Evan Carmichael reviews Jason's landing page for a "How to Be Real Blueprint" program. The core message about authenticity is solid, but the headline lacks a compelling pain point, the target audience isn't clear, and there's no call-to-action. Evan recommends rewriting the headline to address a specific problem, defining who the program is for, and adding an email capture or sign-up button.
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Hi, I'm Evan Carmichael. Welcome to another edition of Ask Evan. In today's episode, I'm going to answer a question from one of my forum readers, Jason, who we've seen a couple of times before now. And he wants me to check out his landing page and sales letter for a new program that he's launching called the How to Be Real Blueprint. So I thought I'd create a new video and help him out. So he has two links. One is to a landing page and one is to a sales letter. So we'll open both. And the first thing I noticed before was that the sales letter page is not found. So there's a broken link somewhere. So can't help you much here on this one, Jason. But looking at the other one, this is a video that basically explains the program a little bit. It's talking about how to be yourself and, you know, why you can be afraid of being yourself and why it's important. I like that message. There is a lot of people who are afraid to be themselves and it is a good competitive differentiation when you can be yourself, when you bring that to your business, then you're much more likely to be successful than if you try to act as somebody else. So I think there's a message in there, and if you can help people with that, then that could be really useful for them as they try to grow. I scroll down here, and this doesn't really captivate me. My screen is a little bit smaller here that I'm recording because the dimension is just a little smaller, but my actual screen, I would see this normally above the scroll. And this is where the scroll ended for me. So it's imagine meeting that person you look up to, your idol, you're finally blessed with the meeting, and the first thing they ask you is, "Who are you?" And to me, that's not really a big pain point. I really liked what you were talking about higher up on the page about, you know, being yourself and learning why that matters and being real. I think that's important. But then this down here doesn't really grab me. So if I just hit on this page myself, I would probably leave that. Quickly because this main message, which is a lot bigger than the message above, doesn't really pull me. The other thing you'll find a lot is people may not necessarily read this. If you find a small text above a video or picture, you'll find that the eye quickly gets drawn down here to the video and this might get missed. So this is what actually is most interesting for me and not what's below. So you might want to just work on this, this text a little bit. As you scroll down, you see that it's a really long form text. So there's a lot of these types of products that are out there. You run the danger of being associated with internet marketing products, which are usually seen like this, and there's a lot that are not really great quality. So you want to be careful that you don't fall into that trap a little bit. It is clearly laid out, so your eye doesn't get too tired. There's pictures. It's laid out well with this, you know, difference in colors and things are bold and some things aren't. It's great to see that there's testimonials on here, so it's people that, you know, you can read and it shows their name, their full name, it shows what they do. Below it shows some of their websites, so that's really great. Again, pretty easy to read here. It's broken up well. So that goes on and on, more testimonials, etc. Quotes. It's great. What I didn't get the sense of here is who your target market is, and I know we've talked about this a little bit in the forums, apart from what I'm covering in this video. So talking about who your target market is, who this can help. Instead of helping everybody, if you can focus on a particular market, you're much more likely to be able to speak to them and their pain points, and you're more likely to get people to take that next step, whatever action you want them to take. So this course is for you if blah blah blah, not for you if these things. It's great, but what I don't see here is what do you want me to do? Like, what's my next step? If people can sign up for this, or, you know, the only thing here is if you have questions, contact me. So it'd be great to see what the next step is. If it's just a landing page for now, get people on a, on a, you know, leave their email to opt in so that you can contact them when you launch. That, that might help, you know, in terms of your conversions. Overall, it looks interesting. Again, I would work on the top. If people don't like what they see at the top here, they're going to bounce right away. So I would make this a little bit more talking to the pain of people. I don't know if meeting your idol and them asking, "Who are you?" is really going to be a huge pain point for a lot of people. So I might switch that up and talk about some of the pain points that you really help solve. I assume your course talks a lot more about how people can get confidence in themselves and develop their message and understand what they believe and what they stand for instead of what they're going to tell their idol if they meet them. So That's what I would try to focus on in just the sales presentation, and I think you'll get a much better chance of getting people to convert. But make sure you have something on there about conversion too at the end, okay? So that would really help in terms of getting the momentum built up for this launch. So good luck, Jason. I hope the video helped, and keep me posted with how you do with it. For everybody watching, if you liked the video, please give it a thumbs up below, and it'd be great to hear your comments. Let me know what you think about this website. Let me know what you've done in the past, if you have any thoughts or questions. And it'd be great to hear from you in the comments below. So thank you, and we'll see you on the next episode.
