The Power of Coaching: 7 Secrets to Creating Movement in Life and Business with Aaron Velky

Welcome to beyond you'd why Podcast, where we go beyond just talking about your why and actually help you discover and then live your why. You see, we believe that knowing your why, that driving force behind every decision you make and every action you take, is the essential first step to really knowing yourself. It allows you to move forward faster and have a bigger impact. If you're already a fan of the show, then you know that every week we talk about one of the nine whys, and then we introduce you to somebody with that why so you can see how their why has played out in their life. This show will be more powerful for you if you've already discovered your why. If you still need to do that, head over to whyinstitute.com and discover your why today. It'll only take you about five minutes. Now let's meet today's guest.

This week we're going to be talking about the why of better way. So if this is your why, then you are the ultimate innovator and you're constantly seeking better ways to do everything. You find yourself wanting to improve virtually anything by finding a way to make it better. You also desire to share your improvements with the world. You constantly ask yourself questions like, what if we tried this differently? What if we did this another way? How can we make this better? You contribute to the world with better processes and systems while operating under the motto I'm often pleased but never satisfied. You're excellent at associating, which means that you're adept at taking ideas or systems from one industry or discipline and applying them to another, always with the ultimate goal of improving something. And so today I have a great guest for you. His name is Aaron Velker. He is a transformational coach on a mission to help you reach the next level and create an incredible impact in the world by solving your biggest problem. You. He's been through all the things that kept him from living the life he wanted, being his own worst enemy, believing his own excuses and not having someone to hold him accountable to. Change now. Aaron and the team at get out of your own Way coach successful entrepreneurs to a crystal clear vision and and push them to the next level of business relationships, experiences and health while elevating their ability to make an impact. Hang around Aaron for a while and you'll change from an immovable object to an unstoppable force. His podcast was ranked in the top 2.5% of worldwide shows in the first 10 days of launch, and his retreats, coaching and company programs have helped hundreds grow beyond their wildest dreams. Please welcome Aaron Velke to the podcast.

Yeah, yeah.

Where's all the drum rolls and everything else?

The audience in the backdrop just went absolutely bananas. I love it.

Well, welcome to the show, Aaron. Let's start with something real simple, like where do you live now? Yeah, just start with that.

Well, first, Gary, I'm so glad, so grateful to be here. I am now based in Scottsdale, Arizona. It is the hottest part of the summer right now, but, man, like, nine months a year, this place is incredible. Yeah.

What's the temperature today?

100. Too hot.

Yeah, it's odd. So let's go back, Aaron. Let's go back in your life. Let's start back. Where were you born? What were you like, in high school?

Oh, high school. So I was born on the east coast, just outside of dc. I spent my, basically my whole life until I moved here in that corridor of D.C. baltimore High School. You know, I'd say if I really described myself unbiasedly, I was shy. I was definitely reserved. I was. I was a hard worker and I was really interested in sports and I was really interested in art. And I was incredibly afraid to be social. I was really hard on myself. I did not believe in myself. And in. In many ways was like, soaked up by my own inner critic. I was very, very plagued by an inner critic and, and loud noises in my head that really suppressed who I was.

Let's talk about that inner critic for a second. Like, what was the inner critic saying?

Well, shit, you could probably find a negative comment and put it on a board and I'd probably be able to repeat it. You know, I didn't think I was attractive. I didn't think I was cool. I was picked on and bullied a lot from middle school and on. So I think a lot of that was like, I'm not welcome. I'm an outcast. I'm. I'm never going to fit in. I think that even plagued me in, like, academics. Like I was school, I always got and picked up really easy. But that was another reason to be outcast and picked on was being a nerd or whatever. Whatever the, the slang was or is at the moment. I think that inner critic also would ruminate on mistakes. Anytime I'd make an error, it was constantly there to remind me that I had to fix it or I needed to really get a hold of myself because it was going to happen again. And then very naturally it would happen again. And that, that really showed itself in athletics. And then there was also, I think, just given Where I was growing up, how I was growing up, there was also this, like, you're never going to get out of this. You're never going to make it. You're always going to be stuck here. And I grew up in an area that had a lot of different kinds of people, a lot of different demographics, races, economic situations. So there was just. Just a very unique environment. And I. My parents did okay, but we didn't have a lot. And I never felt like I would have the things that everyone else had, nor that I would be able to find success. I didn't really think about success at all then, but I did not feel like I could make it out of the situation I was in, that I would always just kind of be in the middle or, or I would always want for more but could never reach it.

And what kind of sports were you into?

I played soccer. That was my. My first love, man, hands down. And then outside of that, I was playing volleyball, I was playing club soccer, and I was playing club volleyball. Basically from high school all the way to college, and then college, it was soccer only.

So what part did sports play in helping you with all that? Or did.

Did. Yeah, it gave me a place. Sports. Sports gave me a place to put all that pain and all that frustration and all that. I don't know what to do with this kind of feeling. Sports gave me a very concrete road to an outcome. In school, it came easy, so I didn't have to work very hard, but in athletics I did. So it really conditioned me. Like, if I. If I want to do this, I gotta work hard. So it gave me that. When I wrapping up my high school career, I got injured and I really wanted to play in college. It was my whole dream. And that saga was probably the formation of who I am today. I. I worked so hard to heal and recover, but that just takes time. I missed all recruiting. I missed, missed the whole, like, of my senior season to this injury. And in my, like, recovery from that, I set my sights on walking on to a Division 1 program and did that. And that was after every doctor, every medical, every chiropractor was like, look, man, you're never gonna play again. Let it go. I think that experience, both through high school, learning how to work hard and learning how to put something into athletics and this, like, I'm gonna build a dream and I'm gonna find a way to get there was. Was a formating. Like, it built. It built a version of me I did not know existed. Someone that could defy what everyone said. And still get the result. And in order to do that, I had to leave all my friends behind. So it really forged like a belief in what everyone says versus what I believe internally. And I don't think I could have gotten that in academics.

Wow. So your worst experience became your best experience.

The test became the testimony. Yeah, it.

Now I look back at that because I've coached athletics and now I coach entrepreneurs and. And I think it's so easy as a human being in a world where everyone can sort of build up on negativity and stack it. Really easy. It's really difficult to hear your heart, to hear your own conscious and say, like, I'm doing this and I'm going for it and I'm going to give it everything I got. I remember my parents sat me down. They were like, what if you don't make it? My mom was really conscious of like, you know, I know you're going for this and I know you want it. Like, I was working so hard, I. Day after day after day, hour after hour, just honing this craft. And I remember her sitting down and saying, look, it's possible that you won't make the team. And. And I didn't know what that would feel like. But I knew that if I didn't try, something in me would die. And I don't know how I knew that. But there was an internal feeling of, if I don't go after this, there is a fire in me that will always be extinguished. And I watched this, I've seen it now countless times where you believe in something and you just listen to everyone saying, hey, the odds are low, you'll never make it. It's hard to run a business, it's hard to build a dream, it's hard to make an impact, whatever it is. But those stories I'm really proud of at that point in my life, those stories were more silent than this. This passion that I had for it.

So off to college you go. Where did you go to college?

A school in Baltimore called University of Maryland, Baltimore County. Sort of a. A different school than the louder, more pronounced University of Maryland and College Park. It was smaller. Probably better for me just socially to. To leave what I knew and also go to a school that was, I don't know, 15,000 people versus 35, 40,000 people. Really well known for academics and engineering, which is what I went to initially. And a smaller campus, like, I mean the whole campus fit in like a two mile circle. So really tiny one in many contexts. But a great school with a Great Leader Freeman HBowski had built a real brand out of that school. My degree, even though I don't technically use it, is probably still appreciating, so, great choice. But, man, it was. It was definitely off a beaten path.

So take us through your first day of soccer practice for.

Your first.

Well, my. My whole. My whole way in was, hey, can. Can I have a chance? To the coach, I have a chance. Can I have a chance? Can I have a chance? So it was after the fall season of my first year. So it had been springtime, maybe like, winter spring. And I was training with the team. And at. At this point, like, I'm heralding these guys, right? These guys are already playing. They got the cool swag. They got all this stuff on. And I'm like, man, you guys are. You're already there, and I'm on the outside, right? This goes back to the high school belief of being an outcast. I. I knew that, like, I. I never had elite coaches. I never had big training programs. No one had ever trained me one on one. Like, I didn't. I didn't have any of that. So I knew the only thing that would get me there was work. So I had to be fitter. I had to be stronger. I had to be just a hustler in a way to. To make any kind of dent. And I remember walking up that first day so nervous, so afraid. You know, it was. It was like a fitness test day. And I. I was at least like, all right, I can do this part. And.

It was very clear that I was not a part of the group. It was so obvious to everybody that I was not a part of the group, that I came from a different place, that I. I didn't have the same kind of. Of training and history and background. But one thing. I have been very proud of myself throughout the. The entire saga of my life has been stepping into those situations. Even if I'm afraid, we do it afraid. If I'm scared, we do it scared. And. And that has just been a. A model for everything. If I'm on stage in front of a hundred people, and I'm scared, I'm still going to do it. So that moment was another big sort of build Aaron identity piece of, okay, I don't fit in here. We're still going to go. And it was a. It was a long day, let's put it that way. It was a long workout.

How did you do against these guys that have been training for all this?

I. I think my work ethic was obvious over Especially the. The first couple months, my work ethic was obvious.

Was clear that there was a skill gap, but my. My work was slowly closing, that I think I did a good job of knowing my place and knowing my role. I didn't come in loud or boisterous. I knew I had a lot to work for. I did all the things that, you know, we hear about when we think about athletics and sort of these underdog strategies, like get there first, leave last, clean up the cones, pick up the stuff. I would help the guys that were training. In fact, one of them lives just so happens to live, like two miles away from me now. So we connected. I used to go train with him and just. I would just help him train.

And the process of trying out was so long. It was like the entire spring season. Three months, three and a half months. Then it was summer, then it was like, come back for the fall season. You know, we're gonna. We're gonna see it out. And I was just in limbo for so long of like, am I in or am I out? I'm not sure. But the. There were five of us that. That tried to walk on. Two didn't make it past the first couple weeks. The third didn't make it past the spring. And the. The other guy and myself remain friends to this day because we were the two that passed through. And, you know that. I think after a while, what made it very clear that you couldn't say no to me was that my fitness was just about better than everybody else. So if nothing else, I was just a good training dummy and I was learning fast. But, I mean, These guys had 10 years, 12 years, sometimes 20 years, maybe not quite 20, 18 years of like, like, heavy, good, quality professional training. And I had, like three hours of it, so I had a lot to make up for. But it was when we would do fitness challenges, I knew, like, I gotta be first, and I gotta be first by, like, 30 seconds, not like, three. So we would do these fitness tests that constantly forced me to. To, like, push and push and push, and I would just. I would just have to crush everybody when it came to fitness. And that's kind of what I got known for really fast.

Wow, okay, so you made the team after your, what, first year? And then did you get to get in games? Did it take a while to get into a game or how did that go for you?

It took a while. You know, I think there was a long skill gap. The coach did a great job of giving me some opportunities, so I got out of he got in here, there and you know, I'd make my mark. I scored in a game against Navy down at the stadium in Annapolis, which was great. And that was a big moment because I think that was really the first season that I was involved.

So I had a couple moments, you know, I also had a couple moments where I got in game and I made like an error that still haunts me to this day. Like, you know, I, I think what I lacked at the time was real awareness of, of what was happening. I lacked the like experience that other players had coming from bigger clubs and, and more than that, like my mindset was I'm just going to out hustle you. Well, I would just end up like sprinting all the time and that, that doesn't work in soccer. And I was, I was just, I wasn't able to enjoy play and I, and I wasn't very fluid. I was just working hard and my lack of experience started to show really quick and, and I'm grateful for the minutes that I got. But looking back, my mindset was nowhere near ready to compete there. And, and just in that style I, I also think that my style of play does not match the American college system. I play more like a Spaniard and not like that 11 on 11 aside, like hit and run style. So it was just a mismatch. But what I got from that and what very much influences me today can never take back. I learned so much more about me, about life, about athletics, about mentality and mindset in those couple of years and I didn't know it, I didn't know what I was going through. I was just frustrated that I wasn't getting the, the title and time that I wanted. But still a life changing experience, hands down.

So now back to the school part. What was your de, what were you getting?

So I went in for engineering. I was good at math and science, so high school was just like go do it. Kept falling asleep in engineering classes and physics classes. I think more of that was the professor. When, when I officially got invited to the team, they told me like, hey, if you're going to make the team, you gotta have another credit. You need like one more credit to be able to play. And I took an accounting class over the summer at like a local community college. And because I had done such elite math, accounting was like mathematically a piece of cake. And no one had ever connected math and money for me. So I was like, okay, I'm done with this engineering thing. So I, I switched my major after my first year. Into financial economics and still not entirely sure what that means, but it was basically like learn how to manage a business. Learn how to, you know, run numbers and, and understand the, the backdrop of cost of goods sold and management fees and all this econometrics. But most of my career, most of my career in, in college was taking finance related classes in some regard business. I did a lot of psychology and philosophy because I believed that that was important to business and marketing. I did some creative writing, but my major still to this day I have no idea what financial economics actually means.

Well, at least you got it right. So you graduate from college, what was your next step?

I graduated in 09. So about the time that I was graduating, two things were, were really circumstantially happening. My parents, my dad ran a demolition company. My mom was a big part of running that. And in 2009 the entire industry of construction, demolition, rehabs, rehauls, commercial building optimization was just collapsing. So their business starts to go down. I start to look at finance jobs and finance jobs were crumbling as well. So I was pretty handsy. He taught me how to, how to do anything I could like build anything at home. I was hanging sheetrock at 6. So I went into apartment maintenance, which I was doing my senior year of school to pay for my extracurriculars. And.

I go into this maintenance job full time about 20 minutes north of the school. So I was still close to home. But I basically went into a dirty job. You know, I was fixing and repairing and cleaning and doing all this for a, a college off campus housing property. So I basically went from college off campus housing to college off campus housing. And instead of being like the cool D1 athlete that's like crushing it in school, I was now the janitor. I was now the maintenance guy. I was now the whatever it was they thought I was was not where I came from. But.

It was an unbelievable deal. So I got 45 grand a year compared to like the finance jobs they offer me were like 25 grand a year, 30 grand a year, and I got a free apartment, no cable, no rent, no utilities, no nothing. So I actually made 45 grand a year and dirty job. Definitely not something I, I regret. But something I struggled with was like the identity of like, oh man, I, I'm, I'm uncool again. I went back to being super outcast again. And people would talk to me like I was, I was dirt. You know, hey, like fix this. So I had to really eat my humble pie. And I don't think Any of them or not many of them knew that I had just come from a four year degree, that I had this business background in financial economics, that I was an athlete. Like none of them knew. So it was, it was a big slice of humble pie. But it also teed me up for, for like finance and, and figuring out my money a little bit better. I was also sending money home to parents, like right away to help them figure their stuff out. So, like, as a family, we just went through a lot around that time. And I think that dirty job really set me up really well for my future today.

Okay, so how long did you do that? And then what was your next step?

Let's see, a year and a half of that. And I got into management. Another year there and I started coaching soccer on the side. So I was doing this management job and I started coaching soccer then with a relatively new club. While I'm doing both of these things, I'm learning how to run a business. I'm learning how to manage an apartment complex. I'm learning the numbers, the math behind it, the business model. I'm learning all those things. I'm going to workshops and conferences and, and starting to really catch my feet for who I am. And then I'm learning how to build practice sequence, learn training models, design experiences that are teaching skills to people all around the game that I love the most. So I also learned for the first time how to get paid to do something I love. And that was like a big light bulb moment for me to understand that someone would pay me money and I would do it for free.

That's awesome. And so what got you back into coaching?

Man, I just gone through, like a bad breakup. I was, I was playing pool and having beer too many nights a week for me to feel like I was moving my life forward. I actually found this the other day. My mom brought it out when she was here. I wrote a contract to myself. It was kind of the beginning of what I now think was my personal development journey. Wrote a contract to myself and I, I, it was half a sheet big. My, one of my associates signed it and it was, look, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do coaching for as long as I possibly can. If I, if I can make that happen, I'm gonna take the gmat, sign up for an MBA if, if work will pay for it. They decided not to do that. I'm gonna write a movie, I'm gonna get incredibly fit and sign up to do these fitness challenges. And I'm gonna learn how to how to to grow. So I'm going to read a book every month for the next 12 months and like that was the first time I'd ever really done something like that. Subsequently I've done something like that since that point. And I was, that was 12, almost 14 years ago. Wow.

Okay, so you make the contract, you, your coaching and you're also the running apartment complex. So what was your next step after that? Take us on your journey.

Apartment complexes got old fast. I was pretty cornered there. So I ended up at a new property downtown in Baltimore. I took a real quick setback financially and with my role and then immediately took a big step up because that I like couldn't transition horizontally. So I took a step down and then that person left so I could step right back up. Worked out very well in my favor. While I'm at the apartment complex, I'm starting to get a feel for an area of Baltimore that is being flooded with political agendas, gentrified initiatives, money.

Commercial properties.

Like just a lot was happening in this area. So I start to get plugged into like things are happening locally. I could get involved. I'm coaching more. I'm starting to get better and better at coaching. I'm running better and better teams. I'm watching families respond as I step into to lead coaching my way because I've got a little bit of credibility. And about that time I start to see trends in what's happening in the coaching world. So a buddy and I start to put together an idea and a concept for a nonprofit to teach kids about money. And within a 12 month period I'm now working full time at this new apartment complex and really building out the system that they still use to this day. And that was 10 years ago. I was coaching, coaching often infrequently doing personal training, one on one stuff on the side and starting to build this non profit out. I'm trying everything I possibly can to make money and slowly I'm starting to drift towards coaching a nonprofit and doing less and less work. I could do the 40 hour a week job by, by 2014 I could do my 40 hours a week in 12 doing community events. I'm running stuff, I'm connecting nonprofit threads, I'm looking for grants. I'm coaching during the weekends and nights. I'm trying to build the soccer club up from the back end and build systems there. So I'm doing everything like I worked so much in 2015 I quit my job and very quickly the non profit starts to expand. I'm teaching People and kids, money. And I am coaching at night. So really, my. My. My world of building a business was supported by my coaching of soccer.

And now, you know, the reason you took financial economics.

And then I knew. And in a way, dude, I think. I think the funny part is, like, what. What we ended up building was kind of like, man, I really wish this would have been in college because. Because financial economics was like, here's how you manage a business. But it wasn't like, here's how you manage your money, which I still don't understand to this day. How we don't. We don't teach this in elementary school, middle school, high school, or college. Like, I don't get that.

Well, so then you're. So you're doing lots of coaching at this time, and then did that get you into the business coaching aspect as well? Or how did you get to where you are today?

The nonprofit grew. We were featured in, you know, Baltimore Press and DC Press went on the news down at WUSA9, we started to get a lot of attention, started to raise some capital. We eventually transitioned out of nonprofit into a C corp and raised some venture money. So, like, that. That side is growing on the soccer side. Like, the soccer club is getting a lot of attention. The teams that I were coaching were growing. I'm doing more and more. I started coaching for a high school program. So, like, both of my worlds are growing, but they're all around kids. So, like, I'm. I'm around kids all the time, middle school and high school kids. Money club starts growing, coaching starts growing, and what happens is entrepreneurs start seeing what's going on in my. In my social media world, I'm teaching people how to use credit to travel the world for free. Like, my world just starts to slowly bubble, and entrepreneurs are like, hey, Aaron, how. How are you building something that makes you happy? I don't understand. Like, I have a business that's doing really well, but I. I don't like it. Like, this real estate thing is. Is great, but only for the money. It's not really what I love or, you know, I'm. I'm stuck in a job that I hate. How did you build happy? Because you look happy, you look content, and you get to work with kids all the time, man. Like, what the heck did you do? And the first person that ever signed up for coaching was an artist. She had seen I had done some. Some art on the side. I'd sold a couple paintings and things, like, in my random hours of freeness. And she's like, how do I build a business out of my art? So we took all these principles that I was designing and learning from building and growing a business and said, look, let's help you go. And from there, that was probably 20. That had to be like 2016, maybe 2017. Like, my world just started to change a lot where, where now I'm doing all three of these things at once. Coaching soccer. I'm starting to coach people that want to build a lifestyle and a business at the same time. And I'm teaching kids about money. And, and it doesn't seem like those things are all connected, but the through line was essentially the conversation about why, like, I, I think there's a better way to live a life, and I think there's a better way to go about making money. And I think if I, if I have to go to work every day and like sit in this room and, and just over and over and over do the same thing every day, every year, all this, like, well, I'll just go figure out how to make the same money at that goal. At that point in my life, it wasn't about like making more money. It was just, if I can make the same money doing what I love, why would I not? And that starts to spread. We start teaching it to kids. Hey, here's how entrepreneurship works. Here's how money works so you can be free. We start working with entrepreneurs on that. And then in, in a way, you know, a lot of the, the soccer coaching I was doing, I only coached girls after my first year was to help these young women understand that, like, they had something to them. They were powerful. They were, they were capable, and they were bigger than soccer. That no matter how good they were at soccer or bad they were at soccer, that was not the defining metric of their future. It wasn't their lid. They could do way more than anything they imagined. So it was a really connective time in my life where I was just the biggest belief and support for a lot of young adults.

And then, okay, so as you're coaching and growing and building these different businesses.

You started to work more with entrepreneurs.

Yeah, it, it pivoted pretty quickly. It grew pretty quickly. 2020, I. I retired from coaching soccer and published a book on that, transitioned to coaching higher level entrepreneurs and putting on workshops and retreats. I've been doing that sort of on the side for a while. By 2022, Money Club and my coaching company at the time needed to, to be let go of. So I let go of those. And then the company that I've got now, get out of your own way was really a, a formation of, of like moving to Phoenix, starting life over, becoming a dad like it was. It's very fitting that I landed in Phoenix. It felt like everything in my life burned and I was starting over and I'd had to. I've had to rise from the ashes. And since then, all of the coaching I've done since 2012, 20, probably 2011 with athletics, all the coaching I've done with entrepreneurs, with artists, with businesses, all the business that I've built, all of the success that we've had, all the marketing we've done, all summates in now what we help entrepreneurs do. Everything that I went through, I went through in many ways alone. And now we just make sure that entrepreneurs go through this next level iteration without feeling the kind of aloneness that I experienced.

So what do you see.

Aaron, as the reason for your success.

And the reason for the things imploding?

Well, I actually think they're the same. There's a. There's a courage that is trying. There's a courage that is attempting something that is outside my scope. So the success has come from I'm doing something outside of what I know. I'm regularly building an experience that I have no experience with. And now I know this. I've never sold anything I've had, like, I'll just build it as I go and learn it as I go. And that process comes with its own risk, but it also has created the most upside reward. So the attempt has been the reason for success. I'm attempting something I've never done and I'm relentless when it comes to failing. That has also been the cost. It's also been the implosion. Like, I've never done this. It's not going to go well. Or maybe it's going to take me seven attempts and it. Maybe I can't sustain it for seven. But it all goes back to the same principle when I was walking onto this college team. Like, I don't have the same kind of chops. I didn't go to an Ivy League school. I don't have history of working with entrepreneurs and seeing how it works. I'm just going to outwork you. And, and I think that the middle ground that is like between success and implosion is actually like the most mundane. I don't want to do it, but I have to do it kind of attitude. You just, you just have to take more steps. And I've taken way more swings at like a Bad pitch, good pitch, medium pitch than most people ever have.

How do you feel about building versus maintaining?

I don't like maintaining. I really don't. But I know the importance of it. So it's a team function. I think it's important for me and just the core of who I am to constantly be riding the edge of building and knowing the cost of that, having somebody underneath behind me that can really hold the fort down.

Most of my, like, favorite memories have been involving a business partner that could hold down the fort to two builders that are sending it. They don't match well now, and I've learned this from good and bad partnerships. Now. I know that, like, I'm going to build, and that's just my natural energy. I need someone to hold down maintenance because that. That just ain't me.

Yeah. It's interesting that.

You know, I have your same why. So people with a why of better way were great at building things, but the idea of maintaining it is not so much fun. And so that's where we don't really necessarily make good CEOs.

Yeah.

Ultimately, we got to be chairman of the board and have somebody else that is. Is good at maintaining take over.

Yeah. Well said. Yeah. You know, I've had conversations with my integrator about, like, our. Our org chart. And our org chart is we kind of designed it like an hourglass, and he's at the middle. And that sort of means I'm the product, I'm the the service, I'm the delivery agent. I'm great at what I do. And also, I'm not great at many things. And I've had to learn how to get out of my own way to let him do that. So I fully agree that many CEOs need to get out of their own way and just acknowledge that they're great at.

Going forward, but they are not good at holding it down.

Yeah. And so who do you. Ideally, who would be your ideal client? Somebody that would connect the best with you, Somebody that you're looking to work with?

Well, there's usually a couple different problems that people have. I used to coach from the lens of like, hey, here are the things that you want. We're aligned now. It's much more organized around here are the problems that you're probably experiencing. So, number one is a person, a business owner that is feeling stuck or plateaued. They've run out of dream. Maybe they. That's because they've hit their dream and they just don't know what is next or ahead. But usually those Individuals are looking for a better way. They're looking for like, how can I live better? I'm, I'm stuck somewhere. The second is someone that has had a lopsided win that maybe puts them out of work. They sell their business, or someone comes in and gives them six months off, they take a big break. But someone that doesn't know who they are anymore, they have not crafted a vision that allows them to see beyond what their current level is. So they, they might think they want to hit the next level, they might be afraid of it, who knows? But usually they don't have a next level clear. It's kind of foggy and murky. The third would be somebody that has recognized that no matter how far they have come in business, they are not happy, they are not fulfilled, and they're not making an impact. And while they may never have been aware that those are drivers for them, they are probably becoming aware that without those things, their, their rocket ship is slowly running out of fuel faster than they can refill it. And no matter how many vacations they take, there is a giant gaping hole in their, their like tank for no fulfillment, no impact, and really no fun. So those three problems are, they're subtle. Oh, they're not very loud, because you got to get to a certain level of success to even feel those problems. But when business owners finally get there, whether they've made their first 5 million, they got a $7 million a year business, they've got $20 million of an exit coming up. It doesn't matter what the quantity is. It's a quality of life that's starting to bleed. So I'm the guy you call when you've run out of future.

And so what do you do for them?

Essentially, I'm a big believer that two things have to happen for entrepreneurs to move forward in predicaments like this. The first is you need a very powerful vision. So we work really diligently to formulate a vision. It's a process that we take them through. And that vision has to be bigger than business. When, when most entrepreneurs start business is their whole identity. So we rip that open and expand it to a really high level. The second thing that we do is we give them a degree of clarity that they've never had before. And clarity I never think of as addition clarity. Our definition of, of clarity is the removal of undesirable options. So what we start doing is we build this big, big, big, big, big vision. Simultaneously. We start cut, cut, cutting from the bottom, and it creates this unique mobility right division pulls us up, but our anchors hold us down, and usually we're stuck in the tension. So with. With really prolific people that are. They're like just engines, but they have become an immovable object. It's because they're stuck in the tension of, like, vision's big, but I'm afraid to cut. So we start cutting at the same time that we're building, and all of a sudden, we see a lot of escalation.

I love it. And it's so interesting, Aaron, because you just went through your why, how, and what.

I know. It's so wild because we did that, like, a week after we built out this whole formula. And, yeah, it was like, oh, that makes. Oh, that's our product. That's our service.

So for those of you listening, Aaron's why is to find a better way and share it. How he does that is by making things clear and understandable. And then ultimately, what he brings is a way to have a bigger impact or help others have a bigger impact. And so you just exactly said that, you know, first step is we got to have a better vision. Step two is we got to get clear. Step three, we got to have bigger impact. So wild, and which is why somebody would choose you. I'm looking for a better way. If I need clarity and I want to have a bigger impact with my life, Aaron's the guy. That's what he does, man.

Right up. You know, Gary, I think there's another There. There's, like a layer that we're all kind of searching for. For bigger. And one of the. The lies that we tell ourselves is like, I'll do it when I get there.

And.

And what I love to do and what we love to do, because our team is just so good, is we. We love to help people. Say, what's the thing you would do when you get there? Let's say you sell the business for $20 million, $10 million, whatever. What would you do then?

And.

And the thing that we hear is the most spectacular and beautiful thing, because then we hear the truth about what people want. I want to volunteer. I want to build a school. I want to write a book. I want to start a podcast. I want to go speak to middle school kids and tell them what it's like to. To, like, recover from being bullied, like, whatever that is. But that can't wait. That's playing big to do that now. So we. We, like, merge these things together and get them done in a way that, like, you don't have to make these separate, we work with a veteran who's got a, a great custom home building company and he's simultaneously building the veteran organization that makes a dent. We work with individuals who are like dead set on like, I got to sell this company before I can go speak to my high school. We're like, no, no, you're going to go speak to your high school in the next six weeks. Let's start working on that. And I think there's just a time displacement that really is what Impact is about. So it's crazy that those three things are literally our formula for change. It's also my formula for how I live my life.

So when you were back in college and you saw what coaching could do for somebody.

I mean, what was the motivation for you to coach? Because you've coached a long time, right? You've coached at different levels, different sports, different, lots of different ways. And it's in you.

It is. Yeah. Well, I, I had, I had multitudes of coaches and not all of them were impressionable, but the ones that were changed everything for me. I think that every person needs one human being that believes in them that's not in their immediate sphere. Not their mom, not their dad, but they need someone that can, can look at them, look them in the eyes and say like, no, I'm not going to tolerate this. You're capable of more. And in some ways it's about like, hey, you're enough. Because I've struggled with the idea of like being enough, but also I can do better. And when you have someone do that, there is a, there's a fire that you can endure. There's a fire that I know I can endure that I've not yet seen in myself, but someone else can see it. And what I really have believed in from athletics and working with 12 year old young women or girls just about ready to go to college or artists or entrepreneurs or eight figure guys is that we had these ideas and we had this, this like, I think it's possible but. And I'm the guy that loves to stand in for somebody because I remember what it was like to have that, that but that, that the comma and whatever is coming after the but, you know, is going to be a negative. Stand in and say put a punctuation mark that's different at the end of what you want and just say it, I think I can go make a difference in the world. No, no, but, no, but I don't have the money yet. No, but I don't have the time. No, but the team's not in place. We're going to go do it, and we're going to go do it together. Because in a, in a way, the coaches that changed my life were not there long. They were just there strong. And my role and responsibility is not to be in somebody's life forever. It's not. It's to be there in a season that no one else would know how to get them through. And once they get through that season, they can do great things.

I love it. How would you define the word coach?

I love this question, man. A coach is. They have one responsibility, and it's to make movement. One responsibility. Make movement. Doesn't matter what the game is, doesn't what the sport is, doesn't matter what the, the business is. My job is to make sure you move. You are not allowed to stand still here. You don't even have to get it right or pick the right direction or know the right option. You just cannot stay still. And I think good coaches force movement. Whether it's an athlete that's like, man, I, I don't know if I'm ready for the next level, or, like, I don't know how to perfect this move, or I don't know how to complete this skill, or it's a business owner that's like, you know what? I, I, I really think we should rebuild everything. But I am terrified. If I'm here, I'm going to stand so close to you that you have two options. You can either run towards the vision that we create, or I'm going to set your chair on fire. Either way, you're moving.

I love it. All right, Aaron, last question. What's the best piece of advice you've ever been given or the best piece of advice you've ever given?

Well, the best piece, I'll go. The best piece of advice I've, I've been given. I, I give advice for a living, but I think that it's really relevant to a lot of people. There's a.

There'S a poem that starts with, Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. And you can look up the poem, just Google that. The rest of it will show up. But the best piece of advice I got was from a mentor. She was a really prolific artist. Her name was Carol Michaels. She, she then published a bunch of books on how artists can make money. Did very well for herself. I, I need to call her. She's probably still in Barcelona. But what she said was, aaron, nobody benefits from you shrinking.

Nobody wins when you Play small.

And nobody wins when you hide.

So every time I talk to you, I want to know about how you're expanding. I want to know how you're growing and I want to know how you're shining. And I think, man, like at that point in my life, I was so afraid. I was so afraid to like, stand out. I was so afraid to like, put my heart out there. I was so afraid to like take a stand for what I believed in. Now I get paid to say the thing that nobody else will say. And that really comes from this idea that like.

Most of the people that have come into my world as a coach now today aspire to mimic something about me and about what our brand stands for. And that only comes if I live up to that advice. So that is, that is like daily reminder kind of advice.

That's awesome.

I love that one.

And I know the quote you're talking about from. I'm trying to think of her name. She ran for president.

Yeah, but it's like Marianne or something.

Yeah, Marianne. Gosh. I'm sure the listeners know who we're.

Talking about, but got you.

That's a great quote. And.

Aaron, thank you so much for being here today. It's awesome to hear your story. I mean, I just get it. I know we have the same why so of course I would. But thanks for sharing your wisdom. Thanks for being here. And if people are looking to get a hold of you, they want to work with you, they want to follow you, they want to learn more from you, what's the best way for them.

To connect with you? Two easy places on social. I thankfully have a very unique name so you can find me on just about any social platform with my name. And Aaron A A R O N velky V as in victory E L K Y so find me on Instagram, give me a follow there. We share everything that we can content wise through Instagram, Facebook and YouTube. So you can also check me on YouTube if you want to get connected. You can always just send me a DM there. I think the approachability of those platforms is really important. But if you really want to go the formal route, check out the website, just go to Aaron Velke.com it'll, it'll plug you straight in to get out of your own way and you can book a call, you can learn about what we do. You can check out the stories of people who have been through our program. Though most of I think because we work with very high profile men and women, most of our stories stay rather underneath the radar, but you can still learn a little bit about us there.

Awesome. Aaron, thanks again for being here today.

Thanks for having me.

I really hope you enjoyed today's episode and that through today's guest, you heard how important it is to know your why and how impactful it can be in your life and the lives of those around you. Be sure to head over to why institute.com and discover your why today. Remember, the more you know about yourself, the more you'll know about others. I'm Dr. Gary Sanchez, and I'll see you on the next episode.