The Five First Amendment Lessons Every Parent of an LGBTQ Child Needs to Know Right Now

Free speech and the First Amendment aren't abstract anymore. They're under fire right now in ways that shape our daily lives. Welcome to More Human, More Kind, the podcast helping parents of LGBTQ+ kids move from fear to fierce allyship and feel less alone and more informed so you can protect what matters, raise brave kids, and spark collective change. I'm Heather Hester. Let's get started. Today I'm pulling together the 5 biggest lessons from my deep dive First Amendment series. You'll hear what free speech really protects and where it draws the line, and you'll walk away with clarity on how these freedoms connect, why they're under pressure, and what we can do to protect them. Welcome back to More Human, More Kind. Today's episode is a little different. Soon after Trump took office, I did a 4-episode series taking a deep dive through the First Amendment, what it means, how it's been interpreted over time, and why it matters more than ever. Well, a lot has changed since then, and given all that has happened, In just the past 2 weeks alone, the very real actions our government has taken to eliminate free speech, the dangerous and disturbing suggestions and even declarations that have been made by many Americans, including ones with large platforms who know very well the division and anger they sow with their words. Given all of this and so much more, I thought today would be a good time to bring it all together and share the 5 most important lessons from that First Amendment free speech series that I did. And I really encourage you to go listen to the entire series because, uh, it will go really, really in depth there. But let's get into this today. So Of course, of course, we start with free speech. That is what is being threatened rather successfully, I might add. Think about what just happened with Jimmy Kimmel and the weaponization of the FCC. Think about how your favorite podcaster or media personality or influencer has responded to everything that has happened in the past 2 weeks. Think about the exact words spoken by the President of the United States and the Vice President. Free speech is powerful and it's a cornerstone of our democracy, but it is not absolute. So what does that mean? The First Amendment protects speech from government interference, but it doesn't mean you can say anything without consequences. Protected speech includes political expression, satire or comedy, and protest, even when it's offensive. It includes symbolic actions like kneeling during the national anthem or wearing an armband. It includes unpopular or hateful opinions. As long as they don't cross the line into violence or threats. I'm going to repeat this one because it is so, so important. Protected speech includes unpopular or hateful opinions as long as they don't cross the line into violence or threats. And we're going to get into that a little bit more in a minute, but I want to acknowledge that there are a lot of unpopular and very hateful opinions out there that feel like they're getting louder and more emboldened because they are receiving support and encouragement by those who are in power. I know that hearing those opinions can hurt. They can cause anxiety, stress, anger, pain. I feel all of those things too. But as we are learning to expand our capacities to hold many truths at once, we can also hold that these opinions, no matter how loud or seemingly persuasive they are, are about the person and the people screaming them, not about you or me or any of us. We can acknowledge the truth and how the statements land with us, what they mean about the people spouting them, and stand strong and together knowing that we have a choice not to engage with them and not to respond to their hate, but hold the importance of free speech. Focus all of the energy and angst their words stir in you toward making a difference, protecting your loved ones, yourself, maybe even running for office or supporting someone who is. So where's this line? Where's the line? What kind of speech is not protected and what counts as crossing the line? First, is incitement to imminent violence, meaning specific directives, either to a specific action or to a group of people or to both. Second kind of speech that is not protected are true threats against someone's safety. Clearly there is gray area here. What is considered a threat? What is someone's safety? I don't think I'm alone though, in feeling that this criteria has definitely been violated. The third type of speech that is not protected is obscenity narrowly defined under the Miller test, which has three criteria. The first being whether the average person applying contemporary community standards would find the work quote unquote, work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient, meaning lewd, depraved, or salacious interest. The second criteria is whether the work in question depicts or describes in a patently offensive way sexual conduct specifically defined by the applicable state law. And the third criteria is whether the work in question, taken as a whole, Lacks serious literary, artistic, political, or scientific value. And then the fourth kind of speech that is not protected is defamation, fraud, and perjury. So now that we've brushed up a little bit on what falls under protected and unprotected speech, let's talk a little bit more about hate speech, because that is really what has been at the forefront of so many conversations. We these past few weeks. Legally, hate speech is protected in the United States unless it falls into one of those unprotected categories that I just talked about. The government cannot ban speech just because it's offensive, bigoted, or deeply harmful, or happens to hurt the Orange Man's fragile feelings. Why? Well, because once the government gets to decide which ideas are too dangerous to allow, everyone's freedom is at risk. I'm going to repeat that. Once the government gets to decide which ideas are too dangerous to allow, everyone's freedom is at risk. Again, think about what has happened just in the past 2 weeks. That doesn't mean hate speech is harmless. It causes real pain, as you know, and as I know, and it can set the stage for violence. But legally, the line is drawn when words become a true threat or an incitement to immediate lawless action. This is where accountability comes in. Free speech means you can speak, but it doesn't mean you're free from consequences in your communities, whether that's online or offline, the workplace, your workplace, or in your relationships. That distinction matters, especially for us as parents and allies. We can model that free speech is a right, but that it is also a responsibility. The Atlantic recently had a fantastic article on why America protects hate speech, in part saying the US is nearly alone in its tolerance of hate speech based on the belief that restricting it is more dangerous than allowing it. Onto the second lesson. The press is often called the fourth estate. Its role is to hold those in power accountable, to inform the public, and to make sure democracy doesn't slide into authoritarianism. Whew. Well, I think we can all see where this is flailing right now. There are two landmark cases that remind us why the free press is so important. New York Times versus the United States, the Pentagon Papers case, which affirmed that prior restraint, government censorship before publication, is unconstitutional in most cases. I want you to pay attention to this particular one right now, because this is happening in present, in real time. With the Pentagon once again. Pay attention. You might have to dig deep for it because of course this information they don't want to get out there, but this is important. This is really, really important. The second case that I want you to pay attention to is New York Times versus Sullivan, which protected journalists from frivolous libel suits. Ensuring that they can report on officials without fear of constant lawsuits. So obviously these established a precedence. It is something that we can pay— that we need to pay attention to because, like I said, these things are happening again in real time. But these original cases are 50 years old. The Guardian did a recent story saying the US used to be the gold standard for press freedom. Not anymore. What once set America apart, an independent press, is now under relentless attack. Boy, is it ever, right? And not just from politicians who cry fake news to discredit truth-telling, but also from Misinformation and disinformation spreading rapidly online. From media consolidation, where a handful of corporations control most outlets. Again, pay attention to what just happened, the behind the scenes of why Jimmy Kimmel was yanked from the air. A lot of it points to media consolidation and deals that they're trying to get done. And then finally, from threats and harassment directed at journalists, making it dangerous for them to tell the truth. Globally, the freedom of the press is a barometer of a democracy's health. And here at home, local journalism is disappearing, leaving news deserts where communities are less informed. And more vulnerable to manipulation. So what's the takeaway here? A free press is essential, but it's fragile. Supporting independent journalism, practicing media literacy, and refusing to let quote-unquote enemy of the people rhetoric take root are acts of democratic protection. Depending on what you read and which podcasts you listen to, you may have begun to notice the term post-truth. The idea of a post-truth society became prominent around 2016, notably associated with political events in the US and the UK. And it describes a political culture where objective facts, i.e., the truth, are less influential in shaping public opinion than appeals to emotion and personal beliefs. See which of these characteristics you recognize and what is happening right now. Emotional appeals. What does this look like? Well, public debate is dominated by emotionally charged rhetoric. Rather than factual arguments. The second thing to look for: declining institutional trust. There is a widespread purposeful erosion of confidence in traditional sources of information, such as the news media, academia, and government institutions. And the third thing to look for are quote unquote alternative facts. Misinformation is framed and presented as a valid alternative to verifiable facts, blurring the lines between truth and falsehood. This is all on purpose. I want to take one more minute here and briefly discuss what many, myself included, believed to be the root issue. We seem to be in an epistemic crisis, which is a more profound breakdown in the methods and institutions used to produce and validate knowledge. This happens when a society loses its shared perceptions of a common reality. Sound familiar? Here are the core features of an epistemic crisis. 1. Erosion of authority. Faith and traditional knowledge authorities and mechanisms for verifying truth, like science, fact-checking, and professional journalism, is questioned and dismissed, usually by someone or a group with perceived power or authority. The second feature is information overload. The sheer volume of unfiltered and unverified information, largely from digital media, makes it overwhelming to discern what is true. This has been happening since Dear Leader took office, and perhaps even during the campaign to a certain degree. They call this flooding the zone. The third feature is conflicting narratives. I'm sure you've heard the word algorithm and algorithms thrown around a lot, and you may understand it to a great degree or not at all. Wherever you are, know that it is in part these algorithms that create the echo chambers and filter bubbles on social media. Which amplify conflicting versions of reality. And this makes it difficult to find common ground for public discourse. And the fourth core feature is perhaps the most insidious of all: weaponization of doubt. Disinformation campaigns deliberately sow confusion and distrust to advance political agendas, making the public doubt even well-established facts. Think about what is going on right now with vaccines. Think about what happened just this week with the supposed connection of Tylenol to autism. Most recent analysis points to the conclusion that we are in an epistemic crisis and the post-truth phenomenon is a visible symptom. The decline of trust in established institutions and the fundamental disagreement over what constitutes valid knowledge has enabled a post-truth political climate to thrive. Rather than just a shift in political tactics, it represents a deeper societal breakdown in how we collectively create and validate knowledge. Addressing the epistemic crisis therefore requires more than just fact-checking. It necessitates reevaluating the institutions and practices that produce knowledge and strengthening media literacy and critical thinking skills within the public. This is our actionable to-do list for the foreseeable future. All is not lost. Yet. We now have 3 very clear goals here. 1, reevaluate the institutions and practices that produce knowledge. 2, strengthen media literacy. And 3, teach critical thinking skills to the public. I'm actually realizing now that this is an episode within itself, and I will circle back to it soon. Okay. Moving on. The third lesson, the Establishment Clause. This prevents the government from creating an official religion and it protects our individual right to practice or not practice faith. Thomas Jefferson called it a quote unquote wall of separation. The idea was simple. Government stays out of religion. And religion doesn't control government. But today that wall is under pressure. Court cases and legislation increasingly blur the line from funding religious schools with tax dollars to mandated religious displays in public spaces. And movements like Christian nationalism claim the US was founded as a Christian nation, using that claim to justify policy decisions that undermine religious pluralism and equality. This claim is unequivocally false. You only need to read the Constitution to understand that. But if you want more evidence, check out the show notes. The truth: Separation of Church and State protects Everyone. It ensures that no matter your belief— Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, atheist, or otherwise— you are free to live it without government interference or favoritism. When we allow ideology to override constitutional neutrality, we chip away at one of democracy's most important safeguards. Think about how we're seeing this show up in this current White House, in the Supreme Court, the highest court of our land, in Congress. And now zoom out a bit to where it is becoming ever more brazen in well-funded organizations and far-right platforms. Push back, speak up whenever you hear any narrative that end in church and state belonging together, joining as one. It is dangerous and it is one of the tenets actively destroying our democracy. So our fourth important lesson centers on the right to assemble. So what does that mean exactly? Well, assembly is the right that turns belief into movement. It's about so much more than just protests. It's about people gathering to be visible, to be counted, to create change. Our history is full of examples: the Boston Tea Party, the March on Washington and the civil rights movement, Stonewall and Pride. The Women's March, Black Lives Matter, No King's Day, and on and on. These gatherings remind us that democracy is not passive. It's alive when we stand shoulder to shoulder with others. But assembly isn't limitless. The government can impose time, place, and manner restrictions. And today there are increasing attempts to suppress protest with surveillance, anti-protest laws, and intimidation. In fact, dozens of states have introduced legislation to criminalize protest tactics. Here's the contrast that matters. Assembly is not insurrection. Peaceful assembly is about protecting democracy. Violent insurrection is about dismantling it. From candlelight vigils to marches for justice, gatherings are sacred acts of hope and refusal. Finally, the biggest takeaway: the First Amendment's protections don't exist in isolation. Speech informs the press. The press informs assembly. Assembly amplifies voices. Religion stays free because of neutrality. Petition gives us a way to take all of it to the government. Together, they form a web of protection for democracy. But when one strand weakens, Whether it is through book bans, disinformation campaigns, anti-protest laws, or surveillance, the whole web is at risk. Democracy is not self-sustaining. We're seeing evidence of this right now. It only survives when we use these freedoms, when we defend them. When we teach our children why they matter. Right now, I think the freedom that feels most fragile to me, and this was really hard, I did actually give this one a lot of thought because they all are under attack in different ways. Of course, thanks to the flooding the zone and having a very well-orchestrated attack going on right now, But I think the one that feels most, um, feels the biggest right now is free speech and the attacks on free speech. And I, of course, feel the power of that every time I sit behind this mic to do a podcast episode, to share whether it is something that I'm teaching or sharing a story from the heart or letting parents know that they're not alone on their journey supporting their LGBTQ+ child. Whether I'm interviewing someone, I feel the power and the privilege of free speech every single day. So I want you to really think about free speech, free press, separation of church and state, and the freedom to assemble. And think about which of those, and you can pick more than one if you want, but which of those would move you to show up to actively do something to protect it? For this episode, I put together a ton of articles that I, that I read in preparation that I think give really good in-depth depth background or knowledge on the First Amendment and each of these pieces that we talked about today. So that will be linked in the show notes. Those will be linked in the show notes. I wanna thank you so much for being here with me for this reflection. The First Amendment is more than just legal text. It is a living practice. It's how we protect truth. How we nurture diversity, and how we spark collective change. New episodes drop every Tuesday and Friday, so make sure you are subscribed so you never miss an episode like this. And if you wanna stay on top of what's happening and how it affects the people we hold most dear, I share weekly reflections and resources in my newsletter. You can sign up at morehumanmorekind.com. Until next time, stay curious, stay kind, and keep showing up, speaking up, and fighting for our democracy. Together, we can protect the freedoms that keep us more human, more kind.