Breaking Free from Traditional Success | Discover Your Unique Path Now

I wanted to be really successful, but not just to like get shoes. I knew I wanted to make money because I wanted to make a difference. Listen to your gut and your heart, because no matter what any expert tells you, your wisdom inside needs to be paramount. When I was bartending, I was fully bartending. Like, I wasn't talking to myself about, oh my God, I should be dancing right now, or I should be working on my coaching practice. While I was growing my personal coaching practice, I kept feeling conflicted because I didn't want to just be one thing.

Are you guys here because you want Do you want to be mediocre? Mediocre sucks, does it not?

Don't get taken over by the world's definition of success. It's like everything that I've learned and I've been able to do in my business, we never know what's gonna work. You should just engage and experience and actually get your foot in the industry. That can inform whether or not you should move ahead. I have been this way, meaning goofy, silly, since I was very, very little. You walk around your day and you're like, wow, I have so many things to do. And I'm like, wait a minute. This is all awesome stuff to do.

She's an American life coach, motivational speaker, author, and YouTuber. She's the owner and creator of Marie Forleo International, B-School, and MarieTV. Forbes.com listed her website as one of the top 100 websites for entrepreneurs. She's Marie Forleo, and here are her top 10 rules for success.

You know, my first gig out of college was on Wall Street on the New York Stock Exchange. This is pre— This is pre-everything. This is like just out of college, 21 years I knew one of my drives, I wanted to be really successful, but not just to like get shoes. I knew I wanted to make money because I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to be able to take care of my family. I wanted to be able to contribute to causes that I believe in. And so I knew in order to do that, in my own mind, I was like, well, I want to make a lot of money and make this stuff happen. But when I was on Wall Street, even though so many people that I worked with multi, multi-millionaires, I mean, the money was ridiculous, while they were financially rich, they were spiritually bankrupt. And I felt like there was a part of me that was dying inside, and I said, this is not my path. I don't know what my path is, but I need to leave this because I feel sick. And so I think many people feel like that. You can find yourself in job and job and job, and you wanna do a really, you wanna do great work in the world, you're giving it your best, Some little voice inside is saying, "This isn't me. This isn't me." I kept having that voice until finally I left the corporate world and started my own business. Listen to your gut and your heart because no matter what any expert tells you, your wisdom inside needs to be paramount. It needs to always drive all of your decisions. Even when I was first starting out and I would pay attention to people that absolutely knew what they were doing. Completely ethical, they were smart, they were good teachers as well, sometimes their advice just didn't sit right with me. And if I wasn't as secure in my own inner voice, I might have gone down paths that wouldn't have been that great. So I think it's wonderful to get an education, it's wonderful to take in experiences, but never, ever, ever listen to anything other than what is the true voice within you. And that takes practice. When I was bartending, I was fully bartending. Like, I wasn't talking to myself about, oh my God, I should be dancing right now, or I should be working on my coaching practice. I was just really into to bartending. And when I was dancing, I was like, you know, being the best hip-hop teacher, dancer I could possibly be. When I was being a coach, same kind of thing. And I think that practice of being fully engaged in the thing that you're doing conserves a ton of energy, and that's what most people don't do. Part of what was also challenging for me when I was starting off as a coach was recognizing the truth that I didn't just want to be a coach. I loved writing. I loved hip-hop, I loved dance, I loved fitness. There were all these different things that I was passionate about. And while I was growing my personal coaching practice, I kept feeling conflicted because I didn't want to just be one thing. Has anyone ever felt that way?

Yeah.

So I would listen to the voices in my head, which were like— and basically the voices in my head were so trained by traditional wisdom and traditional thoughts about you have to pick a niche, you have to narrow down, you have to choose one thing and be good for it. Be really good at it and that's how you'll be known. And when I realized that that voice wasn't the voice I should listen to, that there was this truth that I was this multi-passionate person and that living in the present moment, which Eckhart teaches, was all about really listening to your own inner guidance and being in the here and now and not stressing so much up here, that really opened the door for me to say, you know what? Screw it. I'm gonna go take dance classes. I'm gonna go learn about this. I'm gonna do all these different things. And it— that training to be in the moment and to listen to my own inner guidance allowed me to disconnect from all the BS voices in my head that were torturing me. Torturing me.

How would you behave if you were the best in the world at what you do? How would that change what time you wake up in the morning? How would that change the food you put in your body? How would that change the people you hang out with? How you spend your time throughout the day? What websites you visit? Whether or not you work from a schedule? If you were world-class and the best in the world at what you do, how would your behavior change? It's a really interesting question that I started asking myself a few years ago, and I will tell you, it has changed everything. It's one of those singular questions, whether you put it on your screensaver you have a little reminder on your cell phone, you have it on the top of a notebook, I guarantee you if you start looking at your world through this lens, it's gonna shift everything. Now let me ask you this, just to back this up a little bit more. Are you guys here because you wanna be mediocre? No. Mediocre sucks, does it not?

Yes.

We wanna be world-class, we wanna be the best. And let me ask you this. Who's in charge of you being the best in the world? Yes. Can I hear an I am? A little louder.

One more.

Amen. And it's not even a Sunday. Okay, good.

You had to give someone who's recently graduating from our program a piece of advice.

What would you say? I would say to learn and to execute on your unique vision, define success for yourself. Figure out what that means to you. Don't get taken over by the world's definition of success or your family's or what your friends are doing or what anyone says that equals success. Once you can get clear on that vision, then you need to create a plan to make that come to life and to prioritize. I think one of the biggest tragedies of our time is I hear so many people from every walk of life, health coaches all over, feeling so overwhelmed and overworked worked and there's so much that they can do that they feel paralyzed. Well, I don't know what to do first or what, how do I make all of this happen? And I think that we all need to take a few steps back and start to get clear on our own vision for success and then actually prioritize making that come to life because then it gives you such clarity and such freedom and all of that static and the overwhelm starts to fall away.

What if I actually follow my heart and I don't make a living at it and all my friends say, you suck, see, I told you so. Eckhart actually talked about when he was moving once, his parents said, "Really?

You're gonna do this again?" Like, they've seen him as a failure for years, and then anyways, but there's always that voice that's like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, but you might just really fail." Yeah, and you know, I think all of us have that, and there's perhaps some of them, like a myth that many of us can think, especially when we're first starting out, that successful people don't have the voice anymore. That's total crap. Anyone that you've ever seen, anyone that I've encountered, and I've had the opportunity to interview a lot of people and talk to them, no matter how successful, how accomplished, how well-known, they still have those voices of self-doubt. They still get afraid. They still question, am I going in the right direction? What's next for me? And I think the more that we can recognize that that voice of basically you suck is universal, and we can disengage from that and actually engage with what we want in our lives, the happier we're gonna be. And this is the other thing: none of us know. It's like everything that I've learned and I've been able to do in my business, we never know what's gonna work. We treat every single thing as an experiment. That's the only way that you learn. I think 99% of what each of us need to do to learn and grow, not only as business people but also as human beings, if we're gonna grow, it means that we've never done that before. It's gonna be uncomfortable. And to be okay in that uncertainty and that discomfort is where the juice of life lives. I really went into pursuing different passions with eyes wide open, meaning knowing because my focus was split, I probably wouldn't be getting very far in any of them, but I made a conscious choice that I just wanted to experience them. I wanted to understand them from the inside out. I spent so much time thinking in my mind is this the right choice for me? Is this the right career for me? Should I try and build a business around this? And I said, that's such a dumb way to go around it. Like, you should just engage and experience and actually get your foot in the industry. That can inform whether or not you should move ahead. About someone who's stuck or struggling, what would you tell them? Stuck or struggling is, is typically someone who is more engaged in their thoughts than actually taking action. So it's a really interesting subtle shift, but if you catch yourself complaining like, "Oh, I'm so stuck," stop. Write an email, make a call, take a step, and the more you actually do that and catch yourself— we actually— sorry, this is me ADD. My toes are exactly that color. Awesome. I love it. Bing! But it is. It's really a practice of checking in with yourself. You've got to check yourself before you wreck yourself. Stop complaining. Stop talking to yourself in your head. Do something. I have been this way, meaning goofy, silly, since I was very, very little. And when I first started my coaching practice when I was 23, I tried to be what I thought in my mind was a businesswoman. I had this idea of like a power suit and some like big old shoulder pads, and I would speak in a certain way. And I remember trying to do that, and I felt horrible. Like, I felt I felt so stunted. It was like I had writer's block. I had speaker's block. I just felt like I was in somebody else's skin, and it was so painful for me that I was just like, I can't do this, but I really want to do this thing. I'm gonna let go of my idea of who I think I should be and talk about the fact I'm from Jersey. I don't use proper language all the time. I have kind of a weird sense of humor. I love zombies, Smurfs, all kinds of things. And what would happen if I actually just to express that. And something funny actually did happen is not only did I find myself to be more creative, I found myself more fulfilled and people actually connected with me more. I didn't feel like I had to push myself out into the world. It was more like things started to come to me. And I didn't feel like there was so much of a separation between my work day and the rest of my life, which felt great. For me, a good life is a couple things. One, being fully present in each moment, because I find that when I am fully present, like, you know, you and I having this great conversation now, or if I'm with Josh and we're just hanging out, it does not matter what we're doing, but I feel so peaceful and content and like all is well in the world. Even if there's challenges, I feel a sense of peace. And that's one component of it. And I think the other component for me of living a good life is is having good friends and having a lot of fun. I think any time that I slip into taking things too seriously, you know, like, I don't know, you walk around your day and you're like, "Wow, I have so many things to do." And I'm like, "Wait a minute. This is all awesome stuff to do, and I set my life up this way. I better not take it so seriously and have a little fun and put on some music and dance." When that kind of thread of celebration and irreverence and not taking things too seriously, that's what living a good life feels like to me.

Thank you guys so much for watching. I made this video because Yelena asked me to. So if there's a famous entrepreneur that you want me to profile next, leave it in the comments below and I'll join the discussion. I'd also love to know which of Marie's top 10 rules meant the most to you, had the biggest impact. Leave it in the comments and I'll join the discussion. And one last thing, my personal goal is to hit 1 million subscribers on this channel. So anything that you can think of to share the video, tweet it, add it to the playlist, Tell your friends about it. I'd really, really, really, really appreciate it. Thank you guys so much. Continue to believe, and I'll see you soon.

The fact that when you're good at whatever you're good at— so for me, I was so passionate about spirituality and personal development and all of the tools that come in that toolbox But recognizing you also have to know how to run a business. And being good at something isn't the same thing as being able to run a business doing that thing. And I recognized very quickly that I needed to understand how to market and I wanted to use these new online tools specifically because I was so embarrassed about my age because I was so young that I wanted to use the internet, which I did, to mask my age. And I never lied, but I got headshots done that made me look much older than I was, and I put up a website, and all of my clients came to me through the internet. And if they didn't ask how old I was, I didn't tell them. I just did the best work I could. But that key lesson about even if you love something, and even if it's your passion, you have to also get passionate about entrepreneurship.

If you wanna make a living at it.

If you wanna make a living at it. As a solo entrepreneur, as a business owner.

Nothing will kill your business faster than being lost in a crowd of sameys. How many people here ever feel like you look around and it's like everybody's doing the same shit? Right? Do you feel like that? Everybody starts copying each other and it all starts to look the same and it all starts to sound the same. So positioning is all about positioning yourself to be vastly different. This is probably one of my favorite parts of this presentation. I'm gonna teach you something that is so damn good. I promise if you do this for your whole business and every product or service you have, you'll be able to articulate very, very clearly exactly how you are different. And more importantly than articulating it, it's gonna be a living, breathing essence of how you stand apart from everybody else.

I feel like I love process of learning and discovering new things so much, and I love seeing other people win. So like learning these new ideas and new skills that I'd never been exposed to before, and then being able to teach them to other people and watch the aha moments or the breakthroughs or the progress happen for them. I love seeing other people win. So that's what kept driving me, and I was like, wow, if I could do this with 5 people, I could do this with like 20 people or 100 people or 1,000 people. And it was really, it was exciting.