Melissa Wood: The Meditation Practice & Daily Ritual That Saved Her Life | TUH #175

Since I was really young, it didn't feel right. Something felt off. I now know it was anxiety.

I have a lot of empathy for people that have truly suffered with anxiety. The majority of the way that people cope with it is they just keep themselves hyper busy because being alone is the answer. But it's the most uncomfortable place.

I am not anxiety. Anxiety is not me. These are feelings that I can feel and now I have the self awareness to understand that.

The fact that you can face it and have tools to handle it I think is very empowering. Where would they start?

I share walking, meditations, combinations of breath, work with mantra and stillness. There is something really profound about sitting with yourself.

Every person that I hold in high regard in my life that meditates has told me how dramatically transformative it is.

Meditation doesn't turn anything off off. It tunes you into yourself.

I assume that you didn't have a lot of strong guides around you. So at some point you said this isn't working out and you took some kind of step towards fixing it. What was that tipping point when you.

Say like people out here are listening and feel that exact way. The number one thing that changes everything is.

Hey guys, welcome back to the ultimate human podcast. I'm your host, human biologist Gary Brecker, where we go down the road of everything, anti aging, biohacking, longevity and everything in between. And if I don't start this podcast out by giving my wife the credit for getting this guest on the podcast, she's gonna kill. She's like, I needed to be known that I was responsible for getting Melissa Wood Tepperberg on your podcast. So welcome to the podcast.

Thank you. And thank you, Sage.

Yeah, you're see big shout out babe.

She follows through. I just have to really give it to her from one woman to the next who like if I say something, I'm going to do it. And I love that. So.

Oh, so she kept up with it, huh?

She was so persistent in the coolest way of just like, you know, following through and just answer my text in three months.

By the way, just wonder if you're alive.

Like no, she.

That's awesome. I got to tell you, my, my daughter Madison, my daughter in law Megan and, and my, my wife are enormous fans of yours and I think they really identify with your journey. And you know, I find something really fascinating about my podcast, like the more of these podcast interviews that I do and there's sort of this common theme and I think you fit this theme very well that runs through most of my podcast guests. And they. They become passionate, influential, impactful people because they solved the problem. They solved the major problem in their life. And. And it wasn't just a problem that was unique to them. It was a problem that was germane to so many people, but they just hadn't found the wherewithal to fix it. And maybe it was chronic Lyme disease or drug and alcohol addiction, and, you know, in your case was eating disorder, body morphic issues, and even, you know, an addiction which you've been very open about. I'd love it for my audience that's not familiar with you, if you just kind of walk us through that, your early 20s, when you started really realizing that, hey, there's something that I've got to face and something I need to take personal possession of and just walk us through that. That journey.

Sure. You know, I want to start by saying that to this day, with everything that I've built and who I've become, I wake up every day feeling this energy around, you know, it. I don't want to say it's ever felt solved, but heard you say that. Yeah. Like, I know what I need to do to get into a place in an energy field, to move beyond these negative thought patterns and these. This low vibrational way of being.

Yeah.

So I think it's just like, first and foremost so important for me to say that. Because you can see a person.

Yeah.

All this stuff, and it's just like, well, they're healed.

And I love that you. I've heard you say that you still wake up ever. Almost every day with these intrusive thoughts every morning.

Well, it's an immediate darkness, but it's.

But now you recognize it.

Right.

And you have tools to handle it.

Exactly.

And, you know, you might actually be the person that finally gets me to start meditating because. Oh, and I. I don't want to lose your story, but every single person that I have talked to that has taken meditation serious, you know, Will, from Whoop you. I mean, just. I've had literally hundreds of guests. Not a single one of them has said that meditation is something that's marginal or has a marginal impact for me. They talk about the massive transformative impact that it has. So I definitely want to go down that road. But I think your story is so unique for my audiences. Doesn't know you. I want them to get to know you because it's, you know, when. When my wife Sage spotted you and told me we've got to get her on the podcast, and then I found out how many circles we ran. We actually were at dinner for Dave Grutman's birthday in, In. In Vegas, I think at Komodo.

Yes, Back there.

But there was a lot of sparklers and a lot of stuff going on, so I don't think we got a. A chance to really connect. But you connected with Sage, brought her here. But as I went down the rabbit hole of your story, I was really just. I. It impacted me in a way because I said this is a solution that so many people need to hear. Not just women, even though it's mainly germane to. To women, but so many people need to hear this radical acceptance of who you are and this radical acceptance of taking responsibility for yourself and then the ability to get comfortable with self care. And I think, I think so many women especially struggle with that. You know, the 82% of all autoimmune disease is in women.

Right.

And I don't think that's by accident. I think it has a lot to do with. With not having the wherewithal to go on the journey that you've gone on.

It's been such a journey. I. I grew up in Syracuse, New York, in a broken home and just a very dysfunctional upbringing and being around that environment.

Six siblings, right?

Yes, I have. Well, there's six of us total.

Six total.

Yeah. I have four sisters and a brother.

Okay.

And just chaos, but chaos in a way. You know, I think it was just normal to if. If something needed to get across. They're screaming, there's yelling, there's not a lot of listening. There's a massive lack of communication. And since I was really young, I was very self aware of these things and that it didn't feel right. Something felt off. So I really took on this responsibility. Middle child through and through.

I was gonna ask you where you fell.

Yeah. Middle child of the girls to do everything that I could to bring peace into my home, but also to make my mom feel less stressed out because I was so aware that it all felt too much for her to manage. And I was always cleaning, making sure, you know, my younger siblings did their homework and just really took on this task. What's the spread of being like a mini mom?

Yeah.

What's the spread of my siblings? Siblings were all like two. The girls were all about two years apart.

Okay.

So like back to. Back to back.

So that's what I mean when you.

Really think about it.

Everybody was there at the same time.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Okay.

And then my. My youngest sibling, my brother Joe was born when I was 15. So and my. From my dad's second marriage.

Okay.

And, you know, it's just when you grow up in that way, you are living in constant fight or flight and running from the feelings and the stuff, especially when it's not being talked about. And when I moved to New York on a whim, I had, you know, I came to the city with a friend, really had never traveled much. We drove here. I'd never been to New York. Early 20s. And I just remember this feeling of, like, stepping out on the streets of New York for the first time and being like, oh, my God, this is living.

Yeah.

Like, this is like, it's worlds away from Syracuse. If you, if you know anything about people think of New York as all the city. But you get 15 miles north of the city and it's very rural, rolling hills, you know, houses are far apart.

Yes.

So you came into the city and you were like. I was, I need this.

I was just like, this is. This is. I feel alive. Like, this is it. This is like. And I, I got a job. Like, it was like the craziest thing. I was like, walking around Bloomingdale's, met someone at a beauty counter. I was working in Syracuse at the Chanel counter. That was one of my three jobs. I was bartending on the weekends. I was working at an auto supply company during the day. I've always been this natural born born hustler because I had to, you know, like, my parents were doing everything and anything that they could to make ends meet. But I. I realized very young, well, let me pull the weight. Let me get a job when I'm 12, babysitting and working on a farm, picking weeds and strawberries and, you know, getting free lunch and getting a little bit of money and then working at a pizza shop. Like, I was always this kind of just. I have this, like, multi layered way of being like, well, I can do this and this and this and this. And I could take on a lot.

Right. So that's middle child syndrome. That's classic middle child.

Yes.

Yeah.

My middle child. It's the same way.

And then just like moving to New York, like, you know, as I think back now, I'm like, what the hell was I thinking? I had a boyfriend that I lived with back home and there was a lot of dysfunction there, you know, toxic habits. But, like, that all felt so normal and familiar. Like, that was the path if I stayed in Syracuse, that.

I love how you say familiar, too. Yeah.

It was so familiar. It was comfortable.

Yeah.

You know, when things were fucked up, it felt right.

Comfortably uncomfortable. Yeah.

Yep. And I interviewed at the Chanel counter and the manager was like, great, when are you moving here? Went home, told my boyfriend I'm moving. I. I drove a U Haul to New York and you know, like, yeah, now that I'm in my 40s, I'm like, this fire inside of me has always been there. I just, it's like I didn't know what to do with it, but I knew to kind of run with it, right?

Yeah.

And then getting to New York and being with myself, truly, if you know.

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I had a roommate, but she, her boyfriend lived with, like moved in with us. And I felt very alone in this teeny, tiny little closet. It was definitely not a bedroom. And I remember like shutting that door the first time when, you know, it was like the first night of staying there and I just took this gasp of air of, oh, my God. It was like this feeling. I had no idea what it was, but I, I now know it was anxiety. And I was like on the cusp of really, like hitting a spiral. And I just remember, like, nope, I don't know, I'm not going to let that disrupt. And I just hit the ground running. I worked every day. I started, you know, drinking, going out late, wanted to model, but was just kind of chasing after this feeling.

Yeah.

Of being in the scene of.

Yeah.

Of being enough to, you know, when you, when, when you come from a small town and you think, you know, you're known in your small town is like, oh, you should model. And then you move to New York and you go to these castings and there's every supermodel.

Yeah.

You're like, oh, there's levels to this game.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And you're like, well, I Don't know if I should be here. And that was just my mindset. And, you know, also not getting signed by agencies, told that I needed to lose weight and I had already not really in my core, felt enough. So that just brought it all to the surface and then, you know, hitting just my lowest of lows after.

And what was the lowest of lows? Was it because you were partying, you weren't sleeping? I mean, in retrospect, your cortisol's probably through the roof. You probably did have anxiety and you were just like forcing it, you know, and not facing it. I think a lot of people that have anxiety don't fake anxiety. They fake being okay, oh, that's it. And, and so there's a sort of a facade for the outside world, but a massive storm on, on the inside. And then whenever you blow your cork, people like, wow, she's a psycho.

Yeah, literally.

But you're like, no, you didn't, you don't realize how many times the cork almost blew before you saw it. You saw one of a hundred times that I almost lost it. And I, I, I have a lot of empathy for people that have truly suffered with anxiety, you know, because it is, it is the massive sensation of the presence of a fear. It can accelerate your heart rate, it can dilate your pupils, it can, I mean, it can give you a full blown panic attack. And some people walk around at a 6. I mean, on a 1 to 10 scale, they're sort of always walking around at a 6 and they float between a 6 and an 8. And I think the majority of the way that people cope with it is they just keep themselves hyper busy.

Yeah.

Because being alone, which I think you've perfected. And being silent.

Yes.

Which I also think you've perfected is the answer. But it's the most uncomfortable place.

It's wildly uncomfortable. And I mean, you just nailed it perfectly. It was just a constant.

I might be married to somebody like that. Just saying.

I mean, yeah, it's, yeah, it's just this constant cycle of having all of the things come up, right. And you start to feel it and it starts to literally like feel like it's going to explode out of you. So what did I did? What did I do? I became a master at pushing that shit down. When I felt it, I hit it, I ran from it. You know, I was running like I would take Adderall to get through like a cocktail waitressing shift and drink and, and then wake up the next morning.

Right.

You know, with sleeping four hours And I would run for like seven miles. I was like running away from myself.

Because you needed the perfection in your body and you wanted to model and. But you also wanted to fit into the scene and you like, you wanted to be in top position in all of these different things. Right. I mean, for yourself.

Yeah.

Right.

You thought that was perfectionist.

Yeah, perfectionist.

I feel like now I'm like a recovering perfectionist. I'm aware that that is still in there.

Yeah.

But to the point now where I. It's not debilitating. You know, I don't let that storyline dictate how I show up now if things are off. I'm like really comfortable being honest with that. And I actually think it's. It really breaks down walls.

Yeah.

When you can show up as yourself. And from not being able to do that for so many years, because I was embarrassed.

Yeah.

I wanted to appear perfect. I mean, I remember even back in school, you know, I have always loved to dress a certain way and I hoped that it would make people not notice that I was poor and that, you know, we didn't have a lot of money and.

Yeah.

I didn't want anyone to know that there was really no structure at home.

Right.

You know, people weren't really looking up my report cards. I could kind of just fly by the seat of my pants. I was embarrassed because of all of those things.

Yeah.

I've heard you tell the story about how you would take your siblings clothes and you guys would swap.

Oh, yeah.

To try to make it look like you have more outfits.

Totally. I was really good at that.

Yeah.

Still very good at curating.

Faked your way through the school.

School.

And just like, yeah, no one's looking at the report card, but you just were able to sort of skate, skate by. And I think, you know, that little level of vulnerability and authenticity I think is now, you know, looking back, that you're able to. To verbalize those things. Because there are a lot of people watching this podcast that are right there now and they're like, man, how do I. How do I get out of it? And I think it's very refreshing to hear that. You know, I figured it out to an extent, but I haven't 100% figured it out. Right. I mean, it's. It's like I. One of my favorite stories, I. I saw that Ed Mylett talking about his. His father when he was a young kid and his father was an alcoholic and he would always ask his dad if he was ever going to drink again. And his dad Was like, you know, I don't know, but I know I'm not going to drink for one more day. And. And it's like, you know, so you. You start taking these things in. In bite size.

Yeah.

Chunks. So I really am curious about that journey because I assume that you didn't have a lot of mentors or like, you know, strong guides around you. So at some point you either hit a tipping point or you said this isn't working out and you took some kind of step.

Yes.

Towards fixing it.

What.

What was that tipping point? What was that like then?

The number one thing, you know, when you say, like, people out here are listening and feel that exact way. The number one thing that changes everything is owning, like, exactly where you are. And a little goosebump. Me too.

I did.

I got it too.

Did you really? Yeah, I legit have goosebumps. I don't know if we can zoom in on those, but.

Because it's so hard to be honest with yourself.

Is it liberating too?

It is when you're ready. It's scary when you're not. And you're doing it to please someone else. And I think this is where, like, you know, we are on the cusp of a massive shift. I feel it.

I do too.

I feel we see through the bullshit and, you know, all the striving for virality and all this stuff is hitting a point of people want the. They want the real yes. And the raw conversations that can actually make a massive difference in their life. And when you can get to that honest, transparent place with you first.

Yeah.

And then you ask for help and we give over. And for me, it's like that little girl inside of me who always felt like I had to figure everything out.

Yeah.

And that I could carry the weight. And it was, you know, it was up to me. And I think a lot of us feel like we're walking around, we're trying to figure it out.

Yeah.

And if you can not try to figure anything out and you can actually give over. And for me, it was literally being on my knees after a night of being rocked out of my mind and had just purged.

Yeah.

Which was, you know, something that I had done for a while. No one in my life knew because it was the pushing down. The pushing down. And then what happens when you push things down?

Yeah.

It's gotta come out.

Yeah.

And like, that was my release and that was, like, that was my tool that really helped me get lost in it. Like, get lost in the storm of the stuff. And Eat everything in sight that I would not let myself eat because God forbid, you know, I leaned into a slice here and there.

Yeah. Yeah.

Or you gained a pound.

Yeah. Like. And it was just such an obsessive, ugly, like, I hated myself.

Yeah.

Because then there's the guilt that goes with it. You don't like yourself because you don't like the way that you treat yourself. When did you raise your hand?

In that moment, like, on the bathroom floor and, like, getting up in, you know, as the sun's coming up and I'm still up and just, like, looking at myself in the mirror and having this disgust for who I was looking at.

And.

And when you. When you have hate for yourself, it's painful.

Yeah.

And I felt it and I saw it and I. I knew right then and there that I had. That I had a choice. It was like, what, you know, when people say they meet God or a higher power and energy. It's a feeling like you. You will never forget. And for me, it was giving myself the grace, that one moment of just understanding that I did not know the way. I need help. And like, really asking, like, like, please. And then, you know, I've shared this so many times, but I always like to bring in this visual because it was so vivid where it was like, you can continue down this path of mass destruction. You can keep going, tearing it all down. I was nasty in relationships. I would talk nasty to people. I would just about, like, get in fight with homeless people, you know, just really.

Yeah.

Ugly.

Yeah.

And I was awful to myself. I was just very reactive, but, like, explosive. I didn't know how to control anything. I mean, I remember at a young age, my mom was like, you need anger management. And then it was like. Or you can create a new way. You can go down this. This unfamiliar path that is really uncomfortable because to be honest with you.

Yeah.

It was comfortable to stay there.

Yeah.

I didn't give a. Yeah. But to actually.

So common. I think.

Yeah.

It's comfortable. Like.

Yeah.

People don't want to stop in, you.

Know, if you don't have it, you just create it.

Yeah.

And you just.

Yeah.

Oh, I was like a drama creep.

Were you.

If there wasn't drama. I brought it.

You just.

Oh, boy. I would. I would bring it. And I just. It was like, I saw it so vividly, like, take the risk. Create this new path, this new way of being. And I just felt it, like, open up this energy of. And your life is going to change beyond anything. Anything. You can even wrap your head around and it's that, like, it. It. I'm living and breathing that every single day.

Yeah.

And. And I know it's because I actually had the courage to face myself, to face my pain, and I. I still face it every day. Because when you come from really traumatic upbringings and we all have traumas.

Right.

It's. It lives in the depths of your soul. It doesn't go away, but you learn how to cope with it differently. I have learned how to self regulate. And I am a naturally an anxious person. That is my baseline. I don't think that's your baseline. Well, I say naturally, like I can go there. I don't love to say I have anxiety. That is, I am not anxiety. Anxiety is not me. These are feelings that I can feel. And now I have the self awareness and the mindset to understand that. And I've changed my relationship with it. When I feel anxious thoughts now, it's not, you know, no matter what I'm doing, I don't feel this debilitating anxiety, but I can just naturally run on the more anxious side. But that is why I am so devoted to my practice.

Yeah.

And I'm not disciplined.

Yep.

But I have a devotion to myself because I know that if I didn't choose.

Yeah.

To come back to the simplicity of these things that you can do with you.

Yeah.

You don't need anything.

Well, you know, I've heard you talk about how when you raise your hand, finally got a therapist. Which I think. I think is the. It's the ultimate sign of strength. It's not a sign of weakness. And I think people that raise their hand for help are. Are the strongest in the bunch. But you raised your hand and you got a therapist. But then you started manipulating your therapist.

So like, you know, it takes a. You change overnight.

Yeah.

Old school. Melissa was like, not. She wasn't, you know, no pun intended. But you weren't out of the woods yet.

Right.

You're like. You're like, I got this. She called me professional.

Oh, did she?

I saw therapy.

They're probably really good at that and going, yeah, but you can lie to everybody. You can't lie to me. Right.

Well, I think it all depends because I've seen, you know, many different therapists over the. And you. It really is like choosing a partner.

Yeah.

You have to have the person who helps you really see through your stuff.

Yeah.

And I think sometimes it's a lot of like, oh, yeah, I understand why you feel that way. And it's like, well, you know, I Know you said you have not been taking Adderall, but you seem a little off today. Are you on something like being called right out?

Oh, wow.

Like that's what I needed and that's what I had at that time.

And your pupils are quite dilated for someone in a dark room, you know.

Yeah. And it was a huge part of my journey of, you know, really understanding what, why I resorted to the ways that I did. Like when you understand the why, you see it differently. Like I see my, I see the spiral as it's starting to form now instead of just getting sucked into the vortex.

Right.

And that is what meditation has done for me.

And this I'm really curious about because I think there's a lot of people out there like me. I suffered pretty severely from ADD adhd. You know, I think it was kind of a superpower when I was younger. But you know, as I got older, it caused a lot of chaos in my, in my life and I would move way too fast, which is terrible with time and not particularly reliable. And I've, I've managed that and got it completely under control now. But I think there was a lot of, of, of people out there that, that just think that that's just who they are. There's nothing that they can do about it and they don't turn inwards and take some responsibility. But every person that I hold in high regard in my life that meditates has told me how dramatically transformative it is for them. So, so I'm going to, I'm going to commit to do. I mean, I have other forms of meditation, like exercises. There's many forms to me. You know, I do cold, plunging, I do, you know, red light, any sauna. Yeah. You know, I exercise fairly intensely and to me, when I'm done, I just feel this unbelievable sense of peace. There's nothing I like better than a rock walk in the woods. We have a place in the mountains. I'm telling you, you go for a few mile walk just in the woods by yourself with a rucksack on, when you come out of those woods, there's something magically transformative and I liken it to a type of meditation. So not knowing how to meditate and certainly going from somebody that was, you know, drinking and Adderall and battling an eating disorder and in an environment where you don't have a lot of mentorship around you to someone who's practicing meditation on a regular basis shows you that that must have been a powerful gift, changed everything. Yeah. So can you Talk to me about the early stages of that because I'm like, this is a very self interested question. Like, how did you, how'd you start? Was it like a hallway with a light at the end of the tunnel? Like, what?

Well, you know, I was seeking outwardly for all of the answers and I think that that was also great. Right. Like, I needed to go to therapy. And then I started working with a health coach and I started really understanding more. Like I said about like the why and this mindset. And I was covered in cystic acne.

Oh my gosh.

And I was, you know, seeing all the top dermatologists and just, I was looking for all of the answers. I wanted everyone to tell me what to do and nothing was working. I went on Accutane, which was terrible.

Yeah.

I felt suicidal, depressed, super low. And I naturally dip pretty low, which people are always surprised at because I'm pretty, you know, outgoing in this. But I, I actually think it's those type of people because it's, we internalize it and we're good at hiding it.

Right.

And I just knew I had to go in here.

I had, you just had that visceral.

It was just, you know, I've heard, I heard people talk about it and I just knew that I, I had to go inside. I had to like, come home to me. And I, I, I did, I did like a transcendental meditation workshop for a weekend. And it was really helpful because it's stillness. Right. So, like, I mean, I love breath work and I incorporate breath work into my practice. I know you love breath work and breath work is meditative, but there is something really profound and awakening about sitting with yourself.

Yeah.

And not always feeling like there needs to be an action behind everything that you're doing. And I believe, you know, I share walking meditations, I share combinations of breath work with mantra and stillness. And you know, sometimes like I, you know, I meditated in the Uber on the way here. I meditated quickly and that there's so many micro moments.

One of my favorite biohacks outside of breathwork by far is mineral salts. Baja gold, sea salt. It's got all of the trace minerals that the body needs. You know, most of us are not just protein deficient, meaning amino acid deficient or fatty acid deficient, we are mineral deficient. So a quarter teaspoon of this in water first thing in the morning will make sure that you get all of the essential minerals that you need. It tastes amazing. In fact, I made a steak today. I actually made a grass Bed Steak. Steak with grass fed butter. And I put just mushrooms and a little bit of rosemary and I sprinkled Baja gold sea salt all over the top. Try it. It'll be your new favorite for cooking too. It's the cheapest and one of my favorite biohacks. I don't know, a 15 or 20 bag of this will probably last you five years. This is literally the world's best biohacking secret. Now let's get back to the ultimate human podcast. When you say, I meditated, what were you doing? You close your eyes and.

Yeah.

Is there a visual that you're bringing to yourself or is it just I'm going to be hyper aware and very present? Because, because I have trained myself to be very present.

Yeah.

You know, like I haven't thought about anything other than this podcast since we started. Whereas normally I would be sitting here going, where am I eating from dinner tonight?

Who else is in New York that.

I could maybe connect? But you know, and I don't do that any anymore.

But.

But when you, when you meditate and meditate on the move. Because I, I think people have different inter interpretations of what meditation is. I think they all think it's like, you know, sitting right in the home position and, and in silence and you have this, some kind of visual and you're able to transport yourself to that place. But I don't think that all meditation is like that.

I don't think so either. And I think that is why people feel so intimidated by meditation. Right. Like to me, meditation is deep connection with your breath. Like so deep. Like you are watching that inhale through your nose. Like you can, you can see it. It's like a wave in the ocean, right? Like the waves come up and you see it and it climbs and then it blends into the other wave and there's like this, this stillness. And like that is on that release. Like I see it and it is being so intentionally with your breath, with each breath, but it is also. So I am very spiritual. And you know, I, I feel like I have been a little shy about that over the years because I'm like, you know, imposter syndrome creeps in and it's like, well, who am I? And I'm not. But the reason why I have such a devoted practice of meditation is because it's where God talks to me and where I talk to God.

Wow.

So it's building this relationship with source, with this power so much greater than all of us. And you know, I look at you and I look at, like, wow, what a powerhouse of a man. And I really believe this with everything that I can't imagine what's going to happen if you meditate every day. Like, I'm just like, you guys, I'm excited. Watch out.

Gary Brackettu is coming, guys.

Yeah.

It births a version of yourself.

Is it. Do you feel like it lays off a burden? Because, like you said, it's your time to talk to God, and God's time to talk to you. You know, I'm a Christian. I'm also spiritual. But one of my favorite things about being a Christian is I can lay my problems at the foot of the cross. I feel like I have a direct relationship with Jesus, and I don't usually get religious on my podcast, but for me, you know, very personally, very vulnerably, I do that when I'm. When I do breath work in the morning, I always say a prayer. It's usually just a prayer of thanks because I never go out there to face the sun and start asking for things. I think a lot of people think of prayer as, like. Like their Christmas list, like, all the things they want. You gotta give gratitude, you know, like, you gotta hook me up with all this stuff. Yeah, yeah, fix it for me. Tell me what to do.

Totally. No, no, no.

And. And I think you'll be very disappointed if you go in it that way. So. I like how you're. You're. You're describing meditation very much to the experience I have when. When I, you know, when I pray. And. And trust me, I don't purport to be an angel by any means, but that's been one of the grounding forces for me, too, also, because it's portable and it's very personal. I've never shared those conversations outside of my own brain. I don't share them with my wife. I don't share them with anybody. And. And maybe it's that monologue that you're able to have because you're very truthful to yourself. And. And I think getting. It was really hard for me initially because silence was difficult. I felt unproductive. I felt like I wanted to get to the next thing. And I think a lot of people, when they try to meditate or they try to pray or they just try to sit in silence, the mind just wakes up. Right? I mean, I remember my first ayurvedic meditation session. It was a guided one. My wife and I went to the. We went to the. This resort in Boone in North Carolina, and the therapist sat us down, and he Was like, you know, get calm. Bring your. Bring yourself to your awareness of your breath. And he started. Our toes, started working our way up and I'm like, I'm on my toes. How long is it going to take to get to my. And then he was talking about this hallway with the light, and I was like, clearly something's going on at the other end of that hallway. Like, why are we not down there? We're in the place where there's nothing going on here. And he's like, you're just.

You're not getting it.

So that's okay.

So. But I like, is.

You're.

You had one of those minds. Anxiety, anxiousness, Adderall.

Yeah, yeah.

And now you've got it to a place.

I've diagnosed. I've self diagnosed ADHD for sure. I'm like, it all made sense once I really understood and someone close to me got diagnosed and I was like, oh, wow, this could have really helped me in school. I struggled in school. I was. I never thought I was smart ever. Yeah, I, by the skin of my teeth, got by. Thank God I have a personality in charisma, because I don't know what else worked. I think it was that and cheating, fortunately. And I'm not proud of that, but that was my, you know, coping mechanism. I was like, in survival mode. But so everything you just said, first of all, I love it and, you know, I just. I just had such a. A hit of. So when you do your breath work, if you can just after just, you know, sit comfortably, ground your palms on your thighs. You're not going to do anything. Okay. You're just going to be. And you're going to close your eyes and you're just going to watch the inflow through your nose. Fill yourself up fully, deeply. And then I want you to release, really let it go. All the stuff all the time, the things. Right?

Yeah.

And just stay with the wave of it and when the thoughts. Because meditation doesn't turn anything off, it tunes you into yourself. So then you're able to see that you're going into that. You know, you're going through the checklist. And by the way, happens to me all the time where I start to go like, oh, God, I have all of this things. Shit, did I. Did I send that message to Dylan? And I see it and I. I go, and we're going to come right back. So it's this dance of. It's in the most important thing too, is. Is the language that we use around it. We are not labeling Our practice, you don't have a good meditation and a bad meditation when you carve out the space. And that's what it is. It's this creating of the space every day. Just as you do your workout and your breath work. Stillness needs to be created in our day.

Yeah.

I think so many people struggle with that.

They do. Because we're just so busy.

Yeah.

We're busy doing. And the more still you can become, the more present it all gets. And the beauty of this, of knowing that I don't need to think about anything else because I'm so locked in with you right now.

Right.

And that's just what it's. It's revealed so much to me. It's revealed my heart. It's helped me see the beauty of who I really am. And. And that is when, you know, when I started meditating, when I had no idea what I was doing, by the way.

Yeah.

But I felt this visceral call to just put my phone up with this little cheap tripod I bought on Amazon, and I just press play, and I would just talk after my meditation. And, like, that's 16 years ago.

Right?

This is. This was like 15. Like, I mean, I. Not exactly 15 when I started actually, like, pressing play. It was a decade ago.

Okay.

And I felt like the floodgates opened. Like, it was like the windows to my soul just kind of like the doors flew open, and I would get the. Like, it would just flow out of me, and I would just talk. And it was just this. Like, I was awakening to myself and to this feeling. Feeling. And the more that I started to share, people were so interested, like, tell us more. Like, we want to understand more. And then coming from this background of having, you know, such a dysfunctional relationship with myself, I was torturing myself in my workouts. I was doing an hour of cardio, an hour of strength training, killing myself seven days a week. And if I didn't do that, I was so hard on myself, you know, I was abusing my body for what I ate before, and I would punish myself from during my work. That was my relationship to how I moved my body with hate.

Yeah.

And when I started meditating, I started moving in a way. It was like, crazy. It was like I became this, like, choreographer where I started blending Pilates and yoga. And I was doing all the crazy things, by the way, that I hated it.

Yeah.

I went in anxious. I left more anxious. I was gaining weight. My skin was broken out.

Yeah.

I was just on.

Oh, your hormones were probably a mess. Whacked I mean, stress people have no idea because stress is not tangible.

Yeah.

Like, it doesn't show up on a lab, but it throws your hormonal system into a tailspin.

Tailspin.

Women that are, you know, going through severe bouts of anxiety or very high levels of stress in their life, there's zero chance of losing weight. You're never going to get estrogen to let go of water. You're never going to get cortisol, you know, to allow you into a deep sleep. So I know the fact that you can face it and have tools to handle it, I think is. Is very empowering.

Yeah.

Right. I mean, someone could start this today, right?

Oh, that's the best part of it.

Where would they start if they.

If they want. If they wanted to move in this way? I share everything online. I started online through this. Like, I'm telling you, it was like I just started blending these two forms that felt really good in my body, and it was like I was moving. Like I loved myself.

Yeah.

And when you show up with love for yourself, oh, my God. Like, it's like it just, like it, like it touches you, you know, it like, makes me emotional because I'm like, that is like, how sad that most of us are walking around hating the way we look. Wanting to change everything, wanting to fix nothing's enough. Like, that energy that is such low vibrating energy. That frequency is going to become what is your storyline for everything in life.

Yeah.

And it's like just changing that. The relationship.

Yeah.

How we talk to ourselves is. If there's anything anyone could take, like, sure, I can tell everyone to come meditate and work out with me online, and I would love that. But if you can change, not even just change. If you can. Can become more aware of how you speak to yourself. Our words are frequency and energy.

Yeah.

And we take it in and we hold it. It's just like, you know, we. We fuel our bodies with food. We nourish our bodies. Like the. The words that we choose are what we're nourishing our soul with.

Yeah.

And our heart.

Speak to yourself like you're your best friend. I've heard, you know?

Yeah.

Like, how would you treat your best friend if they.

Some people treat their best friends like.

Well, you used to, right?

Your child, maybe. Yeah. Like, I always think of, like, my daughter and my son and you have two kids. I have two kids.

How old are your kids?

My son is nine and my daughter six.

Okay. So little man and woman, now they're their personalities out.

Like, oh, full Force.

In full force. They are little divas. They're the best, really.

I am so in love with my kids.

Like, I am, too. My kids are my best friends.

They are exactly. Like, I needed these exact humans.

It's.

It's the best.

Yeah.

And you know what's really amazing is that as time goes on, it gets better and better. It really does. I feel it, you know? Like, I remember when my daughter was born. I thought the world was ending. When my. My wife called me and told me she was pregnant. I was like, well, there goes. There goes my entire life. I might as well just turn in my spirit, a youth guard and get a minivan and just check out. But it's. It's so good. And it's. And it just gets better. Like, my kids, I can genuinely say, are my best friends. Like, my ride or dies. My best friends were like a traveling comedy show. I try to go everywhere with them as much. As much as I can. But you, if you've got two little best friends and your kids now, I mean, wait till they grow. It's just. It gets so good. How did they. How did they fit in? I mean, I see your daughter. I saw a funny video that you guys posted the other day, and it was really cute. And you're like, how does it. But what is Mommy like when she does her meditation? She's like, oh, she's kind and she's nice, she's sweet. And then you're like, what happens when mommy doesn't do the meditation?

She's like, she called me a spice and spice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was like, that was so. Oh, my God, it was so cute.

She's so right.

Yeah.

Like, now she feels my hair in the morning, like, this morning. Because she said when I shower and I do my stuff, that I'm just happier. And she's right.

It's so true.

I am.

And they observe that. I mean, I. I think a lot of times I missed this when I was a young parent because I had my first child when I was 27, so. And we were still in grad school, and I was super not ready to be parent. I don't think anybody's like, Really? I was 100 ready.

I was so like, oh, yeah, I found out I was pregnant.

Yeah, exactly.

Like, oh, man.

And you know what's cool is, like, there's this whole woman inside of you that just comes out and you. That you never would have met if you hadn't had a child.

I know that to be true.

Yeah.

I, like, I Remember when I found out I was pregnant, I was like, well, there goes just like. I was like, well, I really wanted to do these other things in my career. And the crazy thing is it was like, it all really just started and opened up.

Yeah.

Once I became a mom, because it also helped really change my relationship to myself and the way I was talking to myself and like, those things, like, this is how we break generational trauma.

Yeah.

I mean, thank God you went on this journey before you had children.

I'm so grateful. Well, it was like, really all in line with.

Well, I guess.

Yeah. Yeah, it was really in line with it all. It just became much more consistent. And I'm like, if there's anything about me, I am. I'm consistent as a. Like, I am so consistent. And like.

And what does that look like? Like, I know that if I was sort of describe what you do. You do a lot of low impact, like, not beat your body up.

Yes.

Types of things. It seems like you've focused on strength and mobility and movement. Functional movement more than physical prowess, which. Which can beat your body up.

Yes. So go ahead.

But what is. What is Melissa with health all about? I mean, what are some of the mantras and things that you guide people on? And what. What does a typical morning look like? I know meditation's involved, but what are the non negotiables for you?

Mm. You know, so MWH is a platform that I really have an offering for everyone. And it was. That was really important to me when I first started, and I wanted an accessible price point because, you know, I remember back when I was in Syracuse and the first thing I bought myself was a gym membership, which is kind of crazy. And it, you know, it was expensive. And I think a lot of the time these expenses take away from us actually taking care of ourself because it just unfortunately gets in the way. And that was really, really important. And, you know, people come to my platform to look a certain way, but I think the. The thing that I really want people to take away is like, this. This isn't just about building this body you desire. This is about truly building this better, this stronger relationship with yourself through meditation, through. Through a consistent meditation practice, through moving your body daily. And it doesn't have to be this big, grand thing. And I think people walk around saying, like, oh, yeah, I meditate sometimes. And I'm like, how is that? And they're like, oh, well, I don't really notice anything. And I always like to bring it back to if you are working out if you're working out once a week, maybe twice a week, you have a good week. And how are you going, like, how are you changing your muscles? Like what results are you going to see? And if we can bring that attention to focusing on and strengthen, strengthening the muscles in our mind.

Yeah.

Just as we put this emphasis on our body.

Yeah.

I mean the power, so much science behind that too. Neuro linguistic programming, the my. The, the mind muscle connection. Even bodybuilders talk about it, you know, really being intentional when they're doing certain lifts and actually seeing their muscles respond better. I mean just being intentional about the physique that you want and actually imagining yourself becoming that kind of physique. And I imagine that meditation allows you to visualize things too because when you create a quiet space, you have some room to create a visual.

You lock in. Yeah, I am, I'm so rooted in myself because of my practice. And you know, it started with this blend of Pilates and yoga, all using your own body weight. That was how I started. And it was really this focus on 20ish minutes. And if you didn't and if you, you know, okay, some, sometimes you don't have the 20 minutes or the 30 minutes. But then I found, I found like okay, even doing five minute arms or three minute apps, just doing something.

Yes.

It's better than nothing.

Yes.

And then what happens is you build this inner momentum and your endorphins right. You know, start to peak and you're like high off your own supply and then the 5 minutes turn into 10 minutes the next day because you're seeking that. Yeah. You just, it's like you embody this feeling and it's undeniable.

Yeah.

And through the evolution of, you know, my own personal growth and practice, it's grown to also bringing in strength. My girlfriend Kim is incredible. She shares all the strength on our platform. And then I've incorporated my own blend of strength and Pilates. And you know, I think what's important as a woman too and just as a person in life is we are constantly going to be told what we have to do.

Yes.

And it's, it's a lot of fear based mindset. We have to do this and how many prot. How much protein and focus on that.

And like we should go down that road too. Cuz I don't do any of that.

Let's go down the road.

People ask me if I count calories. I'm like, absolutely not.

Who is counting calories? Guys. 20, 25.

Like yeah, like dude, there's apps where you can take a picture of a food and it tells you how many calories and how many ounces and macros and micros. I mean, and look, I get it. If you're, if you're a competition athlete or your competition bodybuilder, you're a physique model and you're really trying to fine tune those things and that's what you do then in those frames. Yes. But I mean for the majority of us that are just trying to, I want to live long, pain free life and I want to have a high level of mobility and I want to have a decent level of strength. I'm not trying to, I'll bench press anybody. And, and I think accepting that track is, is a, is a lot, it puts you on this, a pathway to success. But you don't count calories.

Oh my God.

You just eat whole food.

Oh, I, I eat until I'm satiated.

Yeah.

Because you know, we make GLP1 in our guts and, and we make GLP1 in response to nutrient density. So if you eat nutrient dense foods, you will be satiated. You know, it's, it's so funny. I, I, you know, when people are like, well when do I stop eating or how much do I eat? I go eat until you're full, until you are satiated. If you're eating nutrient dense foods now, if you're eating a highly processed diet, you're never really going to get that fullness and you'll. It's very easy to eat a box of Oreos. Right. And but it's very hard to eat three avocados right now to think you could do it. Right. Because nutrient density is there. So, so back to like typical morning for you non negotiables or meditation, some form of movement.

Right.

I really like to, I strive and I say that softly and gently because I'm a mother and I understand especially when your kids are really young, like waking up before your kids, it's like, yeah, good luck with that.

Yeah.

But now, you know, my kids are in a place that I wake up at six and I meditate. I like, I have warm water. I, I really, and I'm telling you from like, from like the moment my feet hit the floor, it's like, you know, it starts where it's just like, oh God. Like I don't, and I don't want to do this or like it's, it feels like another day because like when you really think about it like life is made up of like Tuesdays and Wednesdays. And it's like, there's a lot of them, you know, a lot of them. And it's like, not always that exciting, but like, how can we actually bring our full self to that freaking Tuesday?

Yeah.

And that Wednesday. And I just, you know, I. I have this practice of like the second my feet hit the floor, I'm just like, like, I just like, I'm like, look at my, like my family, like this relationship.

That's the same thing, man.

Gra. And like, I get it. Gratitude, practice, everyone, you know, can I roll? But like, like really having gratitude for what's in front of you, for who you are, for who you're becoming, who you, you know, are.

Yeah.

Constantly evolving to it is heart opening.

Yeah.

And then I go, right. I'm very like. I don't like to have things that will sidetrack me. So, like, the phone can wait. Why? Because I think most people wake up and they go to the for their phone. And then what are you doing? You're giving to everything else before you really give to yourself first. And then so after my warm water, I go, right? And I meditate. And I do like to habit stack. And I love my red light. Do I need it? I don't think I need it, but I like it. It's a beautiful addition to my life, you know, And I'll sit in front.

Of a bed or a panel.

I have the panel And I have 20 minutes. And I do a combination of all of the meditations that I teach and share are what I walk myself through. So first, like when you were like, how do you start? Like, I warm it up. Like I come big grounding. Inhale, breathe it in and then exhale. Like, let it go. Let the weight, the load that we carry. And then big inhale, exhale, really release and then settle and just be. And then just ground your palms on your thighs, watching that inhale. Fill yourself up and with a full exhale, taking in the energy of that release. And as all of the thoughts and the things and the sounds start to creep in, just let them be and make this conscious choice with yourself to come back to your breath. Inhale. Watch that inhale. Feel this energy rising up. And then with every exhale, this melting surrender, this softening into yourself, just being with the waves of your breath. And then I let the words go. Inhale fully. And then as really let it go. Let your shoulders melt down your back, soften your face. Just breathing in the beauty of this moment. Inhale. Being right here, just when you feel Ready? Coming back. Wow.

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You did. You did.

That was actually really good. I did.

I could have stayed there for sometimes breath. I know. I was like. I was like, we're gonna go.

I don't know how that's gonna come out of the podcast, but really, that's okay. Good.

Wow.

And that's, like, exactly like how you just said that. Like, you don't know how it's going to. But that's the best part of it all.

Yeah.

Is you find this certainty in the uncertainty of life.

Yeah.

And this certainty in this knowing and this, like, inner knowing that you're cultivating with yourself. And after I meditate and in some days, I bring in, like, if I'm angry, if I'm really upset, if I'm super anxious, I will bring in Breath of Fire.

Yeah.

I will. Three minutes. And your arms will be cut from just that. Practice alone.

Yeah.

Like. Like really bringing. And then, you know, one thing you can do just, like, in the moment, too, if, like, if I find myself just, like, upticking with all the things I just. Two Inhales deeply Inhale. And then through your nose.

Oh, out through the nose.

Out through your nose. So you can deepen your diaphragmatic breathing. So immediate melt of tension and stress.

Yes.

You can do it.

Natural Xanax.

Yep. It is.

Yeah.

And you can do it anywhere. And, like, that's that's what I love. Like, that's the beauty of meditation. Like, I think, I do think if you can cultivate a practice of stillness and if. If you're someone with a super busy mind, which I think that is all of us bring in a little breath. Like, do your breath work and then just be. And it's. You're going to lock into yourself.

Do you ever do this, like during the day, midday, if you feel like, okay, I had a traumatic event all the time. I just had a tough conversation with my husband or I had a rough two hours with the kids or whatever it is. And you just feel that. Oh yeah, sense of overwhelm. And you're like, okay, this is not going my way. Do you ever just park it? All the time. Really?

Oh, yeah. But like, I've also gotten to the place where, you know, I used to feel like I always have to like, kind of be alone, like in the bathroom or.

Yeah.

In the back of a taxi or wherever it was. And now like even being in like the heat of the moment with something and just knowing that like I can right here, you know, you come back when you, when you be with your breath, it. This practice is an anchor in your life no matter where you are.

Oh, it's so good.

So important you have it available to you.

Yeah.

Like if you're blessed enough to be in. You know what I mean? If we have our breath, we have life.

So true.

And like that is. It's just. It's not something you need to seek and bind.

It's here that's amazing.

So after I meditate, it's usually kind of like off to the races with my kids. So I have my morning come out.

Of that and it's game on.

It is game on. But like I'm locked and loaded. I'm making lunches. I have a playlist so that we are vibing because I did not wake up in that energy. And I want to create a space that feels like, you know, there is joy and we are smiling and we're dancing and mornings are chaotic. And I used to, I mean, I used to cry in the morning after drop off. Sometimes I still do.

A lot of moms do.

Yeah. But like. And I'm making breakfast and this one wants this food and this. And it's a lot of balancing and I do it myself. I love doing the mornings by myself because I feel like it's really shaped this relationship with my kids. And you know, my husband joins kind of midway through. But like I have that Touch point with them and I love putting them to bed by my. Like there's these times where I think it's just really important to, to connect with your humans.

Yes.

And it's really helped me like just build this beautiful relationship with them.

Yeah.

I notice you're also back on the celery juice.

You know, I, I've come come to this wave of like, it was really an internal feeling, like super intuitive of.

Like medical medium of you.

Yeah, yeah. I was feeling really off and we have a big photo shoot this week for, you know, we're doing something with our creators and I was just like, oh God, I'm feeling inflamed. And like this is where like, you know, I had someone comment, but you eat eggs. And like he says not to do that. I don't listen to anyone.

Right.

I listen to my, my inner knowing.

Right.

And I like celery juice. I do believe that I notice a massive immediate reduction in inflammation.

Wow.

And I, you know, I have my way of eating and being and I listen. I also love food combining and I know there's a lot to say around that. People are like, there's, it's not science backed, it's this, it's a feeling. It's like an undeniable feeling.

Yeah.

And for me, when I am feeling off, I know it's like I have a three day reboot because I know that if I can lock in to just like three days of kind of coming back to the, the basics.

Yeah.

It's really simplifying.

Yeah.

You know, it's. What's interesting is the centenarians that are 115, 118 years old right now certainly didn't have the vegan, vegetarian, pescatarian, keto, carnivore, raw food diet book. Right. They did more of what you're doing. And first of all, they ate no processed food because it wasn't around, but they did more of what you're doing, which is eating whole foods. Food pairing, being conscious about what makes you feel one way versus makes you feel another way. Me. Our bodies are so innately intelligent, we all methylate things differently that you know, whether you have an allergy to dairy or not, if it doesn't make you feel good and doesn't show up as an allergy, don't. You shouldn't eat it. You know, I think part of the benefit of, of being present, especially being present in silence, is you actually do start to tune into how you feel. You're just more self aware aware. I mean I noticed a lot of people don't even realize that they wolf a meal down and then they're sniffling and they're flaming and they're congested and, you know, they're clearing their throat and it's. And they're not even aware. They're really just so blind and pushing through their day that they're not even aware of the impact that that just had on their body. And, and if you're manifesting symptoms up here, just think of what's happening in the gut, right? Because, I mean, and that's, that's the sole source of, of everything, our immune system, our mood, our emotional state, you know, our ability for our body to defend itself, our inflammatory cascade. You know, I don't think that there's a mental health or mood disorder that we cannot trace back in large part to gut disruption.

One million.

Yeah.

I mean, I think we're only beginning to scratch the surface of the microbiome and the consequences of leaky gut and the consequences of low grade inflammation in the body. You know, there's this theory emerging in longevity and aging called immuno fatigue, and I think the majority of leading minds would subscribe to this, that, you know, aging, amongst other things, is the slow, progressive overwhelm of the immune system. Right. It's just, it's just fighting on too many fronts.

I know, right?

You take the greatest UFC fighter in the world, if you just keep adding fighters to the cage, maybe it's not two on one or four on one or six on one, but at some point he or she's going to lose. And the immune system is no different. It's, you know, we got mold and mycotoxins and heavy metals and parasites and viruses and, and inflammation and cortisol and, you know, all of these things. And as that toxic bucket just gets to a certain level, then it just overflows and now bang. Chronic, chronic disease. Metabolic syndrome.

Ever.

Yeah.

I, by the skin of my teeth, got by. Thank God.

I have a problem. Acne in your case.

I realize that now.

Yeah.

So, first of all, this has been amazing. You're just as incredible as I thought you would be in person. I wish my wife had been able to make the podcast. She's on the ground, so she's might be on her way. Here she is. Tell Sage that we gave her a big shout out and credited the whole.

Podcast personality and charisma. I don't know what else worked. I think it was that and cheating and fortunately. Yeah, and I'm not proud of that. But that was my, you know, coping mechanism. I was like, in survival mode. But so everything you just said, first of all, I love it and, you know, I just, I just had such a. A hit. It's true. We gotta give credit where credit too.

So I would love for you to give our audience a few tips. Just especially the women that are in that place where you were the first baby step towards this ability to take responsibility and look inward. What is, what does that look like for watching this podcast right now? And they're, oh, my God. I identify with exactly who she was and I'd love to be where she is.

Yeah.

But that seems like a long road. Where do they start?

I believe the first step is to really ask yourself of. So when you do your breath work, if you can just after just, you know, sit comfortably, ground your palms on your thighs, you're not going to do anything. Okay. You're just going to be. And you're going to close your eyes and you're just going to watch the inflow through your nose. Fill yourself up fully, deeply. What do you deeply desire? Like, what in your life right now do you desire above anything else? Like what. What matters most to you? And then I want you to ask yourself, like, how bad, how badly in your life do you want to feel good? And I know for myself, and that's something I say a lot too, my incredible community is how bad do you want to feel good? Like, when you ask yourself that, it reveals to you, like, your truth. And then I want you to release, really let it go. All the stuff, all the things. Right.

Yeah.

And just stay with the wave of it and when the thoughts. Because meditation doesn't turn anything off. It tunes you into yourself. So then you're able to see that you're going into.

Yeah.

You know, because I think sometimes people think that they want to feel good, but then their actions don't align to support their desires.

Absolutely.

And it's time, guys, to get really honest with ourself and to strip back these layers and these lies and the bullshit that you're telling yourself, yourself. And we have to take a good hard look at how we're showing up. Who are we giving our energy to? What are we just endlessly opinion shopping on the phone, talking in circles over things that don't matter and, you know, talking about the drama and stirring the pot. Like a lot of people that, you know, you're going through the checklist and by the way, happens to me all the time where I start to go, like, I lived my Life like that for the majority of my life. And now knowing that that is not the energy that I want to vibrate on. Oh, God, I have all of this things. Shit, did I send that message to Dylan? And I see it and I go, and we're going to come right back. So it's this dance of and when we can get really honest with ourselves. Like, congratulations. It's. And. And the most important thing, too, is. Is the language that we use around. It's time to get to work.

That's awesome.

And we. We have to really want it because the work doesn't end. There's no pretty finish line.

Yeah, yeah.

Achievement that you have, you know, gotten to. This is a. It's a daily, daily commitment to yourself. And the best part is it doesn't have to be hours long. You don't need all the stuff. And listen, I love stuff. Like, I love my infrared sauna, like I said, I love my red light. I like a cold plunge, depending on where I found it. We are not labeling our practice. You don't have a good meditation and a bad meditation. I am in my cycle and. And depending on the temperature, like, I can get down with that. That's revealed a strength within me that I didn't even know that I had.

Yeah.

My wife would say the same thing.

Oh, my God. Like, I mean, it's crazy what it did for me, but when you carve out the space, and that's what it is, it's this creating of the space every day. Just as you do your workout and your breath work, stillness needs to be created in our day.

Yeah.

I think so many people struggle.

You have everything you need.

That's great.

You have, you. You have your breath. You can, you know, use your own body weight. If you don't have the means to, you know, grab a set of weights or a band or whatever it is. Like, start right where you are.

Start right where you are.

Be where your two feet are. So if you. If you haven't moved in years or months. Great. You can begin again right now.

Yeah.

Like, in any moment. Like, if you have a bad day about, you know, whatever it is, like we all do and just like giving yourself that grace. And they do. Because we're just so busy.

Yeah.

We're busy doing, like, just knowing that in that next breath you can choose differently. It's just. And the more still you can become, the more present it all gets. And the beauty of this.

Yeah.

Of knowing that I don't need to think about anything else because I'm so locked in with you right now.

Right.

And that's just so, like, it always just makes me feel so, like, safe with myself.

Yeah.

And knowing it doesn't have to be so pretty.

And this is a lot of what you did at Melissa Wood Health. You take people on this journey. So how does my audience find you?

Yes. So I share everything on my platform. It's a digital platform, global, that we have members all over the world.

Right.

On.

On melissa woodhealth.com.

Okay.

And there's over a thousand of categorized workouts. So whether you're pre and postnatal, I have you covered. If you want a period program, I've got you. I'll guide you through every phase of your cycle. And then, you know, I just.

I love taking a long time to build that. I know how hard it is to create that kind of content.

What? It's. It's revealed so much to me. It's revealed my heart. It's helped me see the beauty of who I really am. And that is when I started meditating, when I.

It's a lot of hours.

It's been a. You know what, though? Like, the best part of it is it's, you know, like, yesterday I went to the office, I filmed one workout. It was 18 minutes, 18 minute full body. And I. Let me tell you, I feel it today. And like, that's the best part of it. Like, I. I like, people think I work out all day. I'm like, guys, I do a workout a day. Like, I used to. Had no idea what I was doing, by the way.

Yeah.

But I felt this visceral call to just put my phone up with this little cheap tripod I bought on Amazon and I just press play. You like, going back to feeling kind of misaligned and all of the things. When I got to a place where I was not trusting in myself and listening to a lot about side stuff, I was doing things that were not me. So I was filming a few times a day. And then I was like, this doesn't feel right. This is not me. Like, I do. And I would just talk after my meditation. And like, that's 15 years ago, right? This is. This was like. 15. Yeah. Like, I mean, I. Everything in the way that I naturally would. And that's how it's worked for so long. I don't pound myself into the ground.

Yeah.

I really want it to be exactly what I would tell someone else to do.

Yeah.

And so I create. We create a weekly schedule which is, you know, this Monday. We had, like, 23. Not exactly 15 when I started actually like pressing play. It was a decade ago.

Okay.

Minute inner thighs, abs and arms. And then the next day is a yoga flow. And then. And it. I felt like the floodgates opened like it was. And today I did a 21 minute booty. Like there's a method to my magic. Like the windows to my soul just kind of like the doors flew open and I would get the. Like it would just flow out of me and I would just talk. And it was just this, like I was awakening to myself and to this feeling. And the more that I started to share, people were so interested, like dick in the way that I curate. Because I want you to really. I want you to really feel and see results. Like you'll notice a shift in three days.

Yeah.

If you can commit. And it's. Tell us more. Like we want to understand more. And then coming from this background, it's about doing something every day and okay. If you want to walk on Sunday. And of having, you know, such a dysfunctional relationship with myself. I was torturing myself in my workouts. I was doing an hour of cardio, an hour of strength training, killing myself seven days a week. And if I didn't do that, I was so kind of just take your day. Great. But it's, you know, we have to move our bodies.

Yeah.

I totally agree.

And for the mobility of our spine. And I love that you touched on mobility because I feel like people are really driving strength home, which I am not saying that is not important. But let's not forget about the fact that if you can't touch your toes. Yeah, but you've got, you know, big biceps. I'm not so sure that that's necessarily the formula either.

I. I could totally agree with you. And. And you know, we have hard on.

Myself, you know, I was abusing my body for what I ate before. And I would.

To remember that our lymphatic system is our main detoxification system in the body. And it's a static system. There's no pressure behind it. It moves by. I mean, it's. It flows by movement, literally. And so that's why like Tai chi and yoga and Pilates and. And mobility exercises, walking are just so incredibly good for you.

Punish myself from. During my work. That was my relationship to how I moved my body with hate.

Yeah.

And when I started meditating, I started moving in a way. It was like crazy. It was like I became this, like, choreographer where I started blending Pilates and yoga and you.

So I wind down every podcast by asking my guests the same question. And before I ask it, you know, we, we're going to. When we end the podcast, we're going to go into my VIP group. They have a couple of questions for you.

Amazing. I love.

Yeah, they got nine questions for you.

Great.

So. And I, I always allow them to ask them directly to the guests. But I, I end every podcast by asking my guests the same question. You know, what is.

I was doing all the crazy things, by the way, that I hated.

I hated it.

Yeah.

I went.

Does it mean to you to be an ultimate human?

To show up as my most aligned self.

That's a good one.

Wow.

I haven't heard that. That is a. That was a good one.

And anxious. I left more anxious. I was gaining weight. My skin was broken out. Yeah, I was just on.

Ladies and gentlemen, Melissa Wood Health. Check around on Instagram. Go over to Melissa wood health.com Melissa, the hormones were probably a mess whacked. I mean, stress people have no idea because stress is not tangible.

Yeah.

Like it doesn't show up on a lab, but it throws your hormonal system in.

WoodHealth.com is where you can find Melissa.

WoodHealth.com we'll link everything in the show notes below. And if you're in the VI to a tailspin. Tailspin women that are, you know, going through severe bouts of IP, we're going to go into the VIP room now. If you're interested in becoming a VIP, just go over to the ultimate human.com VIP and you can join us in one of these private rooms. I look forward to seeing you there. Until next time. That's just science anxiety or very high levels of stress in their life. There's zero chance of losing weight. You're never going to get estrogen to let go of water. You're never going to get cortisol, you know, to allow you into a deep sleep. So I know the fact that you can face it and have tools to handle it, I think is, is very empowering.

Yeah.

Right. I mean, someone could start this today, right?

Oh, that's the best part of it. Where would they start if they, if they want. If they wanted to move in this way? I share everything online. I started online through this. Like I'm telling you, it was like I just started blending these two forms that felt really good in my body. And it was like I was moving. Like I loved myself.

Yeah.

And when you show up, that's cool with love for yourself. Oh, my God. Like, it's like it Just like it, like it touches you, you know, it, like, makes me emotional because I'm like, that is like, how sad that most of us are walking around hating the way we look. Wanting to change everything, wanting to fix nothing's enough. Like, that energy that is such low vibrating energy. That frequency is going to become what is your storyline for everything in life.

Yeah.

And it's like just changing that. The relationship.

Yeah.

How we talk to ourselves is. If there's anything anyone could take, like, sure, I can tell everyone to come meditate and work out with me online, and I would love that. But if you can change, not even just change. If you can become more aware of how you speak to yourself. Our words are frequency and energy.

Yeah.

And we take it in and we hold it. It's just like, you know, we. We fuel our bodies with food. We nourish our bodies. Like the. The words that we choose are what we're nourishing our soul with.

Yeah.

And our heart.

Speak to yourself like, you're your best friend. I've heard, you know, like, how would you treat your best friend if they.

Made some people treat their best friends like.

Well, you used to, right?

Your child, maybe. Yeah. Like, I always think of, like, my daughter and my son and you have two kids. I have two kids.

How old are your kids now?

My son is nine and my daughter six.

Okay. So little man and woman now, they. Their personalities out, like.

Yeah.

Oh, full force.

In full force. They are little divas.

They're the best.

Really.

I am so in love with my kids.

Like, I am too. My kids are my best friends.

They are exactly. Like, I needed these exact humans.

It's.

It's the best.

Yeah.

And you know what's really amazing is that as time goes on, it gets better and better. It really does. I feel it, you know? Like, I remember when my daughter was born. I thought the world was ending.

When my.

My wife called me and told me she was pregnant. I was like, well, there goes. There goes my entire life. I might as well just turn in my spirit of youth card and get a minivan and just check out. But it's. It's so good. And it's. And it just gets better. Like, my kids, I can genuinely say, are my best friends. Like my ride or dies. My best friends were like a traveling comedy show. I try to go everywhere with them as much. As much as I can. But you, if you've got two little best friends and your kids now, I mean, wait till they grow. It's just. It gets so good how did they. How do they fit in? I mean, I see your daughter. I saw a funny video that you guys posted the other day, and it was really cute. And you're like, how does. What is Mommy like when she does her meditation? She's like, oh, she's kind and she's nice. She's sweet. And then you're like, what happens when Mommy doesn't do the meditation?

She's like, she called me a spice involved.

Spice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was like, that was so. Oh, my God, it was so cute.

She's so right.

Yeah.

Like, now she feels my hair in the morning, like, this morning. Because she said when I shower and I do my stuff, that I'm just happier. And she's right.

It's so true.

I am happy.

And they observe that. I mean, I. I think a lot of times I missed this when I was a young parent because I had my first child when I was 27, so. And we were still in grad school, and I was super not ready to be parent. I don't think anybody's, like, really 100% ready.

I was so like, oh, yeah, I found out I was pregnant.

Yeah, exactly.

I was like, oh, man.

Yeah. And you know what's cool is, like, there's this whole woman inside of you that just comes out and you. That you never would have met if you hadn't had a child.

I know that to be true.

Yeah.

I, like, I remember when I found out I was pregnant, I was like, well, there goes. Just like. I was like, well, I really wanted to do these other things in my career. And the crazy thing is, it was like, it all really just started and opened up.

Yeah.

Once I became a mom. Because it also helped really change my relationship to myself and the way I was talking to myself and like, those things, like, this is how we break generational trauma.

Yeah.

I mean, think about God. You went on this journey before you had children.

I'm so grateful. Well, it was, like, really in line with.

Well, I guess.

Yeah. Yeah. It was really in line with it all. It just became much more consistent. And I'm like, if there's anything about me, I am. I'm consistent as a motherfucker. Like, I am so consistent. And like.

And what does that look like? Like, I. I know that if I was sort of describe what you do. You do a lot of low impact, like, not beat your body up type. Types of things. Seems like you've focused on strength and mobility and movement. Functional movement more than physical prowess, which. Which can beat your Body up.

Yes. So go ahead.

But what is, what is Melissa Wood health all about? I mean, what are some of the mantras and things that you guide people on? And what does a typical morning look like? I know meditation is involved, but what are the non negotiables for you?

You know, so MWH is a platform that I really have an offering for everyone. And it was, that was really important to me when I first started and I wanted an accessible price point because, you know, I remember back when I was in Syracuse and the first thing I bought myself was a gym membership, which is kind of crazy. And it, you know, it was expensive and I think a lot of the time these expenses take away from us actually taking care of ourself because it just unfortunately gets in the way. And that was really, really important. And you know, people come to my platform to look a certain way. But I think the thing that I really want people to take away is like this, this isn't just about building this body you desire. This is about truly building this better, this stronger relationship with yourself through meditation, through a consistent meditation practice, through moving your body daily. And it doesn't have to be this big grand thing. And I think people walk around saying like, oh yeah, I'm, you know, I meditate sometimes and I'm like, how is that? And they're like, oh, well, I don't really, I don't really notice anything. And I always like to bring it back to, you know, if you are working out, if you're working out once a week, maybe twice a week, you have a good week. And how are you going, like, how are you changing your muscles? Like, what results are you going to see? And if we can bring that attention to focusing on and strength, strengthening the muscles in our mind.

Yeah.

Just as we put this emphasis on our body.

Yeah.

I mean the power, so much science behind that too. Neuro linguistic programming, the my. The, the mind muscle connection. Even bodybuilders talk about it, you know, really being intentional when they're doing certain lifts and actually seeing their muscles respond better. I mean, just being intentional about the physique that you want and actually imagining yourself becoming that kind of physique. And I imagine the meditation allows you to visualize things too because when you create a quiet space, you have some room to create a visual you lock in.

Yeah, I am, I'm so rooted in myself because of my practice. And you know, it started with this blend of Pilates and yoga, all using your own body weight. That was how I started and it was really this focus on 20ish minutes. And if you didn't and if you, you know, okay, some, sometimes you don't have the 20 minutes or the 30 minutes. But then I found, I found like, okay, even doing five minute arms or three minute abs, just.