Giselle Toner - Mindful Mondays #005- Abusive Relationships

Hi everybody, it's Giselle and it's your Monday video. You know, it's so funny because I was just recently thinking that there is no such thing as coincidence and you may have heard that before, that there's no such thing as coincidences, that everything is already predestined and that basically everything that's happening is supposed to happen for one reason or another. I just about maybe two months ago put the final touches on a program that I'm doing and a product that I'm going to be releasing called the Abusive Relationship Trap. And it's about people that are in abusive relationships. It doesn't have to be women, it could be women or men. Although women are usually the ones that are in abusive relationships more often than not. And it is a ten step course, ten step lesson to help women that are in those situations that are abusive or destructive to get out of and the Grammys. I was reading from a site that's called Upworthy and there is a section on it that says President Obama had pre filmed a message to share during this year's Grammys and he won the hearts and respect of viewers everywhere when he put the plight of rape and abuse victims front and center. He started by stating that nearly one in five women in the US have experienced rape or attempted rape and that more than one in four have suffered some kind of domestic violence. And also it goes on to say that artists have a unique power to change minds and attitudes and get us thinking and talking about what matters. Obama said. And all of us in our own lives have the power to set an example, join our campaign to stop this violence. And I thought that that was really interesting that this is coming out now and it's been huge issue for a very, very long time, you know, as long as men and women have been together. But unfortunately, years ago it was very hush hush. If there was abuse in a relationship, nobody wanted to get involved, nobody wanted to be the person to blow the whistle. But now there are stricter, stricter laws against abusive situations. And so now, you know, people are being prosecuted a lot more. But anyway, I just wanted to go through some of the things that I can go through with you just in case you are in that situation or you know someone that's in that situation, you may be able to recommend that they get some help. But also you can show them this video because I'm going to go through just the first few lessons right now because there are 10 of them and it would be a little too much to go through in this Video. But I'll take you through the first lesson and just give you an idea of what's covered. So the first lesson that I have, it's called the abusive relationship trap. And again, as I said, it's in reference to women or men or anyone that's in a relationship that's not good or any kind of a relationship. It doesn't have to be a romance. It could be work related, it could be child, parent, relationship, anything where there's abuses, undertones going on. Okay, and the first lesson is you need to make a decision now to stop being abused. And without this step, all others will not work. So it's important to really understand that you need to make a decision that you will not continue going through what you're going through and you're taking steps to get out of it. And you know, I think that there may not be, there may not be many of you who have gone through physical abuse, but you may have gone through emotional abuse or verbal abuse. And it's the same physical, emotional, verbal, it all hurts. It's all not okay. And when I was young, I certainly did not have a fairy tale existence. I went through my share of the abusive relationships, you know, both from at home and also in, you know, people that I got involved with after that. And so it is a pretty interesting thing to think that when you come from an abusive situation in your home, you are almost automatically drawn to that in your adult relationships because it feels familiar and it does take a lot to get out of that pattern. Okay. And then it goes on to talk about why we accept abuse and how does it affect us later on in life. And then it goes into healing and there are steps that we need to go into in order to heal and that you are one decision away from healing. There are three bullet points in this particular lesson, this first lesson that I think are pretty important and the one that I did is three. Through your consciousness and intention, you create your reality. The second one is healing occurs from your own supreme power that resides within. And the third one is we train our partners to value us by the way we value and treat ourselves. So those are three important bullet points that we go into in depth. And we have action steps for things that we can do in order to make it better. Okay, there are other lessons. The second lesson is a little bit of the same, but only we take it a little bit further and we go into tuning into your internal feelings that we block signals of pain, we block signals of abuse, and it doesn't have to be that way, from now on, you need to become alert. And when you're feeling that pain, don't ignore it because that's a sure sign that you're in denial and that you need to really understand and focus on what you're feeling in order to get out of that situation that's abusive. I also go into meditation, very simple meditation techniques that don't involve a lot of learning that we're going to help you to focus. Then we go into the third lesson. The third lesson goes into catching yourself, feeding into someone's abuse and standing in your own power. Now that is going to continue you on into the empowerment mode where you're going to start understanding that you need to start getting stronger when you feed into abuse. Basically that means that you are going right along with that other person who wants to keep you trapped in that abusive pattern. And there are ways to get out of it, lots of steps to take to get out of it. Stand in your own power. There are different steps that we go into for you to start feeling strong, to be able to move forward so that you don't accept any more of the abusive situation that you're in. And we'll go into one more lesson. Lesson four. Just briefly, I'm running through these things. You need to build physical and mental strength to get free from an abusive relationship and how you can get strong by practicing yoga. So of course you know that yoga is going to be involved in this because yoga to me is one of the most powerful things that you can do for yourself. Yoga says that all is one. And also another very strong component of yoga is non harming. That means you don't harm others, but you don't harm yourself either. And if you're putting yourself in harm's way in an abusive relationship, you are practicing harmful practices for yourself. Okay? So we need to move away from that and get away from that. And we go through steps. There are many steps that we take in order to get away from that position. Okay. And also to get strong and to get away from that harming situation because it is, it is destructive for you. So I'll just take you through the first four. Right now there are 10 in total. And if you want to, you can share this with somebody that you feel is in an abusive relationship or in a harmful relationship or destructive. Have them tune into this video and also I will be going through lessons 5 through 10 next time. Next video. If you have any questions about this, please contact me and I can definitely give you more information about it. And I'LL give you more information about the actual course that is available and will be available very shortly for anyone who needs it. Okay? So again, I hope that you are doing well. And remember, you are brilliant. Bring your brilliance in, really feel it, and then give it out to the world, because the world needs your brilliance. Namaste.