then I started looking at venues there, and I found a villa, and I thought, oh, I could do retreats here. How fabulous would that be? And then I found myself saying, well, if I could build a castle, why can't I buy a villa? So now, in 2019, we're going to be doing a retreat in Italy. But those are, like, big things. But the little things, I mean, not everything is a big thing, but the little thing for me really is making the decision that I only want to work with people who really make me happy.

Right.

You know, really knowing my why has helped me to ask the right questions when somebody is interviewing me. Because, you know, and I know that when people interview you, you're interviewing them too. Right. To make sure you're a good fit. I only want to work with people who are a good fit for me now. Now I know how to ask the right questions. So when I work with people, it is fabulous. I'm happy, they're happy. It's really great. And I'm not. I don't have, you know, nightmare clients anymore. I don't have people that I think, why did I take them on as a client? Right. You know, because I know their why and I know my why, and that makes me so happy. And so. Yes. Has it put more money in my bank account? Yes. Has it helped me to make a bigger impact in the world? Absolutely. Am I doing things I never thought I would doing? Yes. Are there more possibilities and I have even more things on the radar? Absolutely. But I have to tell you, none of those things would have happened for me if I didn't know my why and if I wasn't able to go back every time an opportunity comes and be able to say, okay, Patty, so, you know, imagine that. Does that work? And how do you define that and how would you design that so that it makes you happy, so that it is your why, so it can be sustainable and then always comes back to, you know, what's the strategy for that? So for me, it has really helped me to have a, for lack of a better term, criteria to look for when making decisions. You know, I don't have to analyze and analyze and analyze now. Now I just go to my why. And it just helps me to be able to make decisions easier. You know what I'm going to say? This is a good example. So, you know, we've all heard that story of decision fatigue. You know, how people wear the same thing every day, same colors, because they don't want to make a decision. That cracks me up when I hear that all the time. But I have to tell you, you know why? Because you have so many things going on that you can't make a decision. If you know your why and then you have your how and your what, you won't have decision fatigue. It will become much easier for you. You won't have to wear black or gray all the time. Think in a world with no box and think of other colors. A colorful life designed the way you want to live it. That's what knowing your why does.

You know, Patti, one of the things that I know you give clients, because I've experienced this with you, is you give them confidence when they speak with you, because you're able to help them make decisions. You're able to help them, like you said, imagine it, define it, and then design it. But you take them through doing that to where they can actually make a decision to move. And once that happens, so you see the possibility, then you help them define it. And once it's defined, boy, then the designing and the doing is the fun part. But you give them confidence to be able to do that, because that's what they're looking for. Right? That's what the missing piece for them.

Absolutely. Because sometimes they can't see it. They can want it, but they can't see it for themselves. Like, they don't know how to get there. They don't know how to get from A to B. Right. So they're like, oh, I want that. And I'm trying to do it the way I see everybody else doing it. Right. That's the box again. They're trying to stay in the box. And even when they want to think outside the box, for lack of a better term, they're still going back and comparing the box. That's why kicking the box to the curb is important. Get rid of the box so you can define it, design it on your terms, the way you want to live. And so, yes, will I say that sometimes I have to see it for them before they do? Yes. But with knowing their why, once we do that, that helps them to see it. It's not just me telling them I have something to back it up. And then they start seeing the bigger picture and then they start seeing their purpose and then they start seeing it. And then really, honestly, because I have a marketing and media company, you know. Yes. Do I give them the strategy for that? Yes. Do I help them with an action plan and, and stuff like that? Of course. Just knowing it in itself is. I mean, you still have to do something with it, right. It's a lot easier to then be able to define it and be able to say, yes, this is what I want, and does it fit? And then just like, yes. So I think that that's really, really important. And it's important for them and important for me too.

Now you've been able to do all of this in five years, is that correct? When did you make the decision? Since 2008.

2008.

Because you've been able to create a marketing and media company, you've become an international speaker, you've created your own radio show, you've created your own magazine, you have big events at different cities all over the world. You've become a best selling author. Now you're building a castle in Las Vegas. All of this in how many years?

Six.

In six years. So a lifetime, a lifetime of work for most of us you've done in six years.

Yes. And I own that mortgage company and that marketing company. You know, I've owned the marketing company for 14 years, doing it when I was in Las Vegas too. It wasn't until 2008 that I really decided to change. Right. I made that change. And really it was six years ago, a little over six years ago, that really I discovered, you know, my why. I discovered my why. Then what I thought was my why, right? And I opened myself up to possibilities. So I was really learning that about myself. Once I really got the why and then the how and the what, you know, just three years ago, which was about. Right about the time that I met you, all of Some of them, some of those things were already happening for me. But the really, the thinking about building a castle or being able to, you know, those things were so big that I don't think I would have thought those for myself if I wasn't already open to imagining. Right. You know, question really is why not? Right. You know, when you know your why, it's like, why not? And so then it's just really like knowing your why. Then it's the how and the what, and it just really kind of makes sense now. Does that mean that everybody has to do everything that big? No, of course not. You know, and there's been, you know, smaller things in there too. Right. You know, I just think that that's part's really important. I think one of the things that are not as big as a castle and a villa and you know, and that kind of stuff, but I think one of the major things for me is just being able to have the freedom to work with the clients that I want to work. You know, the freedom to be able to travel. Right. I love to travel, and so that has always been something really important to me. But then the possibility of, oh, well, why don't you just do events in the places that you like to travel to? And then you could have, you know, spend one day or two days doing an event, then be able to stay for five days having fun. And so that was a possibility I hadn't thought of. And I was like, oh, now that's a major part of my business plan for me. And so having clients, I mean, you can have clients anywhere. I have clients all over the world that I talk to, that I help, that I work with. They don't have to be where I am. The possibilities now are just limitless, really.

You know, let me ask you a question on that. Because if I was a listener and hearing all of the things that you have been doing and are going to be doing, and I think what would come to my mind right away would be, how did you get over the fear? Because that's really what holds people back of getting outside of their box is the fear of the unknown, the fear of can I do it? The fear of just starting something and failing. How do you help people get over that fear?

I really love that question. Because I had a lot of fear. I had a wonderful family, don't get me wrong. But because, like I said, because they didn't understand the entrepreneur in me. I mean, my parents used to say to me a lot, I mean, they're both passed away now, but they did used to say things to me like, patty, don't you think you're going to be a little big for your britches? Or when's enough enough, Patty? You know, like, they didn't get it either. I think it's because what they didn't realize is that for every single thing you do isn't about you, it's who you serve. Right? Everything that we do, I always feel and have lived my life and my business by lead with contribution, compensation will follow. So it's always about coming from service first. So I think that's really important. So that has always been my mod. With that said, have I always been fearless? No fear. I got in my own way a lot. One of the biggest ones was that I had the biggest fear of how could I charge people when I'm helping them, right? But I had to. For me, I had to hire somebody to help me, right? I hired a coach. And so I think that one of the ways people do have fear, right? You know, and not only that, but I think not only do people have fear of failure, I think sometimes they have fear of success, too. Like, because they know their life's going to change if you succeed, too, right? So there's a fear of that. How will my life change if that happens, too? I think one of the things that somebody said to me once, that would probably be my best answer here is that somebody said to me once, you know what I love about you, Patti? I love that you help us think of the possibilities, but then you hold our hand and love us through the implementation process of that, and you see it for us even when we can't, and you believe in it so strongly that then we believe in it, too. And I think. I love that. That actually made me cry. Gets me kind of teary right now even thinking about it. I've heard versions of that over and over and over. But I think that is. It is important to have somebody who can be there for you and believe in you and be there through the whole thing. That's why I believe everybody should have, Coach. But I also think you have to believe in yourself. And I think the reason why people don't always believe in themselves is because there's nothing to back it up. We always want that data to back it up. And that's what the W does when you know your why. And that helps you. It's like a formula, right? So then it can't be wrong. It's like math. Guess what? Two plus two will always be four. I Don't care how you do it. It's math. It's always going to be the same answer. Two plus two will always equal four, right? Well, if you have a formula or a roadmap, and you know what? Wow. If I know my why and I'm open to possibilities and I do this, and I do this, this is what's going to happen. And it's true to me. Well, you know, maybe you'll be fearful, I'm sure. Right. You know, I mean, every one of those things. When I got on that plane, I was pretty scared when I stood in front of the room for the first time. Like, a lot of people don't know this, but I actually went in the bathroom and threw up. For the first 16 months that I became a speaker, I never got on the stage once that I didn't go throw up first every single time. But I did it anyway because I made the decision and I wanted to do it. So I have to tell you, yes, it's hard, and yes, you may be afraid, but if you trust the formula, if your why is strong enough, and if you know your why and you trust it and you find out the how and the what, you'll be less fearful because you have a plan.

That's awesome. That's awesome. Well, Patty, how can people get ahold of you? Well, first of all, who would. Who would you like to get ahold of you and how can they get ahold of you if they want to work with you?

Well, I love working with small business owners, entrepreneurs, and speakers. Those are my favorite people to work with. And they can get a hold of me by going to my website, which is Patty, Patty with a Y. Pattyfarmer.com all my social media is on there. I even have a tab on there for collaboration. If, you know, listening made you think of an idea, I have a place there for you to share that idea. And if you would like to get the magazine complimentary, you could go to pattyfarmer.com.

And get a copy of the magazine for free. Check it out. It'll help your business. Your business will thank you.

That is so awesome, Patty. Thank you so much for being here. You've motivated me in a few ways that I'm going to share with you after we get off the podcast. But I really appreciate you being here and taking the time to be on my podcast. So thank you very much.

Thank you so much for having me, Gary.