The 9 WHY's

This episode of beyond you'd why is brought to you by our why App. Head over to yinstitute.com to take our free why app and discover your why. Today.

In this podcast, we're going to get into the nine whys. We're going to talk about the characteristics of each why, we're going to talk about the challenges that come with each why, and then we're going to talk about the solutions to those challenges so that you get to know all of the nine whys. Now, why would that be important to you? So you've taken the why app, or if you haven't taken the Y app yet, go ahead and take it. Stop the podcast, go to yinstitute.com and take the Y app. It's right there on the homepage. So go to yinstitute.com, w h yinstitute.com and take the Y app and then come back and listen to all of the nine whys. So this is really important to you because you're going to know your why, and then you're going to be able to get deeper into your why. You're going to get to know more about your why, and then you're also going to get to know the whys, the nine whys, so that you see the people around you from the perspective of their why. If you have your significant other or your child or your parent or your co workers take the why app, then you'll be able to have great conversations with them about their why. You'll get to understand them from the perspective of their why. You'll see their strengths, you'll see their weaknesses, you'll see all those crazy things that they do, and you'll understand how that would make sense to them. So today is going to be about the nine whys, and I'll go through them one at a time so that you get to understand them. All right? As I talked about in the previous podcasts, I kind of became obsessed with helping other people discover their why. Once I discovered my why. See, my why is to find a better way and share it. And once I found a better way to help someone discover their why, which was also a better way to understand who they are, I really couldn't stop myself from sharing it. So anybody who was near me or on a plane with me or was having a conversation with me, they were going to get their why discovered. I found a way to help them discover their why, because I just couldn't help myself. And I started doing more and more and more why discoveries and I started getting asked to do more and more why discoveries. And it got to the point where I was doing why discoveries all over the world, on Skype, on stages, at events, helping people to discover their why. And I started to notice these patterns and trends and similarities. And I found after working with many, many, many people, that there was only nine different whys. And that was the most important thing that I discovered, the nine whys. The reason the nine whys were so important is because now we had an endpoint. When I was trying to discover my why, I didn't never know if I was there, right? I kept going backwards and backwards in my life and looking at different stories and trying to figure out a pattern and trying to figure out what my why was. But I never had an endpoint. I never felt quite right because I didn't know if that was actually my why. And now that I've seen it so many times in so many different people, I know that the nine whys allows us to have an endpoint where we can stop and say, ah, that is your why. And now that we know your why, now we can actually use it. We can do something with.

Will have an impact in our life when you know your why, but you have to know it. And that's what was so powerful about the nine whys. And once I figured out the nine whys, then I could help somebody discover their why in about 30min minutes. And then once I could help someone and figure out their why in 30 minutes, I started getting more and more and more data. And that's when I was able to create the algorithm and the questions that you answered to discover your why. There's about 15,000 choices of questions in the why app, but you only have to answer about 10 to 12 to discover your why. And it triple checks itself. So I'm very confident the results that come from the Y app. But now what I want to do is go through and explain all the nine whys to you. And so what we'll do is let's go through them all first so that you see them all, so you can get out a piece of paper and pencil right now and you can write all the nine whys down. And then I'll go back and go into more detail of each one. Like I said, I'll go through the, through the characteristics, I'll go through the challenges, I'll go through the solutions to those challenges for each of the nine whys so that you get to see them and you can see how this would apply to yourself and to your significant to significant people in your life once they've taken the why app, it will help you with your relationships. It'll help you make great decisions. It'll get you on the right track. So let's do that. Let's jump into the nine whys and let me go through all nine of them with you right now so that you have them. Okay, so the first why is contribute to contribute to a greater cause, make a difference, add value, or have an impact in the lives of others. The second why is trust to create relationships based upon trust. The third why is make sense to make sense out of things, especially if complex or complicated. The fourth why is better way to find a better way and share it. The fifth why is right way to do things the right way in order to get results. The sixth why is challenge to think differently and challenge the status quo. The seventh Y is master to seek mastery and understanding. The eighth why is clarify to clarify or create clarity. And the ninth why is simplify to make things simple. Those are the nine whys. What I'll do now is go back and go through those nine whys in more detail. Okay, so let's start with contribute, right? To contribute to a greater cause, make a difference, have an impact or add value. What you might hear these people say would be something like what can I do to help? How can I have a bigger impact? What can we do to make a difference? How can I be a better teammate? How can I be part of the team? Right, so if this is your why, then you want to be part of a greater cause. You want to be part of something bigger than yourself. You don't necessarily want to be the cause, but you want to contribute to it in a meaningful way, right? You love to support others and you love the success of the greater good or the victory of the team. You're often behind the scenes looking for ways to make the world a better place. You're a go to person. You know, the one that you look for when you need help with just about anything, Whether that's picking up a broom to sweep the floor or sitting down and having a deep in depth conversation with somebody to help them move forward. You make a reliable and committed teammate and you often act as the glue that holds everything else together. So you're the person that uses your time and your money and your energy and your resources and your connections to add value to other people, to help them move forward and to help them have a greater impact. So when you help other people have a greater impact, they in Turn can make a bigger difference and that's what makes you feel so good. Now there's challenges that come with this. Why the challenge with this? Why is the tendency to over commit, right? Saying yes to request after request after request? Because you want to be the person that contributes and makes a difference. So if somebody asks you to help, your first thing that you want to say is, sure, I'll help. What can I do? Right? Friends are going to tell you to just learn to say no, right? Just say no. But what they don't understand is that when you say no, that kind of goes against everything you believe you want to contribute. And when you contribute, that gives you success and makes you feel successful. So someone telling you to just say no really falls on deaf ears or actually makes you feel bad. So you may often find yourself giving in to so many areas that you feel overwhelmed and you can't get to the things that you want to accomplish. So you're so busy helping other people that your goals, your dreams, your things get pushed to the side because you're never able to have enough time to do them right. Sometimes you can just feel completely overwhelmed. So what are the solutions now? The key for you to overcoming this challenge is to identify and recognize where you can make the greatest possible contribution. And you need to focus your efforts there. In other words, every time you have someone come up to you and say, hey, will you help or can you help with this, you want to ask yourself the question, if I agree to that, will it enable me to make the maximum contribution that I can possibly make? Or is this, or is this a situation that's going to take from me and not allow me to give my best somewhere else? Because you only have so much time, you only have so much that you can give. So by learning to distinguish between all these opportunities to give and you will, you will. And especially given your why, you got to build that muscle that keeps you focused on living your why to the fullest. You got to stay away from areas in which you can only play small and go towards the areas in which you can play full out. Your life is going to expand and you'll become even more rich and fulfilling, right? So another thing you can do if you're not able to get your things done, your goals done, is you need to make yourself the cause, make you the thing that you're giving to. So that by giving to you, you're meeting your need to give, but you're also meeting your need to succeed have a bigger impact. So make yourself the cause and that's how you can reach your goals. So let's talk about the second why. Trust. To create relationships based upon trust. To be the trusted source, to be the one that others can count on. You might hear them saying something like, you can always count on me. I'll be there for you. I'll do what I say I'll do. I'll keep your secret. I won't gossip. That's just between you and me. They're the people that you can count on to do what they say they're going to do. So the characteristics of this why? For you, trust means everything. And you believe that when relationships are based on trust, the sky is the limit. You're going to go to great lengths to demonstrate that you are trustworthy. And you'll do such things as becoming an expert in a given area so that you can show your expertise and establish that you can be trusted. You look to do things properly and correctly, because that's what a trusted person would do. Now, people with your why often like numbers. Because numbers don't lie. Two plus two is what? Yeah, it's four tomorrow. What is two plus two? It's also four, right? So numbers don't lie. If someone were to break your trust, though, it feels like a knife in the gut. And you find it almost impossible to have a relationship with them after they lose your trust. Although you tend to have fewer friends, you build loyalty and lasting friendships and relationships with those people you can trust. Right? So trust is everything to you. If you can trust them and they can trust you, the sky is the limit. There's nothing you can't do. But the key is you don't want to have someone break your trust. Now, the challenge, the biggest challenge with your why is that because trust is so important to you, you'll often go way above and beyond to prove that you are trustworthy. You will stay late, you'll work overtime. You'll go beyond what is expected to prove your trustworthiness. You may even be overly generous with either time or resources in efforts to build trust. Now, unfortunately, this extra effort often doesn't yield great results because other people don't see the world through the same filter that you do. The why of trust, you know, it's simply not that important to them. And therefore, while they may view you as a generous person, the extra effort doesn't accomplish your objective of building more trust. The other challenge that comes with this why is that you often find yourself getting let down because trust is such a big deal to you. And most People don't know that they can easily break your trust. You know, for them, maybe telling a little white lie would be a way to avoid a conversation that they didn't want to have anyways. So you find out about this little white lie and suddenly you know you can't trust them, right? If they're going to lie to me about that, what else might they lie to me about? And so that damages the relationship when that's not really what their intent was. So oftentimes you can lose relationships because people inadvertently break your trust. So the solution, given that trust is so important to you, really what you need to do is just simply communicate it clearly to all of those who you associate with. Your friends, your family, your business colleagues. It's literally a matter of just saying, look, I feel successful when I'm able to create relationships that are based upon trust. I need to know that trust is very. I need you to know that trust is very important to me and I need to know that trust is important to you. I'm the person who can be counted on to do what I say I'm going to do. Can I count on you? If I can, great. Sky's the limit. If I can't, then, then let's not go there. Let's not have this relationship now. Based on the fact that trust is so important to you, you're going to quickly identify those who resonate with this and more importantly, those who don't. So it's going to give them the opportunity to raise their hand and say, that's what I'm looking for. Or no, that's really not that important to me. So armed with this information, you can make fully informed decisions as to who you choose to associate with.

This episode of beyond your why podcast is brought to you by the WHY app. If you're wanting to find clarity for your life, make better decisions, have better relationships, build a better business, and ultimately have a greater impact on the world, then head over to why institute.com take our free WAI app. Discover your why today.

The third why is make sense, right? To make sense of things, especially if complex or challenging. So something you might hear them say is, I got it. Let me help you figure this out. Or, alright, hit me, hit me. Give me more, give me more. Okay, I got it. I know what we should do. Or I got it figured out. I know where we're going. I know what to do here. I got it solved. So if this is your why, then you're driven to solve problems and resolve challenging and complex situations. So you have this uncanny ability to take in lots and lots of data and information, observe situations and circumstances that are around you, and sort through them to create solutions. Now, typically, you can do this very, very fast. Typically, you're way ahead of everybody else. You take problems and challenges and organize them in solutions that are sensible and easy to implement. So you're often viewed as an expert because of your unique ability to find solutions quickly. You also have a gift for articulating the solutions and then summarizing them clearly and in understandable language. You believe that many people are stuck and that if they could make sense out of their situation, they could find a simple solution and move forward. In essence, what you do is you help people get unstuck and move forward. Now, there's challenges that come with this why, if you have this, why it's literally impossible for you to stop yourself from solving other people's problems. Now, sometimes this can come across as a, a smarty pants or a know it all or somebody who just doesn't listen, right? They always have an answer. They always have a solution. So many people, despite having problems that you could easily solve for them, they're not interested in your solution. They simply want you to listen. They just want to be heard. They don't want anyone to preach to them or lecture them or, or solve their issue. They just want to be heard. So if you're not careful, you can damage relationships, despite solving their problem and wanting to help. So what are the solutions? Now, the easy answer to this challenge is to not jump in with your solution. Now, you're someone who can't stop solving the problem, so you can't stop your mind from solving it, but you can stop your mouth from seeing the solution. So you need to find a way to bring it out slowly, especially if you can make it easily understandable to the other person. You know you want to solve their problem, but you want to have it be their idea. You just walk them through solving their own problem and you can take the, take pleasure in that and feel proud of your unique skill to be able to help them solve their problem. Now let's go into the fourth why, which is to find a better way and share it. Now, you might hear them saying something like, it might be better if we did it this way, or I think there's a better answer, or what if we tried this other place or that one looks better, or just simply, let's find a better way. So if this is your why, then you are the ultimate innovator, right? You constantly seek Ways to do, to improve everything. You take virtually anything and want to improve it, make it better, and then you want to share your improvements with the world. You take what's already been invented or already there, and you improve upon it as well. I mean, you're constantly asking yourself the question, what if we tried this differently? What if we did this another way? How can we make this process better? So you contribute to the world with better processes, better systems, and you operate under the motto of often pleased, never satisfied, right? You're, you're excellent at associating, which means that you can take one something from one industry and apply it to another. You're always there with the goal of improving something. So you can be in a restaurant and you can notice a process that they're doing that's working really well and say, hey, you know what? That's a better way. And you catalog that better way, and then you may be in another situation somewhere else, and you pull that out and say, you know what? I've seen a better way to do that. Let me show you what it is. So you're always helping people improve and innovate what they're already doing. Now, the challenge with this why is that? The very strength of your why also presents a distinct challenge. Because nothing is ever right because it can always be made better, right? You have a hard time choosing even what to eat at a restaurant because some choice may be on the menu might be better than the one that you took. So it's challenging for you to make a decision or pick out what even to order if you're not sure what is the best thing on the menu, right? You never leave well enough alone, and you can frustrate others, especially those who go to great lengths to create systems that work and should not be messed with. So as far as you're concerned, everything can be made better. So if you are in a situation where someone's figured it out already, they like the results they're getting, you're the person that could come in and upset them, because you want to find something that's even better than what they already have, even though they don't want that, right? So the solution, here's the solution. Realize that what better way people are looking for is good enough. What that means is that you're going to keep tinkering and you're going to keep improving until you reach the point where you're happy enough to stop, right? So if you're always trying to make things better, the question became, well, where are you going to End, where are you going to stop? Do you want to get in this perpetual circle of always having to find a better way? If that's the case, where does it end? Or will it just overtake your life? So the place that it ends for you is when it's good enough. So you're looking for good enough. But the key is to define what good enough means so that you know when you get to that endpoint and you can say, okay, that's good enough, I can leave it alone and I can move on to something else. This will keep you out of things you shouldn't improve and focus on areas where you can have a bigger impact.

Okay, the fifth why.

Right way to do things the right way. You might hear them saying something like, follow the system. It's all about results. Let's be consistent. Let's get predictable results. Let's. Let's stick with it. We know that's going to work. Let's keep doing it. Those are the kinds of things that you'll hear them say. See, because you believe if this is your why, that there's a proper and co and correct way to, to do things and that things should be done right. There's. There's really no point in skimping on the details or cutting corners. You are about results. And in order to achieve consistent results, you gotta follow processes that have been proven and you gotta use systems that have been developed and shown to work over time. You know that if you stay on the right path, you will get consistent results. You believe in being on time and sticking to a set schedule. You don't believe that you know everything or your way is always the right way or it's my way or the highway. But you believe that there is a right way to get results. And if you can just find the right path, the results are guaranteed. Now here's the challenge. If unchecked, the tendency with your why is to become somewhat rigid, right? And inflexible. The term my way or the highway, as we said, only applies to you as being the right way. Right? It's only prop. It's the only proper way to accomplish an objective. Now, obviously, this can lead to friction with people that don't see the world through your why. You know, they have a different filter and they're far more comfortable with rolling with the punches, right? They like things changing. They like trying new things out. They like thinking outside the box. That doesn't work so well with somebody who wants to keep things in the box because they know they can get good Results that way. So what's the solution? You know, much like contributors need to select the causes that enable them to create the most value and make sense. People need to moderate their problem solving skills. People with your WHY must learn to acknowledge that the right way for you may not be the right way for someone else. Right? You will always be in command of those things that are on your watch, but you want to make sure that those items are done right. However, to get along well with others, you got to respect the results without the need to be in complete command of the process. People with otherwise may have a different way to accomplish objectives that from their viewpoint is equally right. You are most often the go to person that others seek out for creation and implementation of systems, processes and procedures. When not in that role, it's important to respect and appreciate the process put forth by others. So you're the guy or gal that people need to build the processes and systems that make things work. So a better way person can find something that is better, but he needs a right way person to actually implement it and create the processes and the structures so that it does happen. So you guys are very, very valuable in business and in creating businesses. The sixth why is challenge to think differently and challenge the status quo. You might hear them saying something like I can't stand being put in a box or what box? Or who wants to be in a box? Or let's imagine extraordinary, or let's do things differently or who says we have to follow the rules?

If this is your why, then you don't believe in following the rules or drawing inside the lines. You want things to be fun and exciting and different, and you rebel against the classic way of doing things right. You typically have eccentric friends and eclectic tastes because after all, why would you want to be normal? You love to be different, think differently, and challenge virtually anyone or anything that is too conventional and typical. You want to push the envelope because it comes naturally to you. Always want to be outside the box. You always want to imagine extraordinary and you actually see a world that's different than the rest of us do. So what are the challenges that come with this why? The biggest challenge by far for those who have your why is that you're generally unaware of it and therefore don't appreciate what a unique gift you truly have. Now, other people may find you odd or strange or don't understand your behavior or your thoughts or what you're doing, but you may be viewed even as like the crazy one and ostracized because of it. You may be Excluded from gatherings or opportunities or relationships because of the way you're perceived. People don't get you right because of this. You may feel misunderstood or not valued and sometimes have a hard time getting along in typical or normal circumstances. So what's the solution? In your case, the solution is most effective but not really obvious because it requires a bit of tact. It's really imperative that you let people know about your why, about the fact that you're different, that you enjoy challenging the way things are done and coming up with innovative and novel ways of looking at things. You want to invite people to bring challenges to you that need a fresh pair of eyes or an outside the box solution. When somebody knows about your why, instead of being the weird one, you suddenly become the cool person that simply thinks differently. So it's been our experience that you know, for people who have your why, gaining that awareness that you are different, but it's a great thing and there's nothing wrong with you. And in fact, quite the opposite. That you have a rare gift that few others share has been transformational for you. Knowing your why gives you a keen, keen understanding of yourself, along with an appreciation for who you are, often for the very first time. People with this why do the most extraordinary things or they have the biggest problems doing anything. If they see their gift, their why, as a gift, then they can do amazing things. If they see their why as a curse, then they want to medicate and get away from themselves. So your why can do great things. And that's what we want to help you do. So the seventh why is to master, to seek mastery and understanding. Now, you might hear someone with this why saying something like, that's very interesting, let's explore it in greater details or I need to do some research.

Or that sure is complex. Or let's dive deeper into that, let's find out more or I want to know more about that. See if this is your why. You have an insatiable thirst for knowledge, but it really isn't like a superficial knowledge. This is exploring the depths and the intricacies of a particular subject, really to the point of being viewed as an expert in that area. I mean, you find enjoyment in just the sheer act of immersing yourself in something new, right? You're fearless when it comes to learning about new subjects or ideas, but you're often cautious with the expression of your thoughts. You love to peel back the layers of the onion and go deeper and deeper and deeper. And you like to look for subtle differences on any given subject. Short Answers to questions are a challenge for you because they don't do justice to the depth needed to understand the subject matter. You love the details. So what are the challenges that come with this? Why the biggest challenge facing those with your why is a practical one. You have a tendency to want to create a Rolls Royce when only a Volkswagen is required. The pursuit of perfection may be uncalled for or even kind of counterproductive. Somebody may want you to just give them a summary and you go in and give them a six page essay on that subject when that's not what they wanted. You're not particularly suited for like mundane tasks and you may often get in your own way looking for perfection where none is needed. You have to be cautious to keep your overactive brain out of the way of necessary chores that have to be accomplished on a certain time schedule. Sometimes good enough really is good enough. Alright, so what are the solutions? Well, while really every task has components that must get done, your challenge is to set a time frame, deliver just what is required. You know, although you really can dive deep into the depths and the intricacies and the nuances of the subject, you need to be aware when that is needed and when it's wanted. You know, if people want detail, give them detail, but if they want a summary, give them a summary and put yourself in a timeframe that will allow you to do that. You're gonna find the most happiness in positions where your intellect is constantly challenged. Challenged. You know, in these types of interactions with others, it's important to maintain your humility to avoid being perceived as kind of arrogant. Right? Your high powered brain is really a gift and you'll find more joy and fulfillment when you surprise people with it.

The eighth why is to clarify, right? To clarify or create clarity, you might hear people with this why Saying something like, so will you be arriving at 1126 or 1127 or we need to get clear on that or I don't think we're seeing eye to eye, or they'll raise their hand and say I need to ask a question or I need more clarification. So this is your why then? You seek to be fully understood at all times. Everything has to be crystal clear. Now for you, it's important to know that people get what you're saying. And you're going to go use numerous different methods to get a point across and make sure that it's clear. Right? You're going to use analogies, you're going to use metaphors to share your views in an interesting and Unique manner. You feel successful when you know with confidence that your message has been fully understood and received so that decisions can be made and people can move forward. If it's not clear, you can't move forward. You got to make it clear so that you can move forward. So the challenge your need to be clearly understood almost borders on fanatical. You know, while that can be a good thing with respect to your ability to express yourself, if you don't keep it in check, it can come across as overbearing. You may find yourself explaining something to someone for a second or third or fourth time, despite the fact that they already told you that they heard you and understand your communication. So you may have people that avoid you because they don't want to go through all the questioning and the many times that you want to explain the same thing. So what's the solution now? Because you're masterful with your ability to speak, this tends to get in the way of listening. And unfortunately, this is a skill that you've got to cultivate. Listen, verify and move on. Listen for when someone stresses that they've heard you and quickly verify that and then trust that in fact they did so that you can move on. This will allow you to not get bogged down in extensive and repetitive conversations. So find out what is needed to make it clear. Do that and move on. The ninth why is simplify to simplify. Now, you might hear someone with this why saying something like, you know, let's break it down to its essence or just give me the facts. I don't want all the extra. Just tell me straight, tell me like it is. We need to keep things simple. So this is your why. You're one of the people that makes everyone else's life easier. You are the person that breaks things down to its essence, which allows us to understand each other better and see things the same way. You're constantly looking for ways to simplify, from recipes to business systems to, you know, how you organize your garage. You feel successful when you eliminate the complexity and remove unnecessary steps. You're someone that has very few choices in their closet. Because why make it complicated when you can make it simple? Now, the challenges, the biggest challenge that you face with your why is to embrace the fact that others are quite comfortable with a lot of chaos. You know, to do this makes little sense to you, but chaos is because chaos is confusing and inefficient. You know, it adds layers of complexity that are unneeded and contributes nothing from your perspective. You have a hard time with mess and disorganization and someone giving you lots of detail. If things are complex, you can't stand it. Because when it's complex, only the person that understands that complexity can actually do anything with it. And that's not useful. So what's the solution? Well, there is no easy answer to the dilemma facing those with your why, right? Because human beings are messy by nature and they're really not prone to seeking simple solutions like you are. So really, it's just acceptance and celebration are your friends. Accept the fact that others cannot do what you do and celebrate the contribution that you make to everyone around you.

So those are the nine whys. You've got them written down. Well, you learn more about them today. And I'm sure you can see with all the nine whys, that each of those, you're part. You find yourself in each of those, right? You're a little bit of all of them. And we'll get into more detail of why you feel that way later, because everybody says that, you know, once they discover their why and they learn about the nine whys, they'll say, well, you know what? I'm part this one and I'm part this one, and I'm part this one. And the answer to that is, you're right, you are. We'll address that when we start talking about your personal why formula. But I wanted to bring these up to you now because in the next few podcasts, I'm going to bring on guests that have these whys, that have each of the nine whys, so you can see how the why has played out in their life. You'll see live examples of contribute, live examples of trust and make sense and better way and right way and challenge and mastery and clarify and simplify. So you'll see how it played out and what those people are really like, so you'll get an even deeper understanding of them. The more you can know about the nine whys, the better relationships you can have and the more understanding of yourself you'll have. So you can see where you fit, where you would be most effective, what direction you should go, how to use that to build your business. Those are the things that we're going to talk about in the upcoming podcast. So your next podcast coming up, it's going to be a really cool interview. I'm looking forward to sharing that with you. It's going to be a real good friend of mine who has the why of contribute. His name is Jamie Duraghi. He is a leadership and executive coach who, once he discovered his why his life took a completely different turn. You'll hear about it on the next podcast.