Fearing Less & Living More (after loss)

Hey there, it's Alexandra. So today's video is Fear Less and Live More. And I've been experiencing a lot more fear in the last couple of months. And there's been a few things that happened that kind of stirred this up in me. And the first one is one of the reasons I didn't want to do this video, but I think it's important is that one of our beloved dog was killed at the beach by another dog. And it was just anybody who has animals, it was just one of the most horrific things I've ever seen in the feeling of helplessness. And I was there with my mom and my son and just not able to get this dog off and him just literally annihilating her. It was really, really hard for me. Really hard, as you can imagine. So that just happened. And it really, I mean, that happened in actually on Emerson's birthday in September and the end of September. And it was just really, it was really hard for me to be with that pain and to stay enthusiastic about life, knowing that anything like that could happen and that loss does happen and that's part of life. And I felt myself just constricting and not wanting anyone that I love to get hurt and wanting to protect everyone. And, yeah, you know, fear isn't a great place to be. And it was just, it was, it was a growing experience for me. And I also just felt my heart opening and expanding and appreciation and gratitude. And then the next month, end of the month, one of our best friends was killed in a speed flying accident. One of the best guys ever. And just such a playful, amazing spirit and just totally unexpected and just happened, just gone. And yeah, so that. Those are two big things. And I had a dear friend who lost two of her, Two of her babies, and it just felt like there was just a lot of death happening around me and just in my sphere. And, you know, there's a part of me that really, I wanted to open up and I wanted to open up and just be like, oh, yeah, this is, you know, embrace the moment and oh, yeah, this now. And it was, it just really shook me. Really, really shook me. And I just didn't want to be constricted. So it was, I mean, I guess the intention for this video as I'm snotting everywhere, is to really be with fear and to be with the vulnerability of being alive. Like, we're all on that path. And one of the great books that I read in this process, just around Death, was Dying to Be Me by Anita Muyani. I Think is her name. Not sure on her last name. So sorry if I messed that up, but dying to be me. And she had cancer and she had a near death experience and she talked about the other side and how beautiful it was and how amazing it was and just her relationship with death and then with life and essentially that she was, what she got was she's here to be herself, like fearlessly be herself. That is, that's what she got. That's what she's supposed to be here when she. It's her time to go. It's her time to go. And it's off into another amazing, miraculous, unconditionally loving, beautiful place. That, that is what death is. That's what I got from the book. So just trusting that, you know, these freak accidents happen, that their spirits have opened up and they're, you know, they're flying high on the next adventure and they're just swimming and in bliss and trusting in that and trusting in the process of life. You know, I had a. Not feeling like I trusted life, you know, like at any point somebody that I loved could be taken from me. And that just, you know, we've all had loss and we're all going to have loss and one day it's gonna be our turn. And how do we stay. Stay connected to ourselves and stay open and to also stay vulnerable and, and not live in fear, you know, and to be ourselves, to really be ourselves and embrace the moment and be where we are. Knowing that it's, that's, that's the nature of life. There is birth and there is death and there's nothing we can do to change that. The only thing we can do is change our perspective and change our thoughts about it and our feelings about it and allowing it to open us up, to open us up to not be so judgmental of people and criticize ourselves and just let life be like, relax into life more. And knowing there's also part, part of this for me that was knowing that I'm strong and anything that happens, I can handle it. Because there was definitely a feeling of like I'm not gonna be able to handle it if something, something else happens or just the feeling of not being able to handle loss. And I know that's not true, but those were some of the experiences that I was having and some of the fears that I was having and to stand in that, that, that life, life is life and it's gonna do what it's going to do and that we can handle anything that happens. The ups, the downs, the Deaths, the losses, the rebirths, the transformations, the things that didn't go the way we thought they wanted to go. And how can we continue to open our hearts? Open, open, open. With any time that our heart gets broken or anytime that our heart gets hurt. Like, how do we stay open? Open and trusting in the life and trusting in the divine process and trusting that there is a divine plan for it all and just being with it. So I think for me, the biggest thing that I got is love. Love the people that are in your life, like, really love them and the animals and the pets and all of it. Just to really love it and to embrace it and to be aware of the transitory nature of life. To have that, not to live into fear. But for me, there's kind of like death is here. You know, there's life and there's death, and to not be aware of death and that things can happen and to take life for granted, like, that doesn't serve us. So being appreciative for what we do have. And then also, as Anita was saying in her book, dying to Be Me, really opening up to being ourselves. Like, we've got to be who we are. Like, we have to be who we are. And if we're not being who we are, we are dying. Whether we're alive or dying, we are on the way to death. So we have to be ourselves. That has been really, really big and fully live our lives no matter. No matter when it's time for to go. I mean, our friend who passed, he was 38 years old, 38, amazing soul. And he lived. That dude lived. So we all have to live. We all have to live. And the two things that I get from our dog and our friend is live, be in the moment and love like that. That's what it's all about. And one little quote that I want to just leave you with is George Bernard Shaw. And I'm sure you've, a lot of you have already heard this, but this is just a reminder to literally just, just let it rip. There is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose, recognized by yourself, by yourself as a mighty one. The being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community. And as long as I live in it, as long as I live, it is my privilege to do what it. I'm not really doing this great, Am I I'm gonna start over right there. I am an opinion that my life belongs to the whole community. And as long as I live it, it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die. For the harder I work, the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no brief candle to me. It is sort of a splendid torch which I have a hold on for the moment. And I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handling it over, handing it over to future generations. And I'll share that quote below just so you can read it for yourself. But this is what it's about. This is what it's about, like really, really burning as brightly as we can and not constricting in fear and not letting fear get to us and not letting doubt get into us. And just live fearlessly and love fearlessly and be fearless and. And that's it. So I just wanted to share that. Fearing less and living more. Open up your heart and just see what the adventure of life brings to you and what will happen. You just don't know. There will be lots of things that are gonna happen, good and so called bad and it's all part of the process and how do we enjoy the ride and be with it all. So I hope this was helpful in some way and sending you lots of love.