How to Build Confidence When Facing Challenges

What's up, Believe Nation? It's Evan. My one word is believe, and I believe in you. I believe you have an amazing gift inside you that I want to see explode out onto the world. Now to help you on your journey today, we're going to look at 7 ways to instantly make your life more positive. So one of the things I get asked a lot by entrepreneurs is, how do I stay positive? Because it's hard. Being an entrepreneur is really, really hard. There's so many obstacles that come in front of us. There's so many people who tell us we can't do it. We've got our own voices in our head saying, this is never going to work. Who am I to think I can do this big thing? Always constantly doubting ourselves. And so the ones who win are the ones who stay positive, who even though all of this crazy stuff is happening around them, they still find a way to stay positive and keep going. And so today I'm going to share with you my 7 ways on how you can stay positive if you are an entrepreneur. Way number 1, and maybe the most important, is stop seeking approval. This one is really tough. A lot of times we are doing things because we want to look good in somebody else's eyes. We want to make our parents proud, or we want to do the thing that in the magazines are doing, or some celebrity is doing, and we're only working off of making other people happy. And that is the fastest way to being unhappy. There's maybe not a faster way to get to a negative place because you're never living your version of your life. You're trying to photocopy somebody else's life. There's a great line by Quincy Jones, who's a legendary music producer, who said, "Not one ounce of my self-worth comes from your opinion of me." And I think that's a really powerful way to live your life. If you could live your life and go off and do the things that are scary for you, the things that you really want to do, but you're afraid of failing in front of somebody else, you're afraid of what somebody's opinion of you might be, if you can If you can ignore that and move through, it allows you to do so many powerful things. A quick story. I was on a ski lift going up to the top. I'm doing my snowboard practice, and I see this girl trying to do these jumps on the hill. And I want her to jump, I want her to jump. Every time she jumps, she falls. Every time she jumps, she falls. So finally she's at the bottom of the hill, and I'm at the top of the lift, and I'm looking down, and she finally hits it. The last jump, she hits it. I'm secretly cheering inside like, "Yeah, she did it, it's awesome." I get to the top of the hill now, I get off the ski lift, I'm starting to come down and I think, "Huh, I wonder if I could do a jump. Like that little girl who was doing jumps inspired me. I wonder if I could do that jump." And the first thought that came into my head was, "What if I fall? Like who's here, who's watching?" And I'm thinking, I was just on the ski lift cheering this girl on silently and now I'm afraid of how people will judge me. And so it's so crazy how much we restrict ourselves and hold ourselves back because we're worried about how other people will see us. And so learning to catch that. As soon as I get a thought of how I might be perceived by somebody, and if that's holding me back, then I have to lean into it more. As soon as I'm afraid of speaking here when there's people walking by, right? As soon as I'm afraid, then I have to do it more because it builds that muscle. And so whenever you feel yourself playing small or shrinking down because you're worried of somebody else's opinion of you, then you have to go and do that thing. And doesn't mean you get in their face and you're angry towards them, or you have to, you know, be super bold in their face and offend them. Just means you're doing your thing and you don't care what other people's opinion of you are. Way number 2 is to run into your problems. We don't like problems, right? In general, as humans, we don't like problems. We want to run away from them. We want to hide from them. We don't want to address them. We want to feel safe in our cocoon and just not have to deal with the outside world, but that's not a great way to live a positive way because that problem is likely not going to go away. And I find such great satisfaction and joy from running into the problem. So whenever there is a problem, you develop that identity that I'm the kind of person who solves problems, that I'm the kind of person who handles difficult situations, that I'm the kind of person who will have that tough conversation with somebody, because you always feel better after you've solved it. Whatever problem you're facing right now is weighing on you. It's really negative and toxic energy that you're carrying around with you every day, and the longer that lasts, the more negative you're going to get. Just go and solve the problem. Have that difficult conversation. Deal with that tough person. Solve the problem as best you can to get it off your shoulders and move forward. And again, it's just developing that identity, developing that habit, that practice, that anytime a difficult situation comes up, anytime that there's a problem, you are the person who is going to jump forward and solve it. Way number 3 is live your version of your life. At some point you have to figure this out. You know, as you're growing up, as you're making your way through life, you are living your life according to other people. You're living your parents' life. They're guiding you, they're telling you what is right and what is wrong. But at some point you need to outgrow that. Maybe that happens when you're 14, maybe that happens when you're 18, maybe that happens when you're 30. Hopefully you're not still 45 and still only doing something because your parents want you to do it. You need to at some point decide, this is my life, I'm going to decide, and I will deal with the consequences. Like, maybe that means your parents kick you out of the house, so you have to live with that and you have to go and forge your own path. But if you are living your parents' life and you get to stay at home, then you can't complain. You have to make the choice at some point that I am breaking free from other people's expectations. I'm not going to live my parents' life or my grandparents' life or my friends' or what my guidance counselor wants me to do. This is my version of my life. I'm going to take responsibility for it and I'm going to make it awesome. Way number 4 is create a morning routine. I think this is so important, especially for entrepreneurs. What I see with entrepreneurs happening so often is we get excited, we get fired up, we're all ambitious and motivated, and then you're on fire for the rest of the day, and then you fall down. The next day you wake up and like, where did that energy go? And you've lost the mojo and the momentum, and for whatever reason it's gone. And you constantly see entrepreneurs start and stop and start and stop and start and stop. It's like, if you could just stay consistent, you will make amazing things happen. And so for me, part of that is creating that morning routine. You know what makes you feel bold. You know what makes you come alive. Maybe it's watching one of these videos. Maybe it's reading a passage from the Bible. Maybe it's hugging your dog. Like, whatever the thing is that gets you feeling bold and unstoppable, then do that every single morning. Like, start your day with that so that you can be bold from the beginning. If you live your life for the next year doing the thing that made you feel bold and unstoppable every single morning, your life would be unrecognizable from where it is today. And so create that morning routine. You already know the thing that gets you excited. Put that every day so that you start with it so that you can set yourself up for success. Way number 5 is change your environment. You are a product of your environment. You're a product of the people that you hang out with, the habits that you have, the routines that you have. And I look at 2 things here. One, your physical environment. So if you look at my home office, I've got people on my wall, right? These giant canvases of people on my wall. That means something to me. Those people may not mean anything to you, but I walk in there and it means something to me. Also, the people who are in your life, the people who you hang out with. If you're hanging around negative, toxic people all the time, it's really, really, really hard to stay positive. The benefit of an environment and creating one that really supports and builds you up is that it's automatic. You don't have to think about it every day. It's really hard to every morning think and wake up like, "Yes, I'm gonna tackle the day!" Like, that's not how most people at least wake up. That's not how I wake up. If you design an environment one time that allows you to build that boldness and excitement, then it happens automatically for you every day. I just have to walk into my office and I see the things on the wall. I just have to wake up and go to the bathroom and I read a page from the book. It's why I created the Top 10 Rules of Success, that every day I would read one page from the book and feel bold and feel motivated. And that's how I start my morning every single day. And so again, the things that get you feeling bold, excited, you want to put it into your environment, your physical environment, and the people that you are hanging around on a consistent basis. Because those people will automatically trigger your excitement, automatically trigger your confidence, which is so badly needed if you want to stay positive. Way number 6 is accept responsibility. One of the things that I see over and over and over again in successful entrepreneurs is that they accept responsibility. Everything is their fault. Everything is my fault. Everything wrong with my YouTube channel Every mistake that's made by myself or my team is my fault. Every mistake at TDS is my fault. If Alex sucks in front of a class one day, it's my fault. You accept the responsibility. Where most people, what they do is they want to blame. They want to blame the person. They say, Alex, what happened? You sucked that night. What happened? You're just a terrible instructor, right? Ah, it's my fault. And when you stop blaming other people when you stop putting it on Alex or putting it on your team or putting it on the president or putting it on the banker or putting it on your parents or putting it on the government, when you stop placing the blame on other people and you accept the responsibility, first, that kind of sucks to think that everything is my fault. Wow, that sucks because it's great to have somebody else to blame. I would love to blame Alex for all my problems, but really it's my fault. But the second thing it does, once you get through that initial period of suckiness, is it's really empowering because it means if you're in charge, you can go and change something. If you don't like something in your life, you have the power to change it and make it better. And so that is super empowering where you can stop blaming other people around you, the school system, the president, everybody else, and take full accountability for where you are in life and where you are going to be. And way number 7 is to start immediately. One of the most important things you can ever do when you have a goal is to take some kind of immediate action towards achieving that goal. This is where so many entrepreneurs mess up. They create a goal, they get excited, they're watching a video like this, like, yes, this is amazing, I'm gonna go write all these goals for myself, here's everything I'm gonna accomplish, and starting tomorrow I'm gonna go crush it. And then they wake up tomorrow and say, ah, I can't do that, who am I to do that, that's crazy, I was crazy yesterday. I can't actually do those things on that list. I'm going to just fall back to where I was and keep living my crappy life, right? That's what we end up doing to ourselves. As soon as you set a goal, you need to take some kind of immediate action towards accomplishing it. Even better is if you can involve somebody else in it. You have this idea of this new product you want to launch? Email a friend or email a client or email a potential supplier and set up a meeting for tomorrow or for the next week to sit down with them and talk about it. 'Cause you're gonna show up to that meeting. You've created the momentum, and when you commit to somebody else, you're much more likely to continue it happening going forward. And so the next time you set a goal, whether it's tonight, whether it's right now, whether it's tomorrow morning, whenever you set your next goal for yourself, some small form of immediate action towards achieving it. Don't worry about it if it's perfect or not. If your goal is to be a YouTuber, get out your phone and just make a video right now. Stop waiting, just go. And yes, you can make it better, you can get a studio, you can get a friend to film you, but you're gonna get in your own way and that's never gonna happen. So make it happen right now in the smallest form to build up momentum. As soon as you set a goal, take immediate action in some small way towards achieving it. So those are my 7 ways on how to make your life instantly more positive. I would love to know from you which one of the 7 ways resonated the most with you, you're gonna try to apply to your life immediately. Did I miss an 8, 9, 10 that you want to add to the list? Please leave it down in the comments below. Thank you guys so much for watching. I believe in you. I hope you continue to believe in yourself and whatever your one word is. Much love. I'll see you soon. So let me give you the one word secret to happiness. One word. This is all you need to be happy. The most important word ever. If you had to think of one word that's most important to you or that sums you up or that would be kind of like a little beacon, Hey Believe Nation, if you want to know what the most important one word is for Tony Robbins, Gary Vaynerchuk, Oprah Winfrey, Will.i.am, and Howard Schultz, I have a very special secret video for you. Check the description for details.