How to deal with insecurity

Hey, everyone, it's Alexandra here. Hope you're having a great day. So today's video is on how to deal with insecurity, and I have five tips for you on how to deal with insecurity. Insecurity is a very interesting thing, and it has been something that I have definitely worked on a lot in the last decade. I used to. People never used to think I was insecure, but I was totally insecure. So scared about what people were gonna think and just nervous, and was I doing the right thing? Was I making the right decisions? And I would have moments where I felt really connected to my dreams, and then I'd have moments where I felt like I couldn't do them, and I felt, who am I to do them? And I don't have what it takes. And all sorts of stuff that I have definitely worked through a lot of. And some of the things that have helped me are. I have five things. So the first one is you are not alone. I know I used to always think that everyone else had it all together. They looked like they knew what they were doing, and they were confident. And I didn't think that anyone else really was feeling insecure. But the reality is we all feel insecure. We all have moments where we feel insecure, maybe days or sometimes years where we feel insecure. It is just part of the process. And especially when you're pushing your edges, you're gonna feel more insecure more often because you're doing new things and there's new, new things to learn. So you potentially will have to work with the insecurity and just know that you are not the only one who feels insecure. I know that I felt really relieved when I realized, okay, I'm not the only one. Everybody has it. Even super successful people have moments of insecurity. So you're not alone. And the second one is to challenge your thoughts. And I think this is a really, really important thing to do to challenge your thoughts. What are you thinking about yourself? Do you. That you're not smart enough, you're not good enough. And something that I do when I'm feeling like I feel gripped by maybe a negative thought, I think of having a hundred people in a room, and would every single one of those people in the room say, that I'm not good enough or that I'm not smart enough or I'm not a great cook or I'm not a great writer, whatever it is, would every single one of those people say, yes, I agree with that. And what happens when I do that is that I get perspective. I realize that, okay, this is just my perception of it right now. This is just my thought on it. But somebody else could think that, you know, I'm an amazing chef or an amazing writer, I'm an amazing gardener, whatever it is. And I think it's just really important to gain perspective, just broaden the vision. And also it works if you're feeling anxious. You know, say you're feeling anxious about a situation. Imagine, you know, even 10 people in a room. Would all of those people facing what you're facing right now, would all of them feel anxious? And a lot of times you can be like, no, that person might feel energized by it, or that person might feel happy about it. So there's so many different ways that we can approach our circumstances in life. And we actually get to choose. We get to choose what we want to feel. Do we want to feel anxious? Do we want to feel joyful? And I just found that it's really helpful to imagine whole bunch of people. So hopefully that helps you. I know it definitely helps me. And the third one is to let go of the negative stories about yourself. We all have the negative stories that we've played over and over and over and over throughout the years that they just become who we are. So really pay attention to what negative stories keep repeating themselves and then just make a decision to let them go. Don't keep saying that you're not good at this, you're not good at that, you're bad at relationships or whatever it is. Just stop it. Anytime that you notice it coming up, just say, okay, great, there's my old story, and this is my new story. This is how I want to experience and be in the world. So choose more empowering stories. And I know it can be challenging when you're in the throes of a negative story. But be committed and be disciplined to say, ah, yes, I am. I'm feeling it. And I totally want to go down into victimhood, but I'm not going to. I'm going to stop empowered, and I am going to keep moving forward, forward on this positive story that I want to have for myself in my life. Because we can create any story that we want. There's so much power that we have. Okay, so the fourth one is be you. Like, totally, unapologetically be you. It's challenging to be insecure when you are being yourself, because there's nothing to be insecure about. You are just being you and loving life. So something that I will do If I ever feel insecure, just have some negative thoughts around it. I will check in to see. Okay. Am I in integrity with my authentic self? Am I living the life of my dreams? Am I going for my dreams? Do I feel like I am on purpose? And a lot of times when I'm not on purpose and I'm not doing what I feel like I'm here to be doing, then I'll feel more insecure. So if you can ask yourself, I am in alignment, I am connected to my highest self and I am really living an authentic life, then usually we're not going to feel insecure. But if we are not going for our dreams or we're not doing what we say we want to do, or we're not creating what we want to create, then that is a perfect little environment for for insecurity to come jumping in. So just get in check, get in alignment with your authentic self. And then the fifth one is perhaps the most important one is stop comparing yourself to others. This is a big big one. Because if we stop comparing ourselves to others, then we won't feel insecure because we'll have nothing to compare to. We are just living our life. We are just doing our thing. I know for me, usually when I'm comparing myself I envision like five different people doing different things all melded into one person, one superhuman person. And then I feel like I should be doing all of those things. So anytime that I find myself comparing and usually we're comparing negatively, that we're not measuring up. So if I find that I'm comparing myself, I just say, you know what? I'm not comparing myself. I am. This is my journey, this is my life to live as I choose. And who cares what other people are doing? Literally it does not matter. Do not compare yourself to others. This is your life. You have your own gifts and the only thing that you can do is to give your gifts. If you're giving your gifts and you got your mojo rockin, then my hunch is you're gonna be pretty confident and feel pretty happy and alive. And if you're not giving your gifts, you're comparing yourself to so and so because they're doing it this way. And this is how they create and this is how they write and this is how they parent. This is how whatever, you are going to be miserable. It is one of the sure things that if you compare yourself, you're going to feel miserable. So if you don't want to feel miserable, you don't want to feel insecure. Stop comparing yourself to others and just rock your authentically awesome self. So those are my ideas. Those are my tips for how to deal with insecurity. I hope that they helped you, and I hope that you have a wonderful, wonderful day.