Master Your Mind | 14 Minutes to Embrace & Transform Pain

Pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain.

Embrace the pain.

Pain.

Hello, Believe Nation.

My name is Evan Carmichael. My one word is believe, and I believe that entrepreneurs will solve all of the world's major problems. So to help you on your journey today, we're going to learn how you can embrace the pain. And also, guys, if you're watching, if you hear something that really resonates with you, please leave it down in the comments below. Put quotes around it. You might win a prize. But also when you write it down, it's much more likely to stick with yourself as well.

Enjoy.

Pain is temporary. It may last for a minute or an hour or a day or even a year. But eventually it will subside. And something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it will last forever. Listen to me, I'm telling y'all as I leave. I'm telling you as I leave, I was homeless for 2 and a half years. And the problem with most of you, you never felt no pain before. Y'all spoiled. Y'all spoiled. Some of y'all spoiled, just bottom line. Your parents have done everything for you. You never had to do nothing for yourself. You spoiled. We gonna keep it real tonight. Some of you are spoiled brats. Every time you ever got in trouble, somebody in your house got you out of it. Every time you done something you not supposed to do, people say, "Eric, your mother's a tyrant." You right! She kicked me out, you right, she's mean, but she developed a man because she put me out there and said, "You gonna have to grow up." And some of you have never learned to grow up. And so every time something get hard, you quit, you call mama. I dare you to take a little pain. I dare you. I dare you not to go home. Somebody said, "I don't go home, I feel bad." Go through it. You ain't gonna die. At the end of pain is success. You're not gonna die because you feelin' a little pain. "I'm not eatin' like I eat at home." That's why you about to go to the next level, 'cause if you keep eatin' like you ate at home, you will keep bein' a boy or a girl. It's time to become man, woman. So don't worry about a little pain.

Pain is necessary. It's inescapable. It's no way. I mean, out of pain we are born. Pain is a must. Pain, it is a necessity of growth. Be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Pain is a necessary evil. Get used to it, motherfucker. Make friends with it and then kick fucking pain's ass. And that way, when it comes to take you down, you can brush that fucking shit off. I'm used to you, motherfucker. Bring it on. Come on, pain. Sit your ass down and let's have a fucking lunch together. Me and you, pain. Let's do it. Best fucking friends.

There's a bunch of people that will say, "Yeah, well, I have a family, so, you know, it's a great idea for you to just go out there and go crazy. I have people to support." You need to listen. Stop saying that. Stop saying any of those things. Every single person who has ever done anything worthwhile or exceptional or difficult or extraordinary, anyone, whether it's great artists or authors or mathematicians or whatever the fuck it is, everyone encounters difficulties. There is no easy road. It does not exist. It is impossible. Everyone has issues. If you have If you have time to pursue a hobby, if you have time to do anything in your life, you can better yourself. And here's one way you never better yourself: when you come up with excuses for why other people are successful and you're not. That shit is fucking dangerous. When you give yourself an escape, "Yeah, well, that's easy for you to say. You know, you do this, you do, do, do, do." Trust me, everybody has a hard road. I wanted to jump out a window several times during my young life. I wanted to jump in front of a fucking train, just end it because too much pressure. Not really, but you know what I'm saying, theoretically. We all go through hard times. We all go through depression. We all do go through doubt and then moments in your life where it's really fucking difficult and you're trying to figure out what the fuck your path is gonna be. It's hard as shit. But Stefan and I were talking about this before the podcast starts, that that is what makes you a person, and those difficult moments are what build your character. Show me a great man who's the son of a great man. You know, that's what we're saying. These kids that are born billionaires, you're fucked. You're fucked. You're never going to be a self-made person. You have a backup trust for your backup trust for your trust, and you're fucked, man.

Experiencing pain in your muscles and aching and just then go on and go on and go on, and this last 2 or 3 or 4 repetitions, that's what makes actually the muscle then grow. And that divides then one from a champion and one from not being a champion. If you can go through this pain barrier, you make it to be a champion. If you can't go through, forget it. And that's what most people lack, is on this having the guts. The guts to go in and just say, "I go through and I don't care what happens." You know, it aches and if I fall down, I have no fear of fainting in the gym because I know it could happen. I threw up many times while I was working out, but it doesn't matter because it's all worth it.

And one does have to be focused on the short-term and money coming in when creating a company because otherwise the company will die. So that the— I think that a lot of times people think like creating companies can be fun. I would say it's not, it's really not that fun. I mean, there are periods of fun and there are periods of where it's just awful. And particularly if you're CEO of the company, you actually have a distillation of all the worst problems in the company. There's no point in spending your time on things that are going right. So you only spend on things— on your time on things that are going wrong. And there are things that are going wrong that other people can't take care of. So you're like the worst. You have a filter for the crappiest problem in the company, the most pernicious and painful problem. So I wouldn't say it's— I think you have to feel quite compelled to do it and have a fairly high pain threshold. And there's a friend of mine, who says like starting a company is like staring into the abyss and eating glass. And there's some truth to that. The staring into the abyss part is that you're going to be constantly facing the extermination of the company, because most startups fail. It's like 90%, arguably 99% of startups fail. So, So that's the staring into the abyss part. You're constantly saying, OK, if I don't get this right, the company will die. It can be quite stressful. And then the eating glass part is you've got to do the problems. You've got to work on the problems that the company needs you to work on, not the problems you want to work on. And so you end up working on— problems that you'd really wish you weren't working on. And so that's the eating glass part. And that goes on for a long time. So how do you keep your focus on the big picture when you're constantly faced with, "We could be out of business in a month"? Well, it's just a very small percentage of mental energy is on the big picture. Like, you know where you're generally heading for. And the actual path is going to be some sort of zigzaggy thing in that direction. And try not to deviate too far from the path that you want to be on, but you're going to have to do that to some degree. But I don't want to diminish the— I mean, I think the profit motive is a good one if the rules of an industry are properly set up. So there's nothing fundamentally wrong with profit. In fact, profit just means that people are paying you more for whatever you're doing than you're spending to create it. That's a good thing. And if you're not— if that's not the case, then you'll be out of business, and rightfully so. You're not adding enough value.

The key is what we do in our times of pain. Pain will change us. Heartache, loss, disappointments They don't leave us the same. When I lost my father, I didn't come out like I was before. I was changed. If you go through a divorce, a legal battle, a friend betrays you, eventually that will pass. You'll get through it, but you will be different. Now, how the pain changes you is up to you. You can come out bitter or you can come out better. You can come out with a chip on your shoulder blaming God, or you can come out stronger with a greater confidence in God. You can come out defeated, giving up on your dreams, or you can come out with a new passion, a new fire, excited about the new opportunities in front of you. All of us experience pain. My challenge: don't just go through it, grow through it. That difficulty is an opportunity to get stronger. To develop character, to gain new confidence. Anybody can give up. Anybody can let it overwhelm you. But you know what that's doing? Wasting your pain. That pain is not there to stop you. It's there to prepare you, to increase you, to develop you.

People used to take my raps and crunch them up and throw them on the ground. I used to get made fun of all the time because who believes that the guy sitting next to them in math class is going to blow up and become a superstar? You don't believe that, right? But like, You should have. And it's a bummer, you know what I mean? Because I— yeah, I don't know, man. I mean, take it, take it and make, you know, pain is the best inspiration. So if you're a creative out there and you're getting bullied, take it and make something great out of it.

Have you ever watched a James Bond movie where it doesn't look like he's losing at some point and then he wins? Or Batman or Iron Man or any superhero? There has to be some diversity for you to, you know, overcome to win. You know, you can't be a champ unless you, you know, are in a place where you look like you're going to lose and then you win. The pain that's going to come with being independent, you have to embrace it because it's going to happen. And also know that the more successful you get, the more problems you're going to have, the more knots you're going to have to untie. Being a boss does not mean smooth sailing. It means having the ability to care about other people before yourself and to untie problems, untie knots. That's all it is. There's— it's not business if there's not problems. There's nothing good without struggle. It just doesn't happen. In all my experiences, there hasn't been one thing that's been successful without me feeling pain before it was successful. So now when there is pain, I embrace it. You know, I've been embracing it. I'm a G about it because I know that must mean that if I'm cool, that, you know, what awaits me is like the darkest before the dawn. I don't want to like sound corny, but that's really what— that's what has to happen.

Now I know that I personally have experienced quite a bit of disappointment in my life, and I'm assuming that you have as well. And guess what? We're going to continue to be disappointed throughout our lives. At least we should be, because if you're not, that means that you're really not trying. Now, how you handle yourself post-disappointment, this is critical to your emotional and mental well-being. Pain, pain, hurtin', right? It's part of the growing process. But I'll tell you something, life has a funny way of closing doors in order to keep you moving in the right direction, all right? So often in our society and as people, we run from pain. We do everything we can to protect ourselves and to shield ourselves from feeling uncomfortable or that feeling of pain. And this is the reason why so many people abuse drugs, alcohol, casual sex. We do this to not feel the pain, but I'm saying stop running, stop trying to mask it. All right, when you feel pain, disappointment, it's okay. Don't try and cover it up. What you should do is actually embrace it. I know it's easy for me sitting here saying, "Oh, embrace the pain. You're feeling like crap. Don't worry about it.

Feel it.

Feel it." I get it, right? That's not— that's kind of a long shot. But what I'm saying is that the pain is normal. It's natural. It's a part of the growth process. A learn from it. Once you do, you accept it, you embrace it, learn from it, put it in its place, you're gonna be able to move forward stronger, faster, smarter. If you're not struggling and getting disappointed from time to time, this probably means that you're not really pushing your limits too far. Alright, it's okay. Embrace it, don't get discouraged, and stay focused.

Pain is a beautiful thing. Challenge is what life is about. A life without challenge, a life without pain, is a life without growth. And where there is no growth, there is stale, stagnant energy. And that's where most people live, because most people's lives are designed around treading a path that is void of challenge. The minute they recognize challenge or pain, they move the other way. This is a primal instinct and normal and natural, but a weak perspective. Most people are bored if you ask them. What do you think about your life? Same old, same old, every single day. What was the thing? Same day, same different day, things of this nature. That's because they're living their lives in a lie that is shrouded in comfort. It doesn't exist. They're not challenged, they're not growing, they're bored, and they're better off dead. Your aliveness is found in your pain. Embrace it, love it, and grow from it.

Thank you guys so much for watching. I hope you enjoyed. I'd love to know what did you take from this video that you're going to immediately apply somehow to your life or to your business. Leave it down in the comments below. I'm really excited to see what you have to say. So thank you guys again for watching. I believe in you. I hope you continue to believe in yourself and whatever your one word is. Much love. I'll see you soon.