Gaur Gopal Das Motivational Speech: 3 Happiness Hacks To Avoid Feeling Overwhelmed!
Gaur Gopal Das shares three happiness hacks to manage overwhelm: seek uplifting content like podcasts and videos, ignore negative mental chatter like ignoring a crying child, and build close relationships to confide in. He uses stories including a suicidal student saved by watching his videos, and teaches acceptance through the Okra principle: remove the spoiled part, not the whole.
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Time does fly. Time has two wings and one beak, like an airplane. The two wings of the plane called time are past and future. Yesterday and tomorrow are the two wings, and the bonnet, that front beak, is the present. And time flies like a plane flies. Time may fly, but you are the pilot of the plane. You have to decide where to take your time. You have to decide where to invest your time. You have to decide how to utilize our time. Otherwise, time is just flying wherever it wants to. Don't say, "I spend my time." Say, "I'm investing my time." You invest, you look for returns. You say, I spent my time, it's gone. You say, I investment my time in my career, I invested my time in my study, I invested my time in association, there is a return, ROI, return on investment. Hey, it's Evan Carmichael, and I make these videos because in my first business, I struggled to stay afloat. I quit on my business partner, and the thing that kept me motivated, that kept me going was studying the stories of famous, successful entrepreneurs. And in their stories, it gave me the hope, the drive, the ambition, the thinking that maybe I can do it too, that extra bit of belief. And I still need their stories today, and I'm honored to share them with you here as well. So today, let's get some incredible motivation from the one and only Guru Gopal Das. Enjoy. One of my friends used to say, life is unfair, get used to it. How many of you heard that one? Yeah. And there's another friend of mine who's a big businessman. He said, life is unfair, learn to negotiate. Two contrary statements. One is saying life is unfair, get used to it. Like giving in. And the other is saying life is unfair, negotiate. Work on something. Which one's right? Which one's wrong? Both are right. Life is unfair. Learn to live with it. When things come and you can't change it, acceptance is the only way. And life is unfair. Learn to negotiate, solve problems, and craft your own happiness. Happiness. Right? I'll tell you what, that is life. We all have the choice to craft our happiness, make a happy life. Remember, if life gives you a cactus, you don't have to sit on it. You can do what you need to do with the cactus, we can also learn to choose to live a better life. Ladies and gentlemen, life can get finished anytime. Before life gets finished, complete your life by adding these values to your life. Secrets of living well is what makes your life a happy life. One guy asked, what is the difference between the word complete and finished. But the fellow said, if you find the right partner to get married to in your life, your life is complete. If you get the wrong one, life is finished. But if the right one catches you with the wrong one, life is completely finished, guys. But before life is finished, let's complete it. We all have these desires and we all keep fulfilling these desires. You have this wrong concept of happiness. Let me work hard, let me get all the money, let me buy all of that stuff, let me get all the phones, let me have those palaces, let me have my dream house, let me have my dream car, and I'll be happy. You dream. And there's nothing wrong with dreaming. There's nothing wrong with earning. And there's nothing wrong with having. But to dream that this is what will make you happy, I'm sorry to say, recently in Silicon Valley I met a friend of mine and his life is no different. After a certain while, itna mil gaya uske aap gaye hain. Abhi ke sonak hai ga, sonak. Sonak toh illekt to banadi hai khaiga kya sonak. After you cross a certain limit, no, it's all a status game. It has no value. It can't add more value to your life. It's all a status game. Again, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying don't earn. I'm just saying don't make the mistake of equating your happiness with something that only has utility value. Of course, when we're talking about measurements, we're measuring in one way. Yes. Correct. So the data and the statistics would be in one space. Yes. So in that particular space, we would say we list here. If we start measuring, basing some other yardstick as a yardstick of measurement, probably have a different, whole different statistics available to us. Nevertheless, having said that, I think I often say whether you drive a BMW or a Rolls-Royce, it's not the car that brings happiness, it's the journey. When the focus shifts overtly to the car than the journey, you're compromising with your experience. Car is important. A good car is great. No problem. But when you focus overtly on that, you're compromising with your journey. I say often it's not an iPhone or a Samsung, it's the quality of your conversation on that phone that gives you that experience of happiness. But when your attention moves from the quality of conversations to the quality of your phone overtly, you're kind of compromising with your experience. I often say that it's not the watch watch that, whether it's a Rolex or a Tissot or whatever it is, you know, or a Giorgio Armani, whatever brand, or Rado, or a Breitling, whatever watch you wear, I really don't think it's the watch that gives you that happiness. It's how you utilize that time on that watch that gives you that experience. But when your focus shifts from utilizing your time to your watch and flaunting that watch I think we are compromising with our experience. I don't think it's the house that's made of bricks and cement that brings us the happiness, whether it's in Malabar Hill with the most fancy furnishings inside and a massive space. I think it's the quality of our relationships in that house that brings us happiness. It's the home that brings us happiness. So it's not India or America or any place in the world. Anybody, anybody who prioritizes things, achievements of things, and starts equating the quality of their life with those things, okay, will definitely have a compromised standard of experience. Whereas those who prioritize the quality of their journey, the quality of their relation— I'm not saying the thing shouldn't be there, absolutely not saying I'm just saying equating happiness to that is where the problem is. Because then, you know, today— and it also comes from what's considered a social standard of being accepted as being— the social standard of being accepted as cool. Today you're not judged for who you— you're not accepted for who you are. You're accepted for the car you drive or the area you live in or the clothes you wear. Class of an airplane that you fly on, a flight that you fly on. So in a society where the standards of your success are so shallow, then the pressure to conform, that if I don't have this, if I don't, if I'm not at this party, I'm this FOMO, the fear of missing out. I'm missing out on something. Big thing, big thing. But who created it? A standard that we made, that this is what happiness means. But if we understand that there are finer things that bring us happiness, these things have utility value. Let's use them. Use the best stuff, no problem. Use the best stuff. Who says you don't have a Rolls-Royce? But if you think Rolls-Royce makes you happy, I'm sorry. Yeah, have the fanciest house. Who says don't have it? But if you think it's the house that makes you happy, I'm not sure if bricks and Cement can make me happy. Also, to make sure you're actually taking action after watching this video, I've designed a special free worksheet just for this video. The worksheet will highlight all of the lessons learned in this video, as well as pull out our 3 favorite learnings and quotes that will inspire you to actually do something. The worksheet will also give you space to write down what your key takeaways are and your specific plan of action to make sure you're getting results. If you want the worksheet designed specifically for this video, absolutely for free, there's a link in the description below. Go click on it and start building the momentum in your life and your business. I'll see you there. There was a materially poor man who once approached a sage. Some say it was the Buddha and asked him, why am I so poor? The Buddha answered, probably Probably because you don't practice generosity. Probably because you don't practice charity. Amused and a little upset by the response, the man challenged, Charity? I don't have anything. How can I practice charity? The sage replied, Who said you don't have anything? You have 5 treasures with you that you can definitely share with others and give to others. Firstly, you have your smile which you can share with others. It's free and it's awesome and it has an amazing impact on others. Secondly, you have your eyes. You can look at others with eyes full of love and concern and make them feel cared for. Third, you have your tongue. With your tongue, you can speak kind, encouraging, appreciative, uplifting words and make make people feel valued and inspired. You can spread joy and positivity using your tongue. And then you have your heart. With your loving heart, you can wish well for others and pray for the well-being and happiness of others. And lastly, you possess the treasure of your body. With this body, you can serve others, do good deeds, help people in need. Help is not always money. A small caring gesture can light someone's life up as well. Do these and you'll certainly feel rich. Of course, the message is not that financial resources are not needed. We live in a real world with real needs. Moreover, without caring for ourselves, it's hard to care for others. The message here is that even if we don't have the required resources, we can still be the instruments of doing good in our own ways. According to our own capacities and make this world a better place than what it is now. That state of hopelessness, if you don't speak up, it'll lead to further hopelessness. And if you still don't speak up, it can go to further hopelessness. And so bad, I saw my aunt burn herself. To death. I saw my friend's son, his medical mark sheet, being the topper of the university, kept next to his dead body. Hello, bol paate toh? If only they would have opened up their heart and spoken their heart, well, maybe my aunt would still be with me. Maybe my friend's son would still be doing his postgrad and contributing to the world by healing other people with his medical expertise. I have an humble appeal. Look for that friend. If you have one, blessed are you. Open your heart on a regular basis. If you don't have one, look for one and invest in that relationship. My meditation is— before bed, my meditation is a gratitude practice. Like prayer? Prayer. Every evening before I go to bed is a practice of gratitude, recounting all the things that happened in the day and being grateful for everything that happened, consciously practicing gratitude. And eventually it just becomes a part of you anyways. And the first thing in the morning, as soon as I am up, is also beginning my day with gratitude. And then of course I have a specific time for meditation as well, which I spend like an hour and a half every day. Problems happen, challenges happen, struggles happen, issues happen, misunderstandings happen. Health crises happen, financial crunches happen, markets go down, and that happens. All of that happens. Happiness doesn't happen. You have to make it happen because right things don't happen. You have to make the right things happen. Fitness is the right thing. It doesn't happen. You have to make fitness happen. Any of you want to lose any weight? Thank you. Others, baaki sab fita lagta hai. Baaki sab po koi kisi ka paati nahi lose weight hai re. Kya sir, ye sab toh diya hai, bolne ke liye bhool aaya apko. Lose weight, you know, I have told one of my friend, he put on so much weight and I said, "Vajan kam kar bhai." You know what he's telling me? He's telling me, "Vajan kam kar ke kya karne? Vajan kam kar ke kya karne aakhir sab ko ek din maarne hai. Isliye abhi jo bhi khana hai, khalo mere dost. Nu ki aagle life mein fir teen kilo sei shuru karna." That was his reply. That guy, tell you, he deserved the whack. Losing weight doesn't happen. You have to make it happen. Not reacting when you're angry, shutting that bloody mouth up doesn't happen. You have to make it happen. Aapne aap, right? Things don't happen automatically. Only wrong things happen automatically. Right things, you have to make them happen, guys. They don't happen like that. One man was asking his wife, when you're like really, really, really angry at me, what do you do to vent out your anger on me? Question to Poojna. He's asking his wife. You know, like, really wild it'd be. What do you do to vent out your anger? She said, I clean the commode in the house. So he said, why do you clean the commode to vent out your anger on me? She said, I clean it with your toothbrush. So the next morning, there's some special effects in your mouth. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. We all react in our own ways. She has a toothbrush and you have your own ways to lose it. Ladies and gentlemen, not reacting and shutting this up doesn't happen. You have to make it happen. Saying a sorry when somebody hurts you or forgiving somebody when somebody hurts you doesn't happen. You have to make it happen. I'll tell you what, the nature of problems is that it consumes our mind. Imagine a tooth which is hurting. I don't know if somebody's had their finger stuck in the edge of the door and the door slammed. Good heavens, it hurts like hell! And then the pain is just so all-consuming, the mind just focuses so much on the pain, right? I think it's just the nature of problems that it draws our mind towards them. Like the tongue going towards the cumin seed in my tooth when it was stuck. It's like gravity, the law of gravity. If we put this bottle up and put it up here and drop it, it's going to just be pulled down. Yeah. Dragged down by the power of gravity. I think there's a power of gravity existing within us as well. They're just natural for us to be dragged down to our issues, our problems, right? To everything that's negative. I think being, being pulled into negativity is so normal. It's like gravity. Put this bottle down, it falls down. You don't have to do anything. But if I were to pull water up from the ground floor to the 8th floor, I need a motor to work against gravity, and I need conscious hard work to bring it there. So it's so natural for the mind to feel negative and go towards the problem. But if I have to look at 31 other teeth, I have to make a conscious choice to take my tongue away, right? If I have to pull the water down from ground floor to the 8th floor, I have to put a pump to pull it up. It's not easy work, it's hard work, right? But hard work pays off. That's when you like look at really saying, okay, this is fulfilling me now. And not that— and, and I, I definitely don't want to impose this, this principle of gratitude in a, in an unrealistic way on people because sometimes misery is so intense. Absolutely. You know, when troubles are smaller, you can still consciously look at the brighter side of life, you know. But sometimes troubles are just so intense and massive, and they seem to be like mountains, unmoving, unshakable mountains. They just stand there for ages and decades. How in such a situation— wouldn't it be so violent to forcefully impose the principle of gratitude on a person whose life is so acutely absorbed in intense misery? You know, I call that toxic positivity. It's toxic. It's not natural. So what does one do, really? Yeah, it's just— yeah, in such a situation when it's just so overwhelmingly painful, you know, my take on it is it's hard to look at the brighter side when this intense pain there. But at the same time, I also feel if we are consumed by negativity with that pain and that problem and occupying our mind, we lose the ability to deal with it the way we are meant to, correct? So if we could seek help— if I'm not able to see it, we could seek help of somebody. It could be professional help, personal help, friends, whoever it could be. We could seek help to be able to shift our attention to even the tiniest things so that that little positivity becomes the anchor to In an interview on a television show, the anchor asked the tennis legend Martina Navratilova, how do you maintain your focus and manage to keep playing even at the age of 43? The instant response that she gave was mind-blowing. She said, well, to be honest, the ball has absolutely absolutely no idea about how old I am. Plus, the need to focus is only for 10% of the match. For the rest, 90%, I don't even have to focus. In a typical tennis match, the players spend less than 15% of their time hitting the ball. During a round of golf, golfers spend less than 20% of their round swinging at the golf club. And in American football, the ball is actually in play for only 6% of the game. Sports psychologist Garrett Kramer says that a key factor to performing well in sports, and I suppose in life as well, is your ability to control the quality and the quantity of your internal dialogue. Our performance can reach its peak and we can realize our highest potential when the internal interference which stops us from giving our best is minimized and eventually stopped. Isn't it said that any game, including the game of life, is played on a 6-inch course, the space between our ears? If we can master that space, we can master any space in life. Walking with lions casually can probably be easy when the lions are tamed, when we have experts who can deal with them around us and take charge of any untoward situation that may happen. Otherwise, we all know that the lion is an extremely powerful strong and a ferocious animal, and we dare not go close to a lion. But the same lion, with all its strength, power, ferocity, and influence as the king of the jungle, can be helplessly disturbed and frustrated. Any guesses who can frustrate a lion? A tiny Little bird. Sometimes a bird may come and sit on the back of the lion, scratch it, tickle it, or pass on it. And to say nothing of driving away the bird. The lion cannot even reach it at times. And even if somehow the lion can reach it, the bird just flies away. Ladies and gentlemen, we as human beings Human beings have our power in the society that we live in as well. Our power comes from money, position, fame, influence, talent, skill. But just like the lion has that bird which can disturb him, we have that one bird which can leave us helpless, hopeless, sleepless. Extremely frustrated and disturbed. That bird, which is our constant companion, is our mind. The greatest power in the world is not money or riches, position, and influence. The greatest power in the world is our ability to take charge of our mind and focus it on and direct it to where we want it to to be and not get directed by the mind. All mental health issues— depression, pressure, negativity, anxiety, stress, loneliness, worry— come from the inability to be with the mind. Spirituality and meditation is that practice which helps us to take charge of the mind, to train and be empowered to live a life which is peaceful, mindful, and joyful. A tortoise will withdraw its limbs when it feels intimidated, when it feels insecure, when it feels fearful of being attacked. But when the tortoise finds itself in a surrounding which is protected and secure, the tortoise will bring all of its limbs comes out. I think even in our relationships, when we feel the fear of being judged, the fear of being used, the fear of being rejected, we withdraw ourselves from people in our relationships, don't we? Very true. But when we feel protected, when we feel secure, when we feel ourselves in a surrounding, in an environment where there is there is trust, where there is understanding, where we are treated with respect, when we are treated with love, that's when we bring ourselves fully out to connect to that person. We are happy confiding to them, we are happy to speak to them, we are happy to deeply connect with them. And I think that's really what makes a relationship really meaningful and happy, isn't it? So yes, a tortoise does teach us that we should look for those people in our relationships who can give us that surrounding that we can bring out most of our— bring the best out of us. And we should try and avoid those surroundings where we feel fearful of being judged, you know, and being used, in which case we need to withdraw like the tortoise withdraws its limbs within its shell. Ladies and gentlemen, if we have problems in our life, it only means there is life, and we need to celebrate life. Yes, indeed. The problems may differ, like I said. The flavors may vary. The magnitudes may vary. Some have different kinds of problems to different magnitudes, and we may have a completely different nature of problem to a different magnitude. How many of you here have eaten something when your mind wanted it? Thank you very much. How many of you here have said something to someone when your mind wanted it? Thank you. How many of you have walked into a shopping mall or into a branded store to buy something when your mind said it? I think we live in a world where we have all become— excuse my jargon— servants and slaves to our mind. What if we learn to reverse the situation and rather than being slaves to the mind, learn to be masters to the mind? Where rather than the mind being in our control, we are in control of our minds. The pathetic state of the world that we are in today, however, is because, like Mahatma Gandhi said, there is enough in the world for everybody's need, But it's not enough for one man's greed. It's lack of self-control that makes people greedy. It's lack of self-control that makes us consumers, consuming, consuming, consuming, consuming at the cost of all of those resources that nature provided us so that we can sustainably live and create a legacy of sustainability for the future generations. Unfortunately for us, however, we don't look at it that way. Consumption is not a problem. We need to live in the world, we need to consume. But should that consumption be at the cost of everything that provides us and everything that gives us? You know, and which is why I do believe that when we are slaves and servants to the mind, we are consumers. But when we are masters to our mind, we are contributors. One of the Sustainable Development Goals of the United Nations is responsible production and consumption. Be responsible in consuming and be responsible in producing. Many of us love eating good food. As fancy as the preps may look and as delicious as they may be, they get digested once they enter into our system. And the body needs to throw the unwanted waste out in a day, failing which can cause illness. There is nothing in the world that can quench our thirst more and make us feel more refreshed than water. Yet if the body doesn't throw that water out in a couple of hours, that retained water can be the cause of illness. I once saw a very elderly yoga teacher teach her students breathing techniques. She asked them to breathe in and hold their breath. But elderly as she was, she happened to fall asleep. The students who respected her a lot were unable to hold their breaths any longer but didn't even want to disobey her. Finally, as they were gasping, one of them walked up to her and woke her up. As she got up, she said, "And now breathe out." As funny as this may sound, the air we breathe in can be held for no more than a few minutes, and if it's not thrown out, we may die. Isn't this principle true for our Negative emotions as well? Emotional hurt, grudges, jealousy, feelings of hatred, revenge, anger can make our minds toxic. Yet we continue to hold them in our systems, only leading to so many psychological and consequently physical disorders. The body has a system to remove unwanted food water, or air without us even being aware of it. How we wish there were an automatic arrangement that could throw negative feelings and emotions out as well. But that's not how it works with the mind. We have to consciously work on purging these toxic emotions out of our inner systems. And here Here are 3 suggested ways to get these feelings out. First, write your feelings down on a piece of paper and tear it into pieces or burn it into ashes. This practice doesn't necessarily solve the problem but allows us to express ourselves and release the negative energy, at least temporarily. Open your heart and confide into someone close and trustworthy. Sharing our feelings can not only lighten the heaviness we feel, but we may also receive support and guidance to deal with our negativity. Third, the most powerful, of course, is adopting a spiritual practice which can help us cleanse our consciousness and give us the inner strength to fight these tendencies. Always remember that it's not the glass of water, which is only a couple of grams in weight, that hurts our hand. It is the duration for which we hold it. The quicker we keep it down, the better it is for us. A man during his travels once came up to a mountain where he found a lady meditating under a tree. Quite intrigued by her presence in a solitary place like this, he asked her, "What are you doing here alone in such a secluded place?" The lady replied that she had a lot of work to do on that mountain. A little amused, the man asked, "A lot of work? I cannot see anything around you here." "Sir, what do you have to do up here on this mountain?" The lady replied, "Well, I have to train 2 hawks and 2 eagles, teach 2 rabbits, discipline 1 snake, motivate a donkey, and tame a lion." "And if I might ask you, where are they? I don't see any of them up here," questioned the man. "Actually, sir, you'll never be able to see them because they all live inside here within me, said the lady. The hawks stare at everything that comes to me— people, good or bad, situations, good or bad, things, good or bad— and have to work hard to train them to focus on the good side. The hawks represent the vision behind my eyes. And the two eagles with their claws can hurt and destroy. I have to train them not to hurt. Those eagles are my hands that need to do something constructive for the world and not create or engage in anything hurtful or destructive. Rabbits are very swift and they want to go wherever they want where they want to go. I have to teach them to not just run around, but run in the right direction. After all, what use is the speed if there is no direction? The rabbits represent my feet, and I always want them to go in the right direction in life. The donkey is often lethargic and at times acts very stubborn. Need to motivate it to continue on with its work. My mind is exactly like the donkey. It takes up something but then loses the enthusiasm to continue and also can be very obstinate at times. A lot of hard work goes into dealing with this donkey, sir, to plead with it to keep going on and on. The most most difficult to tame, however, is the snake. Although it is locked in a strong cage with 32 bars, it's always ready to sting, bite, and poison anyone nearby. I have to discipline it, and that is my tongue. I have one lion too. Oh, how proud, how vain! He thinks he's the king. I have to tame him and show him his position, and that's my ego. So now you see, my dear sir, I have lots of work to do up here on the mountain. Ladies and gentlemen, all of us have lots of work to do as well— internal work that can transform our external life. So let's stop gossiping, let's stop criticizing, let's stop evaluating and judging others. Let's start looking at and working on our own lives. Isn't it said, yesterday I was trying to be clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I'm trying to be wise, so I know that I need to change myself. I don't think the past generation had a buying capacity that we have today. I don't think the past generation had an investment capacity complexity that we have in the world out there today. I think we have scaled up. We have reached and escalated ourselves up to the 29th floors, and I believe we should keep getting better and reaching for better in scaling up more and more and more. Technology-wise, good heavens, technologically, I don't think we have been ever so globally connected as today. I don't think so. There's never been a time in the history of creation that the world has been so globally connected. How people know each other, how people can be so connected to each other physically miles apart, thousands of miles apart, yet sharing a very close bonding. How many of you have done— made— ever had a religious fast or something? Dharamik fast? A religious fast. You know, in today's age, you don't have to fast from food and water. Ek din aap log na, bina smartphone, bina WhatsApp, bina Facebook, bina Instagram, bina Snapchat, ek din upwas kar ke dekha hain, Bhagawan niche uttar ke ainge, niche uttar ke ainge aur bolenge, bas kar pagle ula hai. This is what God will tell us. Hand on my heart, hand on my heart, I must tell you, we have scaled up. And I can go on and on and on describing how we have gone up the 29 floors of success. I'm just wondering, is there a possibility that we may have left the key to true fulfillment Satisfaction, contentment, way too behind. Like my friend and my host left the key in the car. I'm not sure. I don't see people any happier than the last generation. I see people more miserable than the last generation. I don't see people any happier than the last generation. I see people more stressed than the last generation. I don't see people any satisfied than the last generation. I see more people more anxious than the last generation. I don't see people more peaceful and stable than the last generation. I see people more disturbed than the last generation. I saw a t-shirt, a guy was wearing a t-shirt. You know these t-shirts have these funny slogans. One of these t-shirts had a slogan saying, "Please do not disturb." Underneath was written in big letters, "Already disturbed." This is what I'm trying to say. With all the success that you have achieved, are you satisfied? With all the escalation, with all the fast pace at which you've gained what you have today, do you feel fulfilled? With all what you have at your beck and call, people to work under you, people to report to you, guys looking at you and saluting you. Man, you made it there. Do you feel there's some pinprick somewhere? You know, a question that needs to be addressed? And believe me, you, I'm not saying we shouldn't scale up. Did I say that? I'm not saying we shouldn't go up the 29 floors. Did I say that? I'm just saying, as we are reaching the 29 floors, Can we afford to forget the key? As you're going up, I'm saying, why 29? Climb up to 290. I'm a very ambitious man and I teach people to be ambitious. I'm saying, why the heck are you thinking of thinking small? Why the heck are you thinking 29 floors? That's idiocy. That's mediocrity. You shouldn't think small. You should never think small. You should think big, absolutely big, to grow up to not 29, 290 floors up. But should it be at the cost? That's my question. That's all I'm asking. Should it be at the cost of taking a key along? Which is why I always like to speak about these two terms. One is called being successful. And second is called feeling successful. Astrology, Jyotishastra, palmistry, parrot cards, tarot cards— everyone's wanting to know the secret that life holds for future. How many of you would like to take a journey into the future? Thank you. How many of you would be interested to know how long you would live? There are some courageous souls. How many of you would like to know who your life partner would be? Abhi Sharma gaye koi heart ne hota hai. Aur hai kuch log hai. Oh my God! Astrology is such a big thing. I was coming from some country and it was a free flight, 75 of us, and one man was totally drunk. I was sitting there, he comes up to me and says, "Panditji, Panditji, haad dekhte hain?" I said, "Jarrur dekhte la ho?" He stuck his palm out. I said, "Liver cirrhosis hone wala hai?" He said, "Barabar bula, doctor ne bhi yei bula tha." I said, "It doesn't require astrology to see the way you are drunk that you will get liver cirrhosis, you know." One guy came up to an astrologer and said, "Bahut problem chal rahi saar, bahut problem chal rahi." Looked at his kundali and said, "Shani ka sadhe satye tere ko." This guy said, "Do surupya nahi hai, saab." So he said, "Soorupya de do." He said, "Soobi nahi hai." He said, "Mere bhai, pachaas de de, pachaas de." "What will Shani do to you?" You get lost. If you don't have anything, what will Shani anyways do to you? I'm sure all of us are looking for answers. Guesses of what would happen with us, isn't it? One who's born will be dead. One who's dead will be born. We have no control. I didn't have any control over how I was born and where I was born. I didn't have any control over what my looks were, what family I was born in, what country I was born in, what socioeconomic class I was born in. I had no control over it. And I must say that we truly have no control over when life ends and how we die. Just cardinal facts of life. But there's something that we have control over which can make life beautiful. Therefore, I generally say life is a journey between two alphabets, B and D, where B stands for birth and D stands for death. What is in control is between the alphabets B and D is an alphabet called C. Between B and D is a C, and that C is choice. We can all learn to choose. As we live our lives, we can all learn to choose not to prove, but to improve. We can all learn to choose not to react, but to respond. We can all learn to choose how not to get affected by what's happening in our lives all around us. And it does. Our life is a matter of choices. Live well, it won't easily go wrong. You can't change your situations, you can change your response, ladies and gentlemen. How can every morning be the same? How can every afternoon be the same? How can every evening be the same? How can every day be the same? Every day is a different day. And therefore they changed the greeting now. Greeting, good morning, happy morning, happy morning, sir, happy morning, how are you doing this morning, happy morning, good morning, good morning, Usko jake budo ho chillaya, kya hai re good morning mein? You can't say good morning because sometimes there may be nothing good in that morning, nothing good in that day. So now the term is happy morning. Happy morning. Because whether the morning is good or not, you can still choose to be happy, right? Whether it's good or not cannot be a choice. Whether the morning is good or not for you cannot be a choice. It's not a choice for you. When you wake up, some virus may enter into your head and you get up with a high fever. It's not a choice you have. Whether the morning is good or not is not in your control. Whether the afternoon is good or not is not in your control. Whether the evening is good or not is not in your control. Whether the day is good or not is not in your control. But whether you can be happy in that moment, well, you can choose to be. When people say smile, it doesn't mean things are going good. It just means that they've chosen to smile. Let's get the facts right. Success is not just about achievements. This is narrative that the more you have, the more successful you are. But I know people who have a lot and have serious mental health issues. I consider that a failure. I know about— we, we left— we, we Just lost Mr. Rakesh Jhunjhunwala, and we remember what he said. Remember his words. He said, "I have about $5 billion worth." And he said, "I only wish God gave me better health." If I have all the money in the world and my mental health is at stake, my emotional health is at stake, my physical health is at stake, my spiritual health is at stake, my social health is at stake, am I successful? So let's not make one element of success as success. Yes, achievements and financial success is a very crucial element, but not the element, you know. A balance and having paid attention to all of these aspects is when we can truly call ourselves successful. Like one gentleman asked someone, you know, uh, what is the difference between the word complete and finished? He said, well, if you find a right partner in your life to get married to, your life is complete. If you get the wrong one, your life is finished. But if the right one catches you with the wrong one, your life is completely finished. Sorry about that. But I think, I think when we are looking at— we want to complete everything, isn't it? And which is precisely why it's important we complete our definition of success too. By including those elements that are important for our life, not just for our lifestyle. Achievements and money is about lifestyle. Emotional, mental, social, spiritual health is about our life. And lifestyle and life must go hand in hand. That's when success is completed. And if you're looking at 3 elements which we really must look at, whatever aspect of success, if you want to be successful, number 1 is we shouldn't be goal-focused, we should be process-focused. I see a lot of guys go to the gym. You know, any of you guys go to the gym? Okay, brilliant. Any of you want to reduce your weight a little bit? Oh God, my God. You can't lose 10 kilos in a day. That guy needed a whack, trust me. You know, now when you go to a gym, I see these younger guys going to a gym and doing bicep curls. That's the only exercise they focus on because that's the way to woo girls. Show your guns. So you'll see them go to the gym. I'm gonna put the microphone down for a second. Even if you don't hear me, it's fine, guys. They'll do this. This and then swing. The biceps don't lift the weight at all. It's the body that's lifting the weight. And in the mirror they're saying, they should be isolating their biceps and just picking their weight with the biceps, right? So when you're goal-focused, you don't get the goal. When you're process-focused, you reach there. So whatever it is in your life that you want you want to achieve, focus on the process. The more consumed you are by the process, there's greater chances you reach the goal than just focusing on the goal and not on the process. We all have that villain in our life, right? Or so we call them, because sometimes it's a perception that they're villains, sometimes the reality that they're villains. We all have that person in us, in our stories. We all have that one person in our stories. Just to purify you of all of this, sent you that person. Everybody has that one person in their lives. Just one taster that I want to give you, just one thing. So much can be said on that topic, like I said, it's a whole discussion in itself. But when When you forgive someone, that's not necessarily for them. When you forgive someone, that is for you, for your peace, so that you come to peace with things. Sometimes what they do doesn't even deserve forgiveness. You know what I say often? Forgive or die. To not forgive is a very individual choice. If you want to live in peace, however, it is imperative that we let go of what we have held in our minds and we pent up in our minds. Because small or less, this phone may be what, 200 grams, 300 grams. If I hold this phone on my palm, it's going to hurt me a little bit for a while. If I hold it for 2 hours, it's going to hurt my wrist a lot. If I hold it for an entire day, it's going to start numbing my wrist. If I hold it for an entire week without putting it down, it's going to paralyze my wrist. It's not what you hold and how long you hold. It's not what you hold and how heavy it is, but it's how long we hold it. So to keep down that phone is some compassion to my own wrist, not to the phone. So what I hold for somebody is like that phone. It's not so much for them. It's for my own peace. It's for my own, my own coming to terms with my own joy. And, and forgiveness doesn't necessarily mean forgetting it. We've always been told forgive and forget, forgive and forget. Forgive and forget. No, you know what? When we are talking about forgiving and forgetting, forgiving is about stopping that person, that person's actions, that person, what that person is doing to influence how we feel now. Memories are not going to be easily erased. Memories of what people have done to us. Do you think memories can be easily erased? You know what? When I take— am I okay to take a picture of you, all of you guys? Instagram story. See, I'm going to take a picture. Show you quickly. Here's the picture, correct? Now if I want to delete this picture, right, it's gone. And now if I go to my trash in this and delete it, it's permanently deleted from the memory, correct? But that's because this is a phone. Any impression that is made on the SIM card or on the memory of this phone in Sanskrit is called a samskara. Samskara means an impression that is made on something. It goes through this lens and leaves an impression on there. But these impressions are very easy to delete. At the press of a delete button, it's gone from your memories. Guess what, ladies and gentlemen? In our life, through what we read, hear, what happens to us, there are a lot of samskaras happening on this memory here. And they are not easy to delete. So I'm not even— that's why I said I'm not even asking you to delete them. You need to be so elevated spiritually to be able to just go, leave it all behind. We are not. We are people living in the real world. So when we say forgive, we are saying don't allow that person now to control your peace. Let go. But we are also simultaneously saying that there is going to be that side. And every single time you see that person, imagine an abuser coming in front of those person was abused. That memory would trigger everything back again, right? Everything back again. And that's precisely why during the course of my talk I had said forgiveness, saying sorry doesn't happen. We have to make it happen by shifting our attention elsewhere. A, I'll stay away from my triggers which trigger that memory. But if that memory does come to me and I feel angry, I feel hurt, I feel everything coming to me, I'll be compassionate to my own self and say it's okay. It's okay. Be compassionate to yourselves. Compassion is not just my intention. For others. So be self-compassionate. If you feel anger, you feel anger. If you feel hurt, you feel hurt. If you go through what you go through, you go through what you go through. Don't stay there because it's ruining your life. There was this teacher in London. She's in London. She came to the class and she asked all the kids a question. I want to give you all an assignment. I want all of you to write on your notebooks, answers to this question: What do you want to be when you grow up? And the obvious answers: engineers, doctors, actors, and nowadays social media influencers, YouTubers, you know, like Insta stars nowadays. Things have changed. Engineer, engineer, engineer. Nowadays, youngsters say, "Engineer? YouTuber." And nowadays narratives have changed. People say, "Monk?" Can you believe that? Change of narrative. Because this is like monk swag. Am I a monk with a swag? So nowadays youngsters say, "Inke jisawana hai." Change of narrative. So everybody wrote their answers. One boy was sitting in the class. He hadn't written it. He was taking a little longer. So the teacher came to the boy and said, "You've not written your answer yet?" "I'm just finishing." Teacher said, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" The boy said, "I want to be happy." The teacher looked at him gobsmacked. Like gobsmacked. She said, "Look son, I don't think you understood the assignment." The boy turned to the teacher and said, "Look ma'am, I don't think you understood life. Because if you would have understood life, you would know well that what you want to be when you grow up is happy. And the legendary boy who gave this legendary answer was none but John Lennon from the Beatles. He was the one who gave this answer. When you turn 22, what do you want to be? When you turn you turn 42, what do you want to be? When you want to turn 62, what do you want to be? When you turn a billionaire, what do you want to be? When you reach the peak of your career, what do you want to be? A very simple, a very simple answer. We all want to be happy. A lady named Maria lived with her mother in a small apartment. She was not too young nor too old, not too short nor too tall either, not particularly beautiful nor was she ugly. Maria was just an average woman. She worked as a secretary at a large company and her life was pretty boring and mundane. No one at work ever paid paid any attention to her, and those who did considered her to be as boring as her life was. One morning, on her way to work, Maria saw a new hat shop that had opened just down the street. Out of curiosity, she walked in. In the shop was a lady with her daughter who had come to pick a hat for her girl, and a couple of other customers customers who were trying different hats. Maria also tried a few hats until she found one she truly liked. She put it on and it looked really nice. The first one to notice was the little girl who exclaimed, "Mommy, look how pretty that woman looks with the hat on!" The mother said, "Ma'am, I must say this hat Looks awesome on you. Another man in the shop also came up to Maria and said, ma'am, you look lovely with that hat on. Maria went to the mirror, she looked at herself, and for the first time in years, she liked her own look. Smiling, she went to the counter and bought the hat. As she walked outside and The new world revealed itself to her like never before. She never before noticed the colors of the flowers around her or smelled the scent of the fresh air. Even the sounds of the cars and people on the road sounded like a harmonious melody. She walked as if she was drifting on a cloud with a song poured in her heart. When she passed by the same coffee shop she walked by every morning, a young handsome man called out to her, "Hey, you're looking gorgeous. Can I buy a cup of coffee for you?" She blushed, kept walking, floating on the cloud of her newfound joy. When she got to the office building, The doorman opened the door and wished her good morning. Never before had he even noticed her. The people in the elevator asked her the floor she needed and pressed the button for Maria. Her colleagues at the office, as if seeing her for the very first time, praised her on how lovely she looked that day. The manager asked her out to lunch to talk about how she felt at work. When this extraordinary workday was over, she decided to take a cab back home instead of the bus. As soon as she put her hand up, two taxis stopped. She took the first one and sat in the back seat thinking about the magical day she had had. And how her life felt so different and changed thanks to the new hat. When she got home, her mom opened the door. The sight of Maria took her breath away. Maria, she said, surprised, you're looking fabulous today. Your eyes are all lit up like when you were a little girl. Yes, Mom, said Maria. It's all thanks Thanks to my new hat, I had the most marvelous day in years. New hat? asked the confused mother. Which hat are you talking about? Maria panicked. She touched her head only to realize that the hat that had changed her life was not there. She tried remembering where she may have left it. In the cab? No. At lunch? I don't think so. At the office? Not at all. She thought of the store where she had bought it, how she had noticed it for the first time, how she had put it on her head, how she had gone to pay for it at the cashier's. Oh my goodness! She remembered how she had put it on the counter to get her purse out. Out to pay and how she had forgotten it right there on the counter. And then she had walked out right there to the street, hatless yet glowing. Ladies and gentlemen, it wasn't the external hat that made Maria's day great. It was the quality of her internal dialogue that transformed how she felt. Our internal dialogue can enslave us into a horrible routine life or can liberate us, making our life full of gusto, energy, passion, and joy. Change your hat inside today and look at the magic of how the outside hat simply adds on to your already existing existing gorgeous inner beauty. Ladies and gentlemen, in the modern era, we have mastered the art of being successful. I'm not sure if we have mastered the art of feeling successful. And there's a big difference between being successful and feeling successful. Being successful is quantum numbers. And feeling successful is quality. As you get all the numbers that you dream for, as you get all the numbers that you work hard for, that you get all the numbers that you're passionate about, are you also looking at quality with the quantity? So yes, climbing up is about the quantity, but carrying the key along is about the quality. Quality of your lives. And I think it's such a crucial aspect. Even if you're looking at enhancing your performance, only if you lead a quality life can you enhance effectively. Otherwise, a stressed-out guy is more in his stress than his God. Optimum performance? What the hell? When the mind is not in place, what are we talking about optimum performance? Cut corners, you know, cut corners. Being successful is about what others think of you. Feeling successful is what you think about your own life. Everybody thinks these are hefty guys, you know. Everybody thinks these guys are driving big sedans. Everybody thinks, oh gosh, these guys are making money, man. Everybody thinks you are doing exceedingly well. What are you thinking about yourself? What are you thinking about your life? Who cares a heck what others think about our lives? What do we think about our lives is the question that we all need to ask ourselves. So I'm not against being successful for sure. I'm saying while we are trying to be successful, we need to live our life in a way that we can also feel successful. So today, this evening, afternoon rather, I would give to you two keys. One, how to feel successful in your work, and second, how to be successful in your work. So I'm gonna give you the key when you walk up, but I'm also going to talk to you about how to reach to 90 from 29. Both ways, both are important. Go up and carry the key along. But first I'll talk about the key because that's my home ground, you know, that's my home ground. You can't catch me on the wrong foot there, hopefully. Okay, how many of you were good at maths? Okay, great. How many of you are terrible at maths? How many of you didn't care any less? "Pass ho ja, was ho ja kab hoon?" "Good or bad ke, acha bura ke, pass ho ja." Exam, I just get it done. Sometimes they say MATS stands for Mentally Affected Teachers Harassing Students. The full form of MATS, you know, this is this guy harassing us with this mathematics. I'm an electrical engineer, so mathematics came really easy to me. It was a part of my life. You know, it's like in every cell of your body there's maths. For engineers. One teacher came to a classroom once and said to the kids, if a ship is sinking, a frog is croaking, and potatoes are ₹20 a kilo, guess what my age is? The student said, ma'am, can you come back with the question please? The teacher said, well, a ship is sinking, a frog is croaking, and potatoes are ₹20 for a 'Look, guess what my age is.' One student raised his hand and said, '32, Madam, 32.' She said, 'You're spot on, man, but how did you get that right?' Like sometimes you find child prodigies, you know, they're like masters in singing or dancing or writing or whatever they do. Like if you see 2-year-old kids, when their hands go on a piano, spellbound. Now don't tell me that he could learn that and master it at that age? Don't tell me. A 2-year-old can't master the alphabet. Don't tell me that he mastered it by learning it. In fact, nobody taught it to him. He got it. He got it. Now when you say he got it, don't call it genetic. How does genes give you a music skill? You know, how? So I know kids, young little kids who are like prodigies in what they do at 1 and a half, at 2. It's absolutely phenomenal. And then now, where is, where is faith and belief here? It's rational logic that this guy has it. It's not come from learning, it's not come from reading. Nobody imparted to him. Must come from somewhere. How can there be an effect without a cause? And I can't see an immediate cause right now, so there has to be a remote cause before this, right? You know what I mean? Whether I call it karma, whether I call it whatever, but I, I can't accept an effect without a cause. It's against my rational thinking, you know. So now if this gentleman, this little boy or little girl, he or she has this ink incredible talent. We call it— the common parlance is he or she is God-gifted. Absolutely. Absolutely. God-gifted, man. Look at this guy. Not learned. Look at how they're doing it. So that is— that to me is called luck, call it destiny, call it karma, call it whatever. I didn't get— I didn't grab it. I got it. Matthew McConaughey, when he got the Oscar, he said something phenomenal. I loved it. In fact, it's written in the book as well. He first, of course, thanked God, thanked his wife, thanked his father, thanked his mom, and he said, I want to thank God. I want to thank God because opportunities are not given by the human hand. I didn't I didn't seek a lot and it came to me. How do I explain it? There's a million other people who are seeking, they don't get it. That's right. And I don't seek and I get it. What am I going to explain it by? You know, you know what I mean? Now, what that little one does with that talent, or what that— what this gentleman does, or this lady does with the The opportunity that has come is my free will, or my choice, whether to drive right or to drive left or to not drive. Correct. But the car, for a lot of people, was given. Correct. Now, that free will part is where I often like to quote, I say, I don't know who said it, but it's a beautiful quote. It says, when hard work beats talent, when talent doesn't work hard. Absolutely. You know, so now the talent came to you when you were 2, but if you don't do nothing with it, it has no meaning. It has no meaning. So you didn't drive the car, you grossly abused the fantastic gift, the car that you were given. That's correct. And then the others may not get a car like that, but they have their own car, which they now need to identify. That's called self-discovery. Yes, to be able to identify what's the car you've been given, what's, what's it that you've been gifted with. And everybody has been gifted with something. The one thing that I've learned over the years is that we are all so different. Our lives are so different. Our situations are so different. Our backgrounds are so different. Our upbringing is so different. The journey of our life up until now for each one of us is so different compared to somebody else. And therefore, it's so important that we don't judge our own life or the lives of others by comparing them with someone else's life. Here is an example. If Mr. A can sprint a distance of 10 kilometers in 1 hour, whereas Mr. B covers the same distance in 1.5 hours, which one of the two would you call faster and healthier? The answer obviously would be Mr. A. Now what if I tell you that Mr. A had a prepared track to run on, while Mr. B did it by walking walking on a sandy path? I think our answer will now change, and we probably think that Mr. B is fitter. And let's say we come to know that actually Mr. A is 75 years old while B is only 20. Here we go, our answer changes again, and we now think that the 75-year-old Mr. A is healthier. Guess what? Mr. A weighs 60 kg, whereas Mr. B 125 kg, which makes it really hard for him to run. Who do you think did well? Oh my goodness, now we correct ourselves again as we favor Mr. B. The more we get to know about the strengths and limitations of Mr. A and B respectively, our opinions and judgments about who is better keep changing. And isn't life like that as well, guys? We form opinions about others others so quickly, so hastily, so impulsively, so superficially, without knowing much about them or their situations. We end up judging people, labeling people, and miss out on connecting to and encouraging the immense potential that they may have. Life is not the same for all. Some may not be as talented as others but may get better opportunity and thus scale up very fast, whereas others, despite being super talented, keep struggling just to make the ends meet. Kya hai na? Yeh kismat main lo mein raj karte hain aur kya hai bahar hunar? Sadko par tamasha karte rahta hai. Some may have more resources, whereas others can't find any source to fall back on. Each one has different problems and so No one solution can work for all, just like one size of clothing doesn't fit all. So do not judge others' journey without knowing more. Do not judge your own life by looking at someone else's or comparing your situation with someone else's. You are you and they are they. Your life is your life and theirs is theirs. Do they Take inspiration from their journey in a way that you can enrich yours. And always remember, life is the most difficult exam. Many people fail because they try to copy others, not realizing that everyone has a different question paper. How many of you breathe? I am sorry for asking that question. How many of you have been breathing for the last couple of minutes as I started this talk? I'm sure all of you have. How many of you are conscious of your breathing? Mindful of your breathing? I don't think so, any of us. How many of you use an Apple Watch? Any of you here? And do you know that on an Apple Watch there's a facility which gives you, giving you reminders after every 1 hour? Time to breathe. Yeah, if you use an Apple Watch, you know that it gives you a reminder after every 1 hour, time to breathe and focus and be mindful of your breathing. Ladies and gentlemen, none of us in the last 1-odd hour of, shall I say, through the day have been conscious of our breathing. Now imagine when you start breathing and you just keep breathing in and in and in and then, and then, can you live? No. And imagine if you start breathing out and you breathe out and you breathe out and you breathe out and you breathe out and you breathe out, can you live? No. Can you imagine how life is fashioned in such an incredible, sophisticated, refined rhythm? The rhythm of breathing. When we talk about life, we talk about the rhythm of breathing. We're so unconsciously— this taking in and this giving out, this taking in and this giving out. If we just keep taking in, we choke up, and if we just keep giving out, we choke up. What an incredible balance life has to teach us. What an incredible rhythm simply our breathing has to teach us. That life can't just be a life of takers where we just keep taking, taking, just taking, or taking. Nor can life be just giving, giving, giving, giving. The rhythm of breathing gives us an incredible message: take in to give out. Have to share, grab, to care. That incredible balance, that incredible equation is what makes life amazing. I've done 3 talks in 3 cities in India. Early morning, like about 9-ish, I've spoken in Bangalore in India. After that was over, come to the airport, go to Chennai for another one. Finish that and come back to Mumbai and straight from the airport go to another. I've done 3 talks in 3 cities in a day. What do you— if I snap, well, you're technically right, I did. But you're practically wrong, ladies and gentlemen. I don't snap like that. You can interact with me all the time. I don't snap like that. But I'm a human body and a human machine. In your relationships, ladies and gentlemen, I make a humble appeal to all of you and beg of you. Life is short, it's very short. Don't mess up with people, the closest people to you. Give time to them and understand them. They may be to you, they may have said something here and there, and you may be technically right. Okay, look at the hidden Mango. Yes, your husband or your wife may not love you, and that's technically right, but there may be a hidden mango. Why? Find that out before you brand them. Your son or daughter may not listen to you, and you may be completely technically right that they don't obey you, but find out the hidden mango. Why are they doing what they are doing? They are doing that is clear. Everybody knows it. It doesn't need two pence worth of common sense. Is it rocket science to understand that? Is it rocket science to understand he's not behaving right? Any damned fool can understand it. It needs intelligence and maturity to go behind the technical rightness and look for the practical rightness. It needs maturity and wisdom to start seeing behind the scene, to say, why is this person not loving me? Why is this person behaving me like that? Why is this person not treating me right? And if you do that, believe me, hand on my heart, your love for whoever you love will go so deep, and your relationship with whoever you relate to will be so profound because it's based on maturity, not judgmentalism. There are 5 levels of people. On level 1, the lowest level, in the world is a person who only sees bad in others. For heaven's sake, that guy just cannot see any good. Anyone here like that? I don't think so. We're not so bad that we just can't see any good. Some people just can't see any. You know, it's like when you like someone, even if the guy does the biggest crime, you say, 'No, marudi kuro che, aaja.' You like him. But when you don't like someone, even if he does the best thing, you don't like him. And if you have that experience, if you just don't like someone, even if he has all the good qualities, you just can't like him. There are some people on the lowest level, they only focus on the bad, they can't see the good. A level higher are those who see the good and the bad but conveniently ignore the good and focus on the bad. How often it happens when we live with people, there's so many good things in them, but conveniently we neglect the good things and only focus on the bad. My husband digs the nose. Okay, he digs his nose, but he also does many other good things. How come you forgot all of those and only— how come you only saw that? How come you only saw that? You know, we conveniently neglect the good and focus on the bad. The third category of people are those who see good and bad equally, and they're neutral. They're not concerned— good, bad— they're in their own world. The fourth category are those who see the good and bad. They choose to ignore the bad or deal with the bad and focus on the good. If you want to like a person, you have to be on level 4. If you want to like a person, if you're on level 2, where you're ignoring the good and focusing on the bad, how will you like that person? And how will that relationship be deep? When you're on level 4, where you choose to ignore the the bad, or if the need be, deal with the bad and focus on the good. And the fifth level is those who only see good. That's God and spiritually enlightened individuals who will only see good in others. Anybody here who's on level 1, only seeing bad, can raise your hand? Nobody. Okay, thank you. Anybody is here on level 5, only seeing good? If you raise your hand, I don't believe you. Oh, sorry, madam, I do believe you. I'm sorry, I didn't see you raise your hand. I was just joking. Sorry, I truly believe you, madam. I didn't see you raise your hand, please. I just happened to say it by thinking nobody is. Thank you, madam. We really appreciate. Can we give a loud round of applause for her? My God, amazing. Okay, now in your close relationships, in your close relationships, how many How many of you find yourself many times stuck at level 2? Level 2 where you kind of look at the bad and forget the good that they have. Thank you. In our relationships, we need to come to level 4. You know, when we're talking about science and spirituality, I feel that I never felt there is a divide or a difference. Right. I feel the purpose is one. When we look at both having the same purpose, which is to unveil the truth. Correct. Science is trying to unveil the truth, right? And spirituality is wanting to unveil the truth. So how are we different in our purpose? Correct. The methodologies may be different. Like in science, I may use, uh, equipment, I mean instruments, and they use telescopes, measurements, I may use so many different things to be able to figure out what that truth is, correct? And I will, yes, I will phenomenally well, correct? So from science and from all what I see, I have facts, not complete facts yet. Which is why it's always evolving. We call it a relative science. It's not an absolute science. Mendeleev's periodic table, right? The values were changing, right? We found out the truth later. We assigned a certain value. He said, sorry sir, this is not what it is. This is the actual value. So it's changing. So could I say that this is it? May not be. If I get an instrument which is better than what I have today, I'll probably explore another layer of that same facet, right? Now that's where I get the facts. Great, I need those facts. When we talk about spirituality, it is giving the purpose of those facts. So we should be working in tandem. Spirituality and science were meant to work in tandem, one looking at unveiling the truth by giving us factual data, and one saying, giving the philosophical side saying, what is the purpose of this data? Correct. What is the purpose of this existence? And both are two important dimensions to the same truth. Absolutely. You know, so I, I feel that's an artificial divide. It's an artificial divide, and, and it's rigidity on both parts, both sides, that we can't come together to sit and say, hey, look, like, like, I'll give you I'll give you an example. Should a doctor— should a doctor repair a car? That's not a skill set. Should a car mechanic try and do an open-heart surgery? No. So if I— this is my area of expertise, let me do that much and not delve into something further. Let somebody else with this other area of expertise come together and let's pull it all together to unveil the truth together, adding our own dimension to it. I want to just offer to you 3 essential principles of gratitude, being mindful and grateful. The first one being recognizing, recognizing all the the wonderful things that have been done to us. Believe me, you, we are in such a, such a rush most of the time, we're not even thoughtful and mindful to recognize the incredible gifts that have been showered upon us. How many of you had loving parents? Most all of us. How many of us feel that we've been receiving so much affection from our parents? Yes. How many of you have loving spouses? You might want to or may not want to raise your hands. That is completely up to you. It's your choice, ladies and gentlemen, whether you want to raise your hands for this. How many of you had wonderful teachers? How many of you had some amazing friends? Great. How many of you come in contact with some wonderful spiritual personalities? Great. And how many of us feel that Our life is a collective sum total of the so many wonderful things that have been done to us by so many in our lives. Show of hands, please. All of us, isn't it? So many of us have been recipients and received so much from our families, from our friends, from our teachers, from saints. I'll tell you something, to be very honest, what the world needs today is transformed individuals. We have a lot of affluence, we have a lot of influence, we have a lot of information. We are in an age which is laden, laden with information. You know, what we truly need is transformed individuals who can utilize what we have for constructive positive causes in the world, who can truly bring light to the world, who can truly bring hope to the world. There's enough information. What we would need is transformation. And what better way but to have a spiritual culture to bring that transformation in individuals? And in fact, I don't want to say it, but I must, that spirituality Spirituality happens to be one of those major ways to bring transformation in an individual. I see so many people following different parts of spirituality and change and transform to not just be a part of competition but be a part of contribution. Along with competition, they're also looking at contribution. Youth is the hope for the world. Youngsters, young men and ladies, are the ones who can change the shape of planet Earth, who can change the way the world functions, bringing an incredible hope and light to the world. I must tell you, oh God, just how the world is. When you are high up, you don't know what to say there. You're not just— I was in America, I was just Once in America in February, I was flying from New York JFK Airport to go to Detroit, and it was an airline called Spirit Airlines. And in the morning they were selling alcohol. So I asked the stewardess, I guess your airline is in very high spirit, you know. They were selling spirits in the morning itself. Oh goodness, turbulence not in control. Takeoff not in control, landing not in control, choice in control. The takeoff of life is our birth, no control. I can't change my looks. I was born the way I was. Some are born in a wealthy family, some are born in a poor family, some are born very smart and handsome, some are not so handsome, some are fair, some are dark, some are green, some are yellow, some are born in the US, some are born in India, Some are born in a Hindu family, some are born in a Muslim family, some are born in Jain family, some are born in Jew families. What control do you have over the takeoff? Did you choose your mothers and fathers? Do you have any control? No control at all. And in the landing? Death? There's tremendous hope in life. God is the greatest hope in life. You don't have to be hopeless. Failure is not the end of the world. Someone insulting you is not the end of the world. A health crisis is not the end of the world. A divorce, a breakup is not the end of the world. And the turbulence is in your control. Problems during the journey of your life, from birth to death, takeoff to landing, As the journey of your life goes, there's clouds, there's wind speeds, tremendous turbulence which is completely beyond your control. Are people in your control? What people say about you behind your back, is it in your control? What people think of you, is it in your control? You can try to be good, but can you control people? In New York, when I was there recently, one guy came up to me after my talk and said, you are the egoistic person, most egoistic person I've ever seen. I don't even know him. I am a human being. Even I have feelings and emotions. Can't just come and slap you on your face. And I won't even use the words he used against me, straight on my face. And then wrote a wrong email to me. That email is on my phone, just in case you feel I'm lying, you can come and check out. God bashing me with words like, oof, what What can I do? I have no control. When a health crisis comes, cancer happens to someone for no fault of his or hers, what can you do? It's completely out of control. When an examiner asks a googly question in the question paper, you all know What can you do? What can you do? Nothing, right? Therefore, between this journey called birth and death, there's only one thing in our control— our choices. The choices we make are completely in our control. Choice karna bhi mushkil ho jaata hai. Therefore, take advantage of the time in between, you know. And thus I say, when you are born, people love you. And when you die, people love you. In between, you have to manage. Stunning how life is. You know, kind of really amazing how people can be. There was a king who had a pack of 10 wild dogs. He used them to punish all those ministers who committed blunders. One day, one of his ministers made a mistake. The king was furious and passed an order that the minister be thrown to the dogs. Desperate to save his life, The minister pleaded, "Your Majesty, I faithfully served you for 10 years, and in return, is this what you would do to me? But if that's what you want, fine. You may throw me to the dogs. But before doing so, can you please do me a small favor? For 10 years of my service, may I request you to kindly grant me just 10 minutes more days before the dogs tear me off to pieces. The king agreed to the minister's proposal. The minister then approached the guard who was in charge of caring for the dogs and requested that the guard allow him to look after them for the next 10 days. Unaware of the king's order, the guard was a little surprised. Why would a minister Minister want to do this? But being delighted that he would get a break, the guard agreed. The Minister had experience of caring for wild animals from before he had joined the king, and so for the next 10 days, he served the dogs with great love and attention, feeding them, bathing them, cleaning for them, and making them feel very very comfortable. After the 10 days were over, the king ordered that the minister be now thrown to the dogs. When it was done, to the king's and everyone else's amazement, the dogs started licking the feet of the minister. Being baffled by what was happening, the king asked, "What has happened to these dogs? Why don't they attack and kill this minister?" Minister. Before anyone could say a word, the minister instantly replied to the king, Your Highness, I served the dogs only for 10 days, and even in such a short term of service, they did not forget what I did for them. Yet I served you for 10 years, and you very conveniently You can easily forget all that I did for you just because of one mistake that I made in all these years. The king felt ashamed of himself and having learnt a vital lesson in personal dealings, ordered for the minister to be freed and accepted him back in his service. Isn't it a fact that as soon as there is a provocation or a mistake made, or a troubling situation that comes up, we very quickly forget all the good that others have, or the good that others have done for us. Gratitude is firstly about a sharp memory, memory of all the kindness, service, and good that we have received. It is then about action. Reciprocation, showing our goodness by letting go of the one-off blunders that may happen and to positively continue our relationship with others. Let us not wipe off the good that others have done unto us because of small mistakes, situations, or incidents. It can be fun to once in a while revisit your childhood days and relive them. One day I happened to see a remote-controlled helicopter someone had and decided to give it a try. Having lost practice of using a joystick, it was a little hard in the beginning, but in a few attempts I thought I was becoming a pro in flying it. It was then that I remembered how a friend of mine from London had taken me for a ride on his private plane. As we were taking off, I recollect sharing an inspiring quote with my friends on that flight. I had said, 'When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.' Well, the tiny Cessna we were flying in definitely gave us a real-time experience of that quote as it was super wobbly during takeoff. But we had a very smooth landing. Don't they say all is well that ends well? Recently I decided to try a real adventure, the one in which you take off in a plane but don't land in it. Skydiving. The night before, I'm lying in bed visualizing myself jumping off the plane, thinking, what if the parachute doesn't open? What if it opens but malfunctions when we are in the air? What if I have a free fall straight on the ground? Ladies and gentlemen, do you know what's stopping us from taking the take the plunge? Do you know what's stopping us from growth? Two words: what if. What if I fail? What if I lose? What if people mock me? What if he or she says no? What if? What if? What if? What if? Life will pass away and our minds will stop us from realizing our truest and fullest fullest potential. That night, I decided to confront my what-ifs and shut my mind up. I asked myself, do you want the experience of jumping off a plane? Yes, came the answer from within. Then no what-ifs. Whatever happens, be ready for it, I said to my mind. To make sure it was not an uncalculated risk, I decided to evaluate the risk factor. When I checked the statistics of skydiving casualties on Google, it was 13 fatalities in 3.3 million skydives last year, way less than the car accidents that took place last year. But what if I happened to be one amongst the 13. My mind protested again, "Then lie down here in bed snoring and being a couch potato, missing the exhilarating experience in your life," I told my mind. As I drifted away into sleep, crossing the crippling boundary of what-ifs, I remember I remember telling myself, "Look, darling, your skydiving support tomorrow is an expert. He has had several years of experience with thousands of skydives and not a single casualty to his record. Relax, take it easy." The next day, as the doors of the plane opened at 18,000 feet above sea level, ground level. I was ready, telling myself, I want to do it, I can do it, I will do it. I remember standing at the edge of the plane door, now fearlessly looking down, and then we jumped. That free fall was the most liberating experience of my life. Liberation from the two paralyzing words What if, as we floated in the air, feeling light like never before, the parachute opened? And I thought to myself, today the parachute is opened and so has my mind. Open your minds, face those things that are holding you back, cross the limiting boundaries of your what-ifs. Believe me, an amazing life waits ahead on the other side of our depths. Tell you something, how many of you know this guy? I'm not too sure if you know him. This gentleman is one of the finest violin players on planet Earth. His name, Joshua Bell. His violin costs $4 £1 million, ₹2 crore, his violin costs. That's the worth of his violin. Joshua Bell. Washington Post, they decided to do an experiment. They put Joshua Bell— whenever Joshua Bell would perform concerts People would have to pay anywhere in the range of $300 to $500 for an hour to listen. Panch so dollar, char so dollar concert ka fees. Char char so, panch panch so dollar dekh ke jake violin ka concert sunta hai. Ek kante ke liye. You know, they put him in a subway. Apne underground station hota hai? Put him on the subway and asked him to put a simple jeans, t-shirt, and put a cap. So he stood in the subway and he performed some of the most amazing gigs. That's how he played incredible pieces, masterpieces. And Washington Post did a research to see within an hour's time of his playing, how many people stopped by How many people passed by him? How many people stopped by to hear what he had to play? And how much money did he earn? 1,097 people. 1,097 people passed by during this music that he was playing in the one hour in the subway. Ready to hear how many actually stopped to listen to him? Any wild guesses? 7 people out of 1,097 people. His concert halls would be full all the time. 7 people stood there. And guess how much money he got in the hat? A ticket, $32 in 1 hour. And Washington Post just explored to see what had happened. It was the evening hour. Everyone was in a rush. When you're in a rush, and you go too fast in life, you cannot have a spiritual experience. This is why press a pause in your 20s to 30s. Every now and then, press a pause, introspect, relish things in life. The best things to relish are the simplest things in life, not the complicated iPhone X. What really is important is in the world today, we are talking a lot about wellness. Physical wellness is spoken about, mental wellness is spoken about, emotional wellness is spoken about. I don't hear a lot of people talking about professional wellness, you know. And when we're talking about professional wellness, I'm not just talking about somebody who's doing well professionally. There's a difference between doing well and feeling well, right? Doing well is your expertise that takes you to the heights of your success and achievements, pays you well. But feeling well is you love what you do and you enjoy what you do. And a huge chunk of people out there are doing well not sure if they are feeling well. So back in the day when I was with Hewlett-Packard, I was thinking to myself that I'm doing well, being paid well, but am I feeling well with my work? I'm going to have to spend 90,000 hours doing this stuff. And there was a big fat no that came out of my mind. I'm good at it, but I don't think I'm cut cut for this. Obviously, the next question that came in my mind was then, what am I cut for? Absolutely not. And that's when I realized that for me, my passion was not so much to work with systems and machines as an engineer. My passion was to work with people, to explore life, to understand life, help people with their lives. The one way to go about it was to probably study psychology, but then I also had a spiritual calling. So I thought, why not explore my own spiritual calling and see if I have answers to life and dealing with life in spiritual philosophy and wisdom, which can then help people as well. But that's what made me take that plunge and switch over from— or shall I say, upgrade from electrical engineering to lifestyle engineering. I might say it You might say that, you know. Now, and it's very fulfilling. It's been 25, 26 years. No regrets so far, touch wood. It's been very fulfilling. The journey has been incredible, very satisfying. I also want to say one thing, that I took a risk. Yes, you know, when you take that plunge, leaving the secure and going to the insecure, moving from the certain to the uncertain, moving from the road that's taken to the road less traveled, right? You take a risk, and I feel I took an uncalculated risk. It was uncalculated. You didn't know what was coming ahead. But when the passion inside of you is burning so powerfully, it's like a guy in love with a girl. It's just burning so much, it's irresistible. It's irresistible. When I do tell people, I say that, look, don't take such kind of risks though, because you have real life issues, financial liabilities, mortgages to pay, terminally ill patients at home often, right? And you, you need to look at that side. And if you take that plunge and just jump straight away into following your passion just so that you feel well, that's right, you may not be able to address this real life. Absolutely. I, I tell a lot of youngsters who come to me for advice about writing, I say, look, the, the early days when I got into the world of writing, I was writing in the middle of the night, but I was still putting in a full day of work. And, uh, so my one piece of advice to them is usually don't lose the day job because it's very difficult to write when you're hungry, you know. But you did precisely that. You quit the day job. I did, and that's what I don't advise. I'm saying keep your day job to do well so your financial needs are addressed, but also pursue your passion and what you love to do so that you feel well. And maybe one day your feel well will also be your mainstream profession. Who knows? How many of you could cook? Okay, a little bit. How many of you love cooking? How many of your cooking is disastrous? Like, terrible, terrible is an understatement. Oh, if you cook a little bit, you know, chonk is fantastic. And one thing I love, like about chonk is kadipatta. How many of you enjoy putting kadipatta in the chonk? And mustard seed, rye. When you see all the ingredients of the chonk, all the ingredients of the chonk are so different and so diverse, right? Rye, dal, temperature, but You put salt. Salt will give taste to the preparation and always remain in the background. And if you are Gujarati, then you have some sugar and chhonk. And if you sometimes you add chili. Every place of the part of the body is on fire. Every place of the body is on fire. But so diverse, isn't it? So different. But All these ingredients have only one purpose together: to make the preparation tasty and delicious. You eat your You eat your poha, you eat your misal, any damn preparation, it's the chonk that gives it that exclusive flavor. But such diverse ingredients, that's how relationships are— very diverse. Don't expect your husband, wife, parent, child, friend to be the same. Diversity is what makes life beautiful. Relationships are like In India, in a place called Bihar, a small little place called Patna, there's a guy who studied in high school there and came out of Patna to become a big business giant. And once he returned back to Patna, and when he got back to Patna, he thought, let me go see one of my school friends whom I was with in school studying for about 8-9 years. He went to see his school friend. The place where his school friend lived was, you know, small narrow lanes. So he's a businessman now, he couldn't drive in his car, so he parked the car outside, decided to walk walk into the lane, he heard that his school friend whom he studied with for several years in school had turned out to be a priest in a temple because his father was a priest. They had not met for a long time, so he went to see his friend who was now a priest. And firstly, the friend didn't even recognize the guy, you know, he's a big businessman still the priest. And then they kind of got up and started talking, and they started sharing their hearts and catching up for whatever long time had been gone on. And then this priest, looking at this new friend who had come after a long time, not even knowing what he's doing, not even knowing where he lives, not even knowing that he's a businessman, said to him, hey, look, you're now living in a big city. If just in case you want to do something and start something and you need some financial help. I've saved up these ₹25,000 from a long time. I'd like to give it all away to you to start business, this business. And this businessman was a friend. God, his heart was touched. This man, all he has is ₹25,000, and these ₹25,000, he's willing to give it all away to me. This businessman, it made such an impact on the heart of this businessman that on CNBC, this businessman was being interviewed by one of his friends whom I just met this evening here, right here, was interviewing this businessman. And after asking the sutras for his success, asked this businessman, would you like to share the story? And this businessman shared the story with a grateful heart, remembering His memory hadn't gone weak. He remembered that this guy had offered me this ₹25,000 to start something, a venture, and that's all he had. Who with deep gratitude remembered this man in his memory that he was off willing to give. Ladies and gentlemen, gratitude is about memory, about remembering what people have done for us, remembering what people do for us, how they come forth to help us. And so many have done that for us. If I get to be in front of every kid in every school in the world, Evan, the one thing that I would like to teach or tell the students who are listening to me is that we cannot go on extreme sides of the spectrum. One extreme of the spectrum is follow your passion, be yourself, Correct. Which is what I primarily teach as well. Like what Albert Einstein said, you cannot judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, right? You know, you can't judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree. Judge by— that's the fish by its ability to swim in the water. Okay. Now, two things happen in that case. Number one, the fish is effective in doing what it can do because it's in its right habitat. And number two, it's satisfied. Happy because it's in the right habitat, correct? Put a monkey in the water, the monkey is miserable. Put a fish on the tree, the fish is miserable. Put a monkey on the tree, the monkey achieves excellence. Put a fish in the water, the fish achieves excellence. So I'm one of the proponents, I am a proponent of this principle that we must definitely encourage our kids to follow their potential and follow their passion. What happens often is we go on such an extreme end of the spectrum The other side, with what the education system has to offer, is there are many good things in the education system as well. So if I were to talk to the students, I would say let's find that balance, finding best of both the worlds, you know. Grab the best out of what you can have from the education system and let the education system also foster a culture, an ethic, an ethos you know, where we allow kids to be who they are. Reading inspirational and motivational books. And I also think because the online world is so big today, the online platform is so big today, whether it's Facebook, whether it's Instagram, whether it is Twitter, whether it is YouTube, these massive platforms where there's so much material available. So much motivational stuff available, so much inspiration available. As soon as we feel low, we may have our choice speakers, we may have our choice gurus, we may have our choice experts. By listening to whom we feel motivated, by listening to whom we feel uplifted, by listening to whom we feel energized, we should regularly on a proactive basis listen to podcasts, watch videos, or read books that can keep us going. This is of course not when you have— when somebody goes to the extreme end of ending their lives, can't read a book or watch a video there. But that did happen. We posted a video on Facebook, this reposted a video this morning where we were talking about an individual who wanted to give up his life in in Cincinnati, Ohio, in the United States of America. He was a university student, and as he was in that moment of committing suicide, hanging himself, his head is in the noose, and there was a notification on his phone, a WhatsApp notification. The guy happened to see that notification. It happened to be one of the videos we had made, and he watched those videos for 4 to 8 hours non-stop, all online stuff available. From our channels online and decided I shouldn't commit suicide, decided to keep going. Which is why I think that the third thing to boost our coping mechanism is to look at online motivational material as well. It's a proactive thing to constantly keep looking for good material so that you feel inspired, motivated. Challenges and problems are going to be there for everybody, like I said earlier. We'll be stronger to face that. Excuse me, is it okay if I sit here? You can if you like. Are you all right? I'm fine, thank you. Don't be a crybaby. Throw that book away and come and play football with us. Come here now, prove yourself. Does every guy have to play football? Do men not I'm sorry about what these boys are doing to you. Are they your classmates? And what's your name? I'm John, and yes, these boys are in my class. They bully me all the time just because I don't play football, just because I don't like sports, just because I'm different. Is it wrong to be different? Not at all. We are all different. Our likes and dislikes likes and dislikes are different. We're gifted in different ways. Some can play sports, some can write, some can sing, and yet others can act. Look at that toolbox, John. Each tool is so different, each one serving such a different purpose. What if all the tools in the box were jack saws? Who would tighten the screws? Who would put the nail in in place. Who would make the surface of the wood smooth? To finish the job, the carpenter needs the jigsaw, the screwdriver, the hammer, and the planer. Like the tools, we are all different and have our respective roles to play, and each of us gets to show our talent when the time comes, and no one else can do what we can. No one can contribute in the unique way that we can. You love writing. Continue to do so. Yes, it's okay for men to write poems or to cook or to dance if that's what they love and if that's what they are gifted with. Does that make sense? Surely it does. Thank you so much for your guidance, sir. You're welcome. I must continue my walk now. Have a great day, John, and all the best with your writing. An artist once came to a king who was a great admirer of art and said, 'Oh king, if you give me a blank wall in your palace, I can create a spectacular painting on it.' Just then, another young man was present there, said to the king, 'Your Majesty, please allow me to work on the opposite wall as well. I am an artist too. The king asked the young man, and what would you like to make? The man said, I shall make an exact replica of the painting that the other artist makes on the wall opposite to mine, and I shall do so without even looking at his work. I would request you to place a thick curtain between the two walls so that neither of us can see the other's work, and also have guards to make sure there's no cheating. Everyone in the court, including the king, was intrigued, and the king decided to give both artists the opportunity to show their talent. The following day, A thick curtain was put in place, and both the artists started their work. The first artist brought paints and oils and brushes that he worked with. The second one worked simply with a cloth and a bucket of water. After a month, the first artist told the king, that his work was complete. And when the king asked the second artist when would his work be done, the young man replied that he was done too. The king came to the palace and went on to see the first artist's work. He was stunned by the spectacular painting and gave the artist a hefty sum of money. A sum as a reward. He then asked for the curtain to be opened up to see if the second artist had met up with the challenge of creating the exact same painting without seeing it. The curtain opened, and lo and behold, on the opposite wall was an exact replica of the painting. Every single line, Every single color, every minor detail was exactly as it was on the first wall. The king rewarded the man with double the amount of money, but being amused, wanted to know his secret. The young artist replied, "It was very simple, Your Majesty. I just polished the marble-worn every day until it shone like a mirror to reflect the painting on the opposite wall. Often people come up to me and complain that they lack confidence, that they don't think they have any talent, that they lack motivation. And I tell them that all of these are a part of you. The hard work is cleaning the wall of your mind. In a way that what's hidden deep within you— your talent, your positivity, your confidence, your goodness— is reflected in your mind and thus in your actions. And then you can indeed achieve something spectacular. Don't they say that the soul knows how to heal itself? The challenge is to to silence the mind. And one of the ways to silence the mind's negative chatter is to neglect it. Sometimes a little child who gets just a little hurt starts crying aloud. If the mother pays attention, the child cries louder. But if she ignores the child, knowing well that there's nothing serious, the child's crying slowly dies down. Exactly in the same way, if we pay attention to the negative chatter of the mind, it gets louder. But if we try to ignore it, it slowly dies down. And how does one ignore that chatter? By absorbing the mind in positive energy. Reading, hearing, or watching positive stuff, hanging out with positive people. And then, as the mind becomes slowly cleansed, the beautiful painting within you will be reflected on it. A friend of mine is a great cook. One day he was making a preparation from okra, also known as lady's finger in some parts of the world. I saw him wash and clean each of the okra pods with a lot of attention and affection. I guess because he loved cooking. To be honest, I was impressed with how sensitive he was even in his dealings with vegetables. As he was expertly cutting the okra into equal-sized pieces for his prep, he happened to see a hole in the top portion in one of the pods. Guessing that the particular pod was spoiled, I assumed that he would throw it away. Instead, with meticulous attention and precision, he He removed the top portion from the pod using his knife, and after checking that the rest of the pod was fine, continued cutting it to be used for the delicacy he was about to prepare. I learned a very important lesson from this simple interaction. If there be a hole in one of the pods, Some may, but many, especially here in India, will not reject the entire pod. They would carefully deal with the spoiled part by removing it and use the rest of the pod which is still in a perfect condition. If we don't even reject an okra pod entirely just because it has a hole in it, and an okra a pod is probably only a few cents worth. Should we reject people and our relationships, which are priceless, simply because of some faults that they may have? Don't human beings deserve similar or better treatment? Ladies and gentlemen, no human being is perfect and will most certainly have have some defects and limitations. Let us learn to follow the okra principle in our relationships. Let us not brand people and reject them for their flaws. Let us accept them for their good side, and let us expertly and skillfully deal with their weaknesses, uplifting them and helping them to give their best. Isn't it sad that anyone could find the dirt in others, be the one that finds gold? What does someone like you do to meditate? How do you meditate? When I came to the monastery, the meditation I was taught was mantra meditation, which is chanting on beads. So I chant a mantra. And as I began the process, I realized how challenging it was to be present into the sound of the mantra and to be totally in a space, in a zone of thoughtlessness where there's nothing bothering your mind and you're completely present and listening to the sound and totally absorbed. You know, in the sound. I realized that it was a massive uphill task. And I think it comes— that the challenge comes from the fact that we've got so used to multitasking that our mind functions on 20 tracks. So when we're just on the meditation track, there are 19 other tracks to deal with. Yeah. You know, you have your personal life, you have relationship issues, you have professional issues. With so many things going on, issues coming from family, so much going on in the country, there's so much that's occupying our mental space. And when you actually want to get onto the track of meditation by kind of just putting all of this in the back seat, it becomes practically impossible. And a lot of people tell me this. And when they're trying to meditate, this is what happens to them. And I share my journey with them. This is exactly what happened to me when I started. It's been 25 years now, every single day without one day's gap, 1.5 hours every day. And I, and I tell them that it's not that it's not a challenge today. It would be very high-headed to say that, okay, I've reached a state of enlightenment when I sit for meditation, everything's kind of there and I'm totally absorbed. Very high-headed, I feel, to say that. But I did a few things that I feel can benefit those who want to to really get into that, a deeper state of meditation. I, I look at meditation in two ways. A is the meditation meditation, as in the practice, and B is everything that we do in our life as meditation, you know. And I prefer to work more on everything in my life as a meditation, which feeds into my practice of meditation. But do not neglect the practice. Do not neglect the practice, for sure. So, uh, I'll tell you what I do. For instance, uh, one meal a day I just eat by myself. Two meals I take with my friends, my— some of my monk friends, where we discuss, chat, eat. One meal is just by myself, the reason being I want to be present, mindful, in the moment, to savor the entire experience of touching, feeling, smelling, tasting that food. I avoid forks and spoons as much as possible because I want to touch and feel that experience of the food. Now, the reason I do it is because it just means no phones, no books, nobody to talk to, and just being there eating. Correct. So what I'm doing is, by just eating that one meal by myself, training my mind to be in the present. Like we are talking now, there's 3 meetings lined up for me tonight, and there's a restaurant called Candy and Greens at Breach Candy. The family is a very close friend, you know, so they've just opened up a new rooftop terrace. I've been getting message after message, could you come down today evening for dinner, right? But it's not on my mind. It's not on my mind. Nothing outside of our conversation between you and me right now is on my mind. So why, why do I do it? It's because right now I'm training my mind to be in the present. When I used to be in the bathroom, I would sing. Like a big thing for me used to be. Of course, earlier I would sing a lot of cinema and movie songs. And now I sing some spiritual songs, bhajans, whatever. And then one day I realized, hey, wait a minute. This is not right. Because neither am I into the singing, nor am I into the experience of bathing. So if I'm singing, I'm missing the experience of bathing. And if I'm bathing, I'm not into my singing. So why am I doing two things at the same time? I stopped singing, just focusing on the experience of the water coming down my body and experiencing that. So to me, these little things through the day matter a lot to me. And I think that's a— that's more of meditation to me, because then what I do here feeds into my mainstream practice of meditation. And what I do here feeds into the little things as well. So it's kind of a loop, one feeding into other. Do any of you remember losing a rank in an exam during your school or college days? I remember losing my first rank in a final exam just by a couple of marks. Does anyone remember losing a job opportunity or a promotion at work and feeling very low about it? I'm sure some of you may may recall losing in a sports event, or maybe losing a role in a theatrical performance, or maybe losing a sought-after position of power. And what to speak of losing a relationship or losing a dear one. As much as losing something or losing someone can be painful, disappointing, and frustrating, it just happens to be a part of our real life in this real world. There are Things in life we end up losing, not because we didn't give our best, or not because we were complacent, because there are forces beyond our scope, beyond our abilities to control. And it's very important that we accept this reality. Never lose hope. The one thing that makes life a painful ordeal is hopelessness. A boy once entered a room where he saw 4 lit up candles illuminating illuminating the space with their soft glow. The first candle spoke to the boy, "I am the candle of love. There was a time when things were used and people were loved. But today, things are loved and people are used to get those things. Nobody values me any longer." Saying this, the candle of love went off. The second candle said, "I am the candle of peace. In a world where everything Everything is being torn down to pieces. Who values peace? And the second candle went off as well. The third candle turned to the boy and said, I am the candle of trust. If there be anything that's really hard to find in a selfish world, it's trust. What's the point in me staying lit up? The little boy started sobbing as he saw the flame of the candle of trust go out. Light go off and the room getting darker. The fourth candle spoke in a reassuring tone, "Don't cry, my boy. I am the candle of hope. As long as I am lit, there'll never be darkness. Things may be dim but never dark. As long as I am lit, you can pick me up and light the other three candles of love, peace, and trust and brighten the room up again." The boy wiped his tears and with a smile lighting up his face, lit up the room as he lit the 3 candles with the candle of hope. Ladies and gentlemen, no matter what you lose in life, never lose hope. How do people find that thing? How do you recommend when there's a lot of family pressure on them, how did they find the thing? I find a lot of times it's an issue with the system. Like, for example, the industry The corporate world is only picking up people from the top-rated universities. The industry is only picking up students who have the best grades. Now, if you have people who are being picked up based on your university or based on your grades and your marks and your academic performance, then guess what parents are going to put— pressurize kids with? You better get the marks, you better get the grades, you better get to the best university. And guess what the educational institutions do? It's a demand and supply system. If the demand of the industry is grades and the parents are pushing to get grades, the educational systems are driven to make kids get grades. Now imagine if the industry changes and the corporate world redefines and we don't hire grades, we hire passion, we hire candidates for their passion. Correct. Now, what are the parents going to say? Don't worry about the grades, son, look at your passion. And what is the education system going to provide? How to look at your passion. Correct. It's a— at the end of the day, it's about the demand and supply, really, you know. So in terms of how does a kid, or how does an individual figure that out for himself or herself, number one is there is a voice from within us, correct? And there's a voice from within us that's constantly resonating with our soul, saying I love this, you know. I may be great at it, or I may not be great with it, either or, whichever way. But I love this. I'm in absolute love with this. I can wake up early in the morning to do this, and I can go to bed like late in the night if I were doing this. I know that that's what it's really in sync with my soul, you know. Now what happens with that is sometimes it's multiple things. It's 3, 4, 5 different things for people. Right. And now, if that be the case, that be the case, then I think it's also over a period of time we need to funnel it down, to narrow it down to that one thing. It's like, it's like being in love, right? A guy or a girl is in love with somebody, there's 3, 4 different people they're trying and seeing, and they're kind of exploring, but it's one person who like really, really strikes that chord. So one thing is to listen to your inner conscience constantly. People who are not in tune with their inner radar are not going to be able to find out what their passion is. They're living a life only catering to the outside demands and not introspecting, not going deep to listen to your conscience and your inner voice. Where's the question of figuring out what the passion is? You have to see what resonates with your soul. There is a great need that all of us start practicing spirituality. Spirituality not only declutters our mind— meditation, mindfulness— chanting, prayer doesn't simply declutter our mind of the anxieties or pressures that we go through, of the stress that we go through. And not only does it uplift our spirits when we feel low and depressed, I think a spiritual process gives us tremendous resilience and gives us tremendous fortitude, gives us tremendous inner strength to stand strong in the midst of all storms. And therefore, one of my favorite quotes, which I've very often brought up in our live sessions, is: pain is inevitable, misery or suffering is optional. What happens to us, we can't stop that. The factors beyond us. But how we take what happens to us is completely in our hands. I think the pudding I tasted before the monastery was a pudding of great achievements. Okay. I've been a university topper practically every semester, seen the best. I'm a vocalist, I'm a guitarist. So when you enter into an auditorium full of people, you know, you start singing, start striking some chords on the guitar. Academically, you're doing well. Picked up by Hewlett-Packard for a great job. So tasted the pudding of achievements, tasted the pudding of control, power, power, tasted the pudding of people respecting and bending down when you're up there, right? You're popular in that sense. And then I come to the monastery. And it's quite amazing. I tasted the pudding of all of this. And I moved into the monastery with that baggage, with that ashram that here I am an academic success, here I am a corporate success, here I am ABC XYZ. And I come into the monastery and you're surrounded by 30 other monks who are either the similar age as you are, older to you. And each one of them from excellent academic institutions. Probably some of them were gold medalists in their field, had great corporate experience, and now spiritual experience. And when I entered into the monastery, the pudding I tasted first was humility. It was more forced humility because you're coming with a baggage that you're someone, and you enter into that space and you realized, hey, I thought I was someone, And suddenly the whole bubble bursts open, cracking the bubble open, you know. And then I, my, with good training from my Guru and the other monks around there, I learnt how humility is such an incredible quality for one's spiritual growth, personal growth, professional growth. In any space you want to grow, humility is such an incredible foundational premise, you know, because humility entails that you kind of accept or you say that I know that I don't know it all. You know, true knowledge is knowing you know nothing. Knowing that you don't know it all. Ego says I know it all and humility says I know that I don't know it all. Humility says I know I'm good at something, but I'm not the best of everything or everyone in the world. So I enter in there and I realize there's there's so many people around who are way better. And that acceptance that they are better paved the way to learning, you know. Like, don't they say if you think you're the best person in the room or the smartest person in the room, you're probably in the wrong room? I think what's happening a lot with our lives today is that we're living in a very fast-paced life. Life has become very fast. Achievements, social media statuses, you know, how— what's our status on social media, how we achieve in our professional life. It's so much about having that we forget living, you know. And life is not meant simply for having. Having is a part of life, correct? But living is what life is for. But in the process of having and chasing to have more, we forget to live well. You know, and therefore when we're talking about this monk principles or we are talking about this monk mindset, we are talking about making that choice and prioritizing to live well. And when we talk about living well, we talk about making those choices. We choose to live well, we choose to do things. And I feel that one of the greatest assets that each one of us has been gifted with is the power to craft our life, to choose to craft our life. To choose to sculpt our life. We are the architects of how our life should be. But unfortunately, we live so much in the default mode. Like, it's funny, you know, when we're talking about our iPhones, we don't keep our ringtones in the default mode. We customize them. When we wear clothes, we don't wear clothes that come in the default mode. We customize them. Even our pizza toppings, Customize them. So it's quite funny that we as human beings customize practically everything we have and do, but we live our life in the default setting without customizing it. You know, each one of us is different, each one of us has a different situation in life, each one of us has different backgrounds, different baggages we carry. And it's so crucial and important to customize a life a life that's worth living, you know. So one thing that I definitely want to say, people who are not going to go to the ashram— and nobody needs to, monkhood is not about being in an ashram— definitely need to look at prioritizing how to customize their life. And that's then about making those choices. Every individual has problems. You can have two people who go through the exact similar crisis. It could be academic, it could be financial, it could be professional, it could be emotional, They go through the exact same crisis. One thrives and the other goes into a downward spiral of negativity, depression, anxiety, frustration. And I know problems can make us utterly helpless. We are helpless sometimes after trying everything we could to resolve those issues. We know There are certain problems which are just absolutely beyond our control and we are helpless. The problem is not helplessness. The problem is when that helplessness leads to hopelessness. Ladies and gentlemen, it's not helplessness that makes us depressed. It's not helplessness that makes us frustrated. It is that helplessness that leads to hopelessness. We are not able to see that ray of hope, when you are not able to see that ray of light, we are not able to see the light coming at the end of the dark tunnel that we are passing through. It's that hopelessness that creates tremendous emotional pressure on us. And therefore, what truly differentiates two individuals is their coping mechanism. Mental health is about how do we have an internal coping mechanism in a way that we don't allow these challenges to get to us. Let's not look at viewpoints from any particular lens, right? Let us look at life and spirituality as a process of learning, right? And when we are talking about a process of learning, there's no learning without questioning. Doesn't matter what faith, doesn't matter what background. If spirituality, if religion is a process of education, right, and learning, I'm not too sure if education and learning would happen without questioning and a dialogue. A dialogue, right? I remember, I think, was it I thought it was Isidor Rabi was his name, physicist, if I'm not wrong. This gentleman got a Nobel Prize. Okay. And the reporters asked him, they said, they asked him, said, sir, you are now a Nobel laureate, you have a Nobel Prize, so what made you different from all the children in your neighborhood? You come from a Jewish background. Jewish background, from the Judaic tradition, all friends, all from the same neighborhood. What made you a physicist, whereas they're probably lawyers or whatever else? How did you stand out to be a physicist or a scientist? Uh, Isidore replied, he said, uh, they are doing exceedingly well and they're doing very well. They're still amazing. They're my good friends, he said. And then he said, every single time, all of these kids were friends, were in the same school, we studied in the same school, some were in the same class, same grade. Said when we came back home, most of my friends, when they got back home, their mothers would ask them, did you answer the teacher's questions right today? And he said, whenever I got I got back home, my mom said to me, did you ask intelligent and right questions to your teacher today? Wow, absolutely. Because education, learning is an evolution, and that evolution is not possible without questioning, right? Reckless questioning is something that we may abandon, you know. Reckless questioning meaninglessly is something that be that all of us would agree to that. But genuine question, questioning for clarification, for understanding. In fact, I, I tell people, please don't accept what I'm saying. You challenge me on what I'm saying, right? Challenge me, because it's an education. It's the process of education and learning. Otherwise, it's blind faith, right? I'm saying it, so you're accepting it, right? So I feel therefore religion can be questioned, it should be questioned. I, I'm not saying religion, religion. I'm saying if it's a process of education, questioning and learning must be a part of it, right? If this is my academic material education, is my degrees I get, religion is meant to offer me spiritual education. And if it's a part of spiritual education, how can education be without questioning? When you write, you will most certainly end up making mistakes. What's truly great is that right behind you is attached an eraser, and you can actually correct that mistake and once again write the right thing. Ladies and gentlemen, even in our lives, we make so many mistakes. And what's amazing is God has given us the opportunity, the chance to erase them, to correct them, and to rewrite our stories. We all make mistakes. I remember I once went for a program and a gentleman came to me and said, "Prabhuji, I'm your fan." I said, "Why?" He said, "Your talks are really inspiring, especially the jokes." I said, "What about the points, man?" He said, "The points are good, but the jokes are great." I said to him, "Come on, all the jokes are only meant to really pass on the message and drive home the point." And just as we were talking, a little boy came running, and I said, "Your son, right?" He said, "Yeah." And just following the boy came a lady. I said, "Your daughter, right?" And the man turned blue, and the lady was like all smiles, ear-to-ear smile, because she was not his daughter. She was actually his wife. The guy turned to his wife and said, "Prabhuji ko jada seriously nahi leneka? Hum ko jokes marne ka baad aata hai." Oh my God, I realized God had made a big big mistake there by asking if it was his daughter when she was actually his wife. We all make mistakes. Now, anyone who comes to me with people around, I never ask whether this is your son or daughter or wife or father or mother. I just ask, can you kindly introduce me to everyone, please? Simple, isn't it? Yes, we make mistakes. We should learn from those mistakes. Erase them, correct them, and never repeat them. Everybody looks for solutions to problems, isn't it? That's a big, big thing that's stopping us from experiencing happiness. That's a big thing that's stopping us from making happiness happen. Who is it that doesn't want to make happiness happen? It's problems that's stopping It could be a health problem, could be a financial problem, could be a relationship problem, could be a business problem. Anything stopping you from crafting your habits. We all want to do it. All want the solutions to these problems, isn't it? There's no lock in the world that was created without a key. Not a single lock in the world was created without a key. I don't know why would somebody make a lock without a key. Every lock that was made was created with a key. And so every problem, every challenge, every issue that's there in our life which is like a lock and seems like a deadlock and dead end has a key. It's not seen now, it's not visible to us right now. Don't know where the key is. We're all searching for that key. How do I get a solution to that problem? You know what? Every lock comes with a key and every problem with a solution. Some of your problems can actually be solved and some of your problems literally cannot be solved, but can be solved by becoming stronger to face them. That's the key. That's the key. You know, what do you do when you have a mentally challenged child born to you? A child with special needs born to you? What do you do? Is there a solution? Can't rewire things, right? Can't rewire things. But the solution then, there is a solution, there is a key. But the key is not that this will change. The key is you will have to grow stronger to face it and solve that problem. Hain na? Aur issiliye har samasya ke nahin ji, do problem do solutions hoten hai. Ya toh bhag lo, ya bhag lo. Right? There's only two things you can do. Ya toh bhag lo, run away. Ya bhag lo, participate, face it, deal with it. Shh! Kya karene? Which is why a lot of times I say, just because someone is happy and just because someone is smiling doesn't mean they don't have issues. Doesn't mean they don't have problems. Doesn't mean they don't have challenges. Just because koi muskurara hai, just because koi apne life mein khush hai, is ka matlab ye nahi ke unki problems nahi hai. Is ka matlab ye nahi ke unki life mein challenges nahi hai. Is ka matlab ye nahi ke unki life mein difficulties nahi hai. The difference is they've chosen to deal with whatever they can do with their problem, they deal with it, but they've chosen to shift their attention to something else in their life. Look, your attention is always on your problem and only problems are on your mind, constantly just occupied by issues, problems, challenges, the difficulties, the troubles, the emotional hurt, the wounds that have happened. How are you going to make happiness happen with all of that going on? We have to do what we have to do to deal with it. When people smile and are happy, that doesn't mean they don't have problems in life. They've just chosen to shift their attention to something that can make happiness happen. And both are exclusive. One doesn't cancel another. I've been a pampered boy, you know, middle-class family but only son. I had a younger sister, but the only son from a Marwadi Jain family. So, you know, like really pampered. Everything I wanted was given, everything I asked for was right there. A kind of spoiled brat in that sense, you know. I never— Ranveer, I never ever in my life ate a meal at home if it wasn't made according to what I'd asked for. So I only ate at home if what I asked for was cooked, right? And I come here to the ashram, to the monastery, and I can't choose my meals. Whatever is cooked in the community kitchen and is served to everybody, I'm going to have to eat that, right? And trust me, back in the day, our ashrama monastery didn't have enough money. So 5 days a week, they got the same vegetable, the cheapest one. And that was the curry with some rice and dal. And initially my mind was like rebelling. I come from a family where I'm pampered. You know what I mean, right? And then I come here and everything's like, I have to just conform. I have to just eat whatever is available. And then I realized, what did I come here for? Did I join the monastery or the ashram for luxurious, fine, palatable food? Or did I come here for a purpose which is much larger than these little things around my life? And then the more I started tuning into my sense of purpose, something way higher than these little things around, I realized that those things weren't bothering me that much, you know. Not to say that they didn't bother me at all, that would be haughty to say that it didn't bother me at all, but they didn't bother me as much because now my attention was on something that I came in here for. So I always tell people, especially the youth, Don't allow your minds to be distracted from what your purpose is, what your goal is. All what you go through, as in the ups and downs you experience, is only an outcome of taking your eyes off your goal, you know. So the lack of facility shouldn't depress us, and the presence of luxury and facility shouldn't distract us. So then there was lack of facility Today there is abundance of facility in our monastery in Anarshan. We live in South Mumbai, downtown, right? We're surrounded by luxury all over the place, you know. So then back in the day there was nothing, and today there's so much. But because the attention is on the purpose, at that time I learned from my training and from my experience there that, uh, I could actually take a lot in my stride Because I kept shifting my attention to what I was meant to do. Which was what? Which was A, to deepen my own spiritual calling, and B was to see how to strategize to share that spiritual experience with the world, you know. So it kept bringing my attention constantly to that. So if you want to decode my learning from this, the monastic order my spiritual path, particularly for the youth, say keep your attention and focus constantly on what you're meant to do in life, which basically means there's a need to discover what you want to do in life. If you haven't discovered, the smallest trivia can disturb you. And if you've discovered and you're focused on that, the largest setbacks can be handled and you can take it in your stride. We're so much conditioned to doing things the way The world does it. There are standards of what is success, the standards of what is cool, the standards of what's socially acceptable. But, but is your life cool? Have you chosen to live that way, or is that noise and that influence making you live that way? And most often, if not always, it has a lot to do with that influence, correct? So I, I'm not saying education is wrong. I'm not saying our upbringing I'm not saying the advice given by our family or our friends or our well-wishers is wrong. I'm just saying we cannot drown in that noise and lose ourselves. It's our lives. It's our life. They're not going to live it for us, you know. All those people who accept us because we show ourselves in a certain way on social media don't really come there when we need them the most. So sometimes I say we prioritize our online relationships so much that we forget our offline relationships, the real ones. You know, when— if I meet with an accident, if I'm ill, if I have an issue with my— and financial issue, whatever issue or a problem, you know, people online, they're good, they're good. Those friends on Facebook and Instagram, people who follow, they're good, absolutely good, and with all good intentions. The most they can do is send you a message The most they can do is send you a bouquet of flowers, you know, get well soon messages. And they're great because they're sent with love and intentions, good intentions. They're great. But people who are going to be there around us are the real people, the real relationships. But in being accepted on social media and being accepted by the social standards of success, which I call noise, we get so drowned in that noise that we forget our voice. So that's a conditioning event. You know, that we got so conditioned to live like that, that we don't now want to customize. Which basically means we have to come out of that shell, come out of that loop. We have to crack that conditioning, crack that loop. Ladies and gentlemen, very often we're just carrying and lugging around all these problems, anxieties, challenges, frustrations in our head. And how long can we handle them by ourselves? There is a great need that we, we give a vent to all of our thoughts, feelings, frustrations, anxieties. There's a great need that we speak up. And therefore, I feel one of the greatest assets we can have for great mental health is a very close friend. To whom we can speak our heart. Guys, it could be a girlfriend. I know some of you smiling. Girls, it could be a boyfriend. I know girls, you are giving a coy smile. Men, it could be your wife. Ladies, it could be your husbands. It could be your parents. It could be your siblings. It could be a colleague. But someone who is a dear close friend to whom we can open up. If you find yourself not being valued, don't get angry or frustrated. Know that you're probably in the wrong place. Being judged by people who see tiny parts of you, tiny parts of your life, not the whole you. Or being judged by people who see you for how much is your net worth, how much is your current market value. They see you for what you have. Have, not for who you are. Look for those who go beyond all externals, who have the expert vision to see the true you beyond all your shortcomings and all your faults. Those who can see your true value, your true potential. They will inspire you to do well, to live well, to love, to grow, and to rise in life. Guys, isn't it Isn't it true that every individual has a special sense of worth? All we need is someone who can see that worth in us and make us see that worth in ourselves as well. There's a beautiful Sanskrit verse which says, 'Amantram aksharam nasti.' There's no akshara or letter that cannot be turned into a mantra. 'Nasti mulam anau shadam.' There's no plant, root, herb that is not medicinal. Ayogya purusham nasti. There's no person who's ayogya or unworthy. But you know, guys, what's lacking? Yojakasth tatra durlabhah. What's lacking is an expert who can see the value, the worth in us, and encourage us on our paths. In Mumbai— and this is my favorite story, I tell this all the time, I love it— in Mumbai, Mumbai, India. Sometimes I do this singing events, kirtan. I sing the holy names of Krishna, the Hare Krishna mantra. And sometimes we have like 200 students, all youngsters, all university students. And in this 200 students, about 60 of them are PhD students. It's amazing, all of these PhD students coming and participating. We have 200 of them, all university students. And then I sing like 2 hours. I just sing. I speak, but I also sing. And when I finish singing, then all the students will come and say, "That was amazing, amazing." And believe me, it's hard to take those compliments seriously because they don't understand any music. But anyway, I really kind of respond back and say, "Thank you very much, thank you very much. Really grateful for your kind compliment." I take it because it's out of love. It doesn't matter on the skill or expertise. Very loving, so I say, "Thank you." Thank you. Now one evening we had this kirtan event, singing event, and a special personality came for this event. It was the lady, it was a lady, she was 80 years old. Everybody else is like between 21 and 25, and there's only one lady who's so elderly, she's like 80 years old, and she happened to be the grandmother grandmother of one of our students. She came and she sat there. I mean, what, what's so special if an 80-year-old lady comes and sits for the case? It's okay. She was trained in singing for 35 years. She came and sat there. Now, that day, if I wanted the compliment of the word amazing, it was from her. If she said amazing, sorted. You're sorted. All these kids say amazing, who cares, you know, they don't understand music anyway. But a lady who's trained to sing for 35 years, she says amazing, you made it, you've done it. So usually I sing with the harmonium in front of me, I keep my eyes closed and tight shut for an hour, whatever. I don't open my eyes usually, try to. That day, every few minutes I was I was opening my eyes to see how is she nodding, is she completely involved in the singing, because then you know that, oh, it's going good. After the whole thing was over, the kids were coming and saying, amazing. I said, okay, thank you, thank you. There's only one person I need to hear it, one person today, the 80-year-old grandma who really has 35 years of experience in singing. And the grandson came and said, Prabhuji, Would you like to meet my grandma? I said, yeah, I don't mind actually. Very politely I said, I don't mind actually. And he brought his grandmother to see me and the grandmother came. And as she came there, you know, sometimes you say these things in modesty, you don't mean it at all. Like how many of you said a sorry and not meant it at all? Did you? Have you? Okay, thank you. Have you ever said a thank you and didn't mean it at all? Happens all the time, isn't it? That day I said a statement. It was just artificial modesty. I didn't feel it like that. I didn't feel like that at all. I just said, I said to her, actually, I don't know how to sing well, and I'm actually off the key. In India, they call it basur. I'm off the key, main basur. She said, that's right. Oh my God, that's right! And I'm like completely devastated, devastated. And I'm like thinking, how can anybody say it straight on your face? I mean, you could say Yeah, it was kind of something you can make. I said, I'm off the key and I don't think I can sing. She said, that's right. And then the grandson was standing right there and the grandson started shouting at her, Grandma! I mean, he didn't shout that loud, this is exaggerated. He said, Grandma, did you hear what he's saying? He's saying he's off the key, he can't sing well. She said, that's impossible. If he was off the key and he can't sing well, I wouldn't have sat here for a single minute. Now I was confused. Within one minute, just now she said I can't and now she says I can. And then the grandson turned towards me and said, Prabhuji, she's hard of hearing. She uses a hearing aid and she didn't bring it today. So because your singing was amplified, she could hear, but when you're talking, she can't hear. And therefore sometimes she just has to say, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's dangerous. You just keep saying to anything that anybody says, you know. Now believe me, if I would have judged her by her actions, I would have for my life thought that and branded her her by saying, what a horrible woman, she doesn't know etiquette and, you know, sensitivities in dealings. But when you look at the hidden mango behind, which I didn't know, which is why until you know, don't judge. Until you know, don't brand. Until you know, don't come to a conclusion. There was a young man who tried his level best to clear his exams at university. But he repeatedly failed, and finally he just gave up. Thinking that marriage would be the best way to make him responsible, his family got him married. After the marriage, the man took up a job as a primary school teacher, but due to lack of experience, was mocked by the students. And finally removed by the school authorities in just a few weeks' time. When he returned home that day, his wife wiped his tears and comforted him. She said to him, you can teach young kids only if you've taken formal training or at least have some experience of teaching kids. And for you, you didn't study teaching at university, nor have you dealt with kids earlier. So how would you know how to teach kids? Don't be too sad about it. When God says yes to your prayer, He gives you what you want. But when He says no to your prayer, He has something better for you. Probably there is a better, more suitable job waiting for you out there. Gathering some hope, the man kept trying to find opportunities, and when he did finally find one, he was once again chucked out of the job due to his slowness. Yet again, his wife tried to encourage him by saying, I'm sure there are people who are skilled and experienced at that job, and their experience comes from many years at it. As for you, you were in school trying to teach kids all this while, so how could you acquire the needed skills? Don't worry, when God says no to your prayer, He gives you something better, but when He says wait to your prayer, He gives you the best. The man kept trying his luck with several jobs which never lasted more than a couple of weeks, at best months. Each time he would return back home dejected and depressed and his loving wife would comfort him. Never once was she disappointed or resentful. By the time the man was in his 30s, he'd found his calling and had acquired a flair in languages. He ended up being a counselor in a school for those kids who were challenged in hearing and speaking, and A little later, he opened his own school for specially abled kids. In a couple of years, he set up a chain of stores in different cities and provinces selling apparatus and equipment for the specially abled and went on to become a multi-millionaire. One day, the now rich This man asked his wife, "When I was so negative about my own future, how could you have so much faith in me?" The reply that his wife gave him was simple yet very profound and inspiring. She said, "When a piece of land is not suitable for planting wheat, we should try planting beans. And after all the years of efforts, if beans are not growing well, we should try planting fruits or veggies. And if the vegetation doesn't work, we can scatter buckwheat seeds. These seeds will one day bloom into flowers, and on the very land itself, there will be one seed that will germinate germinate and grow. After having listened to the wife's explanation, the man wept. Her faith in him, her love, her patience, her persistence was actually responsible for the successful empire that they now owned. Ladies and gentlemen, no one in this world is useless. The land may be very fertile, but you may not have figured out your seed yet. It takes a while to figure out what's your seed, what works for you. But once you discover your seed, your passion, your calling, excellence and abundant growth will simply be a consequence. Until then, You need to believe in yourself. More so, you need someone who can believe in you and keep you going till you see your day. Yoga is a process that goes even beyond the mind to connect your very essence to your very self and to connect to the divine and to divinity. And that spiritual dimension of yoga can lead to a very powerful contribution that's called selflessness. The process of yoga, spiritual purification, leads to selflessness. How many of you love ice cream? Okay, thank you. But there's a problem with ice cream there. It's Fantastic to taste ice cream. The issue with ice cream is its ideology. The ideology behind the ice cream is enjoy it before it melts. And the thing is, life is such as well. It melts away. And people who believe in the ideology of the ice cream say enjoy your life before it melts. A very selfish ideology. Narcissistic and selfish ideology. Self-absorbed. Contrast that with the candle. What is the ideology behind the candle? Give light to others before it melts. An ice cream melts and a candle melts, but an ice cream is all about narcissistic self-absorption and a candle is about selfless contribution. Ladies and gentlemen, it is time now that we need to help ourselves and people slowly make that shift from being an ice cream to a candle. The more we stop living as an ice cream and the more we start living as a candle, we will think about the ocean, we'll think about the polar bear, we'll think about some little girl in Syria, we will think about someone out there, because we are not self-absorbed. We are trying to be a candle to look at how we can offer a solution to these issues. You know something? The first letter of the word illness is I, and the first two letters of the word wellness are W and E, which is we. And it's quite Isn't it fantastic that when we move from I to we, illness turns into wellness? Ladies and gentlemen, it's very easy to make a buck, difficult to make a difference. But together we can all indeed make a difference in our way, our tiny bit, step by step, and contribute towards Dealing with the issues of climate change and other issues that the world confronts today, and yoga can be such a massive step towards it. The philosophy of yoga teaching us sensitivity, the practice of yoga teaching us self-control, and the process of yoga bringing us to selflessness. The 3 Ps leading through the 3 Ss when we connect them all, that's yoga for climate change. I had a personal experience when I just joined the monastery about 24 years back. In India, when we joined monasteries, even in homes, we didn't have laundromats and washing machines. We just had the traditional Indian way of doing our laundry. We would have detergent in water and we would soak the clothes for about 30 minutes and then And after 30 minutes, we would rinse them in another bucket of clean water. That was just how we did it. So I came to a monastery, obviously, and we didn't have a laundromat. And up until then, I was 21 when I joined the monastery, up until then, the laundry was always done by my mom. So here I was now in the monastery, never ever did my laundry, and I'm confronted with this orientation now of learning how to do my laundry. So I learnt it. And one day I remember I had to go for an event. I soaked my clothes in detergent and water for 30 minutes, and then I went to the bathroom now to rinse them in another bucket of clean water. But being a little lazy of who's going to bend down to pull the water, pull the bucket under the water faucet, I just kicked the bucket under the tap, under under the water faucet. And then I heard a voice of someone from behind me asking me, what are you doing? I said, just filling in water to rinse my clothes. This elderly monk said to me, oh, I can see that, but what are you doing? I said, I mean, I'm just rinsing my clothes. He said, I can see that, but what are you doing? I mean, being a little shocked at the way he was bringing this up, I said, "What are you hinting to?" He asked me, "Why are you kicking the bucket?" I said, "Look, it's a bucket, not you. Why are you so concerned and why are you so bothered about just a bucket, right?" You know what he told me? He said to me, it's not about a bucket, it's about an attitude of insensitivity. If you treat your things insensitively, you will end up treating people, nature, the resources on the globe insensitively as well. Start with the smallest things in life and you will see how that attitude starts percolating in the larger things of life as well. A man walking on the road in a small town found a piece of paper tied to an electric pole. The paper had a small note written on it, and so, curious to know the contents, he went closer and read what was written there. The note read, I'm a poor woman and I've lost 50 rupees. Somewhere around here on the road. If any of you happen to find it, could you kindly bring it to me at this address? Due to a very poor eyesight, I can barely see, so please help. The man followed the address and found an old dilapidated hut with a much older lady sitting outside. As she heard the sound of his footsteps. The lady, who looked really weak and frail, asked, "Who is it?" The man replied, "As I was walking on the road nearby, I found ₹50 there and then happened to read the note that you put up on the electric pole. So I came over to hand this money to you." Hearing this, the lady began to weep, and she said, "Dear sir, at least 30 to 40 people have come over to give me ₹50, saying that they found it on the road and that they read the note on the electric pole. Well, trust me, I didn't write that note. I cannot even see properly, nor do I know how to read or write." "It's okay." 'Please keep this money and get something for yourself,' said the man. As he was about to leave, the lady asked him to tear that note off on his way back. As the man walked back, he wondered about who could have written that note, and certainly she would have asked every one of the 30 to 40 people who had come to bring her the ₹50 to tear that note, but none had done it. The man mentally thanked the person who had written the note and thought to himself, if one truly wants to help someone in need and makes an attempt, so many more Come forth to join the chain of kindness and make a positive difference. It takes one person's genuine will to help, and then there is always a way. As the man was walking back, his spirit uplifted by the positive energy and the joy of serving, another man walking by stopped him and and asked, 'Can you help me with this address, sir? I just found a 50 rupee note and want to hand it over.' Let us feel grateful for being blessed with what we have, and let us try and be instrumental in sharing even a tiny bit of what we have with those who are not only in need but are utterly helpless. Let kindness and love spread in the world, and let humanity be the ruling force. Well, two guys graduated from university together, and after a couple of months joined the same company. After two years, their manager promoted one of them, Rahul, to the position of a senior sales manager, but the other one And Jeetain remained in the same position as he had joined, a sales officer. Jeetain felt hurt, disgruntled, and even felt jealous of Rahul. Since he needed the job, however, he continued working anyways. After a couple of months, Jeetain's bitter feelings towards Rahul grew so much that he just could not work with him any longer. He wrote a his resignation letter, but before he handed it over to the manager, he complained that the management did not value hardworking staff and that they promoted only the ones they favored. The manager was well aware that Jeetan worked very hard for the company, even harder than Rahul, and thus he much deserved the promotion. But something was missing in Jiten. So to help Jiten, the manager gave him a task. Can you go and find out if there's anyone selling watermelons in town? Jiten returned and said, yes, there is a watermelon seller. The manager asked, how much is the selling price per kg? Jiten drove back to the town to find out and then returned to inform the manager that the vendor was selling the melons for ₹13.50 per kg. The manager told Jiten, let's give Rahul the same task and see his response. So in the presence of Jiten, the manager said to Rahul, can you please go and find out if anyone is selling watermelons in town? Rahul instantly left, and on his return, he reported to the manager, sir, there's only only one person selling watermelons in the whole town. The cost is ₹49 per watermelon and ₹32.50 for half a melon. He sells them at ₹13.50 per kg when sliced. He has 93 melons in stock. Each one weighs about 7 kgs. His farm can supply us with melons for the next 4 months at a rate of 102 melons per day at ₹27 per melon, inclusive of delivery charges. The melons are excellent in quality, appear fresh and red, and taste way better than the ones we sold last year. He also owns a slicing machine and is willing to slice for us free of charge. We need to strike a deal with him before 10 AM tomorrow. If we do make this deal, we'll surely beat last year's profits in melons by ₹223, contributing positively to our overall performance as it will add a minimum of 3.78% to our current overall sales target. I have put all this information down in writing and is available on a spreadsheet. Please let me know if you need it as I can send it to you in 15 minutes. Jiten was was dumbfounded. Impressed by Rahul's smartness and inspired by his commitment, he realized the difference between himself and Rahul. He decided not to resign but to learn from Rahul. Ladies and gentlemen, it's not what we do but how we do that makes us different and stand out from others. It's not about doing things but about going the extra mile that brings us the reward. It's not merely hard work but smart work that gets us there. It's not about looking at others but about looking at oneself that brings us excellence. Next time you find someone else doing better than you, don't complain. Put your act together, do your homework thoroughly, walk the extra mile, and then maybe fast or slow, success will surely be yours. They say pride cometh before the fall. You can make things as big, you can be as successful, as ambitious, but when there is This pride, God knows how to crush that pride to powder. You know, I mean, I have been a speaker for years now, and sometimes, you know, I give talks and people are like sitting and hearing, and most times people come and say, Babuji, what you are saying is very good. This is what I gave the talk for. But there was one man, one man came up to me and said to me, I hate your lectures. This is the first time. I hate your lectures. So I asked him, you hate me? I was so humbled. I went to my college, College of Engineering, Pune. He was from there. He was one of the alumni. So was I. So there was an alumni program. I was invited as a keynote speaker. I went for the speech. I was all prepared for what to say. All my notes were there. My mind was prepared. My words were there. I had already visualized myself standing at the dais speaking, how the students would all Visualization was done, so it wasn't— it was peanuts. I've been doing it all my life. I'll tell you something. That day, this guy was sitting at the back, way back in the program, and he was standing up and hearing my talk. And just 2-3 weeks back, he had told me, I hate your lectures. I'll tell you, it happened several times, but this time, the fiasco that I did in my lecture. You cannot imagine. Everything was here. I knew everything. My lecture notes were all there. I just couldn't speak. Spoke something, of course students didn't detect. After 15, 18 years of speaking, kujh bhi vo la toh unko toh kuch tha, ya chatta hai. But for me, I knew I wasn't together. It was a big failure. When I came back to Pune, on my return in the car, 2 students, alumni, were with me. I was talking to them what could have been the reason for this mess-up before. Hey, one reason was pride. Pride, you know. It's no problem doing big things, ambitious things, successful, titanic success. But when there is pride, that success is a failure. You know, with pride, success is a failure, and with humility, an apparent failure is a success because you can come out of that failure. Yoga is an incredible science that helps us transform our physical fitness, which is what it's largely known for today. But beyond even physical fitness, it's that science which can help us enhance our mental wellness. But I think even beyond mental wellness, yoga is a science that facilitates the deepening of our spiritual awakening. But to be honest, more than physical fitness, more than mental wellness, more than a spiritual awakening, yoga is a tradition, a culture, a set of values, a set of beliefs that can truly help us deal with much larger issues in the world than fitness. May it be climate change, or may it be issues that are being tackled by the 17 Sustainable Development Goals of the United Nations. Poverty, hunger, gender equality, education, life on land, life underwater— whatever these sustainable goals may be, yoga has a solution, a proposed solution to deal with these larger problems and challenges that the entire world confronts today. I know that as soon As we hear the word yoga as a solution for global issues, we are skeptical. How can a system of exercise, how can a system of breathing be a solution to global issues and problems? Which is why I very strongly and firmly believe that we have to start thinking about yoga as more than exercise. We have to start thinking about yoga yoga as dimensions which has the tenets to offer us solutions to our global problems. I was in London once, working and walking at Soho Street, Oxford Street, near Soho Square, and one gentleman, British gentleman, came up to me and said, is that your favorite color? Because everything's orange. Yeah, I said, I guess so. I didn't, of course, want to explain to him the deeper significance of what it meant. He didn't want to know. He just wanted to know if it was my favorite color. I said, yeah, I guess so. I think orange represents flames of fire. You know, on one hand, it represents flames of fire. And in the Hindu tradition, when somebody leaves this world, they're cremated. The body is kind of burnt, consumed by the flames of fire. So donning saffron on actually means that I am dead to my own personal interests. It's like these flames of fire have consumed my own selfish interests, and now on, my life is meant to be for the betterment and welfare of others. It's like you're killing your own ego. Killing your own ego, yes. And it's kind of now living for others. But that's what is meant to be. Of course, it's a lifelong journey to live by it, but that's it signifies. The other aspect of saffron also is like, you have saffron as in kesar, you know, the saffron strands. So you take saffron strands. If you've ever added saffron strand to a prep, you usually kind of first roast it a little bit on a pan, in a pan to take the moisture off. And then you take a little bit of milk and crush it hard in that little tiny bowl of milk. And it starts leaving all the color and the fragrance and the flavor. And then you add it to whatever prep, like a whatever prep, you know, you just add the saffron to it. So, uh, if you compare someone's life to saffron strands, then it also means to be a little bit crushed, a little bit roasted, a little bit by life, to be able to add color, fragrance, and flavor to the lives of others, you know. So that's what it really means. Of course, long way to go to be able to live like that, but that's what it signifies. Israel has two famous lakes, the Dead Sea and the Sea of Galilee. The Dead Sea is a lake with very high salt content, as high as 35%, which is almost 10 times the normal ocean water. Such a high level of salinity not only means that a human body can float on the surface of the water water, but also that there is no life at all in this lake. No fish, no vegetation, no sea animals. Nothing lives in this lake, and that's how it gets its name, the Dead Sea. Just to the north of the Dead Sea is the Sea of Galilee. Yet completely unlike the Dead Sea, the Sea of Galilee is pretty, resplendent with abundant, colorful marine life, lots of plants, lots of fish. In fact, the Sea of Galilee is home to over 20 different types of fishes. And guess what? Both the lakes are in the same region and both receive water from the very same source, the River Jordan. Yet while one is full of life, the other is dead. The question The question obviously is, how? Not sure how technically correct this is, but some say the reason is because the River Jordan flows into the Sea of Galilee and then flows out. The water simply passes through the Sea of Galilee, in and then out, and that keeps the lake healthy and vibrant, teeming with marine life. But the Dead Sea? Being far below the mean sea level, has no outlet. The water flows in from the River Jordan but does not flow out. And since there are no outlet streams, it is estimated that over a million tons of water evaporate from the Dead Sea every day, leaving it salty and too full of minerals and thus unfit for any marine life. Isn't life very similar? Like the two lakes receive water from the River Jordan, we may also be fortunate enough to receive resources, knowledge, love, respect from others. But if we do not learn to share what we have received, we may end up like the Dead Sea. The love, the respect, the resources, the knowledge could all evaporate. But if, like the Sea of Galilee, we share what we have, we will be full of life and joy, ready to receive more and share more and live in a space of abundance. Comparison leads to envy and insecurity, and insecurity and envy leads to dirty competition. Competition, when it's healthy, no Competition to excel yourself. You compare yourself with your previous score, na? Why you are comparing yourself with another's score? Last year this is what I got. Let me compare myself, my current score, how I should improve now. But no, we are so concerned about what others do than I do. And then heart burns, you know, burns. Peace is gone. Like the Titanic was gone, our values and our peace and our satisfaction is gone because constantly, constantly the mind is focusing on this. You know, that is envy. I don't mind losing, but he should lose. Because you made it this far in the video, I want to celebrate you. Most people start and don't finish. Most people never actually follow through. Most people say they want something but they don't ever do the work to actually get it. But you are different. You are special. Believe Nation, you made it here all the way to the end, and I love you. So as a special celebration, if you put a hashtag #believe down in the comments below on this video, I will showcase you and celebrate you somewhere on the screen in a future video because you are awesome. To see my one-on-one with Sadhguru, check the video right there next to me. I think you'll love it. Continue to believe, and I'll see you there. You invest your life in trying to change the past. This is like banging your head on a wall which is not going to break anyway. It's your head which will break. What you can change, you do not change. What you can craft
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