#41 | Why Understanding LGBTQ History Builds Allyship & Courage for the Next Generation

Welcome to Just Breathe: Parenting Your LGBTQ Teen, the podcast transforming the conversation around loving and raising an LGBTQ child. Filled with awesome guests, practical strategies, and moving stories, host Heather Hester always makes you feel like you're having a cozy chat. Wherever you are on this journey right now, in this moment in time, you are not alone. And here is Heather for this week's amazing episode.

Happy Pride Month! I am so happy you all are here. This month holds really deep meaning for everyone in the LGBTQ+ community, as well as those of us who are allies and advocates. I consider it an honor and a great responsibility, really, to share a few pieces of the history of Pride with you all today. Two years ago, a few people really close to me were questioning the existence of Pride. It was around the same time that Straight Pride parades were popping up around the country, which you may remember, which of course led many uninformed or unaware people to challenge the existence of Pride? In my effort to find really good answers, I came across an anonymous quote that has stuck with me ever since: LGBTQ Pride was not born of a need to celebrate being LGBTQ, but our right to exist without persecution. So instead of wondering why there isn't a straight pride movement, Be thankful you don't need one. So simple and so powerful, right? The right to exist without persecution, to love who you love without judgment, to live authentically without discrimination. Up to that point, my answer had always been Seeing and knowing what my child has been through, what Connor had been through and was going through, the self-loathing, the loss of friends, the questioning of his existence, really just saying, "This is not a choice. Embracing one's authentic self without persecution is a right." And while this is all true, this response was from my mama bear heart and based on our family's experience. Having a community, a movement, and facts to back up my wildly protective and empathetic energy is a gift that I am grateful for every single day.

Day.

Pride is a celebration of how far the LGBTQ+ community has come in the past 50 years— oh my goodness, 50 years since the official inception— and how far humanity has come over several millennia. Pride is also a time to highlight the work and shifting that still needs to be done. Not just in June, but 365 days a year. It is a time to embrace the beauty of every member of this community, to educate tirelessly, to empower our LGBTQ+ loved ones and each other, and to love, because love always conquers hate. There are dozens of books, articles, websites, and videos that share the extraordinary history of Pride, and they are available for all ages, from our littlest ones all the way through our oldest generations. And as always, I will list my favorites for you in the show notes, but I highly recommend that you pick at least one to read or watch or listen to or share. What I'm sharing today is an overview. There are so many fascinating stories and interesting tidbits that I couldn't fit in today's show, and if you have been listening to me for any amount of time, you know that I have completely lost myself researching the depth of this topic, but most of what I will be sharing comes from the Encyclopedia Britannica and the History Channel, with colorful additions from Pride.com, the Human Rights Campaign, and PFLAG. So let's get into it. June has been recognized for over 50 years as LGBTQ Pride Month in honor of the Stonewall Riots, which took place in New York City in June of 1969. At that time, homosexuality was illegal in every state except Illinois, and bars and restaurants could be shut down for having gay employees or serving gay customers. In New York City's Greenwich Village, the Stonewall Inn was considered a safe haven for the city's gay, lesbian, and transgender community because most gay bars and clubs were run by the mafia, who used blackmail and other tactics to keep law enforcement away. Police raids were still very common, but for whatever reason, on that very hot June night, the LGBTQ community decided to fight back. There are many, many stories and speculations of exactly what happened that evening, but no written account exists, and of course it was decades before smartphones. But what most seem to agree upon is based on witness accounts, and that is that plainclothes police officers entered the Stonewall Inn that evening, singling out drag queens for arrest. Dressing in drag, or masquerading, was also illegal. Two transgender women of color, Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera were the first to resist arrest and to throw the first bottle, or brick, or stone, depending on which story you're listening to. Nonetheless, they resisted, they threw something, and that ignited the crowd. History shifted in that moment. The Stonewall Inn opened the next day despite being destroyed by the police in the rioting, and that night an even larger crowd was there to resist and revolt. This continued over the next few nights with larger crowds showing up each night. While the violence and the confrontations diminished, the activism and the strength and the spirit of the gay community only got stronger. One year later, the first Gay Pride parade started at the doorstep of the Stonewall Inn. What originated as a gathering of activists grew into a crowd of several thousand supporters spanning 15 blocks in Manhattan. As the news spread, Gay Pride parades popped up in LA, San Francisco, Boston, and Chicago that year, and they've grown across the country over the past 50 years. The Stonewall Riots accelerated the LGBTQ rights movement that actually started in 1924 in Chicago. German immigrant Henry Gerber founded the Society for Human Rights. His group gained some traction and even published a few newsletters before it was forced to disband in 1925. It was the courage of Gerber and so many like him that gave voice, visibility, and validity to the LGBTQ community. These are the bits of history that are so important to remember We know the experience of the LGBTQ community now, and yes, there is still a lot of work to be done, but understanding, appreciating, and honoring the sacrifice and courage of all those who blazed this trail, knowing they would be judged, condemned, and persecuted all for standing up for the right to be who they were created to be. Oh my goodness, it just gives such clarity and meaning to how we move forward, right? So there is just so much I want to share with you, but ultimately I know it is easier to digest new information in small pieces, so I have opted to give you the history of the pink triangle and the pride flag. So as you may know, the pink triangle is now a global symbol for gay pride, but did you know that it was originally intended as a literal badge of shame? During World War II, the Nazis would sew an upside-down pink triangle on the shirts of gay men in concentration camps as a way not only to single them out for torture, but also to further dehumanize them. According to history.com, in 1972, "The Men with the Pink Triangle: The First Autobiography of a Gay Concentration Camp Survivor" was published. The next year, Post-war Germany's first gay rights organization, HAW, reclaimed the pink triangle as a symbol of liberation. It is now worn, tattooed, displayed, and proudly used as a symbol of gay pride. And finally, we have the pride flag. It is not uncommon to see the rainbow flag being proudly displayed as a symbol for the LGBT LGBTQ rights movement, especially during June, but more and more you see it all year round. There are now multiple versions of it, but have you ever wondered how the rainbow flag became a symbol of LGBTQ Pride? I know I always have, so this was a lot of fun for me to research and find out. So according to Nora González, who was an editorial intern at the Encyclopedia Britannica, it It dates back to 1978 when artist Gilbert Baker, who was an openly gay man and a drag queen, designed the first rainbow flag. He was commissioned by Harvey Milk, who was one of the first openly gay elected officials in the U.S., to create a symbol of pride for the gay community. Baker decided to make that symbol a flag because flags historically are a way to proclaim power and pride. He saw the rainbow as nature's most extraordinary flag, and so adding specific meaning to each color, the rainbow became the flag for LGBTQ+ pride. The original flag had 8 colors: hot pink for sexuality, red for vitality, orange for healing, yellow for sunlight, green for nature, indigo for harmony, turquoise for magic or art, and violet for spirit. Baker once said in an interview, "Our job as gay people was to come out, to be visible, to live in the truth. As I say, to get out of the lie." A flag fit that mission because that's a way of proclaiming your visibility or saying, This is who I am. This month I will be sharing the history and meaning of a majority of the LGBTQIA+ flags on social media, so follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and/or Twitter to learn more. I have also partnered with two amazing women in my town, who create donatable centerpieces. I love their mission for doing good and creating beautiful and sustainable pieces. And in honor and celebration of Pride, they created the most incredible candy centerpiece for me to give away to one lucky person. So check out my website, my show notes, or my social media to see pictures All you have to do is share this podcast with someone who needs to know that they are not alone and tag me @justbreathepride2021 and you will be entered to win. Finally, thank you, thank you, thank you to those of you who have written reviews. I am I'm so really, truly touched by each review, each message. So keep the reviews coming because that helps me reach so many more people who need to know they are not alone. Big hugs to all of you. Allow yourself a few moments to truly appreciate the gift of Pride. To embrace your child, to educate those around you, to empower all who need it, and to love, because love truly does conquer all. Until next time.

Thanks so much for joining Heather Hester today. Remember to just breathe. Take a few minutes every day to calm and center yourself. Reach out anytime with ideas, questions, or feedback. Please rate and review Just Breathe on your favorite platform. Subscribe to Heather's website, www.chrysalismama.com, to receive her monthly newsletter and stay informed. Join the private Just Breathe Facebook community to chat with other parents and allies, and share with anyone who needs to know that they are not alone.