Never Let Fear Stop You From Fulfilling Your WHY

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Welcome to beyond you'd why podcast, where we go beyond just talking about your why and actually helping you discover your why. And so you know, in each of these podcasts, I bring on guests that have one of the different nine whys, and we get to talk about how their why has played out in their life. And today we're going to be talking about the why of Better Way. So if you have not yet discovered your why, go to whyinstitute.com and discover your why. And then come back and listen to this because this will have more impact in your life when you know your why. But today we're going to be talking about the why of Better Way. And so, if you remember, people with the why of Better Way are always looking for better ways to do things. They're great at taking something that's already there and innovating it and improving it. They always ask the question, how can we do this better? They can sometimes be almost irritants in a certain way because they're always trying to make things better and they're rarely satisfied. But they're great taking things that are already there and improving upon them. And so today I have a great guest for you. He is a former Navy SEAL. He's a coach, trainer, and mentor for Seal Fit. He's a co founder of Trident CrossFit, which is one of the largest CrossFit gyms on the East Coast. He's the winner of the TV series One Man Army. He's an entrepreneur and an adventure athlete. Please welcome Chris Smith. Chris, welcome to the podcast.

How are you doing, Gary? Glad to be here finally. Right? Long road coming.

It's tough to get our schedules to meet, but I'm glad we finally did.

Yeah, it's good. I'm glad to be here.

So one of the things that's really interesting for all the listeners is that when you meet somebody that has your why, you see the same things. And, you know, it's funny when you and I talk, Chris, like we talked a little bit before the podcast, we're almost always talking about the same thing, the same way, doing the same stuff. It's like, I got a brother here that, you know, we have a twin here. It's pretty interesting.

It's always crazy when I talk to you because I do feel like you're my brother from another mother. Not only do we talk about the same things, but our lives are kind of, like, running in parallel with our challenges, our successes, our adventures. They're always, like, right in the same line. So it's super kind of crazy. Every time I talk to you, I'm like, wow, it is my brother, right?

Well, one of the things that Chris mentioned right before we got on the. On the podcast was that he had just had this PRP done to his shoulder. Well, four weeks ago, I just had stem cell done to my shoulder. We're just right on the same path. But it is when you meet somebody that has your same why, you'll be able to look into their eyes and you'll see. You'll know what they're thinking. You can almost see their brain clicking the same way that yours is, because you know what it is that they're thinking. So, Chris, tell us a little bit about, you know, you see on TV shows all the time so much about the Navy SEALs, and they're getting so much exposure right now in many different ways. What was it like for you? Why did you want to become a Navy seal?

Big question. Easy. And I think I like what you're talking about. The exposure that we're getting or the team guys are getting right now. Some of it's kind of good, some of it's not kind of good. When I decided to become Navy seal, I love the mystique and the mysteriousness of, oh, my God, who are these guys and what do they do? They're the. Our nation's most elite warrior. And they were still kind of clandestine and stuff. So I'm not 100% certain that all the publicity and stuff that we're getting right now isn't a good thing. But I think the job that guys are doing is still super powerful. For me personally, I kind of. Growing up, I joined the SEAL teams late. I joined. I was 29 years old, which is the last cutoff age you can go. Go become a Navy seal. Before that, I was doing a lot of adventure racing. I was doing a lot of triathletes. I was doing all these things looking for or trying to challenge myself to kind of discover what my capabilities are, what my capacity was, what I'm able to accomplish, you know, And I found it very difficult to push myself to that place where I was learning something, to push my place, that place, to the place where I was kind of suffering enough to get a viable lesson or just finding myself. I was on exploration of finding myself, and I thought, where better to look than our nation's Most elite warriors in the SEAL team. So that's one reason why I decided to join was like, okay, if I can't push myself that hard, well, let me see if these guys can do it. And let me let you know they absolutely did it.

Yeah.

Before you joined the, you know, the seal, what were you doing?

Yeah, so I was working as a electrical engineer for Westinghouse. Did that job for about nine years. I kind of went up the regs in the Westinghouse. So I was in the corporate world. I was living that corporate life, making a lot of money, partying a lot, having a lot of fun, training, playing a lot, you know, doing all the stuff regular people do in a good life. Yes, I was living that life, but I knew it wasn't really fulfilling, fun, adventurous, doing the right thing, doing all the stuff my parents would think I was supposed to be doing, but I knew, like, in the inside that I really wasn't kind of maximized what I felt I was capable of, you know, So I was looking for that. So, yeah, I was like a normal guy doing normal things and relatively successful. Just, you know, in your heart, you know, whether or not you're giving you 100% all the time in your heart, you know, whether or not you're. You're being as productive as you possibly can. So, you know, you spend time in the mirror, you look, you realize that, wow, I'm just kind of faking it here a little bit. Or still seeking, still searching for something else.

Yeah. So even before that, Chris, where did you grow up, and what was your childhood like growing up? And then how did you end up to become an engineer? Because engineer is not like something you decide on a whim because you got lots of school and lots of challenges to become an engineer and then to just give all that up to join the service seems quite extreme.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I grew up in Kansas, the flatlands.

It's so funny. I'm like, yeah, I'm actually from Kansas, which is kind of weird. Yeah. So I grew up in normal household. My father was a career man in the Air force. He did 26 years in the Air Force. My mother, you know, worked for Hallmark for, I think, 20 years or so. So we live the normal, average person's life. I have two sisters, one two years younger, one two years older. Absolutely typical normal family growing up. Nothing besides our energy, charisma, just our love for each other. That stuff is, you know, above board. But as far as you look at, like, oh, my God, you came from an exceptional place. Or you came from this downtrodden life of suffering and your childhood was bad. None of that was. Was in my life at all. It was. It was completely normal. You know, we all went to school, we all went to college. We all had enough money to eat. We weren't suffering in any way. We were just completely normal people looking for exception. Both my sister doing exceptional things as well. But we're completely normal. Childhood moved around a lot in the military, obviously, so we got to travel a lot. Got to go to Japan, got to go to Korea. Got to see a little bit of the world, you know, from a military. From a military kind of optic, if you will. So nothing like exceptional is an out of the ordinary. Yeah. Had opportunities. My father and mother took chances. Took opportunities. Right. So they always told us that we can go do and be whatever we put our minds to, which makes a lot of sense now in my life. Not sure if it made sense, then what that actually meant, but having that foundation or having that, like. I really remember my mother, like, never telling me, no, I couldn't go do something, even if it was as stupid as, like, hey, mom, look at me. I remember standing on top of our roof of our house, and there's a pot of leaves, and I'm about ready to jump down. My mom's like, I'm like, oh, look, I'm gonna jump in the leaves. And she didn't say, no, get down off the roof. That's the stupidest thing ever. She said, well, dude, I don't think that's the best idea, but go ahead if you want to.

Did you do it? Of course I did it.

I didn't break anything. It was painful, but I didn't break anything. And in true fashion, my mom, like, my mom is so supportive. Both parents are so supportive. But my mom was like, told you so, you know, she didn't, like, there was no punishment or anything. She's like, go ahead and explore that. You know, which is funny because both my sisters and myself, we have that idea that we can go be or do anything regardless. I mean, we take consequences and consideration and everything. But it's like, wow, like, you're only holding yourself back. You're only telling yourself no. That you can't do something or be being afraid to do something. So my parents were, like, super supportive in anything and everything that we kind of wanted to do. You know, even if it's a bad idea that I go, yeah, sure, go try it. See what happens.

So, yeah, college went to school, and why engineer?

I'm A better weight kind of guy. Bro, I'm not sure if I've had an original idea ever, but if you show me something, I guarantee you I have a way to make it better. And that's always been. I've always been kind of good at math. Every time I looked at something, I have this saying that say, if man can build it, build it. Man can unbuild it. Which means growing up, I tore apart everything. See how it worked. My mind just worked very well as an engineer. So it just. It was just easy for me to kind of. It was a path of least resistance. It was a natural kind of progression of what made sense to me. Yes. And I went to work for Westinghouse for a while, which is cool, like I mentioned before, and just realized I just wasn't really living to the fullest of my. What I thought my capacity was. I was really searching for kind of who I was and what I could do better.

So when, you know, the listeners think about. Or when I think would think about a Navy seal. In my mind, I picture, you know, a guy about 6, 5, 270 pounds of solid muscle that can run through buildings and jump off, you know, do anything.

Yeah, yeah.

And I'm not sure if that is actually describes you as an engineer.

Not at all. I was a scrawny little kid. I have had asthma growing up. I was allergic to everything growing up. I didn't like to eat food very much. I was super, super small. I mean, I graduated college like 106 pounds. I went in the Navy at 133 pounds.

At 29 years old. Like, not the big, hulking, massive, picturesque Navy SEAL that you can think about, but. Yeah, the exact opposite. But, you know, if you talk to any team guy now or SEAL now, and it's like, it's not about your physical prowess. You know, it's only 20% physical. It's 80% mental. So you can't discount grit, you can't discount why you can't discount, like, you can't discount the things that make people tick, you know, and that's why I love what you're doing is like understanding who you are, why you're doing what you're doing is so powerful. You know, you can distill it down. Your process distills it down really, really quickly now, which is great. Back then we didn't really have that. We're like, oh, what are your goals? What is this? What is that? It was very difficult to kind of figure out what that is. So we kind of flound a lot. But I knew that. I knew I wanted to be a Navy seal. I knew that nothing was going to stop me. Doesn't matter the size I was, I was shivering and freezing cold every single day during that year of training, you know, but not, not to discourage it, just like to empower, so to speak, you know. Yeah.

So what was your first day in SEAL training like for you?

Well, you have to realize first that the journey starts six years prior to me actually going to buds. BUDS is Basic Underwater Demolition SEAL training. It's the school you go to become a Navy seal. Of course you have to join the Navy first, but that process for me didn't start or started six years beforehand. So I was still working for Westinghouse Engineer. I was still doing all that stuff. And I was starting to tell people that, wow, you know, I think I want to be a Navy seal. And remember back in a time when we didn't have all this publicity, we didn't have all this media, so it was still kind of underground and people just didn't know about it so much. And I'm starting to tell the people that I care about, the people that I love, my girlfriend, my parents, all these people. I'm starting to kind of start this process of, oh, I want to be a Navy seal. Oh, I'm going to be a Navy seal. And you know, I mean, my little sister telling me, dude, Navy SEALs are not the baby killers and they're mean and ruthless and they're the 260 pound guy that runs through walls. You know, that was the idea, the mysterious mystique back there. So I'm telling all these people this for a period of six years. I finally pulled the trigger. Join the Navy, go to buds. And day one one of buds. So BUDS is like I said, it's the school you go to. Day one one. Everything you do is based. It's called an evolution. Day one one, the first evolution is the obstacle course. And I have to be fast on my feet, I have to be light, I have to be agile. So I did the O course really, really well. During that course, one of the instructors yelled, I'm about to climb a rope and cross over. And this instructor's like, you know, smitty black guys can't swim. It's an antagonistic school. They're like, they're trying to attack me. Get you under your skin and see what you're really made of. And I'm like, Dr. Mr. Right. I finished the old course. Good time, whatever, next evolution is Like a life saving. Basically. They run you over to the pool. It's like a mile run to the pool. You're fully dressed, your boots are on, you've got square knots in your boots. You got full pants, belt, full shirt tucked in, full hat. And they're like, they put you on this high platform and you take a giant leap off the platform. And in the brochure that says, oh yeah, you tread some water and try to save your life by. It's written so nicely in the, in the brochure, you know, it's like, oh, yeah, it's summer camp, you're gonna love it, you know, but when you get there, it's a little bit different. So, so I'm in the water and like, you know, everything, you have this expectation ahead, like, oh, it's not going to take that long, it's not gonna be that hard or whatever. And like, you're treading water for like 45 minutes to an hour before the test even starts. And I just wasn't prepared for that. I'm exhausted. You know, you're fully dressed in the deep end of the pool and you're like treading water and I am literally like smoked out already. This is third, the second hour, the third hour in buds, you know, and I'm completely exhausted. And they're like, all right, take off your boots. And I'm like, you got to go in the water to untie your shoes. And. And I'm so tired, I can't even hold my breath for like five seconds. So I'm trying and trying and trying and ended up failing that first evolution, that second evolution. And remember that I have told everybody that I care about, everybody that I love. Like, everybody knows that I'm giving up this nice, secure, cushy job as an engineer. I'm giving up my life to go do this thing. And literally three hours into this, this thing, I fail. Completely fail. Dude, you don't get a chance to fail. The school is not based on people that fail. The school is based on people that succeed. So I fail and I'm like, holy shit. I just freaking just failed this thing, right? And who knows what's you go and you're in the regular Navy after that. But lucky that didn't happen for me. So six or seven of us failed that evolution. And literally we're the next 30 minutes were standing in front of the commanding officer of buds, like begging to stay into training, you know, I was like, holy cow. Yeah, it's like, it was so, you know, you go There you think, like, oh, it's going to be great. I'm going to pass this thing. It's going to be awesome. And that just didn't manufacture for me at all. And I'm sitting there, like, begging for my life or begging to stay in the training. And it was just like, holy cow, this guy has the power to completely derail all my grandiose plans of becoming an elite warrior. Just with a stroke of a pin. He's like, hey, man, you can just go right back to the Navy and paint ships or paint rocks or sweep or whatever, because I had no real job, you know? And it's like.

So how did you get him? Like I said, I was up on the ropes, I'm crossing ropes and instructor Mrs. Like, you know, black guys can't swim. So out of the six or seven guys that were standing in front of the man on the carpet, it was like four black guys.

It proved him right. Proved him right. I was like, fuck, I can't believe this. Right? There is a. I guess I would call him a mentor now, but there was a guy named Senior Chief Gower who was kind of running the phase of training that we're in. And he pulls us to the side and he gives us this speech about how we think that this training is about us, the individual, how we think that being tired matters, how we think that we're not part of a larger picture, part of a team, part of a bigger concept in this thing called seals. Like, we're failing because, oh, we're worried about ourselves. We're worried about drowning. We're worried about not being out of air. We're worried about all these things personally instead of what the bigger picture was. I know now what I didn't know then, but what he was talking about was your why. Like, what are you doing here? Like, you said you wanted to do this, but you're not even willing to put out, and you're willing to fail right away, you know? So he starts talking to us, and he kind of explains this to us. Like, man, you know what? You guys have an opportunity. And just so you know, seeing you, this is not a story about black people. White people, but he has to be black as well. So, like, he was talking to all six or seven of us, but I felt like he was talking to me like, I have a bigger responsibility. This isn't about you, Mr. Smith. This is about a bigger responsibility. This is about you becoming a Navy seal, you know, this is about you become part of this community. You becoming part of the SEAL teams. And I felt his word just, like, pierce me, you know? Then he does something that, like, sticks with me forever. He goes, here's what I'm going to do. And he's making, like, direct fiery eye contact. He's like, I'm going to give you a silver bullet. This is like, he's vouching for us that we're going to make. Make it through this training, right? I'm going to give you a silver bullet, right? He's going to go to bat for us and talk to the commanding officers to let us stay in training, right? I'm like, holy shit, dude. Like, that meant a lot to me. I was like, holy cow. This guy's. He doesn't even know me. We've been here for three hours. He's like, I'm going to put my word on the line that you guys are going to make it through this training. He was talking to all of us, but I felt like he was just talking to me. And, like, literally, he goes away. He goes talks to the commanding officer. Commanding officer comes back in. He's all like, all right, guys, second chance. Back to the pool. We're like, what.

Wait? We don't get to practice or train or practice or something first?

How about some rest?

Can we get a little. Little? Yeah. Like, we're like, 45 minutes an hour into this thing now. I'm like, holy cow. And Sienschafe Gower comes up, and he looks us, like, in the eye, and he's like, back to the pool. And we're like, our clothes are still wet right from the event, and we run back a mile back to the pool. We do that evolution again. And what's miraculous is you're more tired, you're more scared. You know, you have one bout of experience. You've had this experience inside the water. You jumped off the thing. You're in the water, you're treading water, so you kind of know what's coming a little bit. So your expectations managed a little bit better, but still, you didn't get any better at the task.

No.

Get any more practice. Nothing changed, bro. Like, nothing changed, you know? How did you make it through, dude? Like, literally, I have no idea. No, literally, dude, you're on the high dive. You jump off the thing, you treadwatch for 45, 50 minutes to an hour, whatever it is. Take off your boots. Fucking hold your breath. Untie your shoes. Take off your boots. Tie your boots together. Put them around your neck. Take off your pants. Take off your pants. Tie it in Your pants together, put air in your pants, it becomes a life buoy. Take off your shirt, take off this, take off that. And you're like, oh, my God, I just passed this evolution. Wow. The difference was I didn't get any better. Like, I didn't learn any more skills. I wasn't able to hold my breath longer. Nothing changed except for one thing. My why? The reason I was there changed. It was galvanized. It was clear. It was simple. Don't pass evolution, you don't become a Navy seal. That's what changed. Wow. I don't know. I don't know if it was belief someone else in me or whatever, but that's what changed. Like, I didn't get any better. How did I get any better? I didn't anymore. Tools. Nothing changed. But the reason I was there, my why, my purpose, that's what changed.

That's a great story. That's a great true story. But how did the other guys do?

Think three or four guys passed and the rest of them didn't, you know, wow.

So they didn't hear it the same way you did?

They didn't hear it the same way I did. Or you could say, like, literally, I know we're talking about why and stuff, but literally, their. Their pictures wasn't clear. Like they didn't know why they were there.

You know, seemed like a good thing to do.

Seemed like a good thing to do. And you can hear it in people, too. Like, you probably don't get to hear this, but I hit it all the time. It's like there's a difference with people coming. So I run a training for training camp here at the gym, and I help people kind of explore their decisions on becoming a Navy seal. We do some training. It's really hard, yada, yada. And two kind of people come to me. Some people come to me and they say, I want to be a Navy seal. Right? Statement, period. That's it. Some people come to me and say, I want to go to buds. Can you hear the difference there?

Yeah, for sure.

Some people come to me and tell me their goal, their reason, their why. I want to be a Navy SEAL in state, right? The training is irrelevant. I want to be a Navy seal. Doesn't matter what you do. To me, I want to be a Navy seal. So I'm going to do everything that it takes to become that. Some people come to me and say, I want to go to buds. BUDS is just the training to become a Navy seal. So their pitcher stops at buds. So they get the buds and they jump off the high dive and they trade water like, well, they've already accomplished their goal. They got to buds. Their goal wasn't to become a Navy seal, it was just to get the buds. And those are the guys that have a lot of trouble. They don't have a clear picture. They don't have a why. Wow.

How long is buds?

So buds actually is six months long. Right. So if you do everything well and you pass all the evolutions, man, day one starts, six months later, you get a trident and you move on. We'll go into a regular SEAL team. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen for the Chris at all because he's very, very skinny. Right. I'm £130 something there. So it took me a year to graduate that program, which is not super uncommon. A lot of people have troubles. The program is designed for you to fail or overcome things and to look deep inside yourself and you know you're going to not pass every evolution, not going to pass every test. So you get a chance to redo that sometimes or sometimes you don't. They just kick you out. But yeah, so it took me a year to year to get out of that. Most people struggle and sure, you know, it's called Hell week. It's a five day week long, nonstop, beat down, but you get very little sleep, maybe two hours for the week, two and a half hours for the week. And most people decide not to continue training during that week because it's super challenging, super difficult. Lot of stress, a lot of cold, lot of bad things happen to you there. It's, it's the crucible. It's the crucible within the program. Right. And most people that finish Hell week, typically they'll graduate. It didn't work out for me that way during my hell week in class 205, there's a lot of nighttime evolutions, a lot of cold, a lot of wet, a lot of sandy, a lot of dirty, lot of, a lot of bad things can happen. But Wednesday, during the week, it starts on Sunday night, Monday kind of forget. But Wednesday, middle of the training, I hype it, I get hypothermia, it's just cold. I'm skinny, just shivering the whole entire time. Body temperatures just didn't work out so well for me. But during a two mile swim, yeah, I hyped out, got hypothermia. Have the lowest, if not. Yeah, second lowest or the lowest. I still want to say the lowest rectal body temperature ever in buds. Although a friend of mine said there's a guy that got a little bit lower than me, but I don't know about that. But mine was pretty low. So I had a rectal body temperature, which means during buds I had this real skinny flexible thermometer. My Yaya, I'm boot.

Because they're doing tests all the time, right. They're doing tests to see like we don't kill anybody, but it's cold there. So all the skinny guys and some of the heavy guys, they were doing kind of tests and I had a thermometer at my butt like the whole time in buds and they, after the super cold evolutions, they come and they take a reading and whatever. But. So I hyped that on a swim and I recorded a bite erected body temperature of 88.4 degrees. Wow. Yeah.

And for those who don't know, it's.

Supposed to be what, 98.6 is your average body temperature? Yeah. Typically like past 89 or 80 something, you're supposed to die. But apparently I got, I don't know, didn't die. That's kind of good.

So they pulled you out.

Yeah. So I got pneumonia, I got pleurisy. So basically pleurisy, that happens. So, you know, you're so cold that your, your avioli in your, in your lungs start profusing blood. So your lungs are filling with blood. So. So you end up coughing up this nasty bloody sputum as your lungs filled with blood. You're trying to expel that, you know, so you can exchange air. Basically. Yeah. So it's unsafe for you to continue training. I remember on that swim, I remember being very cold. My swim buddies right next to me always with the buddy being very cold. And I remember just like, you know, starting to swim and I remember swimming and I kind of remember finishing the swim. I remember the instructor in the boat saying, hey, go down and get a bottom sample. Which means you go down to the bottom of the ocean, grab some mud, come back up, put it on your head, then you tell them your name, then you get out of the water. I kind of remember that. Then I kind of remember being on the beach at the finish and I kind of remember kind of being during the middle of the swim and I kind of remember being back at the beach, you know, so I've got these black spots in my mind about what's actually happening because I freaking, you know, I'm hyped out. I'm basically swimming unconscious. Basically. I remember the doctor on the beach asking me a very simple question like, hey, what's Seven plus two. I vividly remember me answering, well, that's the dumbest question ever. That's nine. Of course.

Of course the video that pursued. After a while, the video has me saying.

There'S no motor skills left. The brain is like, shut down. You know, my body's like, it's just shutting down. But in my head, I remember very clearly the question. Now I have black spots and timing issues. Like, oh, then I remember being in medical where the nurse is undressing me. Boom. I remember being back in the swim. Boom. I remember being sitting in a, like this little life preserver donut in the hot tub, trying there as they're trying to rewarm my body. Boom. I remember the guy asking me questions on the beach. Boom. I remember someone giving me cookies and sugar so I can kind of get my. My blood back. Boom. I remember being back in the pool, in the, in the ocean. Spots are all, like, out of sync in my brain, you know, because, you know, you come conscious, you go unconscious, whatever. But I remember these things in out of sync, you know, so I'm obviously pretty messed up. I remember talking about the power, the reason why, and your clarity of your goals and simplicity and of that is I know I wanted to be what I know I want to be a Navy seal. I know that you have to go through this program to become a Navy seal. That's in my head the whole time. I'm never going to quit because I want to be a Navy seal. I remember you're only allowed to miss a total of two hours of training during that week. You know, I'm in the medical, I'm kind of getting warmed up and the time is crunching on, so I've got to be to go back to training or I'm out of the program. So I'm getting dressed and I'm still coughing up blood and stuff. And I remember trying to run back to my class with, you know, the medical guys with me when I'm trying to run back to class so I can be back in class, I don't, you know, miss the timeline, the cutoff. And, you know, it's nighttime and they're about to go get some surf torture, which means you're going to go lay in the ocean and freeze your balls off for a while. I remember being in that line and arm in arm with the rest of my brethren in the class. And, you know, Chris isn't healthy, bro. I mean, blood is coming out of the lungs, the nose, everything. And I'm just like. But I know I don't want to quit, Gary. I know if I quit, I cannot become a Navy seal. That's what's in my head. Health be damned if I quit. I cannot become a Navy seal. That's what I know. So I'm there, and I'm locking arm in arm, and I'm just like, shit's, like, everywhere coming out. It's nighttime. And I remember the doctor coming up. He's all like, damn, dude, you don't look so good. He's doing the light thing, and I'm coughing. He's like, hey, we got to pull you out of training. And in my head, what happens if you get pulled out of training? You don't become. Yeah, you don't become a Navy seal. And what's my goal? I want to be a Navy seal. So I'm like, fucking. I'm not quitting. No, no, I'm not going anywhere. And the class is like, stay. You know, because, dude, they're your brothers, man. You spend a lot of time. You suffered a lot with these guys, and they're like, no, don't quit. I'm like, I'm not quit. You know, I'm just yelling at this guy, and he's like, dude, we know you're not quit, man, but you're going to die. You can't. You can't stay here. You're like, you're unhealthy. You can't stay here. You're not. You can't. I'm just like, no, no. You know, I'm like, I'm not going to quit. Because in my head, dude, if you quit or you miss training, you don't become a Navy seal. The goal is not realized. And that's what's in my head. Like, that's what's in my head. And I recognize that I'm sick. I recognize that I'm not healthy. I know blood is coming out of everywhere. I know that. But I know, well, if you don't continue training, you can't become a Navy seal. So the commanding officer comes by, you know, a couple out minutes later or whatever, and he's all like, hey, bro. You can say like that. He's like, smitty, Smitty, I know you're not quitting. You have to go to the hospital. And literally, they. Not to be dramatic here, but literally, I'm holding on to my brothers locked arm in arm, and they, like, pry my hands apart. They move me out, they take off my life preserve, and they put me in the ambulance, and I go to the hospital.

Wow.

So yeah, but you know, just the power of purpose, the power of why the clarity of like what you want to do, like how that ground you into decision is, you know, there's no words for it. Like if you're that committed to whatever you want to do, man, like nothing is going to stand in your way, you know.

And then you had to do it all over again, right?

Dude, you got to start from day one, one again.

Start over and do it again.

Start over. And I'm like, oh my God, I can do that damn life table life saving test again. I got to jump that damn high. Die. Got a tread water. Oh.

That again. Yeah. You know, and it's like, it's funny because as we, we don't recognize it immediately but all the things, all that we are is like this culmination of this expression of past experiences. You know, I've ridden a bicycle before, so I could probably ride a bike again. I fallen off a bike and all that. How bad that hurts. So hey, I can fall off a bike again. So kind of going through those first couple weeks, the second time was so much less stressful. I'm not going to say it's easier. It was just so much less stressful because I had some experience with those, those tests, those evolutions prior to that. So the life saving test was not nearly as dramatic, not nearly as hard. Passing the first go around that next time, you know, those first couple of days in hell week, you know, it's the same every, every hell week. So I've had those experiences before. So I probably gained a couple pounds, you know, so I wasn't as cold. I was cold, but wasn't as cold. And everything's not a slap in your face or a shock. So up to that point of that Wednesday was cool. And I had been hardened from that experience. So like after my second class 207 upon that Friday, when you come to get out of hell week, they were looking at me like, dude, did you even go through hell week? Because in my everything was tougher, harder. Like everything on my body was just stronger. Like everything was just more righteous. I had such a great time. I was smiling, laughing, kind of going through. Not that I wasn't suffering, but my mental, my mental game was just so much different than the first time.

Wow.

Because it's like, oh my God, a gift. Because you know why? Because you recognize, you're like, holy fuck, dude, I can do that. I can do this. Wow. They're not going to kill me. I got frozen. Cool. I'VE been sick as hell. Cool. I've been hurt. I've been suffering like all these things. I'm like, I can do this. So that, that feeling of, holy shit, I can actually do this was just kind of uplifting, you know, it was liberating.

So then you made it through and then you, you were a SEAL for how long?

So I stayed in the Seal teams for 12 years. 12 years? Yeah, I was a Seal team 5 for a couple years, and then I moved over to a special Mrs. Unit in D.C. for a while.

And now. So then you got out of the seals, and what have you been doing since you've been out of the seals?

I've been trying to kind of culminate and utilize those experiences I had in the SEAL teams and the special mission Unit and all the experiences up to this point. I'm what, 40 something years old? I think I've been trying to utilize those things to give back to my community, to give back to people, to empower them, to kind of get on their path of magnificence, get on their journey of exception, get on their journey to things that they want to do. I've been trying to maximize and utilize the skills that I've learned, the experiences that I've learned, all the things that I've learned to help other people kind of get to where they want to go. So we do a lot of training, we do a lot of mentorship, we do a lot of, a lot of hard stuff. I think hard men do hard shit, do a lot of hard stuff to help people get on their path, on their own path of their adventure of excellence or magnificence.

And that kind of led you to CrossFit?

That did lead me to CrossFit. I think it's an awesome, awesome, awesome training protocol. A great foundation to build a tougher body, tougher mind, and like a springboard for whatever you want to do, both physically and emotionally and mentally. You know, it's like, oh, my God, I can, I can suffer during this workout. My body is strong, my mind is strong. Why can I go do the things that I want to do? Right? So, yeah, this gives me, this gives me a platform to kind of utilize some of those tools of mental toughness, physical strength to, to get where you want to get to where a person wants to go.

Well, you, you sent me some pictures a couple of weeks back of your feet after.

You just completed a, an adventure race. So tell people what, what are adventure races? And, and what did you just do?

So adventure races are this Is an expedition adventure race. Adventure races can be anywhere from 5, 6, 7 hours 12 hours to 48 hours 24 hours. This one happened to be seven days. Adventure races is a multi sport event. Typically some kind of water event like kayak, pack, raft, riverboat, canoe, some kind of trekking or running, some kind of foot skills, mountain bike skills, rope climbing skills. Like mountain climbing skills. Be a plethora of multi sport events. The distances change. The one I just did was in called Godzone Chapter 8. It was in New Zealand which is very freaking mountainous. Oh my God. I was not prepared for the elevation for sure. Yeah. So and you race, it's race for time. So you know during our doing chapter eight I think the fastest teams finished in four and a half days. Our team took six and a half days. Yeah but it's what I like most is most of them are team based sports. So four or five people on a team, typically one opposite sex. So on our team we had three males and one female. And the female named Christine was hard as nails. Mad, mad. Much respect dude. She's awesome. All of our team was really awesome. But yeah, she was magnificent. Yeah. So it's a long endurance race, multi sport erase. And it's good. It tests you as well. The same kind of feel like in hell week where very little sleep. I think we slept 12 hours in the six and a half days. So you're moving and you're making your own decisions. You're orienteering with map and compass only. No. No technology. You're working together as a team or you're not working together as a team. You know some things kind of implode and it's just. Yes. Like how much can you suffer, how fast you want to go, what team decisions are you making? And I just, I love it. You know it's what it become to preach here at the gym as well.

You what those pictures you sent me. So the rest of you didn't get that that are listening but he sends me these pictures to my, to my cell phone of his feet that are all huge, huge blisters and your feet are about twice their normal size. What the heck happened to you?

Yeah, so I made some, some amateur racer mistakes man. You know you should learn to listen to your instincts. I was telling my buddy Brian Shantashu I think person is trying to kill me or make me stronger when one of the two. But I love them for it. I was telling them you know during that race a little bit after my feet were all messed up that man I really should have learned this lesson of listen to my. To your inner base instincts, you know. But we're doing a trekking part and a lot of water crossings and I was in my mountain bike shoes and I got a lot of sand in my mountain bike shoes and huge long trek, pushing the bike or whatever. And the sand just starts eroding the bottom of my feet, like, so I've got the, you know, started to blister up like these huge. The entire ball of my foot behind the toes. And the toes were just this one gigantic solid blister. But. And I knew, I knew, like, I knew I should listen to myself, but I didn't want to kind of hold the team back. I was already kind of moving slow, didn't want to hold the team back any further. So I gutted it out and I knew I should have stopped and taken the sand out of my shoes to prolong. We're in day, whatever, two or three of a six day race. I just knew I should have done that. I should have taken the sand out of my shoe, but I didn't listen to myself and continued on. And my feet swollen like baked bread. It was disgusting. It was awesome. Blisters all over. You know, I can suffer. I think I made a poor choice. I should have taken the sand out of my feet and should have been able to move faster later on during the race, whatever. But yeah, so I walked in those nasty, blistered, swollen feet for things like 39 miles. It was great.

That's amazing. Yeah. You know, but I tell you, you know, I kind of beckon back to Senior Chief Gower. He's like, hey, man, like, you can do this, yada, yada. But my friend Tosh, the same thing, you know, I was kind of feeling a little sorry for myself. My feet were. Fuck, they hurt so, so, so bad. He knows me. We do a lot of stuff together. And he knows me very, very, very well. And he let me cry and whimper and fucking be a little punk for a little while. And then he says, hey, man, what you should do is cut the skin off those bushes, fucking start walking. I was like, I was like, roger that, man. I understand. So he let me have my. My sorry time. Let me have my sorry time. Enough. I don't wanna hear it anymore. Dude, you're gonna walk. You're not gonna walk. Make a decision. And I was like, guess we're walking, like, literally. But. And you need that man. You need that somebody to help push you sometimes, you know, and say, yeah, Neil, I understand you're Hurting. I understand this is going on in your life. I understand you're having some problems. I understand all that stuff. But what are you gonna do? Are you gonna give in to what? All these emotions that you're feeling right now, are you gonna give in to the suffering? You're gonna give into the pain? You're gonna give in to whatever's holding you back? Are you going to jump over the fence and keep moving forward? Get over the fear of whatever's happening to you in your life right now and get forward momentum, keep moving forward, make a fricking decision. Keep moving forward or stop moving forward. It's up to you, you know, And I chose right. We finished the race, which is great. Other people will succumb to whatever, and this hurts too bad, and this is a problem, and my life is this, and whatever woe is me, and I'm going to quit and whatever, man. You know, so my feet were bad. They were hurting. But guess what? I'm sure other people's feet were bad and were hurting. Yeah. So we can feel sorry for ourselves a little bit. But hey, man, you know what? You said you wanted to finish the race, so make a decision, you know? So I think I thank Tosh for that, like, every single day now. I'm like, holy cow. You know? So it's really kind of cool just to. It's cool to have people in your court that are. That just keep pushing you to be better, you know, that's what I want to do for other people right now. It's like, I want to push people to be better. And sometimes it's hard. Sometimes you got to suffer and, hey, let me be that beacon for you. Let me be that. That voice in your head that says, hey, dude, you're going to keep walking or not?

You've been an engineer through Buds twice. You've been in the Navy Seal for 12 years. You worked with the Seal Fit group to start and mentor people in that got the CrossFit going. You've got your entrepreneurial businesses going, so what the heck next for you, man? What is there left to. To scare you and challenge you?

Oh, man. You know, I'm kind of leaning towards, like, totally the mentorship and some personal speaking. Not personal. Some speaking now, like, trying to hopefully let my story help other people embrace their story and move forward, to kind of get over the fear, to kind of get over the things that are in their way. Keep that forward momentum, you know, that's I really want to do now is like, I've embraced and I tell people I've embraced that my story is good enough. And sometimes I think that we all feel that our story isn't good enough. So we're constantly seeking validation. We're constantly seeking having someone else tell us that we're good enough for something. But I've embraced that my story is good enough to share and hopefully by sharing it on bigger platforms, on corporate level, private level, small group level, whatever. It is that my story is that they resonate with something that I've done or something that I've experienced and it sets a beacon or sets a guide on for them to go pursue what they want to do in life, to find their own magnificence.

What do you think it is that keeps people from succeeding at bud? Succeeding in business, succeeding in their workouts, succeeding in all these? I mean, you're not doing little things there. Those are not, you know, becoming a Navy Seal is not a little thing. Doing a eight day or seven day or whatever it was, 600 mile race is not an easy little thing. Those are not simple, you know, quick decision kind of things that you're talking about there. What is it that keeps people from succeeding versus those that did succeed?

I think it's the space between the known and the unknown. The space between the known and the unknown is called fear.

Most people succumb to fear. They can't manage their expectations well enough to overcome that. So they let that become the guide on. They let the fear of the unknown paralyze them from forward momentum. That's what it is. I think that's what I've boiled it down to. It's like, hey man, I don't know what's around that corner, so I'm not going to go around that corner.

And how do you defend past that? See, because I feel that in certain areas and I'm sure people listening can say you in their life, there's certain things that they're fearful of and certain steps that they want to take but they don't want to take because of the fear that goes with it. How do you pass fear, dude?

It's momentum. Like, don't get it wrong. I am afraid of a lot of shit still too. That keeps me doing a lot more stuff. This last race I did, dude, I didn't really get a chance to train very much. I was totally like out of shape. I was so worried that I was going to be the weak leak on the team or the purse. I was so worried about all these different things that, you know, secretly I was like, oh, God, please let me get an injury so I can not do this race because I don't want.

To be the first.

I don't want to have to show up.

I don't have to show up. Just give me an excuse, God, let something happen. But no, that didn't happen. So I had to embrace that fear, man. I had to get on a plane and fly 32 hours to New Zealand to get on a team where I knew I was probably going to be the weak link somewhere. I was going to be the weak link. I'm the least trained, I'm the least experienced. The chance of me being the strongest is super, super hard, super fearful. Right? Dude, I still got to go. I got to get on the plane. I got to go. I got to do the best I can in this race. So what gets people out of that fear state is simply momentum. Take the next step forward. After you take that step, take the next step forward. Keep moving until you get around the freaking corner of fear. The problem is that people let. That fear just stops them all the time. It's like, oh, I don't know what's going around that corner. I don't know what's going to happen next. Or they manufacture these ideas of what can possibly happen next, you know, oh, I didn't want to run faster because I didn't know what's coming after the run. Well, shit, you might die before the end of the run, who knows? Run as fast as you can, you know? So that's what keeps people from moving forward, is they have this. They manufacture all these things in their heads of what's going to happen next, or, oh, my God, I don't know what's going to happen next. And they just put this stuff in their heads and they start to believe that because it speaks so much louder than the positive parts of things, you know, than the known. Like it yells at you, oh, don't go jump in that water, because you don't know how deep it is. Well, then just walk in the water, see how deep it is. So you have to jump, you know, keep moving forward. You got to cross the stream, you know, don't jump off the house because you don't know how deep the leaves are. I don't know. Jump off the house, see what happens.

So momentum is just next, small step.

Yes. You know, how do you eat a pie one bite at a time? How to eat a frog one bite at a time? It doesn't matter. You just got to keep moving forward. I'm not saying you have to race forward where, yeah, you're making reckless decisions. Right. You can calculate some decisions, you can calculate some risks, but you still have to move forward if you want to achieve the goals that you want to achieve. If you don't achieve those goals, feel free not to. Not to move forward. Feel free to give into that fear. But then don't go blaming other people. Right. Don't go seeking validation for you not doing something from somebody else. Right. It's on you. Make your own decisions, man. Stand up to it.

You know what has been real obvious to me and listening to your story and your stories and knowing you is the power of what you say you're going to do. You do. I mean, no matter what it takes. I mean, you told them you were going to show up in New Zealand.

Right.

And you want to, but you said you were going to do it.

Yes.

And you told people you were going to be a Navy SEAL and so you had to do it.

Yeah. And in both those instances, too, like using those examples, both those things, hey, man, you know what? Some things pop up and stand in your face and put a big roadblock says, no, you're not going to do this. The first failure of the Evolution for Life Saving event, dude, that's a big thing. It's like, oh, my God, a big obstacle. You're not going to go do this. You know, blisters on your feet for the race. Oh, you could stop any time. Here's an opportunity for you to go ahead and give in to your fear. It's okay. You can get validation from other people because you have blisters on your foot. So you didn't want to continue walking. You can get validation because, oh, I failed an event and I didn't want to go back or whatever. You can always find that validation from your lack of success and people are okay with that. You know, I'm personally just not okay with that. I'm like, if I'm going to fail, fuck yeah, dude. Fail forward, fail forward fast, fail forward hard. It's okay, you know, when you get done with that, dude, get back up and try it again. Fail again. You got to keep moving forward or nothing's ever going to happen. Which is okay. If you choose for something not to happen, that's okay. But don't blame other people. Don't go seeking validation that it's okay not to go do what you want to do. Right.

I see myself doing that in different areas of my life where I, I can easily find a reason to blame somebody else for something that didn't happen the way I wanted it to go, right?

Absolutely, absolutely.

Instead of just saying, why don't I just keep going and shut up and decide what it is you want and then you end up there.

Yeah. I think also the problem sometimes is again, we have to learn to either manage. We have to learn, we do. We have to learn to manage our expectations. So if you set, we'll say a goal to, hey, I'm going to lose whatever, 20 pounds in 30 days or whatever. Right. And you're moving towards that goal. You have some momentum. Well, you can't be disappointed if you only lost 15 pounds in those 30 days because you're still moving in that direction. So the expectation was for you to lose 20 or whatever. I said 20 pounds in 30 days. That didn't manifest. But so what? Keep moving forward. The goal should be to lose 20 pounds. The number of days is the limit of the self limiting factor. The goal should be just to lose £20. Why do you have to set like this hard line on there all the time? And I think a lot of people, they don't measure expectations because they set their expectations in the wrong. They're confused. Their expectation for what they actually want to do, what they actually want to do in case of weight loss is to lose weight. So why give it a timeline? Why can't it be a lifetime? Hey, I want to lose £20. We'll start moving in that direction for the rest of your life until you lose £20, then fucking celebrate. Sorry, I'm starting to cuss. Then just celebrate.

I can hear you as a trainer if you f bombs coming out probably quite often.

Yeah, right, yeah, exactly.

So let's say I'm listening to this now and I am having some events coming up and I am going to want to have you come speak at those events. But let's say I'm somebody listening to this and I want to get ahold of you because I would love to have have the concept of overcoming fear and keeping your word be a part of what my event is about. How do they get ahold of you? What's the best way to get ahold of you?

Yeah, so we're just launching my new website. It's chris.smith.com it's going to be out probably in two weeks. Putting the final touches on it now. So you can do that. You can also reach me via email. You can go Chrisch R S srident crossfit V.

So that's Chris C H R A S s@trident crossfit va like virginia.com. but my website would be up here probably end of this week. That's way as well. So when I get that up, I'll send that information to you. You can kind of patch it in somehow or. Yeah, yeah.

You have found a lot of better ways to make things happen and keep your word and keep moving forward and overcoming fear.

And it's.

It's fascinating. And I know we could talk for forever and there's way more stories that you've got that I would love to hear and others would love to hear, but, man, Chris, I thank you for taking time out on a Sunday. This is a Sunday and being on here with me. So I really appreciate that, man.

I love chatting with you, Gary. Like any time, man. We should do like a little follow up, you know, let's do it. We'll get the website, we'll get a little follow up. And I just love talking with you, dude. Like, I feel like, I don't know, you're a brother from another mother. You understand me? You understand me, Gary?

I do. And everybody else who's got a better way, their why is better way, we'll listen to this and they'll just get you. They're just probably nodding like, man, I.

Get it, I get it.

That's how I do it too.

Yeah. I got to tell you, man, I'm not. This isn't a shameless plug for you, but you know as well that every single person that I try to influence, I use your tool.

That's so awesome.

YNC.com Every single person. A guy just came to me just two days ago and he's like, hey, I want to start training here, yada yada. I'm like, that's all cool. Why don't you this first go to wisetude.com first let me figure out who you are because it helps me communicate with him, right? He's a contributor. I'm like, well, I can't use better way phraseology or better way like the way I think to talk to contributor, because they just think differently so that my syntax of the way that I try to communicate with them is different. Once I understand that. So literally I use that tool, I can't. You know how many times I use it too? Because I tell you, I was like, hey, look, I mean, like, I'm trying to go for the most number of people sent to your tool ever, like legit. I like to win, man.

They win at all costs.

So win at all costs. But I can't tell you the value of like sounds kind of weird, but you just coming into my life and you came into it and the tool that you bring to the world, like, I'm telling you, dude, I use that thing all the time. Like all the time.

It's a better way, right?

It is a better way. My wife thanks you too because I can communicate with her better too. She's a challenge. Dennis Cole. So I'm like, oh, okay, I got it.

Another strange thing for the, for the listeners is my wife has the same why as his wife does.

Yeah, right.

But hey, listen, thank you so much for sharing your stories with us and everybody knows how to get in touch with you and I'll be in touch with you as well. So thanks for being here today, Chris.

Okay. I appreciate you, man. All right. Bye. Bye.